Disclaimer:The following characters belong to J.K rowling.I'm just borrowing them for a while.

Severus opened his eyes and quickly tore open the envelope. As he got Lily's letter out, he took a deep breath and his eyes narrowed down over her words.

Dear Sev,

I know its been a long time since we last spoke. I remember it was during our graduation ceremony and you barely spoke a few words. I was genuinely scared for you back then, knowing what you had chosen to do with your life. I know a certain part of you must have hated me for walking out on you. But it was the only choice I had. I thought I could bring you back to your senses once I left. I guess I presumed I was special enough, which I clearly wasn't, seeing as you chose them over me.

Which is why I was surprised to hear that I had a certain, if not large, part to play in your choice to leave the Death Eaters. Sev, I'm so glad you decided to change your ways. I never totally gave up on you. I said the same to Dumbledore, which I'm sure he must have relayed to you. Now that you have seen how evil and malignant the Death Eaters really are, I hope you can understand why I had to distance myself from you.

A certain part of me believed that you never shared any of their pureblood prejudices but your resentment of Muggles stemmed from your hatred for your father. I hope you have come to terms with your inner principles and seen the error of your ways. Although I never played a major part in your life, especially after I walked out on you, I'm glad to have had at least some influence on you and I hope you don't hold out any resentments towards me in your heart.

On a more happy note. I'm sure you must have heard from Dumbledore, that I gave birth to a baby boy last July! We've named him Harry after James's father. He's the most cutest thing you could ever hope for. He's already blowing up things around the house. Granted, it is a bit difficult having to raise him in such a closed environment. James won't even let me take him for a walk too far. I hope this war will end soon and things will go back to normal.

Dumbledore told me the job you have been assigned. And I have to say I'm not particularly pleased to hear about it. I've heard You-Know-Who is an extremely skilled Legilimens and it must take an exceptional amount of Occlumency to counter it, which I'm sure you are capable of, but I still worry about your safety.

Lets hope Dumbledore finds a means to end all this once and for all, as he's the only one who can. When it does, you can visit us sometime and you can meet Harry as well. You'll surely love him and I'm sure he would be more than happy to meet his future Potions Master. I'll have to wrap this letter up as Dumbledore has just finished talking to James and is about to leave.

Keep faith in yourself as I've seen the good in you and hope you'll see it too.

Looking forward to meeting you Sev.

Lots of love

Lily

Severus finished the letter feeling slightly dazed. Obviously not of a word of it had registered in his mind. He therefore went back and re-read it a couple of times to discern it more properly.

Severus found a huge lump stuck in his throat when he reached the part where Lily complained of not being special enough , and accused him of choosing his friends over her. For a moment he wondered whether he should have declared his feelings to her back then and perhaps it was the lack of candidness that ruined their friendship.

No, said a voice in his head. She stayed away from you because you were evil. You didn't deserve her.

But didn't she say she saw the good in me, he thought to himself. Severus was suddenly finding the letter too cloying. He hadn't yet come to terms with his inner principles, like Lily pointed out. And he certainly hadn't given up his prejudice against his abominable father which as a result extended to all Muggles.

Severus sighed inwardly at Lily's ability to unmask him so easily. Indeed this was why Lily was the only one who could deal with someone as intractable as himself. Severus felt guilty for having brought up such an inconvenience on her, as he read her complain about their closed environment.

I hope this war ends soon. But it's your own son that's destined to be the one to do it Lily, he thought miserably. Trying not to think of it for now, Severus moved on across the letter, skipping over the parts where she mentioned Potter and his son.

And finally his eyes rested on the words that brought him delight beyond anything. Looking forward to meeting you Sev. Waves and waves of happiness swept over him, as he thought of that moment. To finally hear her voice, to see her smile, to see those refulgent green eyes and to see her look at him with pride and not disgust. At that moment, Severus realized, he finally secured himself a thought powerful enough to sustain a patronus for years.

He glanced over at the clock by his table and realized it was time for his meeting with the Dark Lord. As delectable as the letter was, he started worrying of its consequences. Severus was quite adept at Occlumency as the Dark Lord had trained him himself. It was a means to prevent Dumbledore from finding out he was a spy. Severus smiled to himself as he thought of the Dark Lord's arrogance at underestimating his followers. The Dark Lord wouldn't dare suspect that Severus would use it against him, owing to his ostentatious belief that no mortal alive could counter his Legilimency.

But Severus was in real trouble now. He needed to clear his mind of all thoughts. Normally this came quite easy to him as he was used to shutting himself from everyone. But Lily was always the exception. She could easily pervade through every barrier that he built around his mind's fortress. And now he was going to pay for it.

Severus spent the next couple of minutes trying to cleanse his mind and block out all thoughts. After which he pocketed his wand and put on his traveling cloak. He slowly took Lily's letter and placed it inside the drawer of his table and sealed it with his wand. He stepped out of his office and made his way towards the entrance to the castle.

The moonlight was shimmering on hogwarts as he slowly made his way out of it into the chilly night. Halloween was approaching and he could see Hagrid's massive pumpkins bulging out of his garden. The noises of the nocturnal creatures were humming in the background as the moon glistened his pallid face. He stopped as he crossed the magical boundary of the castle, took a moment to calm his nerves and with one deep breath vanished into thin air.

Author:Please,please,please review.I know i sound pathetic but i do want to know what you guys think,even if its a criticism, since this is the first time ive written a story.Thank so much reading.