Chapter Six: Moving Forward

Leaving her brother and Tris in the training room with that unsettling question in mind, Lilla made her way slowly into the mess hall. She wasn't even sure she wanted to have dinner with Zeke and Uriah, but better a quiet meal with them than a noisy one with all of Dauntless. Her friend was waiting for her at the entrance, and whisked her off before she even saw the others.

The walk up to Zeke's apartment was long and jarring. Most of all, it was painful. She found Uriah's hand steadying her by her elbow more than once, much to her chagrin. She couldn't be seen as weak!

"Come on, Mouse," Uriah encouraged as they approached his brother's apartment, "just a bit further." He was worried – more than worried, terrified – for his friend by now. Being merely worried had died at the first look he'd gotten at her as she came towards him in the mess. The look on her face could only be termed… despair. What had happened? He resolved to tackle that problem just as soon as her physical ailments were taken care of.

"Open up, Zeke!" he called, banging on the black door. His older brother answered quickly, and with a smile, but there was a tension to it that belied his easy manner.

"Hey Bro. Mouse," he greeted, opening the door further for them to enter. It had been decided earlier that he'd be the one to force Lilla into the open with her secrets. If it was him, and not Uriah, she couldn't fight back quite as effectively. And if it was him, his brother wouldn't lose his new-found best friend.

So, as the two younger Dauntless walked through his door, he geared himself up to do what had to be done.

"So how was knife throwing, Mouse?" he asked with a forced grin, "I heard you made a pretty good showing!" Then, as if congratulating her, he gave her a solid smack, right to the spot between her shoulder blades.

Lilla felt his hand connect with her torn skin, forcing a shrill cry through her clenched lips. The edges of her vision went red, then blackened a bit, and she stumbled forward. Steadying hands caught her as she fell, and Uriah went willingly to the hard floor with her, making sure she didn't harm herself further.

"Oh, Lilla," he sighed, guiding her body to collapse semi-gracefully into his lap. There were tears streaming from her grey-blue eyes, which were shut tight in agony. The fires of hell felt like they were ripping over her inflamed, infected back.

"What's happened?" Zeke asked, though he knew the answer. He wanted to give her the chance to have some control over the situation, but knew that if she was anything like her elder sibling, there would be no easy resolution.

"S-sorry," Lilla gasped, trying desperately to pull away from her friend's too-warm hands. They quickly went from reassuring to restraining.

"Stay still, Mouse," Uriah whispered, holding her small, pale hands as she struggled weakly.

"Let me go!"

"We can't do that," Zeke said. "We need to know what's wrong."

"No," she snapped, fighting more desperately, but to no avail. "No, I'm fine!" She couldn't let them know. They would tell the others, tell Tobias. Tobias couldn't know! "I'm fine, now let me go!" It was the loudest anyone had heard her sweet soprano in a long time, but there was still a shrill, agonized edge to it.

"Shhh," Uriah said, rubbing one thumb back and forth over her palm, though he didn't loosen his iron grip on her hands. "It's alright Mouse. We just want to help."

"I'm going to check your back, Lilla," Zeke added, crouching down beside his brother and the girl he'd heard so much of from Four that he felt as if she was his own little sister. "I need to see."

"Please don't," Lilla gasped, trying to wriggle out of the way. Between the illness creeping up on her from the infection, the lack of sleep and surplus of stress she'd had over the past few days, and the burning pain from Zeke's hand, she was in no shape to fight their ministrations.

In due course, her loose black shirt was twitched gently up over her head, revealing the vilest wounds either of the boys had ever seen. They'd seen training wounds before and Dauntless became well acquainted with injury from a young age; it was in their nature as daredevils. Zeke had even seen some pretty terrible wounds inflicted by someone trying their hardest to do harm in his time as a city guard, but not like this. This… this was systematic torture. And to find it on a pale, skinny sixteen year old girl from Abnegation, of all people… Well, it was unsettling at a level he didn't ever want to experience again.

