What if Edward listened to Bella's songs? What would they be? What would he do about it?
More than ever, I wish I could fall asleep… without the chance of ever waking up again. School was even more tedious than ever, if that was even possible.
I needed her.
But my very existence endangers her. I can't go back.
After last month, finally showing some emotion, my family has been wary of my every move. And they should be, after what I was about to do.
I really was a sick masochist.
It made me curious that she created her own CD. So I got my own –off the net, of course.
The moment the mail came, I tore my way to the door and got all the packages. I retrieved mine and dumped the rest of them onto the table. Away from my family's questioning eyes, I escaped to my bedroom.
I plugged in some earphones –not wanting the rest to hear –and hit play.
"How did we get here? I used to know you so well. How did we get here? I think I know."
"Got a look in your eye, looks a lot like goodbye."
"I wonder, how am I supposed to feel when you're not here? 'Cause I burned every bridge I ever built when you were here."
"Your face it haunts, my once pleasant dreams. Your voice, it chase away all the sanity in me."
"And if I bleed, I'll bleed, knowing you don't care. And if I sleep just to dream of you, I'll wake without you there. Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me?"
Her voice was beautiful, but there was something very off. Her songs were usually beautiful. These were forced. And even more disturbing, they were about…
Me.
I didn't bother to listen to the other half of the songs. I knew what to expect; something I didn't want to hear. I got the CD from the stereo and broke it into half. I smashed it into my trashcan and it broke into a million shards.
I lay down on the floor and curled up into a ball.
I really am a sick masochist. If a dead heart could break in half, mine would right now. The shattering was a thousand times more painful than my transformation.
I needed her.
Songs: "Decode" by Paramore, "Lie" by David Cook, "That's What You Get" by Paramore, "My Immortal" by Evanescence, "Missing" by Evanescence. Thanks to all of them!