Wreck-Creation for Fun and Profit
A Puella Magi Madoka Magica Fanfic by
Nate Grey (xman0123-at-aol-dot-com)
Chapter 3: Onee-chan
It wasn't that Madoka was having trouble getting rid of her opponents. It was just that they kept teleporting in, one after another, no matter how many she destroyed. And the more different versions of Walpurgisnacht she destroyed, the more displeased she became. She was seriously starting to question whether it had been a good idea to tell Kriem to hold back. She had known, of course, that Incubators had no conscience. But this was an excellent reminder of why numerous beings with no conscience doing anything together was a horrible idea.
The worst part was that the Incubators weren't even the ones doing the teleporting anymore. The witches themselves had that ability. Madoka wondered, not for the first time, how many Homuras were lost to accomplish that. Or girls just like Homura, who had suffered needlessly for such a cruel goal to be realized. She could easily find out, of course. But, she had found out very quickly that there were some things that she was better off keeping herself from knowing. Just the things she did have to know were bad enough at times.
"I should have wished for something."
Homura paused, gripping Charlotte's Grief Seed tightly in her hand. She wanted so much to turn around and face Madoka, but knew it would be a bad idea. Seeing Madoka cry... it could easily undo her.
It had been a horrible idea, to bring Madoka back to her apartment, after Tomoe Mami's death. But the alternative had been to leave her with Miki Sayaka, who would only push Madoka further along the path of becoming a magical girl. Madoka had seen that it was Mami's choice to keep Homura from interfering in the battle. Sayaka couldn't have known that, and when she had tossed it in Homura's face, accusing her of being opportunistic, Madoka had actually stepped forward and defended Homura. Sayaka had very nearly hit her, but at the last second, changed her mind and stormed off.
"I waited too long," Madoka whispered, her voice breaking. "Right?"
Homura shook her head. "There are certain fates that some people simply cannot escape, no matter how the circumstances change, Madoka. You have no real way of knowing when someone's time is up. Even if a witch doesn't intervene, it may be that a person is not meant to live beyond a certain point. So you should not blame yourself for the death of another. Not unless you held the murder weapon in your hands."
"But it isn't right!" Madoka cried.
"It isn't," Homura agreed softly. "But little is, in this world. You still have your own life, Madoka. If you want to do something for Tomoe Mami, then live it to the fullest. Cherish your family and the time you still have. The time that she gave you. Live for her, as if she were still by your side. I am sure that would have made her happy."
"Yes," Madoka murmured. "It would have. We were... going to be partners. So she wouldn't be alone anymore, and so my life would finally have a purpose."
"Don't say that!" Homura snapped, grabbing Madoka's shoulders and shaking her. "Your life has always had a purpose! You've just been too blind to realize it! Even if you never save a single person, your life has all the meaning it needs to! Don't you know how much your family and friends treasure your existence? Don't you ever cheapen it by saying it doesn't matter! I won't allow that!"
Madoka stared at her for a long moment. Then, without warning, she gave Homura a hug.
Homura stiffened at once. "What are you doing?"
"This is what I do, when someone tells me they love me," Madoka replied softly.
"I don't lo-"
"You shouldn't lie, Homura-chan," Madoka interrupted, squeezing her tightly. "Not to someone you love. Not unless you have a very good reason."
Homura hesitated, uncertain of what to do. She hadn't planned for this. Things were getting off track, and she needed order if she was going to save Madoka's life. On the other hand, Madoka was finally listening to her. Maybe this was for the best. Perhaps now she could be reasoned with.
"Do you trust me, Madoka?" Homura asked.
"I want to," Madoka admitted. "You protected me, and it's obvious now that you care about me, more than I realized. I guess it depends on what you want to tell me."
Then and there, Homura told Madoka everything. How magical girls became witches. How Walpurgisnacht would doom or destroy any magical girls left standing. How many times Homura had ventured back into the past, trying to save her life. How she had failed every time, but never given up hope that Madoka could be saved.
To her credit, Madoka did not deny it or freak out. She merely sat quietly, sipping the glass of water that Homura had gotten for her. Finally, she gave Homura another hug, and a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you, Homura-chan. For everything you've done for me."
