A/N: Thank you all for sticking with me and sending me lots of love on this story, it fills my heart with the warm and fuzzies knowing the Gail/Holly fandom are still here and going strong.
Just a small word, I keep getting anon messages on tumblr and guest reviews on saying 'where's the update?!' 'update now!' etc, and while I'm so flattered and delighted that you're enjoying the fic and want more of it, writing is just a hobby for me. I work, I'm studying for my degree, I'm in the process of selling my house and moving, so finding time to write is slim, and I do it whenever I get a spare moment. You have my word that this story will be completed but I kindly ask you to just have a little patience for me :) Thank you.
(And to the anon super, super, super concerned with the story title, it was simply named after the Tegan and Sara song 'I Was Married' as indicated in chapter one – not a foreboding hint that they don't end up together. I'm all about happy endings, okay? So chill.)
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I Was Married 4/?
/
The first real hint that Gail gets that something more than meets the eye may be bubbling just under the surface of Holly's feelings for her, comes when she least expects to see it.
Just as tradition goes whenever a member of her family has served with the Toronto PD for their whole career, when her father retires just shy of his seventieth birthday, the rest of the Pecks come together to host a large celebration in his honour.
While normally an elegant affair, where her family and important members of the police department and the city are wined and dined at Toronto's top French restaurant – making speeches and sharing tales of the officer's finest moments – this year the party is a more relaxed event, taking place at the Peck family home.
She knows her mother's not too happy about having a hundred guests swarming through her house, but always the most dutiful host and wife, she's made it work and then some, erecting a large marquee in their garden and providing wonderful food and entertainment for all. The location change was her father's request, her once stern and rather strict father mellowing in his old age, wanting nothing more than to share the finest Cuban cigars and the best whiskey with his old buddies.
"It's kind of weird to see your dad looking so relaxed, especially considering the whole time I've known him, he's been the model of formality," Holly comments, her eyes flicking briefly to the waiter as he stops to offer her another glass of champagne. "I mean he's actually laughing, Gail."
Gail follows Holly's eye-line, taking in the sight of her father merrily guffawing at something the mayor is saying to him. "I know right, it's truly terrifying," Gail replies, scowling at the waiter as he offers her a fresh glass, and quickly reaching out to swipe the bottle instead before shooing him away. "The only time I ever saw him laugh like that growing up, is when I beat Steve at the BB-gun target practice he'd set up for us, and Steve cried like a little bitch baby."
Holly shakes her head in amusement. "What a sweet Peck family story."
"What can I say," Gail grins cheekily and swigs from the bottle, "we're a tender-hearted bunch."
Holly chuckles at that and bumps their shoulders together. "Are these party's always so boring?"
She's attended a few Peck family lunches over her years of friendship with Gail, but never quite something this high-priority and elaborate, and Gail knows it must be quite the shock to the system to see the Pecks in all their policing royalty, there is after all, literally loads of her extended family floating around, surrounded in clouds of their own egos.
"Don't let my mother hear you say that, Holly," Gail retorts, feigning shock even as her eyes twinkle playfully. "You know you're her favourite, it will break her heart if you're not having the time of your life interacting with the city's finest thoroughbreds."
"Oh god," Holly grimaces, spotting Elaine approaching them like a missile locked on to its target. "She's not going to try and set me up with someone like the dull banker again, is she? Because that was the most awkward date of my life."
Gail laughs as she recalls the memory of Holly's Elaine set-up, back during the early months of their friendship, before Elaine clocked on that Holly was a lesbian, where setting her up with top banker Thomas Greenwich had seemed like a match-made in Elaine heaven, much to poor Holly's horror.
"Don't worry, Lunchbox, she's stated her unfavourable opinion on the female contenders ever since, deeming them unworthy of you, so I think you're safe for now," Gail reassures, and then, seeing who Elaine is bringing over to introduce to them, adds, "I, on the other-hand, am never going to be be able to dispel her matchmaking quest."
