Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life
Can't get no love without sacrifice
If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell
-Happy Ending, Mika

Bella POV:

The weeks following the day of the funeral have been painful, empty, and dull. Painful because I have lost my best friend, and every day I would look at the where she would sit during lunch, and my eyes would immediately liquefy. Empty because there was a hole inside my heart; Jasper left – and I did not have the guts to call him and ask where he was. It was also empty because I did not have Edward. He was such a gentleman about the whole situation, of course, and he has been giving me space. He did not drive me to school anymore, come to my room, and he only did it for me. I was sure it was difficult for him to stay away, and I appreciated how thoughtful he was; but it was still painful. And it was dull because my life was so normal and boring. I tried to blend in and occasionally talk to Jessica, Mike, or Angela. Edward would still sit with me during lunch, and we would talk from time to time.

"Guess what," Jessica started the conversation, as usual, with a chirpy tone to her voice. "I am going to Florida during the summer! Isn't that so awesome?" She then looked at Mike to see if he would be excited for her. No one answered, so I decided to speak for a change.

"That's great, Jessica." I forced a smile. "I hope you have fun."

"Thanks," she replied. She was obviously disappointed that Mike did not show enthusiasm.

"Jessica." I heard a brilliant voice from the right; it was so melodic and beautiful. "Enjoy." It surprised me that Edward spoke; he would usually only speak with me.

"T-Thank you." Jessica stared at him, amazed. She was probably just as surprised as I was.

After lunch, Jessica came by my side and whispered. "Are you and Cullen and item? Or did you break up?" She must have seen what has been going on.

"Um… We are sort of taking a break." I shrugged.

"Oh, I'm sorry. But… Would you mind if I, well, asked Edward out?"

I could not believe that she would think of such a thing. But I wasn't sure if Edward would agree… He loves me, right? But then again, it would be absolutely fair if he did choose to get over me and move on. It would actually help me.

"Go ahead." I sighed.

"Thanks, Bella. You're the best!" She hugged me. "See you after class!"

"Bye." I rolled my eyes and stepped into history.

The day ended, and I found Edward in the hallway.

"I need to ask you something."

"Go ahead." He said.

"In private." I added, desperation in my voice.

"Alright, Bella." He chuckled and we sat inside his car. I immediately felt at home with that familiar smell of his silver Volvo.

"Did Jessica ask you out?" I couldn't believe I was this shallow. I never cared about gossip.

"What if she did?" Edward smiled.

"Well… You wouldn't consider it, would you?"

"Why not? We are not exactly together, Bella."

"But you can't!" emotions ran through me, vividly splashing in my mind, but not in a good way.

"Why not?" He challenged by repeating what he said. "Don't you love Jasper?" he asked again.

"But Jessica?! Edward, you used to tell me she was superficial."

He quietly growled. "How dare you keep me away from someone when you fell in love with my brother? Bella, do you really believe that it is easy to read his filthy thoughts and have to live with him?"

"You are right." I frowned. "I'm sorry, Edward." I gripped on his arm. "I didn't mean for things to be like this."

"I am sorry, my Bella. What I said was a little exaggerated. But you also have to allow me to make my own choices." He smiled.

"Yeah, I know. I love you." I kissed his cheek.

"Me too, love." His velvet voice flowed in my ears like soft, beautiful music.

He was hurt. He was trying to hide it by saying he 'exaggerated', but I have heard enough. There was nothing I could do but feel horrible. I felt horrible, but I also knew that he might date Jessica. I am rarely jealous, but now the lonliness was taking over me. The emptiness grew to a point where it was too deep to extend.

I took my cellphone out, and nervously looked for a number I haven't called in weeks.

"Hello? Where are you? I really need to talk to you."

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