"I didn't do this for your gratitude."
"No, but you deserve it all the same."
Homura knew then that she had failed yet again. "You know what you're going to wish for, now."
"Yes," Madoka confirmed. "I'm so sorry. I know this isn't what you wanted for me."
Homura sighed. "I guess it wouldn't hurt to at least hear what the wish is before I reset."
Madoka shook her head. "If this works, you won't ever have to reset again, Homura-chan."
"That sounds like quite a wish, if you expect it to do that much good," Kyubey commented as he walked out from behind Homura's couch. "I have to admit that you've made me curious, Madoka. Tell me, what is the wish that you would trade your soul for?"
"I wish for the power to exchange lives, one for another, as often as I desire. If my loved ones die, I'll call them back, and send someone else to take their place in death. I never want the lives of my loved ones to be beyond my reach."
Kyubey's eyes flashed. "That wish... is really something, Madoka. Well done."
"No, it's horrible!" Homura cried. "Madoka, you can't want-!"
"But I do, Homura-chan," Madoka said, her voice like steel. "I want Mami-san back, and I don't ever want to lose her, you, or anyone else I care about. This is the only way." She extended her hand to the Incubator, who hopped onto her shoulder. "So can you grant my wish, Kyubey?"
Kyubey nodded. "But of course! I assume you want to test it out right away."
"Yes," Madoka said softly. "Yes, I do."
Homura had never seen anyone brought back from the dead before, so she had no idea what to expect. And yet, when Mami came awake with a violent jerk and began screaming hysterically, somehow, Homura was not at all surprised.
But really, they should have expected it. If Mami's last memory was what Homura thought it was, no wonder she was terrified. Homura was just glad they'd chosen to revive Mami in an abandoned building, rather than in Mami's apartment, or Homura's.
It took Madoka almost ten minutes of holding Mami to get her to stop screaming, followed by an hour of more holding before Mami stopped sobbing long enough to form whole words. And even then, most of them were along the lines of, "But I'm dead!"
Homura kept her distance, figuring that her presence would not be a source of comfort. On the other hand, Mami was understandably preoccupied, and barely even looked at her. Rather, Madoka would not let Mami look anywhere else, because Mami seemed to be somewhat comforted by the sight of Madoka's face.
Eventually.
After almost two hours, Homura decided that something needed to be said. It was late, Madoka had a family that would be worried about her, and Mami... well, something had to be done with her. Especially since she was clearly in no condition to be left on her own.
"What are you going to do with her, Madoka?"
Madoka was silent for a long moment, simply stroking Mami's hair and staring straight ahead. Finally, she gently grasped Mami's face and locked their gazes. "Mami-san, you'll come home with me."
Mami blinked slowly, as if she didn't understand. "But... my apartment-"
"You'll come home with me," Madoka insisted.
Mami stared at her, then slowly nodded. Even if she wanted to disagree, Homura suspected she would need be... more like she had been, before she died. But part of that Mami was gone, possibly forever. And even if she came back, she would never be the same again.
After all, this was no near-death experience, like the one Mami had recovered from due to her wish. This was an actual death, which no one was meant to come back from. And hopefully, it would be the only death that Madoka would ever try to reverse.
Madoka never said who she had chosen to take Mami's place in death. And Homura, for one, thought it was better not to ask. It was no one obvious, at least. No one even remotely close to Madoka. No one she would miss.
Madoka didn't tell lies, or do bad things. So when she came home late, with a friend from school that neither of her parents knew, there was only a little resistance. It increased considerably when she asked if this friend could stay over that night, and possibly longer.
"Who is this girl?" Junko demanded. "Why haven't we met her before?"
"Kaa-san, I told you," Madoka pleaded. "She's a new friend from school, and she's really sweet. I would have brought her over eventually, but she's an orphan and I thought she might be sensitive about meeting my whole family all at once."
"Then why are you suddenly convinced that she needs to spend the night?"
"She's having a really rough time right now. She lost her family in a car accident, and just recently, she had another... near-death experience. I feel responsible, because she was protecting me at the time. She's really shaken up, and I couldn't just leave her all alone."