Holly quirks her eyebrow questioningly at her comment, but before she can ask Gail to expand, Elaine is coming to a brisk stop in front of them with a tall, dark, and devilishly handsome young man at her side.
"I see you're up to mischief already," Elaine says, her eyes glancing disapprovingly at the bottle of champagne clutched in Gail's hands, and then her eyes flick up to Holly's. "Hello sweetheart, I'm glad you could come, it's been far too long since Gail brought you by."
"It's good to see you too, Elaine," Holly returns politely with a smile. "You've done a wonderful job today, your husband looks very happy."
Elaine glances over at Bill, still deeply engaged in conversation with some of his former colleagues as he smokes yet another cigar. "It's true, retirement suits some more than others," she says rather stiffly, and then as she turns back to meet Holly's gaze adds, "I, on the contrary, don't intend to join my husband any time soon, as I'm sure somebody as driven as yourself can understand; our work is our top priority above all else."
Gail glances at Holly, sensing her discomfort at the comment as her jaw clenches, Elaine managing to lace the conversation with her usual brand of unwanted life values. "Hello Henry, it's been a long time," she greets, saving Holly from having to falsely agree with her mother that work should be everything to a person.
"It's certainly has," he replies with a smile that's as charming as she remembers it to be. "It's good to see you again, Gail."
Her acknowledgement of Henry without Elaine's forced introduction seems to draw her mother back to the task at hand. "Apologies, where are my manners," she cuts in, and then glancing to Holly once more, says, "This is Henry Cooper, Gail's old high school boyfriend, and one of the country's top architects. His grandfather and father helped design the structures for our finest prisons. Henry, this is Gail's dear friend, Dr. Holly Stewart, an extraordinary forensic pathologist who works for my division."
"It's lovely to meet you," Henry says sincerely, reaching out to shake Holly's hand in greeting.
Holly, who still looks a little stunned at this unexpected bombardment from Gail's past, bristles slightly at his offering. "Likewise," she forces herself to reply with a tight smile, just about managing to accept Henry's hand rather stiffly.
"Henry's just moved back to Toronto after living in Vancouver for the past decade," Elaine informs them. "I've luckily managed to convince the mayor to poach him back to work on the new designs for Toronto's city hall renovation."
Her break-up with Henry all those years ago had been amicable, both of them leaving for college and not wanting to hold each other back from new life experiences. He'd been her first real relationship, one from which she'd learned much about how to be with another person. She may have been young in the ways of love back then, but Henry had always treated her with respect and liked her for who she was. With the Coopers' being another well known family in Toronto, Henry had understood the pressure her parents had placed her under, and together, they had created a space and a trust where they could be at ease and share their true ambitions without fear.
It's a shame that they lost touch, Gail thinks, especially given the irony that despite their mutual desires to escape from their family's legacy, that they've both fallen prey to what their last names destined them to be.
"How long have you been back in town?" Gail asks kindly before her mother can get too carried away, impressed by her own abilities as usual.
"Only a few days, I've mostly been unpacking," Henry answers, looking relieved that Gail has curbed her mother. Having attended his own share of Peck family dinners, Henry knows all too well just how overbearing Elaine Peck can be once she gets going. "I sadly haven't had much time to get back in touch with Toronto and all of its wonders yet."
"Well there's a perfect little idea," Elaine cuts in again, gazing between Gail and Henry with a satisfied grin curling at her lips, and Gail hears a voice in her head mutter 'here we go again' as she readies herself. "Why don't you two go on a date this Friday evening and explore the city together, it would be the most wonderful way to catch up."
Gail tries not to roll her eyes in response, knowing from the minute she saw her mother approaching with Henry where this was all leading to. She really was never going to give up on setting Gail up with men she deemed appropriate, no matter how many times Gail has expressed her annoyance and disinterest in the whole thing.
She catches Henry glancing at her knowingly, clearing thinking the same thing as he shares a small smile with her, his eyes dancing in amusement. "What a charming idea, Elaine," Henry agrees in a chirpy tone, knowing that there really is no deterring Elaine Peck when she makes a suggestion like this. "It would be really nice to catch up with you, Gail; we could grab dinner downtown and share some memories."
