Author Note: Will only disclaime this once. Next chapter will be up soon. Hope you enjoy. This is my first NaruXGaara attempt so be kind and please reveiw. Reveiws help inspire me to write.

Disclaimer: Of course I do not own...would I be writing fanfiction if I did? .;; Maybe.

Steadily he ran the blade along the pale skin, slitting his own wrist without a second glance. One fluent movement was all it would take. A single moment to slice his way through skin too pale to scar or show any signs of the abuse. Not that anyone would notice anyways. Even seem to care if he was to show them a concern. Such affections where foreign to his twisted mind…too distant… A thing for everyone else. Not him.

Unknowingly, his fingers uncurled around the heavy blade dropping the object of his affection now forgotten harshly to the floor. Numbing pain shot through him, so in a pleasure way he let it over come him Long ago he had stopped feeling pain in such a way as most. Enough to stop fully reacting to it, but then again he never reacted to anything.

Closing his eyes his thoughts wondered, seeking out its goal in this existence.

Most would see such behaviors of a mad man, or those crying out for help. He would never take his own life. Maybe he was crazy. But he could hardly be blamed for actions they accused. Killing his mother had been a mistake, an accident out of his control as an infant. A child can not control their own birthing can they?

But then…No one wanted to get close to the creature he had become. He was marked, tainted with life taking. Blood on his hand wither he chose it or not. Stains would not come off…he had seen them every day. And thus woke a need of his own. He would never take his own life that would just give too many the things they desired. Oh no, he wouldn't be spiteful like that…blaming them for his woes.

This time, as there always was when his own blood was spilled, there came a reason. The blood, life's liquid warm against his cold bruised skin inspired him in such a way. Comforting him in a way no one else ever could.

Nearly stumbling on heavy legs as he rose the thick liquid ran dripping down his arm to pool along the floor. It would need to stop soon. His mind alerted him more of the fact then his body, as it grew heavier with each step. He had cut too deep this time in all of his haste. He wouldn't be able to delay any longer. This couldn't take too long.

Moving to the white bleached walls of his otherwise haunting bedroom he wasted no time in beginning his work.

An artist at heart, his fingers moving perfectly against the irritating color he had been forced to live with day in an day out, since birth. Like a hospital….what where they trying to make him crazy? If so…it had worked all too well.

His mind ran on overdrive as his heartbeat raced against his heaving chest, memories over took him. He could no longer see what he was doing. Only the flashes of all the lives he took invaded his sight, as his fingers worked skillfully turning life into paint more frantic still. Quick and skillful, leaving a image behind covering all of the four walls in a mural of nightmares.

So his father thought he could get rid of him so easily? Send him away and make everyone forget he had a psycho child at all. It wouldn't be that easy to forget him. No, he would never allow them to forget.

Drawing back to examine his greatest work he wiped his face uncaring the blood he smeared across it in the process. Panting and sweating…the pain tugging now more at his veins then he had felt ever before. The asylum like room now decorated in his own blood, showed the nightmares of his dreams. Now satisfied, he moved back to finish the final touch. "Gaara" He signed his name masterfully in the only somewhat blank amount of space, running his fingers over it as he had finished.

Whispering softly in the emotionless deep voice he would never again be willing to use, "I will continue to exist….always…"