Lines of gaping tears in Lilla's flesh crossed one over another all the way down her back. Some of the wounds were shinier than others; burns, the boys recognized, feeling ill. All were red, and weeping in a way that spoke of nothing good. The sheer number was overwhelming. What was almost worse was the web work of older injuries, most half-healed, beneath the fresher ones. And beneath that was a story of years of pain and neglect written in white lines of scar tissue, thick and thin, that seemed to cover more of her back than she had visible skin.

"Holy shit!" Uriah thundered. As soon as her shirt had been lifted, Lilla had let all the fight go out of her. She simply didn't have the energy to keep fighting when she knew she was beaten. They'd already seen more than she could ever explain away.

"I'm going to unclasp your bra, Lilla," Zeke said softly, speaking again before making any motion, afraid to startle the girl. "Just stay still and we'll get you fixed up soon." She said nothing in response, reverting quickly to her customary silence in the face of this new horror.

Would she be sent packing? Surely Eric, along with many of her fellow Initiates, would love to see her Factionless for this weakness. What would her brother do, if that happened? Would he even let her say goodbye? She hadn't been able to the last time they were separated.

"It will be okay, Mouse," the younger brother whispered, still stroking Lilla's now entirely slack hand with his own calloused one. "The Erudite medicine will get you feeling better in no time."

"And if I'm cut because I can't keep up?" she spat bitterly.

"You won't be cut," Zeke assured her. "My brother and I will fix you up tonight, and you will already be feeling a bit better by morning. If anything, you will improve in training once you are healed up some."

"But the leaders…"

"Don't need to know about this," Uriah interrupted. "That's why we're doing it, rather than taking you to the infirmary. Now let's get you up on the bed for this."

"You… but… why?"

"Because you need this. And because it is the right thing to do," Zeke replied to her bewildered question.

"Your back is infected, Lilla," Uriah added. "It will only get worse if it's not treated."

"I don't understand…."

"You are my friend. That's why," he replied, getting a little frustrated.

"You've known me for three days, Uriah," Lilla argued.

"Yes, and that's enough to know you are my friend. Now come on, and let Zeke take care of your back."

"But how did you know?"

"It doesn't matter," Zeke answered before his brother could give away Four's involvement. "We do, and we won't tell anyone. On the condition that you let us help you. I don't know how you've been training at all like this."

"I… Thank you… Thank you both." Lilla was too tired and ill to continue arguing, to press for answers. It wasn't as if they were doing harm with the information they'd gathered, however they had gathered it. So, she laid quietly on Zeke's bed as he and Uriah gently began to clean the cuts and burns on her back one at a time. Soon enough, she was drifting mentally as the boys worked, and before she knew it, they were done and wrapping a bandage over her injuries.

She began to stand, but was immediately halted by a firm, gentle hand on her upper arm keeping her where she was.

"You stay here tonight, Mouse," Uriah informed her in a tone that brooked no argument.

"I can't!"

"You can. There are no rules that say when Initiates have to be in bed. So tonight you stay right where you are while those creams work, and in the morning you can go to breakfast and training as normal."

"And how will I explain that?!"

"Tell them you dozed off sitting in a hall somewhere for quiet."

Lilla wasn't sure if she should be worried that her friend could come up with a lie that quickly, but either way it was one that would work. And he was Dauntless-born, not Candor.

"I don't want to take your bed."

"It's fine. I have a couch and Uriah can take the floor with some extra blankets," Zeke replied firmly, his tone – like his brother's – brooking no argument.

Uriah sat in silence for a while, making his brother a bit nervous. Zeke knew that silence was never a natural state for the younger man. In fact, it wasn't something he'd ever seen before, not this completely anyway. While Uriah watched Lilla, Zeke watched Uriah.

"She'll be okay now," he finally said, bringing his brother's eyes away from their point of focus for only a second.

"Yeah."

"You did all you could. We all did," Zeke tried to reassure him.

"I know."

The short answers were abnormal and very disconcerting coming from the normally talkative young man, but the elder brother wasn't sure how to break him out of this shock.

"Talk to me, man," he urged after another long moment.