Gail feels her mother's gaze piercing into her, daring her to refuse such a nice man and his generous offer. At least this time she knows Henry won't cripple her with boredom or expect her to hop into bed with him after he's bought her a cheap cup of coffee and failed to flatter her in a terrible fake British accent.
"Sounds like a plan," Gail accepts with a smile. "I finish at seven on Friday, so come by the station and we'll head out from there."
Henry returns her smile and nods. "I look forward to it," he says, looking relieved that they've arranged the night for themselves before Elaine could fully back them into a corner.
"Excellent," Elaine exclaims with a smug look and claps her hands together in self-approval. She turns to Holly, who's remained oddly quiet through the whole exchange and reaches for her arm. "Why don't we leave these two to get reacquainted properly, Holly," she says, tugging Holly towards her so that Henry and Gail are left stepping closer together. "There's some people here I've been meaning to introduce you to for awhile now anyway."
"Of course," Holly returns dutifully, her tone flatter than usual as she fleetingly lets her eyes catch Gail's, an unreadable expression rolling across her face. "It was nice to meet you, Henry," she says, nodding her head to him before letting Elaine lead her away without another word.
Gail's brow furrows together slightly as she watches Holly go, unsure how the moment went so swiftly from one of joy and laughter, to the air seemingly turning crisp and tense as she feels Holly physically and emotionally moving away from her.
For the rest of the party, Gail finds herself stuck with Henry's company just as her mother planned, and as nice as it is to catch up with her old friend, there's something about the way Holly won't meet her gaze full on, but appears nonetheless, to be watching her intently when she thinks Gail's not looking, that makes something gnaw at Gail's insides. A part of her wonders if Holly's mad at her for allowing her mother to just sweep her away into her clutches, and the other part, the part of her that's achingly longing for her best friend to return her feelings, wonders if the emotion rippling across the tight expression on Holly's face, is jealousy.
/
When Henry picks her up from the station on Friday night, she's thankful to see that it's without the added cliche of flowers or chocolates. He simply grins at her in his handsome, boyish way and tells her he's glad she's still rocking her leather jacket because he's come on his old, beloved motorbike that they used to explore the city on.
Instead of trying to romance her by taking her to some quiet, low lit restaurant with soft music playing in the background, he takes her to their old high school hangout, Joey's Diner, and buys her a burger with fries and a large strawberry milkshake.
It feels instantly like old times, like they've been transported back to their younger selves where staying out late on a Friday night was filled with greasy junk food, laughter, and games of pinball played on an old machine that's even older and worn now, one of the legs having been replaced with a plank of wood.
There's still an ease to being surrounded in Henry's company after all these years, and Gail feels grateful for having a night off from her aching heart and her exhausting, conflicting emotions over Holly. Her confusing best friend, who in the days following her father's retirement party, has returned to her distant ways much like those that followed their return home from Vegas, and consumed herself in her work even more than usual.
The spark of jealousy she thought she saw in Holly's eyes seems almost like an illusion now, and with each passing day she feels an increasing weariness seeping into her bones with not knowing for sure what's going on inside Holly's head. That's part of the reason why she feels so relieved to have a night away from worrying about it all, her body much in need of the comfortable relaxation that comes from spending time with an old friend.
"So, are you seeing anyone?" Henry asks as they leave the diner and stroll through the lit-up streets of downtown Toronto, enjoying the warm evening breeze.
Gail hates that question, knowing that its intent is normally a leading one laced with desire, but when Henry asks, the question feels like just a question, the curiosity of an old friend trying to gather the pieces of Gail's life that he's missed out on in his absence.
She opens her mouth to respond but the words trip and stumble on her tongue as thoughts of Vegas and Holly flood her mind. "It's... complicated," she answers slowly, her fingers curling around the gold-plastic ring that's suddenly burning hotly in her jacket pocket.
