Okay, so I started posting this story on Stealthy Stories over a year ago, but I thought I might try posting it here hoping to get a little more of a response. Anyway, this takes place after the Volpahart building. I always thought that Raph seeing himself as his enemy was something that should have been delved into a bit deeper. So here it is. I just hope it doesn't get too confusing since there are two Raphael's in this story.

I don't own 'em and as always, review please.

So sensei's got us sitting in a circle and telling him what happened. It's been two days since we rescued Angel's brother from that monster. Ugh! Still makes my skin crawl when I remember everything. I'd rather forget.
So Mike's done telling about his nightmares and now he's crying and apologizing to Leo. Geeze, when did this become group therapy? Great, they're huggin. That means I'm next. Damn. I don't want to do this crap. I don't want to tell them what I dreamt up in that monster's belly.
I haven't slept well since. Stupid nightmare keeps coming back. Only it's getting harder to fight my darker half. Last night, he won.
Why couldn't I have had some simple little dream like Donny or Mikey? They're worst nightmare was losing some one close. And Leo? True to form and being the perfect son, he conquers his nightmare.
I can't take this. I gotta' get outta' this. I don't wanna' talk right now.

Raphael stood up to leave the room and Splinter called out to him. "Raphael? Where are you going?" Splinter wasn't sure why his son would just get up to walk out. Yes he knew that Raphael often walked out in a rage when he lost his temper, but there was no such outburst preceding his actions this time.

Raphael stopped at the door leading out of his Sensei's room. He had his hand on the door but stopped when Splinter called him. Sighing heavily, he turned slightly to look at his father. His lack of sleep was starting to show on his face. Dark circles were starting to emerge under his eyes. His mouth was drawn. The energy that once flared in his eyes was just a remaining flicker. Splinter had never seen such a look on his son's face. It worried him.

"Sensei,…………….. I gotta' headache and I'm tired. Please, I just want to go lay down." The usually tough talking turtle was pleading with the rat, like a child asking for a toy.

Splinter had heard the desperation in his son's voice. "Very well," he nodded. "But we will continue this tomorrow Raphael."

"Yes Master Splinter," Raphael whispered as he left the room.

Splinter turned to the other three turtles. "Has Raphael confided in you my sons?" He knew it was a long shot, but he had to try. All three shook their heads to indicate no.

"Leonardo, what happened down there?"

"I don't know what happened Master Splinter." Leo answered. "He must have been having a pretty bad nightmare. When I found him he was all tensed up and I had a hard time waking him."

"I see," the old rat pondered for a moment over this new information. Of all his student's Raphael was the hardest to understand. He had a tendency to keep things bottled up and did not talk to anyone when things bothered him. "Perhaps it would be best if I spoke to your brother about this in private," Splinter suggested.

But Sensei," Michelangelo interrupted. "If we had to talk about our nightmares to everyone, why doesn't Raph? That's not very fair."

"I agree Michelangelo, but you must remember what your brother is like. These situations are not easy for him and he does not express himself freely like you or your brothers do." Splinter looked at Michelangelo and smiled. "Do you understand?" Michelangelo nodded yes.

"Very well my sons. You have all been through a trying time. I suggest that you take the evening off to relax."

All three turtles smiled at the suggestion. In unison, they stood and bowed to their sensei before leaving his room.

"So guys," Michelangelo asked as they walked down the hallway. "Do you want to do something together?" The look in his eyes was more than Donnatello or Leonardo could resist.

"You know Mikey; it has been awhile since we had a game night." Leonardo suggested.

Donnatello answered for his younger brother, "It's been years Leo. We haven't done that since we were kids. It could be fun."

"Hey!" Michelangelo's eyes brightened up. "Donnie, April got me the Pop Culture version of trivial pursuit for my birthday last month. We could play that. If you'll go get it off the shelf, I'll make the popcorn." Before either could answer him, Michelangelo happily raced to the kitchen to take care of the food and drinks.