"She's… I don't know, bro," Uriah sighed, dropping his dark head into his hands, elbows on his knees. He presented a perfect picture of confused dejection. "How did she even start training like that?" he wanted to know, rambling now that the dam was broken. "Her back is in ribbons! How can a father do that to his child!? How can anyone justify this!? The scars, Zeke… She's been beaten – tortured – for years. And Four left her there."

"He left because it was the only way either of them could ever get out. If he'd stayed, she would have too. You know that, Uriah," Zeke replied, laying a large hand on his younger brother's shoulder. "If he'd stayed, neither of them would be here now. She'd still be trapped in Abnegation with that monster."

Uriah ran a shaky hand over his close-cropped hair tiredly. He knew the older boy was right… but that didn't seem to lessen the raw fury he felt at the moment.

"She was trapped with that monster alone for two years while he soared through Initiation and straight into a cushy job in intelligence. She's here now, but those scars are never going to go away! And what else has he had the chance to do to her, trapped in that silent, concrete cage that Abnegation lives in?" He was working himself into a fine rant now, but Zeke was a little relieved to be getting the expected reaction. "How long has she been told that she deserved that?" he spat, "I overheard you and Four talking once. 'This is for your own good,' that's what he used to tell them, right? And what do you think that bastard did when one of his punching bags got out? He turned his rage on the other, on Lilla; I'll guaran-damn-tee it!"

"Quiet, bro. She needs to rest," Zeke cautioned, wanting to let his brother get it out, but needing their patient to sleep too.

"How is she going to survive here, Zeke?" Uriah demanded desperately, his eyes finally leaving Lilla's still form to meet the other dark gaze. "She left violence to come to more of it. What was she thinking?"

"That's what Four is worried about too. I'm not though. Yeah, we're a rough bunch," the older one agreed, "but here she can fight back. Here she can learn to defend herself against the violence, and be rewarded for doing so. Back there, if she fought back, she just got beat worse. I know what Four went through, and it was easily just as bad for Lilla; worse probably, these past two years. Here, though… Here she can win."

Eric wasn't normally one to have trouble sleeping. He usually worked so hard during the day, and kept up his training so hard in the evening, that he was far too exhausted to even think by the time he crashed into his bed at night. Which was the trick to getting to sleep; not thinking. His mind was one that never turned off, always whirling in one direction or another. And there was much he didn't want to think about.

This night, however, he was awake. Insomnia a rare problem for the Dauntless leader, he finally got frustrated with trying to sleep, and slipped out of his room with a silence only a trained killer could achieve. He didn't know where he was going, just that he would start breaking things if he stayed in that room. It was a nice apartment, nicer than the ones for the normal members, but it was dark and suddenly felt oppressive, and was not helping his turbulent thoughts in the least.

The worst part was that Eric wasn't even sure what the thoughts were that were keeping him up at all hours. Was it the continuing rivalry with Four? That was part of it. Max wanted to offer his rival a position as a leader. Four had always turned him down, but that wouldn't last. Eric knew he would have to fight to stay on top. That was how Dauntless worked. You fight for every breath, every step, every small joy. Sometimes he wondered if he should have stayed in Erudite. He was smart enough – had always been top of his class, in fact – but knowledge without action was boring. At sixteen he'd wanted to do something. Anything, really, that would give him some sort of action. By seventeen, he was contentedly placed as a leader of the Faction that favored action over everything else. But the rivalry wasn't all of it; he just didn't know what the rest was.

Instead of stewing in his thoughts any longer, Eric decided to walk. Maybe some time in the Pit would settle him. He already had too many piercings in his face, although he did enjoy the intimidating look they gave him. So that was out… but a new tattoo was an idea. It would give him something to focus on for a while, and then he could go back to bed.

With that idea in mind, the domineering young man set out for the Pit, where he knew the tattoo shop would be open, despite the hour. The winding paths from the living quarters down to the Pit were steep and narrow, and most had no rails. It was an experience, just getting from one place to another; one he relished.