Henry smiles over at her understandingly. "I get it, Gail," he says reassuringly. "Your mother is as forceful as ever, but you're obviously not interested and I'm just fresh out of a six year relationship, so I'm not looking to get involved in anything new." Gail releases a relieved exhale and nods, glad that the last bit of uncertainty to their date has been cleared up. "I'm glad we can still be friends after all these years though, it really is good to catch up."
"Me too," Gail replies with a sincere smile that quickly grows playful. "Although, you still really suck at pinball."
"I don't suck, you're just unnaturally competitive, Peck," Henry laughs as he bumps their shoulders together.
"Yeah, yeah," Gail mutters with a teasing grin. "Keep on telling yourself whatever you need to, to make yourself feel better at being the absolute worst loser, Coop."
Henry smiles back at her and then after a moment of laid-back silence, says, "So, what's the deal with your friend Holly? She's obviously a very smart and gorgeous woman. Is she single?"
The question catches Gail a little off-guard, her body freezing slightly and faltering her step as Henry's eyes sparkle knowingly back at her, refusing to let her look away. She feels the heat rising up her neck, settling in her cheeks and burning the tips of her ears, and knows her pale skin must be blushing a rather bright shade of crimson when Henry breaks into a laugh.
"I thought I picked up on something between you," he says as he wraps his arm around Gail and squeezes her shoulders. "Falling for the best friend... you're right, that is complicated."
"Shut up," Gail mumbles back, blushing even harder.
She'd forgotten just how well Henry knows her, and has always been able to see through her bullshit and her defences. It shouldn't really be all that surprising, now that she thinks about it, that he's picked up on her feelings for Holly. He was the one she'd nervously shared her first time with, and dated comfortably for well over three years, a best friend as well as a good boyfriend, who she trusted to know her secrets, and allowed to see her raw and exposed as a teenager, still struggling to figure herself out. Together they'd shared the highs and lows of their family expectations, and she'd even let herself be vulnerable in his presence, falling apart in his arms the day she had awoken in hospital to find that her favourite Peck, Uncle Harry, had died in the car accident they'd been involved in as he took Gail out for doughnuts, her only monthly reprieve from her oppressive parents.
He grins back at her as she shrugs out of his embrace. "Does Holly know?" Gail feels her lips pressing together into a frown and shakes her head. Henry's mouth purses together into a sympathetic smile then. "You'll figure it out," he reassures kindly. "She seemed bothered by me and our interaction at the party, so maybe she's feeling something for you too."
"I hope so," Gail concurs somewhat sadly, the truth of the matter regarding Holly's feelings for her always feeling just out of her reach no matter how hard she tries to close the distance.
"Just give it some time, Gail," he says softly, "feelings changing like this for a friend you've had for a long time can take awhile to process. But until then, take comfort in the fact that not only do you have impeccable taste in women, but that this will also majorly piss off your mother and her plans to marry you off to some boring, rich, guy."
Gail feels her lips curling up into a small smile in response. "Fuck the family legacy," she says, remembering their motto from long ago. The one they'd say together whenever their families' expectations became too overbearing and heavy that it felt like they were gradually being dragged down by them.
"Fuck the family legacy," Henry echoes back at her with a big smile. "We are who we are, Gail, and we love who we love."
His words help to ease the torment of her heart, especially if now it's not just her, but both Henry and Oliver that are seeing slight inklings that Holly may feel something more for her. But Gail knows, that the only thing that will make her consuming love for Holly actually feel freeing rather than stifled and painfully suppressed, is if she can get a real, tangible sign from Holly herself that there's at least some hope that what she's feeling isn't entirely unrequited.
/
Gail knows that it's kind of a horrible and morbid thing when she wishes more than anything for some old remains to be discovered during her shift the next day, but she also knows that cornering Holly at a crime scene, where she has no excuse but to professionally engage with Gail at least, might just be her only current option. Especially when her last three texts to Holly have been returned with the simple reply of 'busy, sorry', ending Gail's attempts to converse with her best friend before she even gets started, something which is becoming near impossible for her to do during the week that's followed her father's retirement party.
