Authors note: You guys amaze me! And make me want to write and keep going faster. Hope this chapter goes along with your expectations. Prove that Dan isn't the worst person ever. He's heart broken as well. Please keep your reviews coming. They are what keeps me going. The song in this one is It's not Over by:Secondhand Serenade

Sprawled across his bed her caramel skin was a soft contrast to his hunter green sheets. Tan shorts and a tie dye shirt two items his dream girl wouldn't even have ever purchased in her life. Her best friend wouldn't have let her ever. Her life, a life he tried so hard not to get sucked into and now that he was out he longed for her more then anything.

He watched Vanessa as she lay asleep in the middle of his bed one hand in her messy tangled curls and the other down at her side. If he closed his eyes tightly enough he could see her outline, messy blonde hair cleared out of her face while her innocent eyes were shut and her mouth curled into it's perfect slight smile. An arm tightly wrapped around Cedric as she always insisted and the other tightly laced with his own. If anything was ever out of place her beautiful big blue eyes opened without hesitation to survey what had disturbed her slumber.

Dan wanted to be with her, he loved her with every inch of himself. As always his words had come out before his brain had had a moment to catch up. He hadn't meant to say it was over but it was out before he could have taken it back. He'd hurt her on two levels, he'd allowed Georgina to seduce him into touching her body while he let her touch his. Then after seeing all the pain from that erupting he'd proceeded to tell her that he no longer wanted her. It was by far the biggest lie that Dan Humphrey had ever told.

"Why did you let me fall asleep? I thought we were gonna do something?"

Vanessa's voice interrupted his thoughts as he felt a pillow square it's self with the side of his head. She'd been trying to get him to lighten up and forget about his traumas. Though so far no luck had come from her endeavors, nor was he sure any would.

"V, you're going to make my head ache come back again."

He voiced dejectedly as he raised a hand to his temple and shook his head as though it was back already.

"That's because you were up all night drinking black coffee after coffee and writing tortured love poems. Really Dan, a normal guy would be over her by now."

The true cynic spoke as she bounced herself off of his bed and over to the desk of which was cluttered with papers and pens. Picking up one of his note books she waved it around to prove her point. It seemed like everything Dan had written was about death, dying and heartbreak.

"I love her V, I don't know why I let her go."

He confessed beside himself as he got up from his bed and walked to the other side of the room opposite her. As he picked up a picture frame with a photo of himself and Serena he sighed. Both of their smiles were real. So real they seemed to glow off of the paper. That same smile hadn't been cross his face since.

"Dan come on, you've seen her world. She'd probably already forgotten about you. Sleeping with a new guy already. You told me about her past. Just get over her already. I can't take the mopy lovesick boy you're becoming. It's strange and completely not you."

Vanessa sighed as she looked at the guy formerly known as her best friend. He'd changed so much in just the past few weeks and Vanessa couldn't stand it. All she wanted was her best friend back. She couldn't understand why he was so crushed by a girl that had lied to him over and over again. Vanessa knew that Dan was no perfect guy but he hadn't deserved to be kept in the dark as all of her friends watched in and laughed.

Vanessa's break with Nate had been for nearly the same reason. She hated his life, how he always had everything handed to him on a silver platter. In her eyes Serena was exactly the same type of person. She used the people around her like it was a game. Dan had only been a stepping stone in her sick games.

"You don't understand and I wouldn't expect you to V. but maybe you're right. Maybe we do need to get out there and experience some of summer before it's completely gone."

It's been two months and he still felt like his heart had just been ripped out at his own expense. Maybe if he got out for a little while he could improve it a little. Or maybe he could sneak a peak at Serena and see her beautiful smile. Know that at least she was ok.

Gossip Girl hadn't been much of a reliable source lately, it seemed as though all of the Upper East Side crowd had magically disappeared. He just hoped that no matter where she was she was at least doing a little bit better then he was. Sure it might have killed his ego a little to see a bright smile on her face but just to know she wasn't dying without him would make him better.

"Out of the Van der Woodsen land, she's not worth your pain. Come on Dan, I miss my best friend."

Vanessa's words pleased with him as she walked closer to the door and held the door open waiting for him to pass threw.

My tears run down like razorblades and no, I'm not the one to blame: it's you or is it me?
And all the words we never say come out and now we are all ashamed. And there is no sense
In playing games, when you done all you can do.

But now it's over, it's over. Why is it over? We had the chance to make it. Now it's over,
It's over. It can't be over. I wish that I could take it back, but it's over.

I lose myself in all these fights; I lose my sense of wrong and right. I cry, I cry. I'm
Shaking from the pain that's in my head. I just want to crawl into my bed and throw away
The life that I led. But I won't let it die. But I won't let it die.