On the way, he rounded a corner, only to draw up short at an odd sight. Standing in front of him, leaning on one of the few rails in the compound, was the Abnegation fluff. Lilla, his mind supplied once more.

"What are you doing here, Initiate!?" he growled, and much to his pleasure, she jumped and whirled to face him, eyes a bit wider than normal. It was the first time he'd gotten the reaction from the chit he was looking for. And it was satisfying.

"Nothing," Lilla replied evenly, catching her breath quickly. Eric had startled her. She was on edge, having slipped out of Zeke's room once both boys were sound asleep. The creams they'd applied had already started working to lessen her pain, and she was restless. The young leader met her innocent stare with a fierce glare, disbelief clear in his eyes.

"I won't ask again, girl."

"The answer remains the same. I am doing nothing but standing here."

"Why?" Eric demanded. He was irritated by this entirely unwelcome interruption to his late night solitude. The last thing he wanted to deal with was the girl who had him so damn confused! And, though he'd managed to startle her this once, the speed with which she'd regained her composure was unheard of. She should not have this little fear of him. Every other Initiate – hell, most full members even – were absolutely terrified by his imposing presence. So why was this one little girl so completely unafraid?

"It seemed like a good idea."

Eric snarled down at her, taking one menacing step forward. Lilla didn't back down, simply gazed back at him impassively as he bore down on her. His muscular frame was intimidating, and his dark eyes glared coldly enough to freeze, but she just couldn't summon the energy to fear him. One harsh, calloused hand reached out to grip her chin painfully between two large, solid fingers, forcing her face upward. As Eric stared down into her pale, piercing eyes, he realized something he hadn't seen before. There was something there, hidden deep in the depths of her cool façade. It wasn't fear, as he'd like it to be, but it was there, something dark…

"Be careful," Eric hissed, "No one would much care if one little piece of Abnegation fluff went soaring over the rail, and I would take great pleasure in watching that cool attitude of yours morph into terror as you fell." To his aggravation, her expression didn't change. With a rough shove, he sent Lilla stumbling back into the rail behind her. The impact to her back hurt, despite the healing creams already working, and it drew a gasp unwillingly from the Initiate, who hunched over instinctually to brace herself against the pain.

Eric sneered down at her, his strong jaw clenched and full lips twisted into a cruel smirk. It couldn't have hurt that bad, he thought. If her pain tolerance was so low that a little shove made her gasp out like that, he was going to enjoy watching her attempts at fighting the next day. She was going to be flattened. The thought didn't stir the same savage pleasure that he would have expected though. Didn't he want to see the cool little chit be taken down a few pegs? Yes, but, then again, he wanted to be the one to do it himself.

"If you were smart, girl, you'd know when you're beaten. People fear me for a reason," he growled in warning, pressing forward another threatening step when she all too quickly straightened her spine and stood defiantly firm again under his merciless gaze. Did she have no sense of self-preservation at all?

"I don't think I ever claimed intelligence as one of my more prominent traits," Lilla replied, wondering at her own boldness when it came to the intimidating man in front of her. She knew quite well that he could hurt her, probably worse than Marcus ever could have even dreamed of, and she suspected he would enjoy doing so… so why wasn't she frightened? Was it because she'd spent so long in fear, that she'd become desensitized? Or was it – and this sounded more than mildly absurd, even in her own mind – because she knew on some level that he wouldn't?

Eric watched Lilla's thin, elfin face like a hawk for a long, tense moment. He was the clear predator, and she the chosen prey, but this prey seemed stubbornly defiant to the lurking danger. Even with his warning just given, she answered with sarcasm. Was she really that stupid? With a snarl, Eric raised one hand, intending to backhand her for her insolence. He was a leader, and he would have her respect.

Lilla saw the hand poised to strike, and flinched.

