Cenobite Warrior: Holiday Specials
Disclaimer: I own nothing, but my OC characters. Any other characters, items or otherwise written in this fic belong to their creators. I would do a list, but that would take up the whole fic.
VALENTINE'S DAY!
Buster: Hey everybody, and Happy Valentine's Day.
Rurrlock: And we are proud to present you with the Cenobite Warrior Valentine's Day special. For all of you expecting a simple love story were everything is at peace and love is all that there is...look somewhere else, because this is one crazy and whacky fic that puts the Va? in Valentine's Day.
Buster: Va?
Rurrlock: Yeah, you know Va? When you're surprised sometimes you say Va? Like that kind of Va?
Buster: Um none of this chaotic stuff happens to me right?
Rurrlock: Of course not, what kind of author would I be? (Rurrlock has fingers crossed behind his back) Now on with the show!
Love Doves
The whole school was in valentine's mood; well, in every other day of the year, kids in horror films are all loved up, imagine them on valentines? Anyway; that's what it was today, Valentine's day, a special time of the year for two people to fall in love and share it with the rest of the world, and boy was Simon just trying to do that with just about any sexy girl he could see...
''So Simon, how does this scam work?'' Simon's little brother Buster, the Cenobite Warrior, asked.
''It's not a scam, it's for charity'' Simon bitterly replied as he put the finishing touches to his newly built desk. A money jar placed on the side of it, and the banner on the top, 'Kiss the hunk for 50 cent...or pence, are we in England or America?'
Simon finally finished up and stood behind the desk ''Now all I have to do, is wait, and the girls will be lining up''.
''Okay, but whose the hunk?''
''ME YOU IDIOT!'' Simon shouted in his face.
''Oh, this is like the charity event you did last Valentine. Remember, when you tried to get that girl to suck your lollipop?''
''What?'' Simon yelled shocked by what Buster just said in a K+ rated story.
''Remember, those strawberry rocket lollies you sold?'' Buster said holding up a strawberry rocket lolly ''What did you think I said?''
''Oh nothing...nothing that's going to happen to you anyway'' He muttered under his breath and chuckled.
''Well good luck, see ya!'' Buster shouted innocently and walked down the corridor. He did enjoy valentines, heck he enjoyed every holiday there was, but valentine's was special. Even for people who were single, they could still enjoy it with friends, and find the day peaceful and where there is nothing in the world but love...although living in a world of slasher villains; many find it hard to agree with Buster. He reaches locker, he forgot the combination number ages ago, but thanks to Cenobite powers, he was able to pull it open. And he got quite a surprise when he saw what was hiding in his locker...
''Zeke, why are you hiding in my locker?''
Buster's slow witted best friend was trembling and looking around as if the cops were on his trail ''It's Valentine's Day, remember!'' He said before closing the locker hard. But thanks to Buster's strength he was able to open it and pull his friend out.
''Why would you want to hide on Valentine's Day?'' Buster asked.
''It's all around us; yucky kissing and lipstick and...The worst nightmare of all...perfume!''
''Oh come on Zeke it's not all bad!''
''Anyway, I'm not really that involved...I'm a sexist'' Zeke said just as a girl walked by. Offended, she hits Zeke across the head with her handbag before walking off, leaving the boy whimpering and rubbing his sore head.
''Zeke, you're Asexual, not a sexist!''
''What about you?'' Zeke asked.
''For the last time, no. Remember, the whole me and Lindsey subplot since the beginning of the fic?''
''Oh yeah! Hey, are you getting Lindsey a Valentine's Day present?''
''Only the greatest Valentine's present in the history of valentine's presents!''
''Well where is it?'' Zeke looked around Buster, curious what his friend had.
''It's not here, Carrie's bringing it to school later''.
''Carrie's bringing what to school later?'' Another voice spoke behind. Buster and Zeke turned to see none other than Lindsey standing behind.
''Oh hi Lindsey, nothing, just a little project'' Buster answered.
Zeke like always was slow to react ''But I thought you said Carrie was bringing Lindsey's...''
Buster immediately covered Zeke's mouth with his hand ''PROJECT! Oh yeah, Carrie also did your project too!''