Holly's cold shoulder act is not only confusing to her, but also beginning to piss her off slightly. Ignoring each other isn't what they do. They talk, about everything and anything, and always have, and Gail refuses to let Holly shut down any longer, either she's feeling something for her too, and that's why she's being weird, or she's overworking herself and taking it out on Gail, which isn't fair.
If feels like life is finally cutting her a little slack when, just after lunch, she gets called out to a woodland area not far from the one she first met Holly at all those years ago. By the time she arrives at the scene, Andy and Chris have cleared the area and taken the witness statements, and all that's left for Gail and Traci to do, is to examine the remains and talk to forensics.
Holly looks up as they approach, her eyes fleeting over Gail's before returning to the bones she's photographing. "Detectives," she greets formally.
"Dr. Stewart," Traci echoes back in kind, her eyes falling down to the bones. "What do we have then, any idea yet?"
Holly takes a final shot on her camera before passing it off to one of her assistants and standing to meet Traci's gaze more fully. "From the structure of the skeleton, you're looking at a young female," Holly informs them, snapping off her gloves. "I'd say she's around thirteen-to-fifteen years old, and has signs of significant breaks in both arms, her ribs and her jaw. But I need to get her back to my lab to determine the finer details."
Gail takes this moment of Holly being absorbed fully into her work to assert her presence in the conversation. "Any ID found with her?" she asks, her voice instantly drawing Holly's eyes to hers.
Holly nods and then turns to her assistant, holding her hand out and waiting for him to pass over an evidence bag. "Not an actual ID but she was wearing a school soccer jersey; Newtonbrook Secondary School," Holly adds as she passes the jersey over, the fabric torn in places and its school badge smeared slightly with blood.
"This could be the Kelly Randal case," Traci voices thoughtfully as she runs her thumb over the badge beneath the plastic evidence bag. "She went missing around five years ago after soccer practice one afternoon. Her parents' filed her as missing but she was never found and there were never any concrete leads."
Gail nods in agreement, recalling the case. "Could be," she says to Traci and then glancing back to meet Holly's eyes, says, "I'll come back with you to the lab, Dr. Stewart, if you don't mind, I want to be there the minute you get the results."
She half expects Holly to protest to her company but Holly simply nods and accepts the evidence bag back from her. "I need another ten minutes here and then we can go," she replies. "If you want to head back to the station Detective Nash, I can take Detective Peck back to the lab with me when I'm done here."
"Sounds like a plan," Traci says with a firm nod, and then to Gail, "Call me the second those results come in, I'll be going over the case notes."
Gail accepts her orders compliantly and stands quietly off to the side while she gives Holly room to finish gathering all of the samples she needs. Once the remains are packed up and ready to go she follows Holly back to her car and rides the journey back to the lab with her in utter silence.
The silence envelops them in an uncomfortable awkwardness that Gail doesn't ever remember feeling around Holly before, and by the time Holly has her tests underway and running, Gail can't hold herself back any longer.
"Are you mad at me?" she blurts, the words ricocheting around the sterile stillness of Holly's lab rather unexpectedly and startling them both.
Holly looks up at her, her brow furrowed slightly and shakes her head. "Why would I be mad at you?"
"I don't know, about me letting my mother kidnap you at the party maybe," Gail says unsurely, her shoulders shrugging.
Holly releases a heavy sigh in response. "Don't be silly, Gail, your mother didn't kidnap me, and even if she did, I'm old enough to look after myself."
Gail frowns in return, her agitation growing at the brush off. "Then what's with the cold shoulder, Hol?" she snaps back, her voice raising slightly.
She sees the rigid set of Holly's jaw then as she stares back at her tiredly. "I haven't meant to be cold, I've just been so swapped with work," she says softly, an apologetic smile twisting at her lips. "You know how I get, so stuck in my own head when all this stuff gets on top of me, I'm sorry if I've been a little off but my boss is putting a lot of pressure on me at the moment."
