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I looked at Tobias and wrapped my free hand around his neck to pull him down for a kiss. I realized how much I missed being able to kiss him and feel his hand in mine. When we pulled away, he looked at me for a long time, studying my face.
"I love you." he said.
"I love you, too." I replied.
I stared into his eyes for a few moments. How much I had missed those eyes. I looked at him a little longer, then was pulled back into reality by my wandering thoughts.
"I'm so sorry." was all I could get out, no wanting to get myself more worked up.
He rubbed his thumb over my lips. Taking in all of my face and features.
"It okay. As long as I know you're okay, I'm okay, we're okay." he finally said.
We looked sit each other for a another moment, before Tobias pulled away slightly to sit on my bed.
"How are you feeling?" he asked me.
I thought about for a moment.
"I am okay. Defiantly had better days though." I said smiling lightly.
He sat thought about my response. I know he want to say something like 'Tris you have been through hell and back, and all you can come up with is that.' But he seemed to drop it and move on.
"I am glad your feeling okay and you are okay."
I waited a second, not wanted to become upset or make him upset with my next question.
"How are you doing, Tobias?" I asked daringly, knowing he did not want to make it about him. I did though, I didn't want to have to think about all the things wrong with me or the world at this point.
He considered the question for a while. Clearly deciding on what was an appropriate answer to share and what was not, what was saying too much and what was saying too little, and what could I handle right now and what could I not.
"I am okay. Had better days." he replied, mocking me in a way.
I decided to let it go and move on, as I thought he had earlier. I figured by doing this I could possibly avoid the probable reprimanding to follow later. Hopefully it works, I thought. I continued then to file through the many questions I have to ask him about what is going on. I went through the many questions, attempting to prioritize them from most to least import on the list.
I was then pulled from my thoughts when Tobias spoke, "I should probably inform the doctor you're awake and doing okay." he stated.
"Okay."
He then kissed me on the forehead and walked out of the room. As I watched him leave, I saw him walk outside the door and Christina walk around the corner. She was looking for something in her bag. Tobias said something to her and she entered the room, carrying two bags.
"Hey… How ya feeling?" she asked.
"I pretty good. Glad to be awake and see everyone. Four went to tell the doctors I was up."
Some people knew his name, but everyone and anyone he encountered called him, 'Four', even our close friends.
"I know, he mentioned it in the hall. I brought you some clothes." she said holding up the bag smiling.
"He looks a lot better, even then he did when he was sleeping when we last talked. I am glad to see him doing and looking so much better. I have never seen anyone so depressed and stressed before, it was odd. Especially seeing it from Four. Anyway, do you want something to eat, I can get something from the kitchen if you want?"
"No, I think I'm ok right now. Still adjusting." I replied
"Okay. I brought you some clothes, they're in the black bag over near the for on the counter."
"Thanks" I replied.
"We are all staying in the dorms for right now, we are still deciding what to do. The city is still a bit chaotic since everything happened. They are still deciding what to do and how to govern the city peacefully."
I stayed quiet for a moment considering what she said. I didn't really think about, what were we going to do? We didn't really belong here, it wasn't our home and it wasn't the place I saw myself living the rest of my life in. What about the fractions system, would it still be the way we lived even without the Bureau? I looked up at her and thought about my response.
"I don't know where we belong, honestly. Or where we should live, everything seems like it has fallen apart for us."
She frowned at my response, I could see by her expression she understood how I felt.
"I don't know we belong either. I'm not going to sit here and tell you I know, and that everything will go back to normal and promise you it will be okay, because I don't, and because I'm still candor, and won't say something I don't know or mean." she smiled at me.
I smiled back, and laughed at her statement about being candor, I knew how she felt not loosing your fraction roots from where you were raised. It was nice to laugh and be able to joke around a bit, especially with your best friend.
The door opened, pulling me from my thought, and Tobias walked in.
"Hey." he said to Christina and I.
"Hi Four, I was just dropping off some clothes for Tris and seeing how she was doing?" she paused a moment, thinking about what to say.
"Someone should probably tell Caleb and the others you're up, so I'll go tell them. See you later, Tris. Bye Four." She said and left without saying anything else.
We looked at each other for a moment and then Tobias sat down next to me on the bed. He leaned in and I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him.
He finally broke the kiss. "How are you feeling?" he asked.
"Fine, glad to be awake." I said with a smile.
"Do you want something to eat? The doctor will be coming soon to check on you and run some tests."
"I'll ok, but after the doctor comes, maybe then I could eat something."
"Okay." he said. There was a long pause before he continued.
"You have no idea how much I missed you. Not knowing whether or not you would wake up was the one of the hardest thing I have been through. I don't know what I would do if I lost you." he said.
I stared at him for a moment, my heart shattering as he told me how he felt and what I put him through.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Please review! How do you think Tris will react, what will she say?