''Project for what? I don't have to do a project for anything?'' Lindsey said confused. She knew straight away that Buster was up to something, she was literally begging it had something to do with today. She then noticed something else ''Buster, Zeke can't breathe!''
''Huh?'' Buster replied and then realised he was still covering the chocking Zeke's mouth ''Oh my bad!'' He quickly let go and Zeke collapsed to the floor gasping for air.
Lurking in the dark depths of the Leviathan was a plot, a very evil plot, one that could change everything forever for the very worst. And who was it that was devising this evil plot? Why none other than the ex-demon Princess herself, Angelique. In her room; littered with powerful magic books, and the pieces that she would need for her devilish plan. At her table, lay a large bronze cauldron, she waved her hands, and placed all different ingredients into the cauldron.
She enchanted the magic works ''Abracadabra, hocus-pocus, open sesame, this-a potion-a will-a make-a anyone-a fall-a in-a love-a with-a me-a...and...Finish'' She threw a little bit of dust, causing a smoke puff to emerge from the cauldron. As you could tell from her difficult incantation, this was a love potion. She knew of the petty day it was in the outside world, the disgusting Valentine's Day. She didn't see the point of it, everyone pretending to love eachother, when they should be pretending to love her. But this potion will change all that, but as well as bringing the world under her power, it would bring Dark Prince of Pain, XipeTotec to her, under her will.
''Angelique? What are you up too?'' The Female Cenobite spoke as she entered Angelique's room, curious at what was going on.
''Oh, just a little experiment...'' She cooed as she poured some of the potion into a perfume spray bottle. Maybe this could work to her advantage, she needs to test the potion anyway ''Tell meNikoletta, you've always had a thing for Chatterer, haven't you?''
The Female Cenobite, Nikoletta stuttered and the blush on her white cheeks was very noticeable ''Well...err...I don't...I mean he might...''
''Oh come on, I've seen you look at him. You two surely have a thing going on?''
''Well...so what if I fantasise about him, a girl's gotta have her crushes''.
''Tell me about it'' Angelique mumbled under her breath, and then turned to Nikoletta holding the bottle in her hand ''Well see this? A magic love potion, spray this on someone, they will fall head over heels for the first person they lay eyes on!''
''You've been dabbling with magic, Lord Leviathan will not be pleased...''
''How would you like to be pleased by Chatterer?''
''Okay fire away'' Nikoletta responded ready for the potion.
''Good...BUTTERBALL!''
''What?''
''You called?'' The large Butterball poked his head into the room, and just as he did, the demon princess sprayed twice at Nikoletta and Butterball. It was too late for them to look away, and in an instant was on eachother like rabbits, moaning and groaning with such passion the author can't write about it in without worrying little kids.
''This stuff works well'' Angelique grinned. This was finally it; she was never going to get a better opportunity than this for Pinhead to be hers. Just one spray away from doing something that has never happened in fanfiction history...getting Pinhead to love her as well as lust her. And then she could feel it within the walls of the Labyrinth, the box was being opened, it's as if it was being set up for her...nothing can stop her now...
''So Simon, how did the charity go?'' Buster asked. And got his answer when he saw Simon walk over with the money jar over his head ''Not so good then?'' Simon tried to shout at his little brother, but with the glass around him, Buster and the others couldn't hear a word he was saying.
''Charities just don't get any respect anymore'' Buster said.
Lindsey followed up ''Tell me about. But at least he didn't do what some creep did earlier; he tried to get girls to pay him as well as kiss him. What a sick thing to do on Valentine's, if I ever find that creep I'll give him what for''.
...
...
...
...
''What?''
''Nothing'' Buster and Zeke answered at the same time.
''BEHOLD, FOR A MAGIC TRICK OF WHICH THE WORLD HAS NOT SEEN BEFORE!'' Some boy shouted out as a bunch of kids started gathering around him, waiting for his so called great magic trick. The boy was dressed up as a magician, with the coat, the wand the hat, and even the rabbit. But something that caught everyone's attention was what was in the boy's hand...a golden cube with weird black markings around it ''AND NOW...BE AMAZED!'' The boy then looked like he was trying to open it, but to no avail.