It should feel like a relief to know what's been bothering Holly and stealing all of her attention, but all Holly's answer does is make her heart pinch sorrowfully. For the first time today, she lets her eyes properly absorb her best friend, taking in her slightly dishevelled appearance and the dark circles looming heavily under her eyes – the ever so familiar and tell-tale signs that Holly's been stressed and overdoing it – and thinks that maybe she really has deluded herself into thinking there could be something more blossoming between them.
Gail shakes her head and swallows the lump forming in her throat, feeling it land heavily in her chest as if the weight of her disappointment is crushing her lungs and stealing all of her breath. "It's okay," she murmurs quietly, forcing a small smile onto her lips. "You really should take a break though, Hol, before you run yourself too ragged. Come to The Penny with me tomorrow night and chill out for a few hours, de-science that big brain of yours."
"De-science isn't a word, you know," Holly replies, even as she smiles appreciatively at the offer. "Everybody going to be there?" she asks good-naturedly, knowing that every other Friday night is deemed a Penny night by the gang from 15 Division, and that she's always more than welcome to join them.
"More than likely," Gail replies honestly, deciding that it's time that she just accept that this thing with Holly – their not-marriage marriage – was inevitably fated to be doomed from the get-go, no matter how much she wishes otherwise. "Henry wanted to come by and meet some of the officers I worked with, and he's bringing by a few of our old high school friends, so it should be a big, fun get together, with the added bonus of alcohol of course."
The moment Henry's name falls from her lips she sees the transformation happen to Holly instantly; her tired but happy smile morphing into a hard thin line, her spine stiffening and her body tensing rigidly as her expression grows stony, and her sparkling eyes dimming from a warm amber to a remote darkness.
"Oh. So your night out with him went well then," Holly observes more then questions, her tone shifting from soft and interested to solemn and distant, a hint of involuntary hurt creeping in and tangling into the sharp edges of her words.
It's only brief, almost as if Holly is purposely tampering it down the moment it dares to flicker, and forcing it back into the dark depths it arose from, but Gail feels Holly's jealousy thrumming through every pour of her taut body and radiating out into the space between them. The tendrils of it that manage to spill free before Holly locks it back down, wrap around Gail's ankles like vines marking their territory, curling and weaving tightly up around every inch of her, until she feels it possessively carving into her chest and taking root in the centre of her aching heart.
It should feel constricting and terrifying to be so overwhelmed with a sudden hit of unexpected, raw emotion, but all Gail feels as she stares back at the embers igniting hotly just behind the surface of Holly's thinly veiled, stoic gaze, is hope.
/
She's not the least bit surprised, of course, when she receives a text from Holly at the end of her shift on Friday, informing Gail that a last minute report needs her sudden attention and she won't be coming to The Penny after all. The truth of the matter is that she had expected Holly to wheedle her way out of coming from the moment Holly had, in rather strained voice, accepted her invitation in the first place.
There's no way though, that she's going to let Holly keep dodging around her, especially now that she's seen a hint of the green-eyed monster peering from the shadows of Holly's eyes. Gail needs to know more about it, whether Holly is jealous that Henry may be a potential romance or whether she's fearing being replaced by him as Gail's BFF, the worry that he's known Gail longer, and in some ways, more intimately than Holly has, sure to be playing on her adorable, over-thinking nerd's mind.
It's why she decides to head straight over to Holly's place instead of going for a drink with the gang at The Penny, bag of Chinese take-out in one hand and a bottle of red wine in the other.
Once she arrives at Holly's townhouse, Gail lets herself in without knocking as she's grown accustomed to doing over the years of their friendship, her well loved and worn key being tucked straight back away in her jacket pocket – settling back into its home next to the gold-plastic ring – once she's safely inside. The house is quiet and still, lit only by the moonlight creeping in through the blinds and illuminating the hallway. Gail shrugs out of her jacket and takes off her boots, her ears picking up the faint rhythm of fingertips scuttling across a keyboard as she moves further into the house towards the living-room, indicating Holly's location.