"Where was she living before?"
"She has an apartment, and if things don't work out for her here, then she could always go back there. But even if she did, I'd want to go with her. She needs me, kaa-san. This is really important to me."
"Is she a danger? To herself, or others?"
Madoka blinked and looked at her father, who had been silent until that unexpected question. "Of course not. Why would you even-?"
"Madoka," he said gently. "I don't doubt that your friend is a nice girl. I can't imagine you being friends with a girl that wasn't. But these things... change people. And your friend looks as if she's been changed. Considerably. And I know you mean well, but we have to think about Tatsuya."
All three glanced at the couch, where Tatsuya, unable to sleep through his mother's outburst at discovering an unexpected guest, was dazedly working in a coloring book. Mami was seated next to him, doing the same, though with a disturbingly detached look on her face. It was worst for Madoka, who was sure that Tatsuya would have adored Mami as she had been before.
"I'll watch her every minute, tou-san," Madoka promised. "I'll even keep my room locked, if that-"
"I don't think you need to go quite that far," her father interrupted. "Don't forget, we have two children we'd like to keep safe." He reached over and squeezed her arm gently.
Madoka caught his hand and returned the squeeze with a smile. "Can she stay? Please?"
Junko groaned. "Does it have to be with you? She can't stay with Sayaka or Hitomi?"
"Hitomi didn't really know her, and Mami-san is closest to me. I think I'm the best one to help her. And she's already here."
"Fine," Junko hissed. "But both of you are going to school tomorrow."
Madoka hesitated. "About that..."
"Madoka, that part is not negotiable."
"I'm going, I'm going!" Madoka insisted. "It's just, she's one grade higher than me, but after what happened, I think being in a class without friends might be too much for her. As far as I know, Sayaka and I were her only friends. I know you and Saotome-sensei are old friends, so maybe you could ask her if Mami-san could sit in on my classes?"
Junko shook her head. "You really think your friend wants to be a year behind in school?"
Madoka glanced at Mami worriedly. "Kaa-san, at this point, she'll be lucky to only be a year behind. If she doesn't like it, I'll convince her."
"Well, I can't promise anything, Madoka. But I'll ask."
"Thanks so much, kaa-san." Madoka thought she had a pretty convincing speech as she approached Mami. But all thought left her mind when she saw what Mami had drawn. To the uninformed, it probably just looked like a smiley face still in progress. But smiley faces didn't have pointy noses, or long, snake-like bodies. And this one was missing its mouth.
But only because Mami had been too terrified to add the teeth.
Mami was afraid of going to sleep that night. It was nothing Madoka hadn't foreseen. Actually, Homura had been the one to suspect that, and that had been about as much as she'd been willing to get involved. Madoka didn't like it, but she understood Homura's reluctance, and didn't hold it against her. She was only alive because of Homura. The same way Mami was now only alive because of Madoka. Homura had taken responsibility for Madoka, and Madoka could do no less for Mami. If she had to sacrifice certain things, so be it.
Anyway, sharing her bed with Mami was no real sacrifice. Madoka had fallen asleep with a small mountain of stuffed animals for years. Mami was nicer to hold, simply because she was both alive and Mami. Madoka could almost pretend that Mami had never died at all. Almost.
"I'm sorry, Kaname-san," Mami whispered in the middle of the night. "For being a burden."
Madoka's arms immediately tightened around Mami, and she pressed her face into Mami's back. "You are not a burden, Mami-san. You're my partner, my precious friend, and someone I would do anything to keep at my side."
"But I-"
"Please don't leave me again," Madoka whispered.
Mami swallowed hard, gently gripping the shaking hands around her middle. "That isn't up to me, Kaname-san. You know that."
"I know no one can avoid death. But I saw that picture you drew. I know you can't forget... but don't you go looking for it, you hear me? Promise me that you won't kill yourself!"
"We are finally a magical girl duo," Mami sighed. "Danger will come to us. I can only promise that I will not seek to die outside of battle. But if you are asking me not to risk this life you have given me, for you or something equally important? I cannot agree to that."
