Austin's POV

"Where are the pills? Where are they? The pills the doctor gave me! Were the hell are they?!" I screamed as I through out the bottles of medication, emptying out every single one, throwing them across the room. What a mess! Stupid me, never good at doing anything! What would Ally think? Would she be upset? Probably.

After calling Dez, I went to the bathroom and took out the razor, slashing madly at my wrists and stomach. Who gives a fuck if I disappear anyways?! Everyone would be happier if I left anyways, my parents could go to business meetings happily without having to worry about their son left alone at home. Who would care? No one! Everyone at school would go happily on with their days...like they give a fuck.

The liquid began flowing more and more out of my cuts, the feeling seemed to calm me, in a strange way. What...what's that black spot? More black spots everywhere...I'll just close my eyes and...rest.

Ally's POV

I fell to my knees, hand covering my gaping mouth, tears flowing out of my eyes nonstop. Blood was everywhere, Austin laid against his bathroom wall. A razor was in his hand, laying against the floor. I ran to check his pulse, weak but still there.

"Police Office please state your emergency"

"9801, Bullberry street."

"Calm down 'mam, what seems to be the emergency here?"

"My friend...lost...a lot of...blood."

"We're on our way 'mam."

The Police arrived shortly after, taking Austin on a stretcher to the closest hospital. Luckily Austin made it out alright, but they wanted me to talk to him the minute he woke up. So I did.

"Hey Alls." Austin smiled weakly, scratching the back of his neck. A tear fell down my cheek as I smiled back at him, sitting in a chair.

"Hey...how are you?"

"Who...me? I feel great, better than ever." Austin chuckled, looking down at his left arm and his smile quickly fell off his face. This must be so hard for him, one of his best friends finding out he self harms, I couldn't take all the pain, no way Jose. Someone as great as Austin shouldn't do something...then again anyone can self harm, even celebrities!

"Austin..."

"Go ahead, take me to the crazy farm but, I'm not going down without a fight."

"I would...never...do that to someone, especially a friend as great as you. You're not crazy Austin..."

"Then what am I?"

I leaned in closer to Austin, looking straight into his eyes. My heart began to pound faster and faster, I could see Austin's face getting red, mine began to feel hot.

"You...you are hurt, lost, confused, alone, in need...of a savior."

We leaned closer and closer together...

"Austin Moon?" A tall lady burst into the room, making us blush madly. She didn't seem to notice the moment...moment?! I was about to...what was I going to do?

"Yes?"

"The doctor says you can leave, but we are going to take you to the special room." the woman stopped a little before saying ''special''.

I shot out of my chair, angry. "No! He doesn't need to go in that stupid room! He's not a fucking lunatic! I can help me, give me a chance! Please."

"I'm sorry but-'' A doctor walked into the room and interrupted her and calmly said ''You may leave now. Thank you", and walked out of the room with the nurse behind him. Thank goodness! Now everything can go back to normal!

Austin's POV

Ally left after a few hours of me getting home, we talked for a while. But it was really awkward, will it be like this forever? Will she be scared or worried for me? I doubt it...she's probably scared of me. I'm just glad someone came looking for me, Dez didn't come though...that is strange. At least Ally promised not to tell my parents, that would be pretty hectic. It's just...really strange Dez didn't come looking for me. Maybe the call cut off before I even told him...who knows?

I flopped on my bed, it's 6 in the morning...and Monday. That sucks...I'm gonna skip today, a lot of stuff happened last night and...I don't think I could show my face to Ally...or Dez and Trish...or anyone really. Even if the only person that knows what happened is Ally, it'd still be pretty hard being in a classroom full of dirty looks. Everyone looking at me, in a dirty way. Thinking of me...how stupid and useless I am. Whatever, I don't give a fuck...I guess I'll go.

I got ready, its 8:00 now...I guess I'll go get Ally. I locked the door to the house and made my way to her apartment building. Ally...she...I wonder the pain she went through when she say me laying there...motionless. Did she even worry for me? Well of course, I did wake up in a hospital for God's sake. I...I'm sure she worried...even just a little bit. Yea...I should probably pick up my pace, oh...I'm already here.

"Austin...hey!" Ally walked cheerfully towards me, a smile plastered on her face...why is she so happy? Is she happy I suffered? Is she glad I went through that blood loss?

"I'm so glad you came! I thought I wasn't going to see you today!" she hugged me, I never want this to end. Her hug...my hands around her fragile waist...this feeling is so...happy. So beautiful, can feelings even be beautiful? Because if they can't...I'm going crazy.

"Yea...I didn't think I was gonna get out of bed but, here I am!" the last part came out more like a question, but I ignored it. We began to make our way towards school and ended up losing first period, Math. Eh, like it matters. Although, Ally seemed very sad that she missed her first period, History.

"See you later, Austin. Stay happy!" Ally cheerfully squealed and made her way to Spanish class, it was 5th period already.

"Bye!" I waved her goodbye, but she had turned around already so I did the same and made my way to English. Why do we need to take English class anyways? I know how to write and spell pretty well, my punctuation isn't to bad either but, whatever. I made it to class with minutes to spare, and decided to sit in the back corner because, no one ever looks there.

" , could you please come sit up front?" The sweet teacher cooed, oh shit! I can't no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no HELL no!

"Yes, ." I slowly got out of my seat and walked nervously to the front seat, the room was dead quiet and I swear I heard someone's pen drop. But I made it to my seat alive...at least I think.

Help...anybody! I can feel their evil eyes watching my every fucking move, it hurts. Their eyes following me, judging me and what I'm wearing, how I act, what I look like, what I listen to. What if they don't like it? What if they don't like...me? Just...stop watching me! Calm down Austin...you can fucking do this. "No you can't! You son of a bitch! You're a weak, worthless piece of shit! You couldn't even handle the fact that Dallas might like Ally! Worthless piece of shit!" I mentally screamed at myself. I'm losing my own battle, to myself!

My hands covered my ears, trying to block out the evil voice in my head. Maybe it's right, I am a worthless piece of shit that doesn't deserve happiness in my life. No! NO no no no no no! Ahhhhhh! Just stop looking at me! Stop judging me! PLEASE! I know I did wrong ok?!

"JUST STOP! PLEASE! STOP LOOKING AT ME! KEEP YOUR FUCKING EYES OFF OF ME!" I shouted at the class, tears threatening to fall down my cheeks.

"I KNOW I DID WRONG! JUST...I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!" I ran out of the classroom, and into the halls, hands over my ears and crying like an idiot. What a fool, how embarrassing.