She's not surprised to find Holly dressed in her favourite sweats, her hair loosely pulled back into a messy ponytail, and her long legs, and fluffy socked covered feet, stretched out across the couch as she works away on the laptop balancing in her lap.
Not wanting to startle Holly with her unexpected presence, Gail simply raps her knuckles softly on the living-room door to draw her attention, and smiles as Holly's head whips around to spot her.
Holly's eyes widen in surprise at the sight of her, her eyebrows knitting together in confusion. "Hey," she says slowly, almost as if she's not convinced that her eyes aren't deceiving her. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be hanging out at The Penny?"
"Hey back," Gail greets in return with a small smile, and holds up the bag of Chinese take-out for Holly to see. "Nah, I prefer your company to theirs, Lunchbox. Besides, I thought you might fancy some yummy food and delicious wine to aid you as you tackle your report. How's it going by the way? Let me see."
She knows it's probably a little cruel to come at Holly full throttle, but Gail really feels that the only way they're going to stop skirting around each other is if she grabs the bull by the horns, so to speak, and forces them to deal with this thing head on for once. Holly worries her bottom lip between her teeth guiltily as Gail settles the food and wine down on the coffee table, and kneels down by the couch to reach for the laptop without waiting for Holly to respond to her question, twisting it in Holly's lap so she can see what Holly is really working on.
Her heart clenches as her eyes read over the information displayed on the screen, and she flicks her eyes across to meet Holly's with her lips turned downwards sadly. "Why are you looking up divorce lawyers again, Hol?" she asks gently as Holly's eyes shimmer sadly, her mouth pursing into a thin, tight line. "Especially with all the stress you've been under this week, I thought we were going to wait until after you published your research?"
Holly shrugs back at her, her eyes darting away. "I thought you might want to get it sorted quicker now..." she confesses in a low murmur, twisting the laptop back towards herself and away from Gail's prying eyes.
"Why would you think that?" Gail questions daringly, hoping that maybe, just maybe, Holly will give her something, even if it's just a small sign. "Just because my mom set me up with my old high school boyfriend?"
"No, but because you actually seemed interested in him," Holly replies quietly, her eyes finding Gail's again and offering her a small, forced smile. "I don't want you to be trapped with me if you're wanting to get back out into the dating world."
There's a heaviness to Holly's smile, almost as if the act is crushing her, and for the first real time, Gail sees the jealousy she caught a glimpse of in Holly's eyes transforming into honest, unbridled hurt and sorrow. There's a yearning in Holly's gaze that sends a shiver down her spine, making Gail's own heart pang achingly to know that on some level Holly is struggling with her feelings too, and that she's added to the burden of that by allowing herself to bring Henry into the mix.
Jealousy is an ugly creature, a dark and festering disease that slowly consumes you and eats away at your mind, body and soul from the inside out. It's a nasty, crippling, exhausting emotion to fight against, and she doesn't want Holly to suffer it for a second longer. Gail thinks that maybe it's a little unfair of her to think that just because she's done working her feelings out for Holly, doesn't necessarily mean Holly is done working her own out just yet.
She obviously needs more time, and that's something Gail, with patience and understanding, can grant her willingly.
Gail reaches for the laptop once more, carefully closing the screen and reaches to curl her fingers around Holly's, lovingly brushing her thumb across the back of Holly's knuckles. "I'm not interested in Henry like that, Holly, or going back out on my mother's horrid set-ups," she reassures earnestly, her smile soft.
"You're not?" Holly blinks back at her, her gaze staring fixedly back at Gail as she lets her eyes desperately search over Gail's face for the truth, her voice tinged with relief as her fingers subconsciously squeeze back at Gail's own hopefully.
Gail shakes her head and lets her smile grow as the corners of Holly's mouth begin to twitch up into her adorable crooked grin. "I'm honestly not, Hol. He's just an old friend, and it was just nice to catch up with him."