They talked a little more that night, before they finally fell asleep. Madoka insisted that Mami was part of her family now, and would address her as such from then on. Mami, at Madoka's request, agreed to never use her family name again. They were, after all, far too close for that now.
Mami had no trouble falling asleep at night, in Madoka's arms, and no nightmares ever came to her while she did. Those only seemed to find her during the day from then on.
Madoka had feared that school would be rough. There were entirely too many people that Mami would have to interact with, and even people who hadn't known her were sure to notice something was off about her.
It began to go downhill even before they reached school.
Madoka had been so concerned about Mami, she had completely forgotten to warn Sayaka about Mami's return.
And when Sayaka and Hitomi turned to greet Madoka, only to find Mami with her, they reacted accordingly. Hitomi hurried to introduce herself, and Sayaka... turned completely white and very nearly fainted at the sight of her dead friend no longer being dead. Or a half-chewed corpse. Frankly, Madoka was still amazed that her power to bring back the dead apparently included a free pass on a completely restored body. Although there was a very faint pink scar along Mami's neck that resisted all attempts to conceal it with cosmetics. Anyway, Mami was understandably very sensitive about anyone other than Madoka touching her there.
To Sayaka's credit, she did not burst into tears and throw herself at Mami. Instead, she very slowly approached Mami and stretched out a trembling hand.
Knowing that Sayaka needed to confirm her existence, Mami gently took her hand. Sayaka very nearly did cry then, and she could certainly no longer deny herself the need for a hug. Mami allowed this, even encouraged it. But, of course, Sayaka had seen her die. So it was inevitable that Sayaka's hand wandered up to Mami's neck.
About the best thing that could be said for Mami's reaction was that Madoka stopped her before she could attempt to transform and shoot Sayaka. Still, Hitomi was officially scared of Madoka's new friend, and Sayaka perhaps would have been, if she had not figured out very quickly what must have happened. Once Hitomi had run away very quickly, Sayaka apologized to Mami. And then she made her feelings very clear.
"You need to let Mami-san go, Madoka. If this is how she has to be now... just let her go. She deserves to rest in peace, after all she's done. She doesn't belong here anymore."
"I can't do that," Madoka told her.
Sayaka frowned at her. "I know losing her was... hard. Believe me, I know. I can't stop regretting that I didn't make a wish to save her before she died. But she did, and once she did, it was too late to bring back the Mami-san that we knew. She won't ever be that person again. So if you won't let her go, then at least do me one favor. When I die, let me stay that way. Because if you bring me back like this, I don't think I could be your best friend anymore, Madoka. And I wouldn't want to live at all, if I couldn't be with you every day."
Madoka stared at her in shock. "Sayaka, I-"
"Please think about it, Madoka," Sayaka interrupted. "Think long and hard about this. I don't want to see Mami-san die again, either. But this isn't really living. And you know it's not fair to her."
It was the last time that Sayaka and Madoka had a meaningful conversation, and the last time they spoke as friends at all.
Whatever Madoka's mother had said to Saotome-sensei had obviously worked. She briefly introduced Mami as Madoka's tutor, and no one truly familiar with Madoka's grades, which were only slightly above average at best, questioned her need for one. And though the material covered in the class was essentially a review for Mami, she was happy to focus on it at all the same. Schoolwork was something that had never been especially challenging for her, and it kept her mind from wandering to... less pleasant thoughts. Mostly, anyway. At any rate, Madoka probably would need tutoring before long, if the number of anxious glances she aimed at Mami were any indicator.
Lunchtime was considerably more challenging. Mami didn't actually mind being around other students, much. She had never been fond of being in a crowd, and preferred to keep to herself for the most part. But that would require being away from Madoka, something she didn't like to even think about. No, the real issue was the eating. Rather, so many people eating at once, without any thought as to how very easy it was to kill in the process. Just the sight of watching someone's mouth as they ate was enough to give her chills. And she would have absolutely nothing to do with bright, multi-colored food anymore. The sight of a cupcake had very nearly made her sick to her stomach, and she had actually recoiled from a girl crunching too loudly on a carrot stick.
