Chapter 4- "Z Fighter No More?"

Yamcha's P.O.V.

"Come on, Yamcha! They need us now! Aren't you going?" replied Tien, he was serious.

I sighed. Bills, bills, and more bills. I can't even pay them off because I've been out of work so long and I still can't work because I'm still injured with my leg. Bulma and I aren't together anymore, we were over a long time ago which was two months ago and it pushed me into depression. I was barely moving on.

Why did this happen to me? Everything was going just fine until I got into this accident, I wasn't mad at the guy who did it. He visited me a lot in the hospital and he felt so bad for the damage he caused. It was his fault but I forgave him and he moved on, I couldn't stay mad at a person so long and it was good that he had some regret for what he did.

Tien rushed to me as I watched the outside, "Man, you aren't yourself…..You haven't been out for a couple weeks."

I sighed sadly, "……Do I look like I want to go out? I'm too depressed…."

Tien looked at my condo, the place was a mess, "Look at this place, there is no way you can care for yourself you need help."

I got up angrily as I fell to the floor as the whole table shook. I left my food on the stove and I struggled to keep up with it. It just burned along with my toast. Damn it, I have to do it again for the fifth time in a row!. I hate being in cast and I hate being injured!!!

Tien frowned, "Man…..everything's just falling apart with you….Now I feel even worse about the accident."

"Tien!!! I said we CAN forget about it, you're lucky to have minor bruising than any injuries at all!!!"

Tien stopped and thought for awhile, "……"You're right, I-I mean I was there and I didn't do anything…I'm still guilty…."

I pounded my fist and sighed angrily, "Just go Tien, you're depressing me! I want you to stop blaming yourself!"

Krillin and Goku stopped over as I struggled to get up and greet them, they even noticed it was hard for me to care for myself. Maybe I needed someone to look out for me. I almost fell on the floor as I tried to balance, Tien rushed over.

Goku rushed to me and had flowers in his hands. I half-smiled, it was great he brought some I needed something to look at especially if it's colorful. They were trying to get me smile as my frown took over. This was going to be the hardest ordeal I had to get over and I was moving in small steps.

"Yamcha is going back to fighting when this over, right?" asked Goku, I knew I wouldn't be going back.

"He's got to rest those muscles first….." Krillin added, "He's still in a cast."

Silence filled the room as I rest my head on the table and I didn't reply. Everyone's expression changed as I looked up and gave the look that I wasn't coming back.

Tien cleared his throat, "….Um, he doesn't want to come back. Yamcha and I talked this out several times and he wants to stop for right now…"

Goku stopped stiff, "Why Yamcha?"

"…..Things are too tough, I possess the fighting spirit but look at me….It'll take months for me to recover from this…"

I put me head back on the table and remained still. I was dead and everyone knew I possessed no life. I reached for my pills as I popped one by one, I was up to about four when Tien smacked the bottle as the pills scattered across the floors.

I didn't bother to scramble for them as I just sighed and pressed my head to the table again, I would do this for two hours sometimes. God, I was really suffering.

"When did you start doing this?!?!" replied Tien, I had a problem and I knew it, "Yamcha! This is bad…."

"Look, I can't stop……" I froze, I was afraid I was going to overdose sooner since the number of pills kept going up. "I'm not addicted, I just can't deal with all this…"

"….Maybe you need some time on vacation…." suggested Goku, "It'll do you good…"

I began to laugh, he was kidding right? That sounded great but I can't, I have to wait until these damn injuries heal.

I struggled to walk the dishes to the sink as they fell out of my hands and shattered. I fell to the floor and cried, this was just hell and I had it everyday. I needed someone to be with right now and I needed a vacation. I was beginning to slowly lose it that I seemed dead and out of my body.

"I HATE THIS!!! I'm fighting with life everyday I wake up!" I replied, as I smacked more dishes across the table. "I'm fucking messed up!"

Everyone stared blankly as I growled in frustration, everyone looked at me as I got up to go lay in my bed. Goku stepped back ad Tien sat down, the silence took over and I rolled over on my side. This was going to be hard for everyone especially Goku cause he didn't want to lose me. I couldn't train and it would take so long for me to catch up.

Tien walked into the room, "……I'm sorry Yamcha. I just keep doing it because I was there with you and I felt like I could've prevented it."

"I know, I didn't mean to snap like that but it's hard to keep my emotions in control." I sighed, I really needed something, I didn't know what it was but I needed it.

"You could always go to a psychologist or something….maybe it'll work…"

"Nah, I don't need a therapist….I think I need to deal with this some other way."

