Final Melody

Chapter 4

Conflict

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Lavi stared out the window. The moon was waning, its light weak, barely illuminating his room. A lantern was at his desk; it's soft glow spilling over the disarray of open books. He was sitting on his bed, head against the wall. His right bracelet was off, rolling between his hands.

He hadn't been able to summon the Innocence since the morning. Every time he had attempted it, the pain in his chest would return, making it impossible to concentrating on anything but the pressure crushing him.

Sighing, he rubbed his face with his hands, the scars unfamiliar and foreign against his cheeks. The world sat heavy on his shoulders. New responsibility of the Bookman with the added demands of being the second crystal-wielding exorcist in Black Order history. Maybe he was just tired and his Innocence was unwilling to push him any further.

Allen's unconscious body still fighting the Level Three, pushed only by the Clown Crown flashed though his mind, reminding him that Innocence was more unpredictable than a caged animal. Sedate and calm one day; wild and violent the next.

He growled. Whatever was wrong with him, he hoped it would go away soon and he could get on with everything else in his life.

"I don't get what you're so worried about." A bored voice remarked.

"Go away Deak." He looked up from his hands to the thin figure lurking near his bookshelves.

Spindly fingers crept along the volumes stopped at a leather bound one who's cover was decorated with intertwining knots of gold. He pulled it down and turned to Lavi, smiling. "You don't have to get angry at me. When I was in charge, you were the happiest, Those long night spend in the north, completely alone. Nothing to do but read and enjoy the vodka."

He flipped to a page, scanning it idly. "And now you're stuck here," he continued, "Nothing to do but wallow in your own thoughts. Do you know how boring you are to listen to? You never shut up about how they're not really your friends, how they're just brush marks, how you'll never live a normal life because you're the Bookman? It's awful."

"Will you just SHUT UP!?" Lavi yelled, temper peaking as he lunged for his other self.

His hands closed around Deak's neck. The cold laugh shivered under his fingers, building from low chuckles to violent peals of mirth. They echoed around them, mocking him from every angle, making his fingers tighten around the intangible neck. "You're going to kill me?" He choked out, tears glistening in his eye. "That's a good one. You tried that once. Remember this?"

Lavi looked down to see the dagger protruding from his chest. Deak's hand pushed it in further. Blood dripped from his lips as his hands fell from the throat to clutch the hilt. The 48th laughed again, clapping Lavi on the arm and walking away from him. "Say 'hello' to the Bookman when you see him."

"Lavi?" Light sliced into the room, broken by a small silhouette. "What are you doing? Are you alright?" Lenalee stepped into his room.

He looked to his stomach. The knife was gone. No sweet smell of blood hung in the air and his lips were no longer soaked in his blood. "Lenalee, I was just…" he trailed off, still in shock.

Lenalee bent over, picking up the book with the gold designs and weighing it in her hand. "You survived." She said finally, nodding in the direction of his wrists.

"Yeah, it all worked out in the end." He said, giving her a goofy grin in an attempt at his old self. When Lenalee did not return the smile, he grabbed the book out of her hands and placed it back in the shelf.

"You can stop pretending." A hand moved up his back, coming to rest on his shoulder. He turned to look down into the dark eyes, "You can talk to me. I understand."

"No, you don't." He shook out of her hand, striding away from her. The pressure was building in his head, making it throb. What he would do to only get some dreamless sleep. The nightmares that plagued him since the Bookman's death had prevented him from getting proper rest. "You could never understand Lenalee."

A hand found his shoulder. "Why do you do this to yourself Lavi? Why do you insist on closing yourself off from us? From me?" She hesitated, "Is it because you think we couldn't understand?"

He still didn't look at her. "Of course not. I just-"

"Just think we don't have the same depth as you? I've spent my whole life in pain. From the moment I was chosen by my Innocence I've lived in fear that one day I wouldn't see my brother again!" Her hand was digging into his shoulder and her voice was trembling, "Is that nothing like you? Can that not even compare?! Tell me Lavi! I just can't understand why I couldn't understand what you are feeling at the moment?"