All the kids around started getting bored and walked away; the boy tried to call them out to stop, he was almost there, but it didn't look like the box was going to open anytime soon. Seeing that funny box in his hand, Buster got a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach ''I've seen that box before!''
''Look how shiny it is!'' Lindsey drooled, and her pupils took the shape of a dollar and pound sign, again unsure of whether this was set in America or England.
''I know I've seen that box before, I just can't remember where!'' Buster starched his head hoping to remember the origins of this box. After a couple of fumbled attempts, the box in the boy's hand finally started to move, taking different shapes and playing a funny tune.
''It's a music box?'' Lindsey guessed.
''It's a football?'' Zeke followed.
''Mhhmhmm'' Simon tried to get out from the jar.
''AHHHHH! I REMEMBER WHAT THAT BOX DOES! WAIT!'' Buster dashes as fast as his legs could carry him towards the wannabe magician and the box, but he was too late. In a blinding flash of blue light; Buster is sent soaring back right into Simon, and they both crash into the wall, with the jar around Simon's head breaking apart.
''Why does this always happen?'' Simon sighed as he lay under his little brother.
''Hey, I got the jar off your head!''
From out of the dust; half a dozen chains come shooting out and trap Buster up against the wall, and soon figures walked out of the dust, very familiar leather and hook wearing figures. The front man, was none other than the Pin-headed Pinhead ''Ah, so we meet again boy!''
''Hey Pinhead, how's it going?'' Buster shouts as if he was meeting an old friend.
''There is no more escaping us now boy. We have you right where we...'' Pinhead was cut off when he heard some kind of moaning going on behind him. He turned and was quite surprised with what he saw, Nikoletta and Butterball making out; everyone in the room was quite repulsed by this. All but Angelique, who did her best to hide her giggles.
''STOP THIS ABSURDITY RIGHT NOW! BUTTERBALL, NIKOLETTA, WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS!'' Pinhead barked at the top of his voice, shaking the whole room. But nothing was stopping the two loves struck demons. Even Angelique was surprised by this; the potion works better than she ever dreamed.
Meanwhile, the others were trying to take the chains off of Buster, who couldn't help but smile at what was going on in front of him ''Oh, isn't it lovely to see them get along so well on Valentine's?''
''BUSTER! CHAINS!'' The others shouted.
''Oh yeah'' Remembering the job that needed to be done; he started spinning around at an incredible speed, so fast that he started cutting through the wall behind him. CRASH! And then burst back out of it ready for some action. He charged at the distracted cenobites, well all but one was distracted. Chatterer pulled out a large chain from behind his back, with a sharp axe on the end of it. He throws it towards the boy, and it wraps around him stopping him in mid air, and with its huge weight, Buster goes crashing to the ground.
''Excellent work!'' Pinhead said unaware of Angelique right behind him about to use the potion. But he moves forwards towards Buster just before she can spray it; she lets out a loud huff of annoyance, it would look to suspicious if she followed him now.
Pinhead was now standing over the tangled Buster; and with a flick of his hand, hundreds of chains come out of nowhere and try to get a direct hit at Buster. He started crawling and slithering out of the way like a caterpillar dodging a pigeon, no matter how many chains was aimed at him, by some miracle he was dodging them all with great agility and flexibility. But all he could do now was dodge, not much else until he could unwrap himself.
With Pinhead distracted, this was now Angelique's chance; she slowly sneaks up behind Pinhead, potion in her hand ready. Eventually, Buster was moving and dodging so much, he actually managed to untangle himself from Chatterer's chain. He flips out of it, grabs it, and uses the axe on the end to cut at all of Pinhead's chains at him; leaving the Dark Prince fuming with anger and frustration ''HOW? How can you have this much control of your power so soon?''
Buster didn't really hear Pinhead's rant, he was too busy playing with the axe-chain like a skipping rope or lasso ''Hey look, I'm a cowboy!''
''BUSTER, HIT HIM!'' The others shouted.
