"The most beautiful people I've known are those who have known trials, have known struggles, have known loss, and have found their way out of the depths."
― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

We laid together in the wake of destruction. The room was redecorated in articles of clothing and knocked over furniture. There was something beautiful about it. Passion is a feeling; you can't hold it in your hands or see it with your eyes. It's just there or it simply isn't. If I had to describe what I thought it looked like, it would be the way the lamp was tipped over on the floor, the way my jeans were tossed into the corner, and his leather cut laying over the arm of the couch. One shoe was missing, and the other sitting next to an over-turned ashtray, cigarette butts scattered everywhere. It was a perfect mess. If you had asked me two months ago where I seen myself in the near future, this wasn't it. If you had asked me two months ago what I wanted out of life, this wasn't it, either. It's funny how fast things change. This is exactly where I want to be, and I want him.

My head was resting on his chest as he ran his fingers over my shoulder. I silently wished I could freeze time- hold onto this moment for as long as possible. My mind wandered to the blonde woman who was so eagerly throwing herself at Jax. I pictured what would be happening right now had I not kicked her out. She would be laying in the same position I was, clutching onto him. My heart sunk.

"That woman you were with tonight," I said, "who was she?"

He sighed, "I don't know."

"You don't know her?"

"She's a crow eater. That's what we call women who hang around and sleep with members of the club."

"And you sleep with a lot of them?"

"I have. Hundreds, maybe more. I don't know. I barely see their faces anymore."

I scrunched my face in confusion. "Am I a crow eater?"

"No darlin', you're something else." He said, pulling me closer.

"What am I?"

"I don't know," he sighed, "but when I'm with you, I forget about all the bull shit; all the women I've been with, the endless blood-spill, the constant worry that one day I'm going to have to bury a brother because of the lifestyle we live. It all disappears and the only thing I can think of is how the moonlight looks on your skin... and the way your body feels pressed against mine."

"What happened the other night," he added, "will happen again. I don't know when, or why but it will. I'd be selfish to ask you to stay here, to be a part of who I am. That was just the tip of the iceberg. It'll get worse. It's inevitable when you lead a certain life. If you were smart, you'd leave."

"Are you trying to scare me?"

"Yeah." He said.

"I'm not going anywhere." I replied, yawning. I closed my eyes and drifted to sleep.

The early morning sun crept through the window, interrupting my sleep. I reached my arm out and sat upright when I realized I was alone in the bed. The room had been cleaned up, returning to it's slightly disorganized state in which it was kept. The clock on the nightstand told me it was 9:00 a.m. I grabbed a red shirt and a pair of pants out of my bag.

Jax's words from last night were still fresh on my mind. He had feelings for me, I think. I couldn't be sure. I've never be in the situation where I was questioning how someone felt about me. I never gave a damn, to be honest.

The club house was unusually quiet, I noted, walking down the hallway. Gemma was in the kitchen, watching the news. She nodded at me when she noticed my presence.

"Morning,"

"Where is everyone?" I asked her, pouring a cup of coffee.

"There was another meeting with Alvarez today," she said, "Hopefully the last. I've got shit to do. I think we're all tired of being holed up in this joint."

"I've got to find a job and work on Unser's house." I shook my head. "It feels so vacant inside."

"Guess that means you're sticking around." She smirked.

Of course I'm sticking around, I thought. I'm head over heels for your son. Hell, I couldn't even imagine leaving. Jax was the first person I've thought about every morning since the funeral and the last person I've thought of before I went to sleep at night. It was sickening, almost, how much he invaded my mind.

"Do you worry about them when they're not here?" I asked, changing the subject. Gemma understood that I was referring to the Son's. She was the mother-figure for every one of them, aside from Clay. "What if they all don't come back? Or get hurt. Or-" She cut me off.

"You can't think like that... Not around here. You'll drive yourself crazy. I worry about them but they're tough. This is what they do.. Men handle business."

She stood up and set her hand on my shoulder. "Come on, let's get some fresh air."

I followed her lead. She walked outside and sat at a picnic table. Gemma pulled a pack of cigarettes out of her purse and offered me one. I lit it up, noticing the woman from last night across the lot from me. The blonde was talking to half-sack, who was working on a car. I momentarily questioned what he was still doing here. The prospects must have to protect the club house during a lockdown. My attention focused back on the woman as she leaned over the hood, giggling over something he said. I scowled.

