ZOMG! AN UPDATE!

Guys, I am so sorry that this took me so long. School being horrible to me, and giving me a lot of work. As is my job, so computer time is limited.

Hopefully this chapter will be great, and you'll all forgive me.

"Hey Troy," Chad spat from behind him.

"Yeah?" Troy replied, still deep in thought about the events that had led to Ryan's humilliation.

"I think you might want to read this." Chad handed Troy an orange notebook, of which contained the most personal thoughts of one Ryan Evans. Chad turned, and went back into the school, leaving Troy with the thoughts of his inner devil, and his inner conscience. On one hand, he did not believe that reading Ryan's innermost thoughts would help the situation, but on the other hand, it would help him see into why Ryan was being so standoffish.

'Dearest Journal," read the page that Troy had randomly opened to."I do not know what is going on in my life. I feel... I feel like I just don't fit in anywhere. Wherever I go, people stare. They look at me, and it's as if they know. They just know that I am struggling, they know that I am battling myself. They know it all. But then I realize that I am just being stupid. They couldn't know, for I haven't actually told anyone about my... situation. And like I've said before, I'm not even sure if I am. There is no need to reexplain everything. I have written about it so many times in here before, there is no need to restate the obdvious...,' Troy stopped reading, he flipped back a few pages and began to read again.

'I don't want to feel this way. I want to like someone like Gabby, or Taylor, or Kelsi. Especailly Kelsi. That girl deserves someone who loves her. She deserves to be treated like an angel, but no matter how many times I think that I am going to ask her out, I just can't do it. I feel as if I would be cheating on her if I did that. I would be cheating mentally, for I cannot truely love her in the way that she should be loved. Every kiss would be fake, every touch, every embrace. I just don't know what to do."

Troy closed the journal. He remembered some of those words. He remembered them from when he and Ryan had hung out that night.

Three weeks before the final note had been deposited in Ryan's locker, Troy waited, at 6:59 PM, for his newly found friend to show up. He paced out of nervousness, which he hardly ever felt. He wondered why Ryan made him feel so nervous, for Ryan was just a friend of his, he wasn't anyone to be feared, so why should Troy feel as if his stomach was going to flip around inside of him? It was now 7:00 PM, and Troy knew that Ryan would be there very soon. This heightened Troy's nerves once again. He was going to be hanging out with Ryan, someone who he had never really talked to until the night before. What if they didn't get along? What if Ryan didn't find Troy to be interesting? What if Ryan didn't show up? What if Ryan didn't show up? That thought had not occured to Troy. Would Ryan stand him up? But, he couldn't really stand him up, for this wasn't a da-

"Hey Troy!" Troy turned around to face the boy who was currently causing him so much confusion.

"Hey there, Ryan!" He walked over to the blonde boy. "What do you wanna do tonight?"

"Do you like Chinese Food?"

"Who doesn't?"

"Good," Ryan stated. "I know this great little place on Green Street. We'll go there."

The two walked, making small talk, and reached the resturaunt. The outside looked small, but it was a rather large facility. The floors, walls, and furniture were different shades of red, and pictures of dragons were hung by every booth. Thye were seated, and handed menus.

Once their food had been ordered, the two continued in meaningless conversation. They talked about the Drama Club, basketball, Darbus, Zeke's baking, and anything that popped into their mind that would help them to avoid an awkward silence.

"So, how are you and Gabi doing?" Ryan inquired.

"We broke up about a month ago," Troy replied.

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"No, don't be. I broke it off. We were both getting tired of always having to be around one another. After 11 months, a relationship can get tiring."

"11 months? That's a long time," Ryan thought outloud. "I wish I could have a relationship like that."

"Then why don't you? Have you any girls out recently?"

"No," Ryan said awkwardly, biting his lip before continuing. "If I do date someone, I want to make sure that I can love them in the way that they deserve to be loved. I'm just not sure If I can do that right now." Troy smiled at Ryan's honesty. So this boy's heart wasn't as icy as his sisters, that was a good thing to know.

Troy's phone buzzed in his pocket, and seeing that it was Chad calling, he ignored the call.