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Dance of the Cuckoos: Chapter 2
Gritting his teeth, the Doctor fought his way toward a familiar mane of red hair.
"Donna!" he called out. The mane of red hair turned around to look at him.
"Doctor!" she yelled back and pointed at his direction. "Behind you!"
The Doctor glanced behind and his mouth hung open in disbelief and he felt his two hearts seize for a moment. Right behind him was the legendary comedic duo of Laurel and Hardy. He caught the eye of Laurel and to his inner delight received a hello.
"Hello," The Doctor said back, raising his voice in order to be heard.
Hardy nodded at him with a twinkle in his eye and took the Doctor's hand to shake it vigorously.
"Good to meet you, sur," Hardy said loudly in his Georgia-style speech.
"Oh I should think so," the Doctor beamed and watched as Laurel and Hardy continued to make their way through the crowd. Behind him appeared Donna, Vastra and Jenny.
"Doctor! Where have you—who are you?" Donna asked, looking at Vastra more than Jenny.
"I am Madam Vastra and this is my wife, Jenny," Vastra said, indicating herself and Jenny.
"What are you?" Donna asked before realizing how rude she might have sounded. "That is, I've never seen anyone who's-" she broke off, unsure of her phrasing.
"Like me?" Vastra asked with a hint of superiority.
"Forgive me for seeming rude," Donna apologized.
"Nah, you're not being rude!" the Doctor said, jumping in. "You were just being curious. Madam Vastra is, if I may, a Silurian. Her species were here before your kind. Well, they're still here. Well, technically. They're in hibernation under the Earth. Don't worry, won't wake up in your time. I don't think. Discussion for another time."
"Sorry but," Donna said and turned toward Vastra again. "Are you a time traveler as well? I noticed that you're not wearing the right clothes for this point in time." Vastra looked at Jenny, who gave an approving nod.
The Doctor, finally noticing their clothing for the first time, saw that they were indeed in wrong period clothing. He stared at Donna again in disbelief.
"How did you notice that and I didn't?"
"Because, Doctor. You're not a woman," Donna explained, to which Vastra and Jenny smiled.
"Very good, Miss…?"
"Donna Noble!" Doctor chimed in. "Sorry, where are my manners? Donna, this is—"
"I know what their names are already, Doctor," Donna said.
"Right, and…oh," the Doctor said, sheepishly trailing off. Vastra ignored this.
"Miss Noble, we have been traveling as of late, however this is merely a detour in our regular occupation."
"And what's that?" Donna asked.
"Madam Vastra is a private investigator," Jenny explained. "One of the best in the business."
"Please, love," Vastra smiled. "No need to boast on my account."
"Simply stating the facts, ma'am," Jenny said.
"I was actually on a case," Vastra explained to Donna and the Doctor. "before I came here. But Jenny wanted to see Laurel and Hardy. Though, I don't think that quite counted, Jenny," Vastra added, turning toward her.
"It was fine, ma'am," Jenny said. "I saw them up close with the Doctor."
"Well, I must say you have a way with humans, Doctor," Vastra commented. "You were so terribly polite to them."
"Oh no, Madam," the Doctor insisted. "They were the ones that are what you would call 'above human life'." He shook his head in admiration. "I've read about how Laurel was one the few celebrities who had his number in the phone book so that way anyone could call him while he was in retirement."
"Doctor," Donna said, who had been quiet up to this point. "Now that I saw them, I want to talk to them."
"Well, we can go back to the TARDIS and phone Laurel in the fifties, or—"
"No," Jenny said. "I have a better idea."
All of them looked at Jenny in surprise.
"What's that, Jenny?" the Doctor asked.
"I have a book on Laurel and Hardy while they were on their British tours," Jenny said and pulled out a book from her satchel. "In here is where Laurel and Hardy went and what they did on those tours. That's how I knew Laurel and Hardy would be here at this point in time. There is one time where at least one of them is alone for a few hours on a beach here in Blackpool."
"Oh, we're in Blackpool," the Doctor said and snapped his fingers in self-annoyance. "Darn it, I messed up again."
"It doesn't matter," Donna said. "What matters is that we are here and I want to see at least one of them up close." She turned to Jenny. "Do you know what beach?"
"Don't you think you could pick a different point in time to see one of them?" the Doctor asked. "I mean, I've read that book and those poor blokes are mobbed practically everywhere they go."
"I'm not going to mob them," Donna reassured him. "I'm just going to observe him from a distance and then sometime in their future, I'll give them a call."
"But—," the Doctor protested.
"Please, Doctor?" Donna begged. "I just want to see him, that's all."
The Doctor opened him mouth to argue and then closed it with a sigh.
"All right," he agreed.
"Where is he?" Donna whispered as the four of them walked down the beach.
"Donna, you don't have to whisper," the Doctor whispered.
"You're whispering," Donna hissed.
"Because you started it," the Doctor murmured.
"What do you mean, I started it?" Donna whispered loudly.
"People automatically start whispering when other people do it and you started it so that's why I'm whispering!" the Doctor explained in a loud whisper.
"Honestly," Vastra hissed. "Are you sure you two aren't the married ones around here?"
That shut the Doctor and Donna up. They looked at each other quickly before shaking their heads at an amused Vastra and Jenny.
"We are not—,"
"We're definitely not—,"
"Quiet," Jenny said. "Somebody's coming up ahead."
They all looked ahead and saw that a dark figure was walking toward them. Hastily, the Doctor gestured at all of them to follow him.
"Hide, quick, quick, quick!" the Doctor whispered as all of them ran up the side of the beach to the nearest thing large enough for the four of them to hide. By the edge of the grass was a large tree and they all quickly hid behind it as best as they could.
"Is that them?" Donna whispered as they looked at the figure walking near them. The Doctor squinted.
"I don't know. It looks like one of them but it's hard to tell."
"Doctor," Vastra said, her voice tight. "That's not a human.
"Wha-?" The Doctor said in disbelief. "It can't be."
"Madam Vastra is able to see better at night than during the day," Jenny informed the Doctor. "If she says there is an alien out there, then there is an alien out there."
"But Laurel or Hardy is coming this way tonight," Donna said in alarm. "They might be in danger."
"But Laurel and Hardy don't die here," Jenny protested.
"Time can be rewritten," the Doctor said darkly before rushing out of his hiding spot toward the creature. Vastra followed close behind, unsheathing a sword as she ran. Jenny looked at Donna before pulling out a gun.
"Best stay here, ma'am. Wouldn't want you to get hurt," Jenny said before running off.
"I'm not bloody standing here!" Donna said angrily, before running after her.
The Doctor pulled out his screwdriver to scan the creature. But before the Doctor could do anything, the creature spoke in a loud voice,
"State your name, rank, planet of origin and quadrant of the galaxy!" the creature demanded.
"Doctor," Vastra said. "It's a Sontaran."
The creature stepped forward so that the Doctor could finally get a good look at the Sontaran. It was a short little thing and it was carrying a gun. Not batting an eye, the Doctor stared down the barrel of the Sontaran's gun.
"I'm from the planet Gallifry in the constellation of Kasterborous. I'm 904 years old and I am the Doctor," the Doctor said.
"General Strax of the Sontaran Empire," the Sontaran announced and aimed his gun at the Doctor's hearts. "Prepare to be obliterated for the glory of the Sontaran Empire!"
To be continued…