Hey ya'll,

(Disclaimer : So pretty much I own nothing.)

Sorry it took so long for the update been busy with school. It's my senior year and I've been keeping pretty busy.

Read & Review

Ch. 4 Dead Inside

Setting: Chicago Illinois, Sept. 14 1918

I woke up and groaned. My entire body was stiff, my head was throbbing, and my eyes felt stung and sore as I opened them to the harsh light. I must have fallen asleep because the light entering my room from the window was a blaze of the morning sun. I pushed myself up off the uninviting hardwood floor and looked around.

How did I end up asleep on the floor? My bed was perfectly made up, so I must not have fallen out of it. I looked down at myself and I realized that was still in the clothes I wore to the party.

The party. Then it dawned on me, the place where my heart should be felt hallow like it had never been there begin with.

"Ouch," I mumbled, putting my hand to my chest and looking down like I was making sure it was still there.

I stumbled over to my desk stretching the stiffness that remained away. I pulled out some paper and my best writing pen from the old, third generation, ash desk, that my father had handed down to me.

I took my seat in front of the sturdy desk. Tapping my pen that I held loosely in my right hand on the blank paper. My left elbow was rested on the opposite side of the paper. My other hand held my head up allowing my gaze to fall into the blank nothingness of the page.

I didn't even know what I wanted to write. Who was I going to write to? To her?

I hate how I have to keep from thinking her name but the emptiness where my heart belonged felt tight. Stop it I thought. Just write.

Bella,

The pain I'm feeing causes me much grief. I feel foolish for allowing myself to open my heart to such vulnerability. And what hurts the most isn't the fact that every breath I take causes the emptiness my chest to ache, but the fact that I hurt you as much as I hurt myself, if not more.

Bella, please understand the feelings I have for you are not simple. They are probably the most complex emotion I've felt in my entire life.

I love you Bella, and I'm sorry you do not return my love as I wish you would, but please accept my apology for my rash actions at your party, for I sorely regret them now.

-Edward

I read my letter over and over, contemplating weather or not I should give it to her. Every time I read her name the agony I felt made me regret it.

I ripped the letter in half. Pushing myself away from my desk in frustration, I got up to lay face down on my bed. What am I going to do now?

Realyshort chapter I know. I'll try hard toupdate soon.

Next chapter is from Bella's POV and takes place after their walk in the park. Reviews would rock.

-qtmelnee

(P.S. also note that I'm intentionally skipping around... that's whyeach chapter isdated! :-D )