Composition
Iwanako,
I'm relieved to hear I'm not the only one nervous about entering the final year of my school life. I merely thought it was the transition into a new school that had me briefly on edge. Although that isn't to say the transition has been minor, or even easy.
Yamaku is certainly a different school from my previous High School. The atmosphere is certainly different. However, I have already made some wonderful new friends. I run every day with a girl in another class called Emi. She has had both her legs amputated below the knees and runs on special running prosthetics. However, I have never seen anybody run so fast in my entire life. She would leave Takumi in the dust!
The two people I sit next to are an exercise in contrasts. Shizune, is the president of the student council. Despite the fact that she is a deaf mute, her presence has to be felt to be believed. She is intelligent, forceful and tries her hardest to drag the best out of people. She is extremely competitive, yet also very childish and also has a very caring side. She is a very... complicated person. Her interpreter is a loud (emphasis on the loud), boisterous girl named Shiina. We all call her Misha. I think she definitely brings out Shizune's playful side. The two are tied at the hip.
Probably my closest friend is a girl in my class called Misaki. I find it odd writing that name as myself, and everybody in class refers to her by her surname. Her language is often immaculately polite, but she has an intense curiosity about well... everything. She loves horror and general interest in anything that makes most people uncomfortable.
Despite this, she is the only person I have ever confided the full story of what happened that winter day. She helped pull me out of the depression you were so correct in stating I was in. And encouraged me to write this to you.
And that brings me to the reason I am writing to you. I want to apologize. I was selfish. When I had the heart attack it was obvious I fell into depression. I had, as you keenly observed, given up on life. I was too busy feeling sorry for myself and my own situation to even think about what you were going through.
I didn't see you blaming yourself for what happened. I didn't see myself driving you away. You reached out to me, even through your own misery, and I ignored your hand. I abandoned you.
The doctors told me my heart was faulty since birth.
You didn't deserve any of that. None of this was your fault.
I think you are right. It is probably better if we don't see each other again. There is certainly too much baggage between the both of us. However, I wanted to write to you to let you know that I am doing well. I am happy. And I only wish the absolute best for you too.
Regards,
Hisao