Nicki sat up in her bathroom, staring blankly down at the silver old fashioned razor that she had kept since she was a young teenager; she'd inherited it with some other things of her fathers. Not that she wanted any of it, that man disgusted her and it made her sick to call him her father. Nicki had drank two bottle of beer from the fridge, but she knew she was no were near drunk not even slightly tipsy. She just still felt lost, and alone. Tom's arguments from today had really hit her hard the words still going around in her head making everything feel like it was spinning. This was enough to make her bring the shining silver blade to her arm. She knew cutting the wrist would be too simple and would cause many questions if her shirt sleeves ridden up during working hours, so she lowered the metal and unbuttoned her shirt removing one arm, so that the upper part of her arm was bared. She just needed to feel pain, something to make her balance back with the world again. Something to make the words stop. She felt around the floor for the sharp razor and found it not too far away from her foot. She picked up the razor and lifted it back to her pale porcelain skin. Just as her shaking hand was about to make the first mark, she heard a knock on her front door. Growling Nicki placed the razor back in the cabinet, hastily shrugged on her shirt, and quickly buttoned it.
Racing down the stairs, and jumping of the third step down. Nicki walked calmly to the front door, she looked through the glass and could make the outline of a man. She looked at the clock hanging in her hallway, who would be calling at 10:30pm, Nicki walked towards the door checking to make sure the bat she kept in case needed was still within reaching distance of the door. She looked through the small glass peep hole in the door, her shoulders visibly dropped. You have to be kidding me, she slowly opened the door looking at Tom she grimaced open the door wider and walked back into her living room. Tom followed seeing this as an invitation to come into her home. Nicki sat slouched on the sofa, feet resting on the coffee table staring at her hands. She looked so small and lost.
Tom walked over to the sofa and sat next to her but not too close, Nicki didn't even look up from her hands. 'Nicki look I'm sorry. I've been tough on you the past few days, and it really isn't your fault. All those things I said, they were wrong, and I really didn't mean any of it. I was just frustrated because Josh rang me and he said that he missed a payment on his rent and he had spent all of his pay cheque on going out with work colleagues and I had to send a payment through to him to put him over till his next cheque.' Tom knew he was gushing all this out and some of it probably wasn't going to make sense but he wanted her to understand. No he needed her to understand.
Nicki turned her head to the side slightly and looked at him out the corner of her eye. 'Tom, you're babbling.' She couldn't help smiling slightly at him; Tom smiled back at her hoping that this was all fixed. 'Sorry.' Nicki shook her head 'it's okay Tom. Just forget about it all.' Tom let out a sigh of relief, if everything was fine though what was wrong with Nicki she still looked miserable. 'Well.' Tom bumped Nicki's shoulder with his, 'What's wrong then?' Tom smiled at Nicki. She smiled back at him but the smile didn't quiet reach her eyes. 'It's nothing really.'
Tom could tell that Nicki was lying but didn't want to push her, he knew what would happen if he pushed her. She would put her walls up and that would be it, he would be out the door before he even knew what was happening. Tom turned to Nicki, 'Mind if I quickly use your toilet. We can continue talking after that.' Nicki looked at him not all convinced about the continue talking when he came down would happen because she didn't want it to. 'Yeah sure, top of the stairs.' Once again the smile she gave Tom when she looked up at him, never reached her eyes.
What Nicki didn't know was when she placed the old razor in the cupboard; it had slid out and fell to the floor by the sink. Tom walked into the bathroom and when he pulled the rope to switch on the light, the first thing he saw was the razor glinting on the floor. Tom walked straight over to it and picked it up. Why? Why was this here? Tom walked down the stairs into the living room where Nicki now sat watching television. Nicki heard him coming in and turned the television onto mute, she turned towards him and her mouth opened in shock when she saw what he held in his hand.
'Nicki, why was this on the floor in the bathroom. It seemed slightly out of place, considering everything else is spotless.' Tom looked her straight in the eyes. He could tell she was about to lie to him, he could see the cogs turning in her head. He could see her just trying to think of an excuse good enough. 'I…I…just' she bowed her head she didn't know what to say. She didn't want to be honest with him, because he wouldn't understand. 'Nicki, the truth.' Tom gave her the stern look he gave misbehaving students, the look he had given her when they fought before. Nicki couldn't help it she backed away from him and tears welled up in her eyes, she didn't like him being angry at her and she just couldn't take this any longer. She ran at Tom grabbing the razor out of his hand, she ran straight up the stairs and into the bathroom where she turned the steal lock. She could hear Tom on the other side banging on the door demanding she opened it, begging her to open it.