"That's one of Luann's girls."

"Huh?" I asked, turning my attention back to Gemma.

"That girl you're staring at.. names Ima. She's a porn star.. hangs around here and spreads her pussy like it's the black plague."

"Who's Luann?"

"A friend of the club. Otto Delaney's old lady.. She runs a pornography studio called Cara Cara."

"Is Otto a part of the club? I asked her.

"Yeah, he's in the big house though.. He did a lot of shit for this club." She said.

I was tempted to ask her what kind of shit he did. I brushed it off. I didn't need to know and would most likely wish I hadn't if I did. "So what's your beef with Ima?" She asked.

"I don't have any." I said.

"Bullshit, I know that look. What is it?"

"She was hooking up with Jax last night. I lost it.. pulled her off of him." I recalled.

"Good." Gemma said. I looked at her questioningly. "You have to let them know he ain't free dick."

"We're not together."

She took a drag of her cigarette. "It's all about knowing what you want and then taking it, sweetheart. And don't let anyone get in the way of it."

The door to the club house opened and Donna walked out. She sat down at the table and sighed. "If I don't find something to do, I'm going to lose my mind." She said.

"Welcome to the club," Gemma replied. I smiled at her play on words.

"This is the second day in a row I had to call off of work," Donna said. "I'll be lucky if I even have a job still."

"I'm sure if the owner didn't freak out over the riot, he won't mind that you can't come in." I said.

"I know, I know. Perks of your boss being in bed with the club, but still.."

"What do you mean in bed with the club?" I asked. She began speaking but Gemma cut her off.

"The Iron Horse burnt down a few years back.. Clay gave the guy money to rebuild in exchange for half of the profits."

"Smart." I said. Gemma nodded.

"I'll see you two later, I got paperwork coming out the ass in there." She said, putting her cigarette out and motioning towards the small building diagonal from us. The click of her heeled-boots on the concrete slowly faded as she walked away.

Donna's attention diverted behind me as I felt a hand touch my shoulder. I immediately shrugged it off, seeing the confusion in Donna's eyes, and turned around.

I was met by a very annoyed Ima, who was glaring at me.

"You have a lot of nerve coming over here." I said, firmly.

"Stay away from Jax." She demanded. "You have no business being with him."

"Excuse me?"

"You should be shining his motorcycle not obsessing over him." She said.

I stood up, moving closer to her. She stepped backwards. "I suggest you watch how you talk to me."

"Or what?" She replied, putting her hands on her hips and popping the gum in her mouth.

I grabbed the back of her head, tangling my fingers in her hair and bashed her face off of the table. Donna jumped, throwing her hand over her mouth, shocked. I seen blood trickle down the blonde's cheek. She cried out in pain. Know what you want, and then take it, Gemma's words ran through my mind. Ima steadied herself and half-jogged in the opposite direction.

"Where did that come from?" Donna said, surprised.

"I don't know." I lied, peering over to the office. Two brown eyes were peeking out of the blinds. I felt my hand sting. I forgot it was still healing from the glass. I winced, shaking it off and headed inside.

I felt something touch my forehead. It moved down my nose and onto my cheek. I opened my eyes in bewilderment. Jax was positioned on top of me planting small kisses on my face. I must have fallen asleep. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he kissed me on the lips, realizing I was awake.

"Hi." I said.

"Hi darlin'."

"You're in a good mood." I pointed out.

"I came home to this beautiful woman in my bed, how could I not be?" He said, moving off of me and propping himself up on his elbow.

"How'd everything go?" I turned on my side to face him.

"It's handled." He told me, "Alvarez recognized the ink from a low-ranking club called the Calaveras out in Lodi. They did dirty work for the Mayans back in the day."

I scrunched my face in confusion. "Why would they shoot up a bar in Charming?"

"Alvarez stripped their president of his patch a few weeks ago. Salazar wasn't controlling his club, a few of them got theirselves involved in some pretty bad shit that spilled over onto Mayan territory. Salazar was pissed and rounded a couple people up and tried to frame the Mayans for a shoot-out so we would retaliate. They were trailing us that night, they just didn't expect the rest of the Son's to show up."

