HIIIIIII remember me? XD I've had major writers block and I have a job now so it's been crazy hard to write. Also I got a review that made some very good points about rape and how it's hard to be physical after you experience it. I considered rewriting the last few chapters but decided I would just kind of elaborate and make it a little justifiable. I hope it's okay. It may not make a lot of sense but it's the best I got for now c: enjoy~

Chapter 9

The bright but dim light shining through the windows, woke Roy from his deep sleep. He slowly sat up and stretched. His muscles were very sore and tender. He looked over and saw Ed asleep on the floor. What?

"Edo," he said softly.

Ed sat up and looked around. He was so gorgeous. His bare body, glistening with the afterglow of sex. He stood up slowly and crawled into bed.

"How'd that happen?" He mumbled.

"You move a lot love," Roy said kissing him softly.

Suddenly all his thoughts were consumed by the memories of the previous night. The kiss became more heated. Roy wrapped himself around Ed, pulling their bodies together tightly.

After a few breathless seconds Ed pulled away. He was blushing furiously. Roy smiled and hugged him close.

"Sorry Ed..I couldn't help myself," he said.

"I-it's alright, I just know we have to go to work and all," he said.

Roy sighed and stood. He looked down at his hardened member and grinned.

"A quick blowjob..?"

Ed laughed, "no, go get ready!"

Roy groaned and headed for the bathroom, his head hanging in defeat. He'd have to handle this little, well big, problem himself.

-later-

"God I'm exhausted," Ed said resting his head on the desk.

Roy smirked, "had a lot of strenuous activity last night."

Ed frowned, "shut up bastard."

Roy's smile faded, things had been on his mind all day. Things he didn't want to work out. Things he was afraid of.

Like..how Ed was so comfortable with the sex, and all the emotion, it seemed crazy. After all, he'd been raped, and tortured, how was he so calm? Sure it was difficult at first but once he got into it, it was easy. It was great, best sex Roy had ever had, but was he just being used by Ed to forget?

"Roy..?" Ed asked, breaking him out of thought.

"Yes?"

"Are you okay? You look a little deep in thought."

Roy swallowed, how could Ed see right through him. Should he be truthful? Either way he'd be hurting him.

"Oh..it's nothing," he said.

Ed was about to object when Riza burst in. She had a grimace and looked about ready to kill. Roy looked down and avoided her eyes.

"What can I do for you lieutenant?" He asked.

"You can explain to me why you haven't done your paperwork and also why I have Alphonse in my ear, worried about his brother," she said.

He didn't know what to say. Both of those situations were caused by he and Ed's relationship. He had totally forgotten the paperwork and it looked like Ed had forgotten his duties as a brother.

"Shit.." Ed mumbled.

Roy sighed, "I'm sorry..I got caught up last night."

"Doing what exactly?" Her glare sharpened.

"None of your goddamn business," he growled.

She hmphed, "Well isn't it convenient both you and Fullmetal were 'caught up' last night."

Roy looked down and blushed. They were going to have to tell her. Ed stood up and started for the door.

"Sit down Edward," Roy said.

Ed obeyed and sat on the couch. Roy walked over to him and sat next to him, grabbing his shaking hand. Ed squeezed hard.

"Yes, caught up together, in a whirlpool of emotions, confusion, and mayhem. But through it all I realized..how much I love him. Yes he's sixteen but I can't imagine my life without him. I've waited so long to find someone who'd accept me, someone who would deal with all my shit, I never realized he'd been right in front of me. All those years ago Hawkeye, seeing that fire that would never die out..I realized just how strong he was, how much he needed exactly what I did. Love." Roy paused and caressed Ed's tear soaked cheek.

"Through pain and torment, agony and loss, happiness and warmth, I'm never leaving him. He's what I've been looking for," he stood and looked her in the eyes.

"So I don't care what you say, nothing will change how I feel for this boy."

Roy looked down after he'd finished, and smiled at Ed softly. His emotions came pouring out and he realized how right it was. He held onto Ed's hand and laughed softly.

"W-wow.." Riza whispered.

They both looked up at her, she was smiling widely, "I'm so happy for you. I've never seen either of you so happy."

"It's because we never have been, with each other, there's happiness," Ed said.

"R-really brother?" Al asked walking in.

"H-how much did you hear Al..?" Ed asked.

"All of it..I'm sad you didn't tell me but I'm so happy for you," he said.

Ed smiled and hugged his armored brother, "thank you Al."

Everything felt right to Roy. He hoped it would last. He hoped with all he had left to hope.

-eeeeven later-

Roy pushed Ed onto the table. They had completely forgotten the dinner and found each others mouths instead. Ed squirmed desperately under Roy.

Roy smirked evilly, "fuck baby, you're so god damn delicious."

Ed bit his lip and blushed, "kiss me again Roy.."

The breathless whisper went straight to Roy's groin. He bent down and kissed his small lover again, his lips trailing down his slender neck. Roy licked to pulsing vein lightly and bit down.

Ed gasped and moaned, his hands clenching onto Roy's shirt. Roy took that as a good sign, so he bit harder, sucking on the flesh. He felt the younger stiffen almost automatically.

He stopped and looked down at the blonde. He had his eyes closed and his fists clenched to his sides. Roy sat up and pulled Ed with him.

"Edo?"

Ed visibly relaxed, "s-sorry."

"Tell me what's wrong?!" Roy asked hugging Ed to him.

"It's just that...the memories..are hard to forget," he said weakly.

Roy felt stupid, he shouldn't of been so rough. He was trying to help Ed forget the terrible things he'd been through. Then again..why was last night so different?

Ed could read his mind, "last night you were gentle, and I pushed, trying to forget, trying to fill you in my mind. To forget..him. And it worked, last night all I could think about was you. I liked that roughness, but..I'm scared," he said.

Roy sighed, "I wish I could erase it completely," he said as he put his shirt back on.

"With time you can. You help me forget. The very essence of you us calming. I don't know how I could do this without you. That's why I'm so glad it was you I ran into that night. You picked me up from the ashes and are dusting me off. Just give it time."

"Stop being so strong..you can cry every once in a while, nobody can keep it together forever."

As he finished he kissed Ed passionately. He moved his fingers into the blonde mess and massaged his scalp.

"Take all the time in the world, I'll wait forever. Put all your pain on me, I'll keep you safe."

They kissed again. Lasting a long time in each others embrace. Getting lost with their love.

"Smug bastard," Ed said giggling.

"Oh shut up little chibi!" Roy said tickling Ed.

They rolled around on the floor and laughed. They both felt better. It made sense that Ed wanted to forget and Roy knew he wasn't just a toy to the blonde but was sex really a solution to forget?

well..was it okay? I know it was short but this took me literally a month to write. I hope so..I'm dealing with a lot of shit and I just need some support. So review ok? And share this with your friends. Ineed a confidence booster. Thanks. Tragedy~