Sayaka, of all people, came to her rescue. With no explanation, she simply grabbed Mami's hand and dragged her to an empty classroom to finish lunch, leaving Madoka to follow along. Mami tried to express her thanks, but Sayaka shook her head firmly, and spent the rest of the time looking anywhere but at Madoka. It was extremely awkward, and still Mami was more comfortable than she had been in the crowded cafeteria. It hurt, to know they were fighting because of her, but at least Sayaka was still willing to be in the same room as them.
Mami had been worried about how she would perform do in her first team battle. If there was ever a time when memories of her death would come rushing back, it would be then. It turned out to be pointless to worry: Madoka's arrows shot down any and all familiars before they could get anywhere near Mami, to the point where there was really nothing for her to do. Normally, that would have left Mami to deal with the witch...
...except that Sayaka beat her to it. And despite being a first-timer, she really seemed to be a natural. Once she had used the Grief Seed to clean her Soul Gem, she offered the Grief Seed to Madoka, who had little choice but to accept, with all the magic she'd used.
"I can't stop you two from going out on witch hunts," Sayaka told them, "and I'll always share my Grief Seeds. But know that I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure that I'm the only one of us who ever even sees a witch again. If you don't have the sense to stay safe, then I'll protect you myself."
At the time, it had really seemed like more of Sayaka's usual cocky attitude. But she proved good on her word. The next time Madoka and Mami saw a witch, it was only because she had just hatched from Sayaka's own Grief Seed.
Mami took aim with her musket, but was again forced to dive aside as a giant wheel crashed into the ground only inches from where she'd been standing. She landed hard, driving the air out of her body, and certainly would have been finished, had she been alone.
She was not: Madoka, Kyoko, and even Homura, were all there, fighting just as hard. With that many magical girls, a single witch should have been finished in no time. But the battle was dragging on, because no one wanted to admit what was obvious.
They didn't want to destroy Sayaka, but they had no idea how to save her.
For her part, Sayaka had given no sign that she recognized them at all. No, that was wrong. There was one sign that she knew exactly who at least one of them was. Every single one of her attacks had been aimed at Mami. The others had no idea what to make of this. But the longer it went on, the clearer it became to Mami.
There was something left of Sayaka in there. And she was still trying to send Mami on to the next life, the only way she knew how. Neither of them belonged in this world anymore. The sooner someone else accepted that, the sooner all of this unnecessary pain would end.
Hoping she would be understood without words, Mami shot one of her ribbons toward Homura, who grabbed it and immediately stopped time.
"Are you finally ready to end this pointless game?" Homura asked.
"Not quite, Akemi-san. But I am willing to see my part through to the end. I'll take care of Miki-san, so make sure the others get out safely. And Madoka... tell her I'm sorry."
Homura stared at her. "I always thought Madoka bringing you back was a mistake... until now. You have my respect, Tomoe Mami. If you succeed, I will not allow Madoka to revive you again."
"Thank you. But the only way you can do that, without hurting her. is if you agree to be there for her. So I hope you're prepared for that."
"You might surprised, what I am prepared for," Homura responded.
When time resumed its flow, there was a loud roar, and the girls had to shield their eyes as the enormous blast from Mami's Tiro Finale slammed into the witch, obliterating the bottom half of her body. She fell with a crash, and the orchestra of her familiars stopped playing at once. Stunned, scared, or otherwise, it was hard to say which.
"Sayaka," Madoka whispered, shaking her head as the witch struggled to rise and failed, collapsing to the ground again. "No..."
"I won't kill her, Madoka-chan," Mami promised. "I won't allow her to curse anyone, either. But I'm afraid that means we can't be a duo anymore. At last, I know how I can use this second life to deliver justice to someone I care for. And I'm happy I got to be with you again, if only for a little while." Mami sent out a virtual storm of ribbons, tightly binding the witch.
Kyoko carefully picked up Sayaka's limp, human body. She stared at Mami's back for a long moment, then turned and ran.
"We should go," Homura said, taking Madoka's hand. "We'll be trapped here, if the barrier closes now."
