Chapter 10

Stevie stared back into the defiant eyes of her daughter Rose. She tried to burn the image of her face into her mind. It had been so long. She saw much of herself, he stubborn headstrong ways, inside the eyes of Rose.

Stevie felt as bad as the first day she had given Rose to Michelle all those years ago, having to stand there and tell Rose to leave. It was killing her but it had to be done. It was for Rose's safety.

Stevie had fallen in love with her all over again, seeing the confident and happy young girl arrive at Drovers. Pride swelled inside her for this beautiful girl, and she told herself it had been the right thing leaving the child with Michelle.

Rose had been so nervous, introducing herself, saying "You probably don't know who I am, I'm your niece." Stevie wanted to hug her and assure her that she had not forgotten her, not for a second. It cut her deeply to hear Rose say "Your niece." She wanted to hold her and tell her 'you're my daughter, I love you, I never stopped loving you and thinking about you, I want us to be together.' But she knew she could not.

She had tried to convince the girl to go back home. The information Stevie had gathered was that Rose had a fight with Michelle over a new boyfriend, and had run away. Rose was so thrilled to be here, she fell in love with Drovers straight away, and told Stevie that even though they had not had contact for over ten years, Rose still felt some sort of connection. It brought tears to Stevie's eyes to know that somewhere deep down Rose had always thought of her too.

Rose dug her heels in, begging to be allowed to stay just for the holidays. Stevie almost relented. But in her mind she kept thinking about the danger to Rose if he ever found out...

In the end it was hard to get Rose to consider leaving, Stevie had to resort to cruelly telling the girl she didn't want a stupid kid hanging round messing up her life. That's all it had taken. She saw the rage burning in her daughters eyes at being spoken to like that. She waited for yelling, screaming, something to be thrown across the room. But the angry look in her eyes turned quickly to despair, and Rose slowly turned to walk away mumbling "Sorry to have bothered you."

~~

Dave and Tess had been listening in to much of the conversation. Ordinarily Dave would have told Tess to mind her own business, but this time he too was curious. Neither of them could understand why Stevie had said those things or foced Rose to leave. They entered the room, Tess giving Stevie a look of confusion and frustration. Tess followed behind Rose "Wait Rose, I'm sure we could work something out, you've come a long way, at least stay the night."

"No, thats not a good idea." Stevie said, fighting back tears. "Rose needs to go home tonight, i'll call Michelle."

Tess was bewildered. Stevie handed Rose money for the bus ride home, and asked Tess to drop her off in town on the way to get the supplies.

"Fine whatever" Rose agreed "I dont wanna stay at this dump anyway. Everything my mum said about you was right."

Rose slammed the car door as she got in, and Tess followed quickly, not sure it was the right thing, but sensing the girl would hitch hike if she didn't take her and put her on the bus.

Once the car was out of site, Dave turned to Stevie and asked her 'What the hell was that all about?"

"You wouldn't understand." She said harshly and moved to turn away from him.

He could see the hard set of her jaw, the way she was narrowing her eyes and fisting her hands. To him it looked as if every muscle of her body was taunt and just about ready to snap.

He didn't get it. He really didn't. He'd been so sure she'd be delighted to see her daughter. In his mind, he replayed every conversation they'd ever had about Rose and in front of his inner eye Stevie always looked the same: Proud of the girl she'd brought into the world, deeply guilty about giving her up, hopeful that maybe someday they'd be together inspite of everthing and longing for that reunion. Always longing, longing for her little girl. Longing to get her back. And he just could't get that picture of Stevie to fit to what he'd just witnessed.

He couldn't explain to himself why it suddenly felt so important to understand her and her motives. He just knew that he had to know, had to know what had made her react like this. What it was, that had made her send her daughter away, telling her she'd never wanted her here. Which he knew to be a lie.

She didn't talk about Rose often, but every time she did he could see in her eyes just how much she wished for her girl to be there.

He grabbed her arm and turned her around, forcing her to face him. Immediately she twisted out of his grasp and then, she just stood there, looking up at him defiantly, as if daring him to question her behaviour. He hesitated for a moment, unsure of what to say and knowing that one wrong word was gonna make the whole conversation blow up in his face. In the end he settled for simple, because everything was complicated enough as it was.

"Try me."

She just snorted and turned around once more, heading for the stables. He looked at her retreating back and almost missed her parting words.

"What's the point, Dave? You'd probably only think I made it all up because I couldn't stand for you and Tess to be happy."