''Huh? Oh yeah!'' Buster was now serious, keeping the axe-chain as a lasso; he throws it right towards Pinhead. Who easily steps aside as the lasso passes him, but the same couldn't be said for Angelique; who was right behind Pinhead, and now had the lasso wrapped around her hands. Buster pulls back on it, sending the demon princess flying over his head and into the wall next to his friends. She takes a moment to get her bearings straight and find the potion ''Is getting Xipe really worth all this?'' She muttered.
Buster uses it as a lasso again, and this time looks as if he had Pinhead in his reach. But just before the lasso hits it's mark; blue lights surge through the engravings on Pinhead's head, as if the pins were absorbing energy like a satellite dish. And then the energy goes right to his eyes, and from them, two blasts of electrical energy hit the axe-chain-lasso, and the shock goes right through it all the way to Buster. ZIZIZIZIZIZI! Leaving the Cenobite Warrior burnt to the crisp and his lasso turn to ash.
Chatterer grunted through his teeth (how else can he talk?) at Pinhead. The lead cenobite turned to him ''I know that was your favourite, but it's a necessary sacrifice, I shall defeat this boy in no time...'' He was cut off from his speech and the two other cenobite's make out session went above the K+ rating ''And please find a way to stop them, I'll have nightmares about this!'' He told Chatterer.
Buster shook off the ash around him; and had a new idea; he fires two chains into the ground hoping that Pinhead won't see where this attack would be coming. CRASH! One chain emerges under Pinhead, but he just moves back and grabs hold of it CRASH! The other leads to the same result, holding both chains, he pulls back violently and before Buster can react he's pull into the ground, through it and out of it in front of Pinhead...with a little gopher on top of his head.
''I must say that I am quite pleased to see one learn of our ways and might so quickly, but this foolish act of trying to stop us is in vain, just give up!'' But Pinhead's cliché villain speech was falling on deaf ears. Buster spins around and tries to kick Pinhead in the back, but his leg phase's right through him, and the speed and power Buster put in that kick caused him to spin around uncontrollably into the wall next to his friends.
The others crowded around trying to snap him out of his daze, but he was so dizzy you could actually see the stars around his head. Zeke moved in front of his friend ''Buster, Buster, how many fingers am I holding up?'' Zeke just held his fist, no fingers. Buster couldn't even respond his tongue was dizzy ''That's right, zero! You're good at this game!'' Zeke said.
''It's official, you're an idiot'' Simon replied.
''No more games!'' Pinhead said as he stood next to the group, looks like there's no hope for the gang now as the towering British demon priest stood before them ''Now the time has come!''
''Time for what?'' Lindsey asked.
''You know what!''
''No we don't!''
''Don't you dare insult me, you know why I am here!''
''No we don't! Normally you're after people who open the puzzle box, but the main fic has this whole mystery plot were we don't know where it is. And then one moment you want Buster to join you, then you hire different slasher villains to kill him, you aren't clear on your motivations at all. This whole thing is like a stupid fanfiction parody!''
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...
...
''Oh yeah!''
Angelique, recovered from her crash and tumble, moves behind Pinhead, an arm going around his shoulder ''Oh Xipe, truly you are powerful'' She said seductively.
''Oh please, must you indulge in this now?''
''But this time is different, just look into my eyes, and see why!''
''Very well, but if this is some trick...'' Just like a big sucker, Pinhead turns and gets the potion sprayed right in his face. He immediately shuts his stinging eyes, and yelps in surprises. Angelique knew this was it, all she had to do was wait a few seconds for the potion to sink in and Pinhead to look at her; she decides to best way to enjoy her last moments of single life was to insult the still down Buster.
''Ha, look at you weak humans. This is what happens when you cross with me; there will be nothing but suffering and gloom through your miserable existence. The boy didn't stand a chance!''
This got on Lindsey's nerve a bit ''Hey, no one talks about my future hubby like that!'' In rage, she charges at Angelique, tackling her out of the way. By accidental reflexes, Angelique sprays the potion in Lindsey's face, and it could be her last, as her being tackled knocks the potion out of her hand and smashes on the floor.