Leo smiled at Donnatello, "Better go get it Don. I'll go clear some space off of the table."

Donnatello agreed and went to find the game Michelangelo suggested.

Leonardo saw Splinter emerge from his room. "Sensei? Would you like to join us?"

"Thank you Leonardo, but I wish to check on your brother."

Leonardo nodded. Donnatello came in and he and Leonardo began setting up the game. The smell of freshly buttered popcorn from the kitchen announced Michelangelo's entrance.

Splinter smiled as he walked away and onto the upper level of the lair. His son's laughter lightened his heart a little. But when he entered Raphael's room, his feelings changed. No matter how warm it is in the lair he thought to himself, it is always cold in here. He shut the door behind him and gave his eyes a moment to adjust.

Raphael was deep in a dream. It was one he wished he could leave and as much as he struggled to do so, he couldn't. He was back in the cavern's again, battling his evil self. As hard as he fought, he couldn't push his other self away. With every punch or kick that he made at his twin, it was blocked.
Raphael was becoming tired. His lack of sleep and restless nights were taking their toll on him, not just physically but mentally. He was having a hard time focusing on the fight and was beginning to lose. Things seemed to be hazy and move in a slow motion. It felt like he was in a fog. things were oddly silent as well.

The Evil Raphael kept pushing harder and harder until he had Raphael pinned against the wall. He had Raphael's sais in his hand and glared at him evilly, his eyes glowing red. Raphael tried to push him off and get away but he felt a sharp pain in both his shoulder and screamed. He felt something trickling down both his arms. He looked down to see that his other self had used his own sais to pin him to the wall. Raphael tried to raise his arms to pull the weapons out but was hit with a wave of pain and dropped his arms.

"Now," the turtle in Shredder's armor spoke. "You're going to behave like a good little turtle and not move. Maybe then, I won't kill you."

"What do you want?" Raphael asked weakly, his arms still screaming from the pain.

"I want what I've always wanted. To be free of your constraints. You have always kept me from going to far. Never wanting to lose your precious little temper and hurt your family." He leaned in and glared at Raphael. "Well guess what, you lose. I'm in control now not you. I will get revenge on all of them. On Leonardo for acting like he's better than me, On Donatello for acting like he's smarter than me, and on Michelangelo for simply annoying me."

Raphael's eyes widened with fear. "How could you, you...BASTARD!"

"Now, now," he responded calmly. "Don't let Sensei hear you talk like that. He might hit you on the head with his cane." He stopped and folded his arms, thinking. "Yes, the rat. For too long he has helped you to keep me in check. All that stupid meditation and training. I do owe him for that," and he turned to look at Raphael. "Don't I?" He placed a finger under Rapahel's chin and made him look eye to eye with him, "You see, I'm going to make things better for us. I get rid of them, they no longer bother us. We deserve power, you and I. We deserve to live better than this. And... I...will...make...them...PAY!"

Raphael woke up for practice the next morning, and much to his sensei's suprise, he was smiling.
"I am glad to see you feeling better Raphael," Splinter commented as the turtle joined his brothers. "Are you ready to begin?"

"Oh yes," he hissed as he rubbed the points of his sais. "I've been ready for a long time.:

All four turtles lined up, side by side, in front of their sensei. Not wanting to give himself away just yet, Raphael bowed, albeit, very curtly. Splinter took no notice of this and simply bowed back. He had his students run through a few katas to warm up and then had them pair up. "First," he said. "I would like Michelangelo and Leonardo to begin."

Raphael gave a short growl. STUPID RAT. I wanted a shot a leonardo. He looked up at Donnatello who came and sat down beside him, but said nothing. Instead he watched carefully as his two brothers fought, studying their moves closely.

After approximately ten minutes, Splinter called the match. "Very good Michelangelo. Your technique is improving and you are making excellent use of your gymnastic skills."

"Yes!" Michelangelo jumped up and pumped his fist in the air.