It was only slight, and if he hadn't been watching her so closely, he never would have seen it, but her grey eyes widened, pupils dilated, her head ducked slightly, and her shoulders hunched. Despite all that, she didn't even try to move out of the way of the incoming blow. What the freaking hell? What Dauntless didn't even try to fight back at such a threat? She'd reacted with cool impassivity every time he'd insulted or berated her. She had shown no fear when he singled her out in training, when he forced her to strike at him and invaded her personal space at every opportunity. Hell, she had barely even reacted when he all by strangled her! This was what it took to get the frightened reaction he was looking for? An open hand raised in threat? It made no sense, convoluting the puzzle that this irritating little Initiate presented even further.

With an assessing, curious look – one he concealed with a falsely satisfied smirk – Eric slowly lowered his hand. He wasn't even sure himself why he didn't follow through on the threat. He'd fully intended to do so, when he raised his hand to slap her; he wanted to teach her a lesson about curbing that attitude of hers. But now that he had the fear from her, however small it was, he found it… strangely unsettling. If she'd reacted to any of his other threats with fear, he thought that this one flinch wouldn't have fazed him like this, but she hadn't. She'd shown him no fear, except with this small gesture, and it was utterly confusing. That mildly panicked look he'd seen for the briefest second in her wide eyes just didn't belong. He found that he didn't like it there, and that was even more confusing than her unusual reaction. What was this little fluff doing to him?

The former Erudite didn't like to be confused, especially about himself. He'd spent a long time developing his self-awareness, his intimidating, respect-commanding demeanor. And he didn't like things to be unpredictable, which was exactly what this particular irritant of a girl was proving to be.

Lilla, for her part, cursed herself for reacting at all, especially under the gaze of her least favorite instructor. Even Four's now frigid gaze – one she'd at one time never thought she'd see directed at her – would have been preferable. Of all people to see her momentary weakness, why did it have to be the one person who could, and almost certainly would, use it to the best of his ability against her?

"What the hell was that, Stiff?" Eric demanded in that low, rumbling tone of his. It was one calculated to be commanding. He expected prompt answers to his questions. Always.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Lilla answered in a monotone. Eric considered actually slapping her this time, rather than lowering his hand at the last second. But she was ready for the repeated threat, and managed just barely to contain the ingrained reaction when he raised his hand again. For the most part, at least. She couldn't help the increase in heart rate, which Eric could see at her pulse point, just under her impossibly pale skin. Not so impassive after all, he thought.

Instead of letting his hard hand fall across her face, he rested it once again on her neck, pressing lightly. The feel of her racing pulse under his palm was oddly invigorating. He was pleased that he was finally getting some reaction out of her. Although he wasn't so sure that he was satisfied with what reaction it was. While he'd expected her fear to be sweet once he had it, he now couldn't quite sort out whether or not it was really what he wanted. Despite the conflicted thoughts, he leaned in until his lips were directly next to her small ear. Lilla could feel Eric's warm breath against her neck as he spoke, and she couldn't help the shiver that raced down her spine.

"Don't lie to me, little girl," he all but hissed the words, "This is your last warning to tread carefully. I repeat: people fear me for a reason." With a final firm squeeze to her slender throat, he stepped back and crossed his arms, standing in that same menacing stance he favored most of the time, looming over her despite the increased space between them. "Now why did you flinch?"

"Most people flinch when they are going to be hit and can't reasonably fight back," Lilla deflected. Half-truths and deflections were second nature to her. It was the only way to survive in the Eaton household. "You are a leader and I'd rather be beaten than out on my ass. If you are going to hit me, hit me. I can take a few blows," she finished with a nonchalant shrug, tilting her chin defiantly once more.

Once again, Eric found himself surprised by the little chit, a state he was quickly growing to loathe. He wasn't sure which was braver: being willing to fight back against someone who could kick you out, or to take a beating in order to keep that someone from doing so… Either way, she fit the bill. She'd been fighting back against his bullying subtly ever since she'd come, and now she was willing to just stand there while he hit her. If he was being honest, if only with himself, he didn't have a specific reason for baiting her the way he had. She just got under his skin, a burr to irritate and inflame. She was an enigma, a twisted little puzzle, and he had always enjoyed puzzles; even the frustrating, infuriating, hard to solve ones. Those, he decided were the most challenging. And therefore the best.