Madoka couldn't bring herself to move, however, and Homura finally just carried her away.
Once the other girls were gone, the familiars began to play again. Perhaps they understood Mami's purpose, and even agreed with it. All she knew was that the music seemed to soothe the witch, who stopped struggling to escape.
Mami sighed and sat down to listen. "It's beautiful here, Miki-san. I think... this is a good place to meet our end, together."
When the barrier was forced open, Mami thought it had to be Homura, coming to see if the task was done. She was more than a little surprised to see that it was Kyoko, with a determined look in her eyes.
"Sakura-san? Why are you here alone?" Mami asked.
"Just sitting here is no way to live, or die." Kyoko held out her Soul Gem. "But if it's freedom from this cursed existence that you really want, I can give it to you both."
"You know what will happen to you," Mami whispered.
"Some things are more important," Kyoko replied. She turned to the witch. "You agree, Sayaka?"
The witch did not respond, and neither girl expected her to. But what she did do was drag herself closer to them, and not a single familiar moved to interfere, which was telling in itself.
"I do feel bad for Madoka, though," Kyoko admitted. "She's got the power to bring us all back... and none of us would thank her for it. Bet she regrets her wish now."
"You know, I really don't think she does," Mami replied. "She'd do it again, and again. She can't let go. Not anymore. Especially not with what we're about to do."
"So you want out?" Kyoko asked. "Last chance to run."
"No. I don't want to cause Madoka pain. But the alternative is to allow a witch I'm responsible for cause countless others pain. I'll gladly die again to prevent that."
"To the end, then... Mami-san."
Mami managed a final smile as Kyoko's Soul Gem pulsed once, and then became an ever-expanding fireball.
Tatsuya was confused. There was a stranger sitting at the table, eating breakfast with his family. He was not by nature a shy child, but this bothered him. No one seemed willing to mention it, however, so he decided to bring it to their attention. Or at least, to the attention of the person who he felt sure would it explain things in a way he could understand.
Madoka looked up at once when his tiny hand plucked at her sleeve. She gave him a smile that did not seem entirely okay to him. "What is it, Tatsuya?"
He thought about his problem carefully, and summed it up as best he could. "Where Ma-chan?" He did not like the look that came over his sister's face. She looked... hurt.
"She... went away, Tatsuya. She's not coming back."
Tatsuya pouted. Then he glanced uncertainly at the stranger, who was now watching him carefully.
Madoka gently squeezed his hand. "Tatsuya, this is my friend. Her name is Homura. Can you try to say that?"
Tatsuya pouted again. That was a hard name. Ma-chan's was easier, and she had hair like golden ribbons. Still, he would try for his sister. "Ho-chan?"
The stranger flinched, glanced at Madoka's pleading expression, and sighed. "Very good, Tatsuya."
Maybe Ho-chan was okay, he decided then. Even if she didn't have hair like ribbons. Reassured, he went back to eating his breakfast, and only smeared half of it on his face in the process.
Madoka ate quickly and then excused herself, saying she and Homura needed to get to school a little early. She kissed both of her parents, and then hugged Tatsuya, which was not really unusual for her. But even Tatsuya noticed that Madoka held onto him far longer than she normally did. Tatsuya didn't really mind hugs, but like most children, he had a short attention span and was easily bored. So when he decided that Madoka was being too affectionate, he began to whine and squirm.
Madoka did not release him. "I'm sorry, Tatsuya," she murmured. "Just a little more? Please?"
Tatsuya pouted, but allowed himself to be hugged a little longer.
Madoka finally let go, gently smoothing his hair. "I'm sorry," she said again, giving him a watery smile. "I just wanted you to have an extra hug. From Ma-chan. That's okay, right?"
Tatsuya nodded. Ma-chan's hugs had been nice. Even though sometimes she cried on him a little or trembled too much. She had been fun to color with, and although he still had no idea why or how people got married, he could see himself marrying Ma-chan. Especially if it meant she would come back.