Splinter turned to the oldest, "Leonardo." Leonardo nodded. "As always, your stance is perfect. However, I would like for you to try this particular technique next time."

Rapahel watched impatiently as splinter demonstrated a new move to Leonardo. He rolled his eyes as Michelangelo sat down and he was sandwiched between Donnatello and the youngest turtle.

"Hey Raph!" Michelangelo asked excitedly. "Didja' see that bro'? I almost had Leo a couple of time there!"

Raphael glared at Michelangelo as he made the comment. "Shut up stupid," he said flatly.

Michelangelo leaned back in shock. "Hey Raph," he placed a hand on his brother's shoulder. "You okay? I thought you were in a pretty good mood this morning."

Rapahel immediately slapped the hand away and growled at Michelangelo. As a result the young turtle carefully got up and moved to the other side of Donnatello.

An evil laugh was all they heard out of him.

"Raphael, Donnatello," Splinter called out. "You are up next." Splinter motioned to the mat for the two of them to enter. Already noticing Raphael's abrupt change in behavior, Donnatello approached the mat nervously.

The match didn't last long. Raphael took advantage of Donnatello apprehension and immediately unleashed an aggressive attack. It was over within a minute's time. Raphael landed a series of punches on Donatello's chest and head until the turtle fell back on his shell. Raphael immediately launched himself at Donnatello, drawing his sais in his right hand.

Seeing what was happening, Splinter called out, "Raphael! Stop!"

Rapahel landed astride Donnatello with the point of his sais just touching his brother's neck. Donatello's eyes were wide with shock.

Rapahel grinned wide, "DAMN! That felt goooooood." He got up and stood back with his arms folded and watched as Splinter helped the fallen turtle get up.

"Are you alright my son?" Splinter asked.

"Yeah," he replied and rose shakily. Trying to laugh off what had just happened, Donnatello sheepishly grinned. "You definitely took me by surprise Raph."

Disgusted that he did not scare his brother as he intended, Rapahel's smile quickly faded into a look of distaste.

"Leonardo," Splinter spoke. "You will go up against Raphael." Splinter stepped of the mat and indicated for the two to face each other. Suspicious of his son's actions Splinter spoke again. "You will use your practice weapons this time."

Leonardo accepted the wooden versions of his katanas and gently placed his twin blades in their spot on the wall.

Rapahel loathed the idea of the two wooden sai, but snatched them up, deciding to go along with this for now. Looking around for an appropriate place to put his weapons, he smiled and flung them at Donnatello and Michelangelo's direction. Both ducked in response as the two weapons stuck into the wall, only a foot above their heads.

"Raphael!" Splinter called out.

Rapahel turned and walked over to face Leonardo on the mat. First I humiliate him the way he has humilitated me. Then, I kill him he thought to himself.

"No!" Raphael screamed from his position on the wall. "I won't let you!" and he tried unsuccessfully to pull himself free from the wall. Eventually the pain he experienced won and he had to stop.

Rapahel shook his head to try and clear out the extra voice. He staggered for a moment. "SHUT UP YOU SNIVELLING TWIT!" he yelled at himself.

"You okay bro'?" Leonardo asked.

Rapahel looked up and glared at him. "Let's go," he challenged, and walked over to the mat.

Leonardo looked at Splinter who nodded back in approval. Leonardo stepped back and pulled out one of his wooden swords. The two went at each other almost immediately. Splinter watched the whole time, making mental notes of how his sons were moving. He notice Rapahel's actions were more aggressive than usual but they also had a sense of cold calculation to them. That was when Raphael took a couple of cheap shots at Leonardo, causing him to stumble back.
"What's your problem Raph!" he called out angrily.

"You're my problem Leo," Raphael smiled back, trying to provoke his brother. As Raphael turned to make a roundhouse kick at Leonardo, Leo jumped and flipped over Rapahel. As he landed, he held his sword in a horizontal position infront of the angry turtle.

