sorry about the wait guys, I had all kinds of crazy stuff happen to me and didn't get a chance to update. Here's another sulking Edward chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own it!!

Warning: mature themes, SUICIDE

EmPOV

'Time waits for no man', it was a common human saying, and apparently it applied to vampires too.

Time passed, and though we never really got over our favorite little human's death, we did move on, well most of us anyway. We had moved to a new school in England, and everyone except Edward was attending. In fact, Edward wasn't even seen out of the house, in the 5 months we had been there no one but us even knew he was in England with us. We had told everyone else that he was in a boarding school back home.

I stared at his closed door as I walked down the hall on my way to school. Rosalie had kept trying to push him into going back to school, but Alice and I knew better than that. We knew what that would do to him, and though he didn't even bat an eye when she started on him these days, we always stood up for him. He may have acted like he didn't care, but I know that he couldn't handle going back to school so soon.

"EMMETT!" my lovely wife screamed from down the stairs, "WE HAVE TO LEAVE NOW!!"

I flew past her and got into the driver's side door of my jeep, the Volvo sat unused in the corner of the new garage, it had a tarp pulled over it. That was one of the things that Edward never did anymore, drive. I shook my head, and pulled out of the garage speeding down the long driveway and heading to school.

"guys I've been thinking…" Rosalie trailed off

"Really?" I asked laughing, "that's news."

"Oh shut up Emmett, seriously, I think Edward should come back to school, I mean it's been almost 9 months since she died, and he hasn't done anything. He doesn't even listen to music anymore or play the piano, he just sits around all day. Even if it's just a distraction, I think he should come back to school."

She had a point I decided, and I could see that Alice thought so too. "Well maybe, we should talk to him about it first, and I think Emmett should be the one to do it." She said.

"Wait, why me, I don't have a death wish." I asked indignantly.



"Oh Em, he's not going to kill you, he barely moves these days. You are the one who got him out of his room when we first moved here, so you would probably have the best luck at convincing him."

"I don't think he will put up much of a fight Rose," I explained to her, "he doesn't have the will to fight about anything anymore, he just doesn't care."

"Well I still think you should do it," Alice insisted, as we pulled into the school parking lot.

"Alright I'll talk to him about it, but I'm not making any promises, I'm not gonna force him to do anything if he's not ready for it." I said decisively, I was going to do what was best for my little brother.

School passed as usual, and we came home to a silent house. I opened the door to the family room, and a familiar bronze head could be seen on the couch. If I hadn't known better I would have sworn he had fallen asleep.

"I wish Emmett, I wish" he muttered at my thought.

The others didn't bother to look confused, they were used to him answering or commenting on unspoken things.

"So listen, we think it would be best if you came to school with us tomorrow. Just so that you're doing something besides sitting around all day." I looked around for support, only to see that they had left me alone. Some siblings I have… loyalty, pah, fat chance of that.

"If you think it is best, but I cannot promise anything to you." He answered me, staring off into space.

"What does that mean?"

"I do not know if I can last all day, but I will try I guess."

"You have to get back to the norm sometime, and we think sooner would be better than later."

"I did not really plan on getting back to the norm, actually," he said so quietly I may not have heard him.

"What, were you planning on sitting on a couch for eternity?"

"Emmett," he turned to look at me, and black eyes met gold. "I'm not planning on being around for eternity." He said seriously.

"What do you mean, I thought we got over this!" I was scared of this, he had expressed the fact that he wanted to die before now. Before Bella even, when he was first changed he had asked Carlisle how you could kill a vampire, in hopes to kill himself, and when he had his rebellion he had expressed similar tendencies. We all knew that he had been suicidal a few months ago when Alice got her vision, but we… at least I had thought that had passed.



"Got over this, what are you talking about?" he sighed, tiredly. "Listen Emmett, I do not know how long I will be around for, everything is painful now. Everything reminds me of what I had, of what I lost. I do not know how much longer I can take the pain, every time I am reminded of her, it is like I lost her all over again." He looked into my face again, and I could see a single pearly-white tear trailing down his face, "it is nothing personal Emmett, I just do not want to live anymore."

I was shocked to say the least, but I kept it hidden from my younger brother. "Listen Edward, I don't know what you are going through, and I'm glad of that." He nodded, understanding, "But, I don't want to see you dead, none of us do."

"I know that. If you were wondering why I am not dead yet, that would be it. I do not want to do that to any of you, especially not Esme, but I can not take it much longer."

"Just hang in there… for us?"

"I will try Emmett, I will try."

I left him, and went to talk to the rest of my family.

"Well, he said he would try to stay the full day, but that he wasn't making any promises yet. How old do you think he should be?" I asked

"He will refuse to take off the wedding ring, so we will have to make him a senior. That's the only thing that would be believable if he was married." Alice announced after a short vision.

"Can't we try to talk him into taking it off?" Rosalie asked.

"No, he will point blank refuse. We really have nothing on him to blackmail or threaten him with, so I don't think that will work."

