Dean opened his eyes and looked around the dark cabin forgetting for a moment where he was.

"Sam…Sammy?" Every time he woke up without his brother Dean called for him until his mind cleared and the grim circumstances came flooding back.

Dean felt the cold straight through to his bones; he went over to the stone fireplace and with a little effort got it blazing. Dean sat there with a beer leaning against the couch wondering how long it took a man to die in his condition.

The hunter fingered the pistol next to him and felt comforted, if it all got to be too much for him to take there was always a quicker way out.

Dean pulled out his phone; there were no bars. The light for the voicemail was blinking; he scrolled thought and saw they were all from Sam. Dean figured he could wait until tomorrow when he drove into town for more supplies and then see what his brother had to say.

A coughing fit wracked his body again; he didn't bother covering his mouth. The mist came out a darker red this time, it started out a pale pink when Dean first noticed but now the color was a countdown of sorts he watched with morose interest.

"It's not going to be all that much longer now."

…

Sam began searching; he dumped the stolen car and borrowed a truck from Freddie. He hit the small town leading up to the miles of forest bookending both sides; locals at the bar were willing to strike up a conversation with Sam. He was surprised they were so forthcoming with information.

He explained the circumstances laying it on thick and managed to pull up a few tears for them. The stocky old woman behind the bar named Lena was gruff but like most people she found a soft spot for Sam with the sad hazel eyes.

"There are all sorts of places up there, some nice tourist homes and others just cabins. Look for the chimney smoke and your sure to find your brother if he's up there. It's rough country and with the snow setting in soon he would be a fool to stay there in the winter without supplies. I hope you find him Sam."

He thanked her and left, now he had even more to worry about.

…

Dean got the water and heat going; after John died he kept up the maintenance just in case. In case of what he didn't know at the time but now the hunter was glad he did. Dean planned on using the fireplace to save on fuel just heating the place in the evenings when the temperature dropped enough to freeze the pipes. The days were still warm enough not to worry.

When Dean was done he sat outside on the wood pile enjoying the sunshine and wondered how much he would miss it when he was dead. There were a lot things he wondered about, would he end up in Heaven or Hell, would he be able to watch over Sam or was there only darkness waiting for him.

The only upside to it all was just maybe Dean would get to see Mary again but he didn't count on it.

Dean opened his wallet and pulled out a worn photo of Sam taken before he left for college. Sam had that look Dean called his bitch face but it didn't matter, he always thought his brother looked sweet even when he was sour.

"I miss you…I wish things were different Sammy I really do, I wish you could see past what you think is so bad and just see what's right but it's too late now." Dean wiped his eyes then headed back inside careful to walk slowly so he didn't over exert himself.

Dean made it to the porch then clutched his chest. His heart labored as he climbed the steps, thumping so loud Dean thought ever creature in the woods could hear it.

….

Benny had caught a scent and then lost it again as he drove the stolen truck through the rough roads if they could even be called that. They were more or less rutted trails, the truck bounced along as the vampire kept his nose in the breeze coming through the open window.

He slammed on the brakes and put the truck in park; Benny jumped out and trailed his nose through the air.

Benny bared his teeth as the heavy scent of blood filled his nostrils, "Dean I've got you now."

….

Sam kept checking his phone but there were no message from Dean, he tried his brother's again but the voice mail was still full. After hours of searching in the wrong direction he gave up and went into a little diner open in town. He ordered then spread the map out on the table marking off where he already searched.

There was nothing but empty cabins and miles more to check, Sam didn't even know if his brother actually came here or if he had been jerking Sam's chain.

The young guy serving him put down the food and held up the coffee, refill?"

"Yeah…hey you live around here, have you ever heard of the name Winchester?"

He looked around the empty restaurant then sat down and tapped the map, "Why, is that the person you're looking for?"

"My brother is missing and really sick, I have to find him fast. Our father might have had a hunting cabin we didn't know about, his name was John."

The server yelled, "Hey mom, do you know a John Winchester?"

She walked out wiping her hands on a towel; she narrowed her eyes, suspicious of the young man with her son, "Why…who wants to know?"

That was when Sam knew he found one of the many women John had screwed over literally and figuratively.

….

Benny parked the truck a few miles away knowing Dean might be dangerous even to him. The vampire hiked in, he found the cabin with the scent of Dean's blood and smoke coming out of the chimney. He opened the door surprised it wasn't locked.

"Dean its Benny don't whack me."