The echo of the crash rang in Buster's head loud enough for him to gain his conscious back...somehow. He rubs his head ''Ow, Simon I think I got a boo-boo!'' He whimpers, amazing that even when he's part cenobite, he reacts like a baby to boo-boos...I mean injuries.
Simon didn't look concerned at all ''That's great, but now can you save my skin and fight...'' He turned to check on whether Pinhead was ready to attack, but his eyes went bloodshot and his mouth dropped to the ground when he saw what was happening ''HOLY...MOLEY!''
Buster finally looked up, ready for a fight, but was in shock with what he was seeing ''How long was I knocked out?''
Pinhead...
Pinhead and Lindsey...
Pinhead and Lindsey kissing! On the lips!
Angelique saw this anomaly happening and cursed everything she knew existed; her desired one, had fallen for the wrong girl, and what's worse...she spent so long on this potion, and was so confident that it would work and not wanting her and Pinhead to be separated, she didn't even know if there was an antidote ''X...Xipe?''
Pinhead turned to her ''Can you give us a moment Princess, we're a bit busy''.
''Lin...Lindsey?'' Buster stuttered.
''He said we're busy'' Lindsey replied to her friend.
''Dear, I think it matters not whether the others are bewildered by this...rather new chain of events, but as long as we love eachother, right?''
''Oh, of course Pinny!'' She replied before they went back to kissing leaving the others stuck to the spot, especially Buster.
''Lindsey...what's...Linds? Huh? What happened?''
Angelique slammed her fists to the ground ''No, no, no, this wasn't how it was meant to be!''
''How what was meant to be?'' Buster asked her.
''Are you really this dense! I used a potion to have Xipe for my own, and your cursed human friend interfered and now...they...they...I can't even say it!''
''Well isn't there an antidote, there has to be an antidote!''
''You don't think I'm going to find one; I hate this unfortunate accident just as much as you do! It may take me a while though, just make sure they don't do anything I was planning with Xipe later!''
''What were you planning?''
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...
...
''Just keep an eye on them!'' Angelique finished before holding the puzzle box and sending herself back into the Labyrinth, leaving the others in the school looking after two miss matched lovers. The others instantly felt feelings of disgust and nightmarish feelings watching these scenes, while Buster felt something else, something new. Seeing his love interest with his arch enemy brought about a new feeling in the pit of his stomach, one that he hasn't felt in any of his fics at all...jealousy.
Zeke's eyes widened in shock at the image in front of him ''Why are Lindsey and Pinhead kissing?''
Pinhead and Lindsey laid next to each other, each putting grapes into each other's mouths like lovers that have been lovers since Jesus's birthday parties. The others watched from afar; well Zeke was asleep, and Simon had a blindfold on, while Buster watched with his binoculars, doing his best to hide his increasing jealousy.
''Look at them, all nice and slushy together. Goggling at eachother like they really are in love, well they're not, and this shouldn't be happening at all. Pinhead isn't good enough for Lindsey!''
''Wow, someone's jealous'' Simon chuckled; this might not be so bad for him after all. This is one of those rare occasions he can make fun of his little brother without something coming back to hit him.
''I'M NOT JEALOUS!'' Buster screamed and uncontrollably sending chains flying everywhere almost hitting Simon as he moves out of the way, while Zeke sleeps through the whole thing.
''I hate to see what he's like when he is jealous'' Simon muttered under his breath.
Pinhead gulped down the last grape that Lindsey was feeding him; he then takes her hand in his ''Oh my love, have I ever told you how lucky I am to have you?''
''Only 29,543,859,289,801 times my sweet!'' She replied back.
''Then how about I tell you it again, but this time...in song!''
''WHAT?'' Buster shouted again. And before he knew it; Pinhead was now dressed in his best suit with a microphone in his hand. And in the background played the familiar music of Lion King's 'Can you feel the love tonight', and that's when Pinhead started singing...
''Can you feel the love tonight,
The peace the evening brings,
The world for once in perfect harmony,
With all its living things…''
The others just listened, slightly shocked by what was happening…not change that; very, very unbelievable shocked ''He's actually quite good!'' Simon praised.
