Chapter 3

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It had only been about another week before they were connected once more. Rey was cuddled up with her thin blanket in the cave, shivering more than normal. It was a much colder night than it had been lately and she honestly didn't know if she could handle it. She had still resisted telling Kylo about what had happened to her and how she was being treated currently while in care of the resistance.

She had been crying, something she never did, but everything was becoming so much. She was wearing thinner than she ever had when she had been alone on Jakku. There was no reason for her to feel ten times lonelier when she was surrounded by so many people, but with her treatment, it was almost worse than having to scavenge for her food. Here, it didn't matter how hard she worked, she was still given the same, small amounts.

Her ribs had become even more prominent though her muscle was still fighting through with her toned legs and arms as she continued to practice with her staff, they were just slightly skinnier than before. The only thing that really showed the weight loss was her ribs.

The familiar pull and loss of sound alerted her to his presence before she actually saw him. Upon feeling his gaze on her, she pulled the small blanket closer around her still shivering.

Looking down, she let her hair fall into her face as she furiously tried to wipe at the tears falling down her cheeks. They were making her even colder as she felt they could just freeze on her face if she wasn't careful.

"Rey…" He whispered softly, his heart breaking at the sight in front of him. Here was this powerful, wonderful girl, broken and beaten practically in front of him. "Why won't you come to me?" He added hopelessly, he knew it was a lost cause.

She may have promised to tell him when she was ready about what was going on, but clearly, she didn't feel ready at all and he was starting to break at seeing her in this condition.

"I just….I can't." She whispered back weakly, continuing to hide her face. She hadn't met his eyes once, knowing that if she did, she would cave and tell him everything. If she didn't see the compassion and worry in his eyes, she wouldn't have to think of him in the ways her heart longed for.

"No. You can. You just won't." He replied intending for it to come out colder than it did, but seeing her in this state made it impossible for him to be harsh with her.

Sighing, he ran a hand through his dark curls and grabbed one of his black long sleeved sleep shirts. Slowly, he walked over to her, sitting next to her like he had when the force had first connected them in this little place of their minds. He still couldn't see her surroundings, but based on what he heard and how she looked, she was out in the cold somewhere, clearly not inside of the base.

"Rey...at least….at least tell me...tell me what's happening." He pleaded with her, needing to at least know. He didn't ask for her location, knowing that it was pointless and would just lead to an argument. His eyes never left her as he slowly brought his hand up, worried he would scare her away if he moved too fast. He gently touched her hair covering her face before tucking it behind her ear, his hand moving to gently touch her neck, thumb soothingly rubbing against her jaw.

At the touch of skin on skin contact, Rey gasped silently, biting her lower lip as her resolve slowly crumbled, leaning into his touch before she slowly brought her eyes up to meet his. The spark that was once sparking and always ready for a fight was dimming, still there, but very weak. It broke his heart.

He wanted nothing more than to lean in and kiss her soft lips, finally falling into her, but he knew that now was not the right time. He wanted to truly be with her when they had their first kiss. Scared of her pulling away, he gently slid his hand down from her face to rest it on her hand that was over her knee, holding the blanket.

She missed his touch the second he removed his hand before she sighed as he instead just lightly held her hand. Her resolve completely shattered as unshed tears fell from her face.

"I...I...I'm outside...there...there weren't enough rooms, so...they...they um..theymademecomeoutsidebutIagreed." She jumbled all of her words together as she was scared of his reaction. Obviously being the Supreme Leader, he already disliked the resistance and she had a feeling this would just be the final nail in the coffin for him. She could feel all his emotions rolling off of him in waves, just like he could feel hers.

"What?" He asked, his voice deadly quiet, indicating that he had definitely understood what she said, but wanted to hear her more clearly.

She shook slightly as she felt the rage start to build within him. She let her last mental wall between them fall and he gasped as he felt an overwhelming wave of loneliness, cold, hunger, and sadness. He clenched his fist that was holding his long sleeved shirt and took a deep breath, not needing to scare her with his anger at the moment.