"What do you want Benny?"

Benny looked around the room and spotted Dean in the bedroom door holding a machete, "Are you going to kill me with that?"

Dean put it down and dropped his head, "I'd never kill you Benny."

Benny hurried over and grabbed him, Dean collapsed in his arms and started to cry, "Hey it's ok, I'm here for you brother."

He pressed his lips to the pulse on the hunter's neck and felt how weak it was; Benny picked him up and carried Dean to the bed putting him down gently. "Dean stay right here, I got to hike back and get my truck."

….

Trina sat next to her son and listened while Sam gave her an overview. She shook her head, "So that piece of shit was your father? I feel sorry for you and your brother."

Her son whispered, "Mom don't say that."

"It's true Seth! He left me with bills and a bunch of heartache. Sam if you're looking for that cabin of his I might have an idea. You've been looking in the wrong place." She pointed on the map, "I remember him bringing me here in this area when we…you know."

She looked out the window at the darkness settling in, "Don't go out there now, you're gonna get lost, in the morning things will be better, you can have a big breakfast and spend the day searching. Besides if Dean has a fire going you can spot it easier."

Sam nodded, "Alright, is there a place to stay around here?"

…

Benny came back in and stoked the fire then looked at the food situation; he heated Dean up a can of stew and brought it in, "Dean, wake up you have to eat."

He opened his eyes at the sound of the vampire's voice, "Why?"

Benny made him sit up and lean against his chest, "Do it for me."

Dean took the spoon and brought some of it to his mouth and then dropped it, "I can't even feed myself anymore." When Benny tried to help he snapped, "No I can do it, give me minute alright?"

Dean steadied himself and tried again this time succeeding, Benny gave him a kiss on the cheek, "There you go, see you can do it Dean."

"Oh my god, are you going to start talking to me like a fucking baby?"

"Sorry darlin' I'm just trying to help you."

The vampire nuzzled the damp skin on his neck, "I missed you, Dean could I stay, I won't be a bother."

If Benny had a heart that worked it would have been breaking, he was overcome with a wave of love so strong he thought he might just die all over again.

When Dean said he could stay the night Benny made the decision to turn him if Dean wanted it or not.

….

Sam laid there staring at the ceiling, without Dean there beside him there wasn't much else to do. Sam thought about everything he wanted to say to his brother.

The first thing he would say was how much he loved him and wished all those times Dean cried Sam had hugged him and gave the comfort he needed.

There were so many things over the years Sam felt he needed to be forgiven for but he worried it was too little too late.

…

Benny cranked up the heat and gave Dean a bath, He kneeled next to the tub talking to the hunter softly about silly things making Dean laugh despite his circumstances.

He wheezed as he spoke, "Stop it Benny I'm trying to be miserable and your ruining it."

"Well that's what I'm here for, to ruin your bad mood." He shampooed Deans close cropped hair that was actually getting a bit shaggy, "You need a haircut; I'm not turned on by chick hair like…" He stopped himself.

"You mean like Sam's?"

"I didn't mean to bring him up. Dean you know I'd do anything for you right?"

"Benny you don't owe me anything, you found the way out."

"I know Dean but you gave me the ride out and kept your word. Remember what we had there, I was lost until you came to me. Laying there together in a cave listening to the wild sounds, your arms around me was romantic in a way."

When Dean didn't answer Benny changed the subject, "Anyway Dean your turning into a prune let me help you out."

Dean hung onto him as Benny toweled his body, he had lost weight the past few months but Sam didn't seem to notice. Benny did but he didn't mention it, the feel of Dean's hip bones was jarring to the vampire.

He had changed the sheets with ones not so musty and helped Dean into bed then stripped and crawled in next to him. As he kissed Deans neck the hunter protested weakly, "Benny I can't, I'm too sick."

"It's all good baby I'll do everything and if nothing happens I'm fine with that. We can just rest together; will you let me enjoy you?"

Dean didn't have any fight left inside of him to say no, "Alright."

Benny worked a trail down Dean's body stopping to take in a nipple then continuing until he hit the hollow of a hip. He felt his friend tremble, "Are you ok Dean?"

Dean gasped, "Yeah…ok."

Benny nuzzled between the slim legs nipping and sucking, taking it all in and more. He pushed Dean's legs open and held them while probing his ass gently with his tongue. Benny kissed him there and then went back to rest with Dean.

Dean would never admit it but he was happy the vampire found him, being alone was frightening and all his bravado left as soon as those familiar arms surrounded him again.