Raphael turned and stared at the sword, "Mistake," he glared. "Big Mistake." His eyes became small slits and without taking his eyes off of Leonardo, he grabbed the wooden sword in both hands. Rolling onto his shell, he flipped Leonardo over him. Before the oldest turtle could recover, Raphael firmly planted a kick to Leonardo's stomach. Donnatello and Michelangelo looked on in horror as his actions continued.

"Raphael! Enough!" Splinter yelled and he stepped between the two. "Donnatello, Michelangelo. See to Leonardo." Both turtles nodded and moved forward. "Raphael"

Raphael just stared at Splinter indifferently.

"I will speak with you in private," and he pointed to his room. "Now!"

Shrugging as if he had done nothing wrong, Raphael tossed the wooden sai off to the side and bent down over Leonardo. "I win" he whispered.

Inside his room, splinter spent much of the time lecturing Raphael on how he treated his brothers at practice. He tried to get Raphael to open up about his nightmare that occurred at the Volpahart building. Still nothing. The only response was a cold, silent stare. Splinter sighed; he walked over to Raphael and laid a hand on him as he spoke. "My son, I only wish to help you."

Raphael immediately jerked away and stood up. "I don't need your help old rat, "he spat out. "Nor do I desire it." With his last statement, he turned and left the room, a very confused and hurt splinter in his wake.

As he began walking up the stairs to his own room, Raphael heard the other three talking about what happened in the dojo. "Do you hear that? They're talking about us again." The darker Raphael stood eyeing his counterpart on the wall. The other Raphael's image was still pinned by his own sais.

"No!" Raphael yelled back. "It's you they're talking about. That wasn't me in there." He tried again to pull at the sais, but with less effort this time. He was slowly giving in.

His darker half slapped him. "YOU STILL DON'T GET IT DO YOU? THERE'S NO ME, NO I, NO YOU!" He pushed a finger into Raphael's chest. "IT'S US, TOGETHER. Our brothers don't care about us, so I'm going to change things for us. HELL," he started to smile when the thought hit him. "We deserve to live somewhere other than these shit filled sewers. WE DESERVE MONEY, POWER, AND RESPECT." His arms stretched out as he spoke each word.

Raphael looked himself in the eye, "I will make you pay for this." He growled low as he spoke.

"THERE YOU GO," the darker Raph cheered. "GET ANGRY, GET MAD, AND THEN………………. WE WILL GET EVEN."

Raphael closed his eyes and focused. He used his feet to try and push against the wall to free himself. "God this hurts," he thought. "I can't let this happen. I can't." He felt something slam into his head, hard. Dazed and confused, he looked up at his alter ego.

Raphael closed his eyes and focused. He used his feet to try and push against the wall to free himself. he thought. He felt something slam into his head, hard. Dazed and confused, he looked up at his alter ego.

"Now see what you made me do?" The armored turtle said innocently. "You made me hurt us." He stepped back with his left hand on his hip, wagging his right finger at the Raphael hanging on the wall. "Now be a good little turtle, and I just might let you enjoy some of what I procure for us. Okay?"

Raphael hung his head. The sound of his voice caught up in maniacal laughter, ringing through his ears.

Later that evening three brothers walked up their Sensei's room. Leonardo lightly tapped on the door.
"Enter," came a voice from the other side.

Leonardo, Donnatello, and Michelangelo walked in and bowed to their father. Splinter nodded and the three turtles kneeled infront of their master and teacher. The room was lit with candles as the smell of lavender filled their senses. Silence hung in the air for a moment or two. One turtle shifted nervously, wanting to say something.

"You wish to speak to me about Raphael," Splinter stated.

"Yes Sensei," Leonardo answered. He continued to speak for his brothers. "We were talking about our training session…..and well……," Leonardo paused for a moment, searching for the right words.

"Sensei, is Raph going crazy?"