Lilla watched Eric's lips twitch into a slight smirk. It had the effect, surprisingly enough, of softening his features just a bit. It wasn't the same vicious smirk he'd given her before, but one of what seemed to be genuine amusement. At least, she was pretty sure that was the case. It was hard to really tell for certain. Without the menacing glare, she realized that – despite too many piercings – he wasn't all that bad looking. His strong jaw and sharp features were actually rather appealing, and his dark hair and eyes contrasted nicely with slightly bronzed skin. Shaking off the odd thoughts, she continued to meet his now curious gaze with an impassive look.

"You have no sense of danger at all, do you?" he inquired, not sounding nearly as frightening as he had a moment before.

"Very little," Lilla replied seriously. It was true enough. She simply didn't have the energy to be afraid of the things most other people considered dangerous. Her attention had always been on the real danger to herself and her brother: their father. The rest was all just background noise.

"That will serve you well here," Eric said, his lips twitching even further, "but if you continue to test my patience, it will run out." His look and tone turned darker. "That's not something you want, little girl."

Lilla said nothing, but conceded the point with a curt nod.

"Go get some sleep. Your first fight is tomorrow," the imposing leader ordered, then stalked away without another word, both frustrated and amused by the girl he left behind him. Breathing a sigh of relief, said girl wasted no time in hurrying back to Zeke's apartment.

She was careful to stay quiet as she slipped back into the large bed, still feeling a little guilty about taking it from its owner. It wasn't long before she'd drifted back into sleep, exhausted from the small burst of adrenaline that dealing with Eric had brought on. She slept through until morning, much to her surprise.

Meanwhile, Eric did not return immediately to his own apartment. Instead, he had an idea; one he wasn't sure why he hadn't considered before. He was a leader, with access to the files on each Initiate, including the transfers. He couldn't figure out the little Abnegation fluff, so maybe her history might give some clue. Research came naturally to the former Erudite.

It didn't take much to pull up the files. Lilliana Eaton...? The Abnegation leader's daughter? That was a shock. He'd heard there was a scandal at the Choosing Ceremony, but such things were really of no interest to him most of the time. He kept up with current events, but gossip wasn't all that important. It was a waste of time, when there was no way to know what information gained was empirical fact and what was conjecture.

As he read through the very short history, Eric almost let his jaw hit the floor.

Lilliana Eaton

Born: Abnegation

Faction: Transfer Initiate, Dauntless

Age: 16

Father: Marcus Eaton, Abnegation

Mother: Evelyn Eaton, Abnegation

That was all to be expected. It was the final line that brought on the stunned disbelief in the irascible, angry man.

Siblings: Tobias Eaton, Dauntless

Tobias Eaton… he knew that name. Then it hit him. She was related to FOUR!? His damn sister?! Eric felt his mind reeling… it wasn't possible. Why hadn't she taken advantage of the connection? Why had she done nothing to even indicate they were related? If anything, she seemed to avoid the older Eaton. Bad blood? Or something else? It explained the unaccountable concern Four had displayed for her in training, when he'd all but demanded Eric take her to the infirmary for apparently no reason. But it raised so many more questions than it answered. No one really remembered Four's real name, even those from their year. He'd always been so taciturn, so unassuming, that very few even bothered to learn it in the first place. And he'd earned his nickname during his Initiation, so the wider world of Dauntless knew him by that.

Lilla Eaton… Just what the hell was she doing in Dauntless? Eric didn't know why Four had transferred, but he had fit into the harsh Faction well. Too well, if you were to ask the man who came in second to his first place. Would the younger sister fit in as well? Thus far, she seemed pretty hopeless in the lessons with the punching bags. Although, he thought she could probably be pretty quick if she wanted to, and that might save her in a real fight. But she seemed almost completely fearless, and that would go a long way in making her Dauntless material. Still, he could use this information. He wasn't sure how yet, but it would come in handy to hurt either of the Eaton siblings, should he choose to do so. He would wait until the opportune moment, and then deal his ace against Four. Revenge would be sweet…