"We should get going, Madoka," Homura said gently. She bowed to Madoka's parents, then hesitated for a long moment before finally reaching out and tickling Tatsuya, briefly but effectively, under his chin. Before he really had a chance to appreciate it, Homura had grabbed a stunned Madoka and all but dragged her through the front door. This did nothing to block out the volume of Madoka's squeal of how cute Homura had just been, followed immediately by heated denials and a threat to demonstrate just how painful a pistol-whip could be if anyone found out about what had just taken place.
"And this friend is supposed to be better than the last one she brought home?" Tatsuya heard his mother ask in a loud whisper.
"She doesn't seem haunted like Mami was, at least," his father replied.
"That probably has more to do with her being scarier than any ghost. I don't care if she doesn't have a gun, anyone who knows what a pistol-whip feels like-"
"I'm sure she was just exaggerating. Where would a girl that age even get a gun? It's not like she could just walk up to someone and take it from them..."
"What changed your mind about us being friends, Homura-chan?" Madoka asked as they walked to school.
Homura stared straight ahead. "I was always your friend, Madoka. You just couldn't see it."
"Then what changed your mind about us being close friends?"
"Something Tomoe Mami said to me." Accurately predicting Madoka's next question, Homura quickly added, "Something I would prefer to keep to myself."
"O-Oh. Okay. Sorry I asked."
Homura sighed. "Don't be." She reached out and took Madoka's hand. "We are friends, Madoka. I will remind you of that as many times as I need to. And I am not so sensitive that you need to apologize for asking a personal question."
Madoka slowly shook her head. "You say that, but you're the one friend I couldn't bring back, if you decided to use your power to escape me. So of course I'm worried about hurting your feelings. You could just reset anytime you wanted to."
Homura glared at her. "Do you really think I would use my power so senselessly? That I would abandon you over a common misunderstanding?"
"I didn't mean to offend you, I just-"
"I am the only friend you have left that can protect you, Madoka," Homura whispered. "That is not something I will simply forget. Indeed, it is something I am constantly thinking of with every passing moment. I have no other friends or duties to occupy my time. Everything I do is to preserve and prolong your existence. I would devote my life to you here and now, if it would please you. But understand that, given the scope of everything else I have done for you, I would consider it to be a meaningless gesture at best."
Madoka stared at Homura helplessly, and finally murmured, "I'm sorry?"
Homura shook her head and gently embraced Madoka. "No, I'm sorry. I'm scaring you again. Please, just trust that I would only abandon this timeline if there was simply no way for me to save you. And I have done everything I can to ensure that doesn't happen."
"That never changes anything, though, does it?" Madoka whispered.
"No," Homura admitted softly. "But that doesn't mean I'm going to give up. I will find a way to save you, Madoka. I promise that I will. Please, believe in me, in our friendship. That's all I ask."
Concluded in Chapter 4: Hatcher
Sometimes, a win doesn't feel like one. Sometimes, that's because it isn't. Kyubey reflects on the defeat of the Incubators... and then does exactly what you'd expect of one.
Endnotes:
That you can't (or aren't allowed, or shouldn't) wish people back from the dead has long been a "rule" where wishmaking is concerned. But Kyubey claims he can grant any wish. Although, he later implies there might actually be a less than perfect success rate, which is tied to the wisher's magical potential or karmic importance. In other words, no rewriting the universe if you're a nobody? Sounds harsh. But, I think it's safe to assume that for any Madoka existing within Homura's resets, there really are no limits after a certain point.
For a while, I considered it a major failing in Madoka that she didn't wish Mami back. But now I see it as a character study. Madoka only knew Mami for a short time, and was willing to remain tortured by the memory of her death, and the fact that she did nothing to reverse it. I see that as her willingness to sacrifice a potential long-term friendship that would have given both of their lives added meaning. And sacrificing is what Madoka does best. Put in a similar situation, however, Homura proved to be far more clingy. Some say too much, and I agree. But I figure, if I'm going to be mad at Homura for being too obsessive over the one person she loves, I can't be mad at Madoka for not being obsessive enough over someone she's still getting to know. BUT, just as there was a version of Mami who went nuts because she couldn't accept the truth, surely there could be a version of Madoka so traumatized by Mami's death that she was unable to let it go. Or there is now, anyway.