He rubbed his cheek on the strong, broad chest and closed his eyes, "I don't want to die." Then Dean began to sob and couldn't stop he had wanted to, "I don't want to die Benny…I can't leave Sam."

He began to cough so hard that large droplets covered the vampires chest, Benny pulled him up and rested Dean on a pillow.

"Dean I won't let you die."

This time Dean didn't argue, he let Benny take control and made the choice for him. The vampire bit his own wrist open and pressed it to Dean's mouth. When the hunter closed his eyes and began sucking slowly Benny smiled. Dean accepted it and chose to go on.

…..

Sam woke early, ate quickly at the diner then headed for the area the woman had pointed out on the map. He had a full tank of gas and a whole day ahead of him to find his brother and right all the wrongs both real and imagined.

…

Dean opened his eyes the next morning and looked out the window, he felt different. Every sense was heightened, he swore he could hear the beating heart of a mouse in the wall behind him. He looked over at the vampire next to him; Dean saw the wound on his wrist and bent down to kiss it.

Benny opened his eyes and smiled, "Welcome to my world, how do you feel?"

Dean sat up and rubbed his chest, "I don't hurt now but I'm hungry…what can I do? I can't just kill someone."

Benny got up and dressed then watched out the window, he sensed someone was coming. "You can kill the refuse, the truly bad people Dean. Otherwise you can just feed a little to keep going. I have a suggestion but you might not like it."

"What is it?"

"If you find a human willing you can drink from them, the transformation is irreversible once you partake. Maybe Sam will be that human, you can be with him Dean. A symbiotic relationship…Sam gets you, you get blood and Sam. If you're out hunting and right person comes along, someone deserving of a deep six then drink your fill."

"Sam doesn't know where I am and I'm not putting this burden at his feet."

Benny watched the truck bounce up the rutted road and stop next to the Impala, "I guess you can ask him yourself, Dean if you don't feed for the first time then I'm sorry brother, but you're going to die anyway."

….

When Sam spotted the Impala he felt a sense of relief, now he had Dean and they could figure it all out. He pulled in but then hesitated as he left the vehicle, Dean sick or not was dangerous and Sam didn't know if he would want to see him or not.

Sam looked at the other truck parked there and his gut told him it was Benny. Sam grabbed his gun and the machete then stalked toward the cabin, Benny stepped onto the porch and raised his hands, "Sam, just hear me out."

Sam squared his shoulders and pointed the machete at the vampire, "Fuck you Benny I'm sick of you after my brother's ass! I swear if you hurt him…"

Dean step out and stood in front of Benny, "Sam stop."

"Get away from him Dean, I'm ending this. I cut him slack and tried to like him but I can't stand Benny touching you, it makes me sick. You let that monster paw your body like you're his bitch."

Dean didn't budge, "So you don't want me Sam but I can't have anyone else...I'm supposed to be alone while you fuck bar trash and pretend it's me you got bent over a dumpster?"

Sam took a step forward, "I said move Dean we can talk this out after I take care of him."

"Go screw that bitch vet Amelia, go sit in the park and have birthday cake and play Frisbee with that dog you had stinking up my car while I rotted in purgatory you prick…yeah that's right I remember every story you shoved down my throat after I got back."

Sam lowered the machete and stopped moving toward them, "Make him leave Dean, I can't talk this way."

Dean turned to Benny and gingerly ran his fingers over the stubble on the vampire's face, "Babe you should go now, I have to talk to Sam. If I don't try Benny I'll regret it."

Benny rested his forehead against his lovers, "Dean I should stay until you tell him. You need blood soon …what if Sam rejects you? I could bring someone and let you feed."

Dean looked back at his brother then to his maker, "If Sam rejects me then I imagine that big ass machete he's holding is going to come into play at some point. I won't hurt him Benny not even to defend myself. Go and trust everything will be ok. If I survive I'll get a message to you."

Benny's blue eyes were filled with tears, "Dean you know I always loved you right?"

Dean lowered his eyes, "I know, I love you too; if things were different I swear I'd be with you. I owe you everything and I gave nothing back."

Dean heard his brother call softly to him, "Dean, talk to me."

Benny grabbed his face and kissed him hard, "You're wrong Dean you gave me everything." Benny walked past Sam, got in the truck and left.

The vampire knew there was no point in staying, Dean made his choice and Benny couldn't compete with a love like that.

TBC