Finally, he turned around. The pale hand fell from his shoulder to come across her face, wiping away the tears streaming down her face. He reached out, but she looked up and slapped his hand away. A pause, then she fled from the room.

"Wait!" Lavi made to follow her, but her voice made him stop dead.

"I don't want to talk to you!" She yelled at him, fleeing down a corridor.

It took the exorcist a moment to realize he wasn't breathing. Sagging against the wall, he sighed, rubbing the back of his head. He was such an idiot.

"I heard the argument." Lavi whipped around to Allen peaking out behind a corner.

Lavi turned away from him and placed a hand on the wall, steadying himself. The throbbing in his head was crippling. He wanted to lie down and for the world to shut up and leave him alone.

"She's just angry because you could've gotten hurt." Allen continued.

"Is she?" Allen didn't have time to speak as Lavi turned on his heel and marched off.

Lavi stared at the coffin, it was the first time he had seen it since the funeral. He hadn't figured out what he was going to do with it yet. His hand reached out and glided along his own dark reflection.

"What am I going to do?" He wiped hand face on the back of his hand. "You picked a horrible time to die…old man… I'm not ready to be the Bookman yet. I'm not ready… I still want to live my life." He knew no one was listening, but pleading out loud allowed him to feel a taste of freedom, even if only for a moment.

"Lavi…" He didn't turn around. He knew Allen's voice anywhere.

"Why did you follow me?"

The footsteps drew closer. His instincts already high-strung, Lavi tensed, his hand clenching by his side. Allen's presence made him feel uncomfortable at the best and worst of times. "I was worried about you." He let the comment hang in the air, waiting for the redhead to answer.

When Lavi didn't speak, Allen cleared his throat and said, awkwardly, "It's not your fault. You couldn't have predicted an Akuma attack…"

He was cut off as Lavi rounded on him, green eye blazing. His chest was heaving and his breathing was harsh.

"Yes. Yes, I could have." He pushed by the white-haired exorcist. Allen barely caught the whispered words. "If I had just listened to the old man he would still be here."

Allen watched Lavi's retreatin form and sighed, sinking to the ground and holding his head in his hands.

Sunlight crept over the skyline it's brilliant rays illuminating the Black Order headquarters. A figure moved through the hallways, his shoulders slumped with tiredness. In his hand was clutched a report. Reever yawned, stretching as he walked by another window filled with sunshine. An all-nighter had drained most of his energy but he knew his day wasn't anywhere near done yet. Maybe before Komui's day begun he could get a few minutes' rest in. He chuckled bitterly and rubbed his eye, yeah right.

Reaching the end of the hallways, Reever carefully pushed the door to the Head Office open. Inside, the lights were dimmed and the Head was sleeping on his desk, snoring lightly. He cleared his throat, but Komui didn't wake. For a moment, he considered waiting to wake his superior and crashing on the red couch. The report's contents flashed in his mind and he sighed, cursing himself for being such a good assistant.

"Chief Komui." He called and to his surprise, the figure on the desk sat up, blinking bloodshot eyes up at his assistant.

"What is it, Reever?" He asked blearily, rubbing his face.

"Hevlaska did that scan of the Bookman you wanted." The Australian placed the report onto the messy desk.

Komui pushed his glasses up his nose, eyes scanning the document. "Yes. Did you obtain his Innocence?"

Reever ran a hand through his hair, scratching angrily. "That's the problem. It's gone."

The dark eyes flicked up from the words to stare beadily at Reever. "Gone? What do you mean?"

He shrugged his shoulders, shaking his head. "I can't put it in simpler terms. It's just, not there. We found his compass with nothing in it."

"Where is it then?"

Author's Note

Kinda cliff hanger ending. Never really tried it before.