"Listen if you're so worried about the training, I could always help you…."

I shook my head, "No thank you, I like going at my own pace….Thanks anyway, Tien…"

Tien grinned as we left the room, I was going to miss them but I needed to get away and clear my mind for awhile. Most of all I would be searching for another woman after my injuries healed. There seemed to be a special one in my dreams, she was beautiful and fine. One combo I liked together.

She was only a dream but I had a feeling that she was somewhere in the world and I would find her someday. I was thinking about her some more when all of sudden vivid images of wolves and all these weird images started happening to me, I thought I was hallucinating but it seemed so real.

'Nah, when do see any wolves around here…' I thought, 'God, I must've taken too many pills…'

The images began happening again as I stopped what I was doing and called to Pu'ar. She came running in as I began eating more pills so I could sleep, she was worried about me and she had every right because I was slowly becoming addicted to the pills.

"Yamcha! You just had four, stop overdoing it!" She replied, "I don't want an accident to happen!"

"Pu'ar it's no use, I've just had it with life..." I replied, "Life hasn't been doing nice things to me since this accident...I thought Bulma and I would last longer than this."

Pu'ar growled, "Well, if you ask me...She walked out on you and now look at you, you look horrible..."

"Depression isn't a fun game, Pu'ar..."

"You only have four months to go for the cast to come off and you can start fighting again!" Pu'ar began clapping and jumping around, "Wait, you're still fighting right?"

I sighed, "I don't know...If I can't keep up then I'm out, it'll take forever for me to reach 200,000 again...I'm at 1,950 right now because I was injured..."

"You're going to need some serious training to get back up there, I can see why this isn't going to be an easy road for you..."

"I don't know Pu'ar, I feel like I'm dead...I haven't been myself for awhile..."

Pu'ar frowned and left me by myself, she knew things were getting worse the longer I was in bad condition and the four months were going to be hell. She tried her best to comfort me but it didn't always work, I still felt bad and for the first time weak in my entire life. I just wanted it all to end, it was getting too hard to deal with anymore.

I fell back in bed and I began to get a headache, 'This is fucking torture, I really can't take this anymore, I really can't.'

Pu'ar came running back in with my burnt toast and waffles as I screamed, sixth time in row. I couldn't believe this, it's like I forgot what I was doing and I didn't know how to do it anymore. I smacked the plate out of Pu'ar's paws as she began to get scared, I looked scary every time I threw a fit or if I was angry.

"M-Master, you're scaring me..." she cried, "W-Why are you like...this?"

"Pu'ar!!! How the hell could I burn something so easy for the sixth time in a row?!?! Damn it all! Goddamn it!!!"

Pu'ar dropped the plates as they all shattered, "...Yamcha...You really need help...You have issues to work out..."

"Damn it!!! Stop reminding me!" I yelled, "I know I have issues!!! Just say it Pu'ar, I've failed at everything since the accident!"

"Oh, master..." Pu'ar voice became softer and sadder, "You're always so angry, I don't know anymore..."

I calmed down as I fell back and bed and screamed again in frustration. I looked at Pu'ar who had tears in her eyes and she hung her head down knowing that there wasn't much she could do for me but to let things work out, I felt so bad that I took it out on her sometimes and that I didn't want to go anywhere anymore. I was slowly dying.

Pu'ar turned back and sighed, "...If you need me, I'll be cleaning the mess up in the kitchen..."

I ran my fingers through my hair and I began to cry again. Why was I doing this to myself and to Pu'ar? She was so happy to have me home and now she's not enjoying my company. I looked at the liquor in my cabinet and I began to drink it, It had been awhile since I touched a drink but I needed it and it would help me feel better. It made me feel worse.

'God, I'm so messed up...I don't even know which way to go anymore...' I thought, 'All I do is complain, yell, cry, and avoid everyone...'

There was no direction, I wasn't in one. All I knew I was so downhill that getting back up the hill would take too much out of me to even bother, what ever happened to how things went for me 12 years ago? Everything just changed and I couldn't keep up with it anymore.

I took another glass of liquor and I drank it all in one time, I wasn't being very smart about drinking but I was full now and I wouldn't need anymore to relax and I would be asleep soon anyway. Change needed to happen but screw it, I was too far off for change until the four months were over.

I looked at myself in the mirror, where was the girls of my dreams? Only she could save me from all this pain and disaster but she walked out. I would need another one to come to my rescue and save me, I didn't want to be lonely and without someone I was empty and full of no hope.

That's the end of Part I, Please R&R.