"And the Humphrey finally decides after months of exile he's going to feel the sun's warm rays on his oh so pale face."

The sarcastic film maker mocked as she cast the camera into his face with her own loving smirk as they existed the loft. Right away she could see the torture written all over his face. He was like a poor pathetic puppy dog that had lost his owner. She couldn't help but hate Serena Van der Woodsen for captivating his heart and making him think he knew what love was. Take the boy's virginity and turn him into a hopeless loser.

"Vanessa, are you sure we can't just stay in and play scrabble with Jenny again? I'm sure she'll be home soon."

Dan said as he looked around the ever moving street. Even the cabs that raced by seemed to have lost there thrill, inspiration and color. Nothing had ever looked more bland to him.

"Do you want me to go back in and get you your teddy bear."

She mocked him as she pulled him to the subway sign. One of the ever lovely perk of living in the city, transportation at every corner.

"Shut up Vanessa, can you just tell me where the hell were going? I'd like to be back so Jen isn't coming into an empty house. you know how much she's trusted after her last semester of school."

He tried to make up a quick excuse to go home early not wanting to endure the torture of being in the city, having to look at all of the places they'd be together at. The places she'd held his hand, leaned over to kiss his cheek, and told him she loved him.

'I love you' three little letters he'd said prematurely to one girl, and meant so much to another. He'd let it all crash and burn. He really was a dumb ass.

"Earth to Dan, will you stop zoning off on my. It's getting annoying."

Vanessa had shut off her shut off her camera and was sitting in a seat on the crowded, overloaded subway. You had to love the busy, musty smells of public transit.

Serena was probably sitting in Europe somewhere drinking Bellini's and laughing at all the males around her passed her their numbers. He could see her in all of her flawless, perfect glory looking angelic as she innocently took in her surroundings with her navy eyes.

Everywhere he turned it seemed like there was some reminder of what he'd let go. The night after the wedding he'd taken a nearly two hour shower letting the water go from scorching hot to freezing cold as he screamed, cried and scrubbed off the remins from the previous day and that said day. Emotions Dan had never thought he'd feel so strongly. Things he wouldn't and couldn't ever admit he'd done.

"where are we going exactly?"

he complained in distaste as he got off of the subway threw the numbers of annoying people prodding and poking at everyone else.

As her hands clamped over his eyes he couldn't help but wish they were Serena's hands. He could have pulled them down, twisted around and kissed her, taking her back in surprise. But it was Vanessa, just Vanessa.

His afternoon had slightly improved his mood. A day at an old rustic movie theater seeing gory but lame horror movies with his best friend, it was like old times in a way. But when the blonde in the back caught his eye for a moment he thought it was the only person that owned his heart. But the girl's smile wasn't half as much as beautiful as Serena's. His Serena's.

He watched the girl and the guy cuddle in the back of the theater and couldn't help but feel his need for Serena even more. How much he missed her was scary.

But it's over, it's over. Why is it over? We had the chance to make it. Now it's over,
It's over. It can't be over. I wish that I could take it back.

I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart. Don't say this wont last forever. You're breaking
My, you're breaking my heart. Don't tell that we will never be together. We could be over
And over, we could be forever.

"Come on, I think we should head home."

Vanessa said after the long day at the movies they were walking the solemn Upper East Side streets with pretzels. Dan's mood still hadn't changed and it'd been all day long.

"Sounds good to me, Cab or…"

As he turned the corner he hadn't noticed where they were still his eyes fell upon the black limo in front of the Palace Hotel. His heart pounded as much as his head started to as he saw the long slender blond's hair and limbs. Her arms tightly around Nate's neck as he held Serena's body tightly to him as he kissed the top of her head and whispered something in her ear. Dan couldn't tell if she was smiling or not but all he could see was the way Nate whispered to her and kissed her head like she was a delicate package he couldn't let go of.

Dan's mind knew that he should have scene it happening, they'd been together once. He should have known that he was just a piece in her game.

With that he turned around, his back to the sight. His arms snaking there way around Vanessa's waist as she looked at him in a slight surprise but didn't question it. She liked the feel of his arms around her. It was something she'd been after in the very beginning.

For Dan, he needed to feel something besides the sudden pain that was threatening to make him break again. Maybe Vanessa could cure him of his pain even if it was only for a brief time.

I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart. Don't say this wont last forever. You're breaking
My, you're breaking my heart. Don't tell that we will never be together. We could be over
And over, we could be forever.

It's not over. It's not over, it's never over, unless you let it take you, it's not over,
It's not over, it's not over, unless you it break you. It's not over.