''So! I can sing! Watch!'' Buster said before running off and getting his own microphone, and the music of JLS's 'Everybody in Love' started playing…
''Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
If you're in love, put your hands up,
You know you need someone,
When the need's so strong,
When they're gone you don't know how to go on,
So the whole world is stuck in a moment,
Standing still until they come back,
You accept that they've, got things to do,
But sometimes in the end there's nothing left for you…''
Buster was interrupted and squashed under a large canoe that Pinhead and Lindsey were riding, and soon the demon started his song again…
''So many things to tell her,
But how to make her see,
The truth about my past, impossible,
She'd turn away from me''.
And then Lindsey started singing after him…
''He's holding back, he's hiding,
But what, I can't decide,
Why won't he be the king I know he is?
The king I see inside?''
Buster emerged from the canoe; and once out he uses all of his chains to make a large disco ball, and tries his luck again…
''Every minutes like an hour,
Every hours like a day,
Every day lasts forever,
But what else am I gonna do,
I'd wait forever and a day for you,
I wait up, wait up,
I can't eat, I can't sleep, what else could it be,
missing you so deep,
long as I'm where you're going to,
I'd wait forever and a day for you,
I wait up, wait up for you…''
Buster then gets swarmed by an army of butterflies, and loses sight of everything. Pinhead and Lindsey stand in the middle, continuing their song together…
''Can you feel the love tonight?
The peace the evening brings,
The world, for once, in perfect harmony,
With all its living things.
Can you feel the love tonight?
You needn't look too far,
Stealing through the night's uncertainties,
Love is where they are''.
But Buster wasn't done yet; he made his way out of the swarm, and using his chains he starts swinging around the hall…and of course still singing…
''And even when we mad, and say we're through,
Deep inside you feel the same way I do,
Might as well turn around and just end this,
Cause it's harder trying to stay mad,
I could tell you that you can't stay here,
Knowing just as soon as you disappear,
That I'll be missing you baby,
Soon as you get up and you walk away,
Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
If you're in love, put your hands up…''
Buster landed back on the ground; all the chains he was swinging around on were shaped in the form of words 'I love Lindsey'. But it was no use, his song didn't help one bit as Pinhead and Lindsey were still cuddled up together. The boy plops down on the floor, face first in defeat.
''Oh Simon, I failed''.
''I knew you failed once you chose a JLS song!'' His elder brother replied.
''I might as well change my name to Why Bother; I can't fight against a potion. And besides, Lindsey looks happy, maybe this won't be so bad for her, what are they doing now?''
''Huh? Oh, Pinhead's proposing to her''.
''Oh that's nice…PROPOSING?'' Buster looked up and saw Pinhead on one knee with a ring in one hand and holding's Lindsey's hand with his other.
''My dear, would you do me the honor of marrying me?'' Pinhead asked.
Buster was left speechless ''Ma…ma…ma…ma…ma…ma…ma…'' And then his anger began to boil up again; not wanting another repeat, Simon ducks for cover just as Buster quite literally explodes ''THAT'S THE LAST STRAW! I DON'T CARE IF IT IS A POTION OR NOT, NOTHING'S GOING TO STOP ME FROM BRINGING LINDSEY BACK TO US!'' He marches over to the love doves.
''Lindsey, please listen to me. You don't feel anything for Pinhead, and he doesn't for you either. You're both undera spell, you have to fight it!''.
Lindsey looked at her friend with such sympathy; it looked like she might actually be fighting against the potion, but instead she says ''Oh Buster, you're so stressed; you can't be stressed on Valentine's Day. So that's why Pinhead and I went to the trouble of making more love potions for you and everyone'' And then she held up another bottle of the love potion.
''Ah, Lindsey wait, don't…'' But too late, Lindsey sprays the potion in Buster's face. His first reaction is too close his eyes, but he knows he'll open them eventually.
''Oh great, what do I do?''
And then the puzzle box went all static and took on different shapes, before Angelique emerged with another potion in her hand ''At last, now I have the potion that will separate to two of them, and bring Pinhead back into my waiting arms''.
Buster looked at Angelique ''Yeah, well done!''
Simon shouted ''Buster you idiot, you looked at her!''