"Mikey!" Leo hissed.

"It is alright Leonardo." Splinter held his hand up to quiet his son. "I am equally concerned about your brother. Tell me, what do you think is going on?" Splinter looked at Leonardo, waiting for an answer.
Leonardo turned and looked at Michelangelo, "I don't think I'd say he's crazy, but something is definitely wrong."

"He's finally snapped Leo," Michelangelo interjected again.

Leonardo glared at his youngest brother again. "Mikey, enough. You shouldn't say such things. We don't know what's going on for sure."

"Leo, you didn't see how he looked at me," Michelangelo explained. "I sat down next to him while Sensei was showing you a new stance, and I swear the look he gave me. It was like he hated me. No, worse than hate, like he wanted to kill me. And then Donnie….."

Splinter interrupted Michelangelo before he could go any farther. "Donnatello, you have been very quiet my son." He paused for a moment. "Please, I would like to know what you think of all of this."

Donnatello rubbed his neck, still feeling the tip of Raphael's sais, ready to push through his skin. He cleared his throat.

"Donnatello," Splinter whispered.

Leonardo put his hand on his brother's shoulder while Michelangelo spoke in his ear. "Tell him Donnie. You need to."

Donnatello nodded and looked at his father. "I really think he would have killed me Sensei. I'm….. I'm scared of him. I really don't think any of us are safe around him." Donnatello paused for a moment before giving one last statement. "I don't know what's gotten into Raph, but, I think that if he had the opportunity, he would seriously hurt us or even kill us."

Splinter's stomach turned with that last statement. "As much as I hate to consider it," he sighed heavily, his shoulders sagging, "I believe you are right. Your brother has always been in a constant battle with his inner demons. I am afraid that recent events are causing him to lose that battle."

All three brothers were silent for a long time. Leonardo stared at his sensei, waiting for some great wisdom to be imparted. Donnatello was fidgeting with a string, unraveling from the carpet. Michelangelo had his legs drawn up to his chest with his arms wrapped around them.

"What do we do Sensei?" Leonardo finally asked.

"I wish that I had an answer that would fix everything Leonardo, but I do not. We must be careful around your brother. Do not let him go topside if you can. There is a strong and evil force within him. I feel that the only one who can defeat Raphael's inner demons is Raphael."

Outside the door, an extra set of ears was listening. "You see?" Raphael spoke softly to himself. "They hate and fear us. Just as they always have."

Raphael stared back at his darker half from his position on the wall, his hands hung at his side. He was slowly giving up on trying to fight back. "I know," he whispered back. "What now?"

"HHHMMMMMM, let me think," a well armored Raphael strode back and forth, holding his hands behind his back. "Obviously we are leaving."

"Where?" Raphael asked weakly.

The turtle in control perked up, his eyes widening in excitement. He rubbed his hands together, "I know just the place."

Splinter finished talking with his three sons and stood up. "I am going to talk to your brother. I suggest that the three of you wait outside his room. I do not know how we will react when I take away his weapons and tell him he is restricted to the lair." Leonardo, Donnatello, and Michelangelo all nodded in agreement.

As they climbed the stairs, it seemed to take forever. Donnatello stomach seemed to be twisting up in knots as they got closer. Splinter noticed that Leonardo tensed up and Michelangelo began to fidget nervously. Donnatello hung back a bit. Splinter understood his son's fears. Raphael had always been bigger and stronger. But until now, it was never a trait they feared in their brother. It was one that made them feel safer, a little more confident in battle.

They were standing outside Raphael's room, music blaring. Splinter knocked on the door loudly and paused for a moment. Taking a deep breath, he entered the room. He started to call out to his son over the music but a quick look around the room revealed it wasn't necessary. A red bandanna was pinned to the wall by two sai. Splinter turned around to face the other three. "We are too late," he whispered. "Your brother is gone

If the conversation is too confusing between the two characters, please say so and I'll figure out some way to denote who is talking.