"So where is Salazar now?" I asked him.

"He's been dealt with." He stated, matter-of-factly. I nodded, not pressing for any more details.

"So the club isn't on lock down anymore?"

"Na, Charming's safe again."

I frowned, thinking of what that would mean for us. I remembered how adamant he was about me getting out of this town just last night. Would he push me away again now that he didn't have to keep me here for protection?

"What's wrong," he asked, evaluating my expression.

I shook my head, "Nothing, it's just.. I liked being with you."

He cupped my face in his hands. "Darlin', don't worry about us. You're not getting rid of me that easily."

"You sure?" I asked.

He sighed, releasing my face from his grip. "There's this old saying.. Some people die at twenty-five and aren't buried until they're seventy-five." I furrowed my eyebrows, anticipating his explanation. "I never understood it before.. I do now. It's like I was dead inside, so numb to everything. And then I met you... Something changed, fast. I'm in, okay? All or nothing. No lies, no secrets, just me and you." I nodded.

"Come on, I'll ride you home." He picked me up off the bed and carried me bride-style down the hall way, setting me down in the bar room. The Son's were sitting around, drinking beer. Everyone else had left.

We headed out the door towards his bike. He stopped in his tracks, looking over at a little white car that a little blonde was getting into.

"What happened to her?" He asked.

"I don't know." I said, humor in my voice. He handed me his helmet and I jumped on back, wrapping my arms around him and letting the wind blow through my hair.

"Gemma's having a get together at her place tonight." He said as I was walking to the front steps at Unser's. "Everyone's gonna be there."

I turned around, focusing my attention on him. "Is that an invitation?"

"8 o'clock." He said, "don't keep me waiting." He smiled and pulled out of the driveway. I listened to the sound of his motorcycle drowning out in the distance before reaching for the door handle.

I quickly showered and wrapped a towel around my body. Stepping into the livingroom, I decided to look through the house to kill some time. In the far back of the closet was a small cardboard box. It had the word Pictures scribbled sloppily on the front of it. I brought it to the center of the room, set it down on the floor and positioned myself next to it. It was filled to the top. I grabbed a handful of them and began inspecting them.

The first one was a family portrait of Wayne, Della and his children. I noticed how happy he looked and frowned. How could these people leave him by himself while he was dying and not even have the decency to show up to his funeral? I flipped it to the bottom of the stack. Gemma, I thought, seeing the petite brunette's young and fresh face. She was standing next to Unser, holding his hand. They couldn't be any older than fifteen. I removed it and set it to the side, deciding to give it her later tonight. The next one was a photo of my mother when she was pregnant. She was wearing a long sun dress, staring towards into space. She had her hands on her stomach, seemingly protecting it. I smiled and set the pictures down. I decided I would look through them some other time.

I got up and headed to the bathroom, throwing on a casual white v-neck and a pair of jeans. I let my hair dry into it's normal curls and deemed myself 'good enough'. I grabbed my cellphone off of the charger and checked the time. 7:32 p.m, my heart beat was speeding and I couldn't shake the nervous feeling inside of me. I had just spent days with these people; it was completely unjustified to be anxious all of a sudden. The sound of something hitting the window in the other room broke my thoughts.

I walked to where I had heard the impact and slowly pulled the blind down. I was significantly surprised to see the shadow of a man standing next to a tree in the front yard. I watched him for awhile. I couldn't make out his face from the lack of light. He started walking towards me. I gasped, stepping backwards before sprinting to lock the door.

A/N: (((((PLEASE REVIEW if you liked the chapter, once again I'll update sooner if you guys want me to.))))))) I wanted to say I truly appreciate everyone who takes the time to read this story. Also, to clear things up... This story is set to when Jax is younger, about 26ish. And Opie and Donna don't have kids yet. I'm really excited to post the next couple of chapters. I think you guys will really enjoy the suspense in them. ANYWAYS, If anyone here has a twitter, I'd suggest going and following Kurt Sutter. He's seriously hilarious. I was also super excited to tell you guys that he tweeted that Adam Levine was signed to the show as Opie's nomad brother. I have a feeling that it's a joke, but how awesome would that be?