…
…
…
''Whoops'' Was all Buster got out before falling head over heels for the demon princess at first sight ''Wow, you're so pretty!''
Angelique backed off ''Oh Leviathan, this can't be happening. Oh well, at least I can't fall in love with him…'' And then Pinhead walked in front of her, sprayed the potion in her face, and she saw the boy right after ''Oh Boy, give me some of that!'' She screamed before tackling Buster to the ground and making out.
Simon watched on repulsed by this act, but then he remembered it was happening to his brother ''Well, I guess if Buster ever was going to get with a girl, she would have to have been at a low standard'' He chuckled to himself.
Then Lindsey and Pinhead approached him ''Oh don't worry Simon, there's some for you'' She held the potion in his face, but Simon wasn't worried at all.
''What are you going to do, make me smell nice? There's no one else around for me'' He smiled in triumph. But that feeling left him when Lindsey signaled him to look to his left; he did so, and saw Chatterer standing there. His face darkened, and he began sweating and panicking at an almighty pace ''No, no, no, please Lindsey I'm begging you, don't do it!''
SPRAY! SPRAY!
(The following moments of Simon/Chatterer were deemed to explicit to be shown in a K+ rated fanfiction by the non-existing group, United Union of Things in Fanfiction that is Quite Wrong to be shown to People…or UUTFQWSP, for short)
With everyone now all fake loved up, Lindsey turns to Pinhead hugging him tightly ''Now, everyone can have a good Valentine's Day''.
''Indeed, but what about that one?'' Pinhead pointed towards Zeke, who was just waking up from his slumber. He looked around at all the love making around him, taking a moment before realizing what was going on; and when he did he was a little bewildered…well not a little but you know what I mean.
''What's going on? I've woken up in some alternate universe!''
''Zeke, we're already in an alternate universe, the holiday specials aren't cannon with the main story'' Pinhead told him.
''I know, because in this universe I'm…'' Zeke then ripped off his clothes to reveal underneath…a neat business suit ''Oops, wrong outfit'' He ripped this off to reveal another suit underneath; this one red, blue and yellow…the Superman costume.
But Lindsey and Pinhead just looked at him in confusion ''Who are you meant to be?''
''Oh, wait'' Zeke then curled the front of his hair a bit, leaving a large curl on his forehead.
''OH MY GOD, IT'S SUPERMAN!''
And then against all forms of physics, Zeke started flying across the room, and found that antidote that Angelique had just made ''This antidote will solve all of our problems'' And then he swallowed the bottle whole.
…
…
…
''Why did you just consume the antidote?'' Pinhead asked.
''Wait for it!'' Zeke replied. And then he started tensing his body, and crouched down on the ground. Veins were popping up against his skin, and his knuckles started cracking, he was up to something. On from the look of horror on Lindsey's face, she knew what it was. Pinhead looked at her as if to ask what this imbecile was doing; she leaned in and whispered in his ear, and that's when his face dropped ''Oh dear Leviathan!''
BOOM! Zeke let it all out in one atomic gas (literally) bomb; the gas went all around the hall, everyone in the room inhaling the fumes. They eyes stinging, and their noses wishing to close up. But within a few seconds, they faces turned from disgust to confusion…
''YUCK!'' Buster shouted and started brushing his teeth like there was no tomorrow ''Yuck, yuck, yuck, mouth of Angelique! Angelique coodies, yuck!''
Elsewhere, Nikoletta pushed Butterball off of her; he didn't really seem to stop even though he inhaled the antidote. Simon walked over to the others, his face still and emotionless ''I don't want anyone to ever mention this again!''
''ANGELIQUE!'' Pinhead's voice boomed towards Angelique's ear drums; she tried her best innocent face and politely waved, but it didn't ease Pinhead's mood one bit ''You dare tamper with the dark magic of love, and use it on me! You shall suffer greatly for this, forcing me to…indulge in human affairs with a…a…young speck of human innocence!''
''Hey Pinhead!'' Buster called. The demon turned and saw Buster holding the puzzle box in his hand, trying to work its magic ''That's my future wife you're talking about…'' He tried to solve the box, but it wasn't moving, and then he eventually realized ''Oh, I've got it upside down!''