"What if we took it from him?"

Alice's eyes clouded over briefly, before wincing and shaking her head, "Firstly he will see our intentions, and not let it happen, and secondly, if we so much as touch either of the two wedding rings, it ends with an arm being ripped off, and him running away, and if he runs he may not come back. I think it's best if we leave him alone, you can ask on your way to school if you want, but he will say no." Alice decided.

"Oh, well that will have to do I guess," Rose sighed, "I'll call the school and let them know that he is back from the boarding school, and needs to become a senior at our school."

The rest of the night passed with us getting ready to send Edward to school the next day, Esme and Carlisle both agreed that it was time for him to get back to a more normal life. I didn't mention anything else of our conversation to anyone except Carlisle. He took it as I thought he would he wasn't surprised at all, though I knew that he was as scared of this as I was. He understood his son's reasons, and said he didn't blame him in the slightest.



Morning came quickly, and soon it was time for us to leave for school. Edward got in the back of the jeep silently, and I saw Jasper give him a pitying look before climbing in after him. I could only imagine how hard it was for him to suffer along with Edward, though he insisted that it wasn't bad unless he concentrated on his brother's emotions.

The car ride was quiet, I tried to break the never ending silence and lighten the dark mood, but nothing worked, so I remained quiet for the rest of the ride. We got Edward's schedule at the front desk, and were relieved to see that he had class with at least one of us at all times, like we had requested over the phone.

Jasper, Edward, and I headed off to math class, while the girls went to gym. We got in and introduced Edward to the teacher, I pulled her aside and said, "My brother recently lost his young wife, school is really a distraction for him, so if he doesn't pay attention, please don't be too hard on him. We just want to get his mind off of things."

"Oh, my. Of course I won't be hard on him, poor thing."

"Thank you." I said relieved.

The rest of the day went by in much the same manner, Edward would stare off into space during class, but the teacher would not call on him. I told Alice to say the same things to the teachers before classes, and lunch came quickly.

We got our food props, except Edward. He didn't even try to act like everything was okay, and we didn't expect him to.

"After lunch Edward and I have Bio." Alice announced.

"Bio, you signed me up for biology!?" Edward croaked, his voice cracking.

Alice looked confused, then a look of comprehension and horror filled her face. "Oh My God, I'm sorry Edward, but that was the only Senior Science open." She looked sheepishly at him.

"I am leaving, there is no way I am going there!" he stood and began to walk out.

"Wait, she called. Edward you have to stop mourning sometime."

He sighed, and said "Emmett, did you tell them anything?"

"Umm… Carlisle." I offered.

"Urrgh," he groaned, "Alice, I'm not planning on being around for much longer." He said quietly, but seriously.

"what are you talking about?" she asked, sounding scared of the answer.

"I do not know how much longer I will be around, living hurts too much Alice." He said quietly.



"You're going to kill yourself!" she asked shocked.

"Not right now, but I do not know how much longer I can go on like this. Everything reminds me of her, and everything hurts."

"How could you do this to us Edward, we are your family!"

"Alice, it is nothing against you guys, but I can not live like this for eternity. I have to go." His voice was strained and there was another tear forming in the corner of his eye. With that he turned and left the cafeteria earning a few questioning glances from students.

"How could he do this?" Alice was still near hysterics.

"Alice, honey, you need to look at it from his point of view. What if you lost me, what would you do." Alice's face turned horrified.

"I don't know," she answered.

"He just lost his reason to live, you remember what he was like before Bella. He stuck around for us, because he cared for us, and wanted to protect us. He loved us, but didn't really look to us as family, merely as people he cared for and needed to protect. He would disappear for days without notice, and was never really open to any of us. He always said that he was a monster, and didn't deserve happiness, and now that he has had Bella, he knows that he deserved happiness after all."

"Well that's a good thing."

"Yes, but the fact that she died right before he was going to change her just helped to convince him that he didn't deserve her, because she was taken from him before he could make her his for eternity. And now he knows what happiness is, and knows that it is gone for good. He doesn't feel the need to stick around waiting for something he knows is gone when it causes him so much pain." Jasper sighed, "I can feel his emotions, but I only get an inkling of what he is feeling unless I concentrate on it, kind of like how he can concentrate on someone's mind to really hear the words, otherwise it's just a buzzing noise. I have felt the full of what he is feeling before, and if it were me feeling that constantly, I would have done it already. I have been expecting this for 9 months now, and honestly I think it's coming sooner than we would like."

"I'm scared guys, I don't want to loose my brother." Alice whimpered.

"No one wants to loose him Alice, but we can't torture him by making him stay." I said, "We need to try to convince him to hang in there for as long as we can, but we also need to give him support, and show him that we understand."

"We're all scared Al." Jasper said, pulling her into a hug, "but he needs to make his own decisions."



A/N: hope you liked it, once again sorry for the wait, the next chapter will be a Bella chapter again, I am hoping to reunite them in a few chapters, and the story wont be much longer.