"You're sure that's all he is to you?" Holly retaliates, doubt still lingering slightly in her eyes. "Because you seemed rather cosy together at the party for him to be just a friend."
"Henry is just a friend, I promise. An old friend, who knows me well perhaps, but that's all, there's nothing going on between us," Gail replies promisingly, shifting slightly on her knees as she takes the laptop from Holly's lap and sets it down on the coffee table. Holly sits up at her movement, swinging her legs down off the couch and creating a space for Gail to settle down next her. "Besides, even if he was interested in me, which he's not, I'm a happily married woman," Gail adds with a grin, bumping their shoulders assuredly and reaching for Holly's hand again, letting her fingers slide between Holly's own this time and affectionately intertwining them.
Holly smiles shyly in return, a slight flush rising in her cheeks as her eyes fall down to study their linked hands. "Good," she breathes deeply, the tension seemingly leaving her as she rubs her thumb along Gail's and looks back to her with contentment. "I'm glad – not that I don't want you to date and be happy, because I do – I just really don't have the time to or want to get divorced right now."
"I'm not going anywhere, Hol," Gail murmurs comfortingly, feeling Holly's body relaxing more and more against her own, her head coming to rest against Gail's own. "I told you before, there's no rush. I'm honestly good with how things are at the moment."
"You sure?" Holly repeats quietly. "I know asking to you to wait in this weird limbo is asking a lot."
Gail lifts her head, forcing Holly to mirror the action and lift her own until she's staring deeply back into Gail's eyes. "Holly, you're my favourite person in the whole world," she whispers softly. "I'd do anything for you, including being your wife for as long as you want and need me to be."
Holly blinks back at her for a quiet moment, almost as if she can't quite believe how wonderful and sweet Gail is being yet again, her eyes brimming with appreciative and awe-filled tears. "I really do adore you, I hope you know that, Gail," Holly murmurs lovingly in response, her voice thick with emotion as she leans in to press a lingering kiss to Gail's cheek.
"I adore you right back, Lunchbox," Gail replies with a tender smile, letting her own lips dust a kiss to Holly's temple, and feeling her heart swell as Holly's eyes flutter closed at the touch. Holly looks a little overwhelmed when Gail pulls back, and so she decides to lighten the mood, by jesting, "Besides, this is probably the happiest marriage I'll ever have, so I intend to enjoy every second of it while it lasts."
Holly smiles and shakes her head slightly in response as Gail wiggles her eyebrows playfully, but then, "I hope you don't mean that, Gail," Holly admonishes seriously, her voice soft and full of adoration, despite knowing Gail is just joking around to try and cheer her up, "because you, more than anyone I know, deserve a life filled with love and happiness."
"I have both of those things in my life right now," she says just as softly, the words coming naturally to her as she peers intensely into Holly's eyes and lets her fingers flex against Holly's own, tightening their hand-hold even more.
"You know what I mean," Holly mumbles, bumping their shoulders together once more as Gail nods knowingly, her cheeks still blushing bashfully at the sentiment regardless, and then in a whisper adds, "Me too."
Holly's eyes duck away from hers again then, dropping down to stare at her lap, and Gail knows how overwhelming all these new feelings are, and so without wanting to bombard Holly with too much too soon, she frees her hand from Holly's and gives her back a bit of space to gather her thoughts.
She's okay with letting Holly break their moment for now, knowing that she's learned far more from their interaction tonight than she ever dreamed to, and so Gail leans forward and reaches for the food, passing a carton over to Holly with a smile that promises her best friend that everything will be okay.
They spend the rest of the night just like old times, curled up together on the couch, watching Star Wars as they share the wine, Holly spurting random behind the scenes knowledge as they watch, and Gail rolling her eyes affectionately, teasingly calling her a 'giant sci-fi nerd' under her breath until Holly pinches at her side in playful retaliation, both of them content to stop over-thinking and just be for a little while.