''How can you have it upside down, it's a cube?'' Simon asked. Buster couldn't answer before he finally finished it, and in a blinding flash of light; all the Cenobites were sent back inside the puzzle box one at a time, with Pinhead and Angelique being the last. And they didn't enter the box before Pinhead shoots her a death glare to end all death glares, she was in big trouble.
''Well I'm glad that this chapter's finally over!'' Simon said.
Buster gently put the puzzle box in his back pack, which is kinda pointless because he'll still be looking for it in the main fic. And while he did this, Lindsey walked over to them; and they both stood there unsure of what to say to eachother at first, but then Lindsey finally started ''Did you really mean that, about future wife?''
''Well…um…I guess…I mean…I can't think of anyone else I'd rather be with!''
''Oh Buster, I've always dreamed that you'd say that…and it makes it more special that you said it on Valentine's Day!''
''Yeah, and boy was it exhausting, trying to win you back from Pinhead; who would have thought he was such a good singer''.
''I WAS WITH PINHEAD?'' Lindsey screamed and then started spitting on the ground ''Oh God, I think I'm going to be…'' She covers her mouth and then runs off to the bathroom.
''Maybe I shouldn't have said that'' Buster said to Zeke, who was now dressed back in his ordinary clothes.
''Hey buddy, at least you two are together now!''
''Together?'' Simon shouted ''This is an alternate reality fic, when we get back to the main one none of this would have happened. No love potion, no crazy love mix-ups, and no Zeke turning into Superman!''
''Me? Superman?'' Zeke laughed and then did his own Christopher Reeve impression ''Now Simon that's just silly, you've got such an active imagination!''
''Zeke, your shirt is still unbuttoned!''
Zeke looked down at his shirt, to see it was in fact unbuttoned with the Superman costume and logo clear for the world to see. Well, Buster knew this was one Valentine's Day they'll not forget for a long time…at least until the next chapter.
''You have disappointed me for the last time Angelique!'' Leviathan's voice so full of rage as the great big diamond in the sky looked down upon Angelique, forced to kneel and grovel before the Cenobite's great master ''To not only meddle with the arts of magic and sorcerer, but to then use it on your very own leader, is an act punishable by 50 years of torture!''
''I understand my lord'' She stressed out the last bit ''But I thought that this might be our chance to stop that boy from meddling in our affairs!''
''I assure you that this boy will pay for his crimes against the Labyrinth, the way we have always done!''
''Torture and pain?''
''What else?''
''Very well my lord'' She stressed the last bit out again, and then reached for something in her pocket ''But maybe it would be better if you treated us with a fair hand…like say...EAT LOVE POTION!'' She then sprays another bottle of the love potion towards the large diamond, and waits a few seconds for something to happen.
''Did you just try to use a love potion on me?''
…
…
…
''No''.
Buster: Hey wait a minute!
Rurrlock: What?
Buster: You forgot something!
Rurrlock: Ha, don't be silly, I'm the author I don't forget anything!
Buster: But what about the valentine's present I was getting Lindsey, the one Carrie was delievering?
Rurrlock: ...
(KNOCK! KNOCK! The others all turn to the door where Carrie was standing)
Carrie: Sorry, I waited until the chapter ended, there was no way I was going to get caught up in all that!
Simon: I thought you weren't in this chapter cause Rurrlock couldn't figure out what to do with you?
Rurrlock: Shut up!
Carrie: Anyway, I brought the present!
(Everyone gasps in surprise when Carrie opens the door to reveal a giant love heart made of chocolate!)
Lindsey: Oh wow, Buster you made this for me?
Buster: Of course!
(Zeke climbs on the chocolate heart)
Zeke: Hey Buster, is this made of solid chocolate!
Everyone: ZEKE, NO!
(Zeke takes a bite at the heart BOOM! And the whole world explodes in a chocolate flood. The group all swim in a river of chocolate)
Zeke: I guess that's a no
Buster: Well that's it for our Valentine's Day special, hope that you all enjoyed it! Have a great day everyone!