"They...They made me come outside since there's not enough room for everyone...I agreed, but it's not like I wanted too…" She whispered more clearly this time before hesitating to glance up at him. "I would stay in the common area, but they only allow certain people into the command rooms and the common area already houses a few who didn't have rooms, it would be too packed." She explained, knowing it would do nothing to calm the man beside her.

It truly was her choice to go outside, if she had wanted, she could have squeezed into the common area with some of the others, but she knew how the all felt about her and didn't think they would be all too happy with the idea. She wasn't allowed the command room, so that wasn't even an option.

"What else?" He ground out, his voice still dangerous and low, but she knew he wasn't angry at her. He gently squeezed her hand and kept the pressure there, his other hand

Turning white from how hard he was tightening his fist.

"At least calm down a little...please?" She whispered, slowly turning her hand over under his so that she could lace their fingers together. She ignored the tingling that transferred up her arm before biting her lower lip while she awaited his answer.

He wanted to fight and say he had every right to get angry at how she was being treated, especially with how powerful, strong, and beautiful she was. How could they treat her like this? He sighed, but slowly calmed himself little by little.

"Continue." He said tensely, letting her know he was as calm as it was going to get for now.

Letting out a sigh, she looked back down at the ground as she continued to hide herself under the blanket, glad he hadn't seen her ribcage and how bad it was at the moment.

"Well...um..due to having...limited..resources, they cut back on portions…" She whispered, not daring to go into further detail with that until she felt his reaction. His rage flared up once again as he looked over at her, raising an eyebrow slowly, silently telling her to continue.

"I...I..I don't think you wanna know how much they cut mine…" She whispered again, glancing at him quickly before pulling the blanket closer to her, letting go of his hand to hide her body from him.

"Rey…" He choked out her name, his voice sounding strained and angry, but she could see all the worry for her shining in his dark eyes. "How much?" He added, looking over her before furrowing his brows as he noticed her pulling the blanket closer to her.

"I'm lucky if I've had a half portion this week." She barely whispered, wondering if he could even hear her, but the overflow of his rage let her know that he had. He stood and started stalking around before he punched something wherever he was that made her jump, eyes finally looking up to meet his.

"Let me see." He whispered, his rage dissipating for the moment as his worry and love(something neither wanted to come to terms with yet) showed in his dark eyes.

Rey shook her head, scared of what would happen if he saw her, but the second she denied him, he kneeled in front of her.

"Please." He begged, his eyes shining with his own unshed tears and her breath was taken away from her. No one had ever looked at her like she did. When he looked at her, she felt her loneliness melt away and she felt like someone really cared and wanted her.

Slowly, she moved up onto her knees, still shivering, but she gently dropped the blanket. One could easily tell just from how her clothes had become looser, but her arms and legs still looked fine. She bit her lower lip before slowly lifting her tunic a little bit, knowing that's how he would see the most damage. It didn't seem very bad if you saw her completely covered.

She didn't know what had compelled her to show him, but whatever it was, was something she wanted to wait another day to process. It was clear to them both that after they had touched hands in the hut, they felt something for each other and Kylo was much quicker to accept that then Rey was.

His eyes gazed over her covered form and he could tell she looked a little thinner, but nothing too bad. However, that all changed as she lifted her shirt and he gasped, unable to help himself as he reached a hand out to her.

Gently, his bare hand touched her bare side, running up right underneath her breast band, feeling each and every one of her ribs, he could practically fit her in his hands if he tried.

"Rey." He mumbled, his voice sounded broken as a single tear fell down his cheek. He gently pulled her shirt back down for her, ignoring the stir of desire that stormed within him at the sight of her skin, wishing she had been removing her shirt for a different reason.

Glancing down at his hand, he remembered his long sleeved shirt, not knowing if it would work, but he tried. Slowly, he lifted the shirt out towards her, the smallest of smiles gracing his lips as she accepted it, allowing a small smile to grace her lips as well.

"Ben…" She said softly, about to thank him before their connection was abruptly brought to an end. She brought the shirt up to her face and took a deep breath, blushing slightly as it smelled exactly like him. Grabbing her blanket, she huddled up against the rock, hugging his shirt to her all night, crying silently as she thought of what would have been different if she would just say yes to him.

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