God this is depressing to write. Seriously, when I thought up the storyline, I cried. I NEVER CRY, ever. What the hell?! This fic was inspired by the song Courage by Superchic(k). And Stand in the Rain, by Superchic(k) (again, lol) Here are the pairings in here:
Sakura and OC (Hideo) and a little Sakura and Sasuke, onesided.
Ino and Chouji.
Tenten and Neji.
Itachi and OC (Shiro)
Sasuke and Karin... not. Lol, I got you there, sucker.
Slight Kiba and Hinata. Yes, I like KibaHina. Shoot me.
Hana and Deidara (which is Complete Crack (With a capital C! :p). But I think it's cute. Here.)
This is random, and I know I could be updating my chapter fics, but screw the world I have money. Kind of.
.:Plummet and Rise:.
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~I never got to tell you I cared, you ass.~
I know when I started, diary.
It was that day he dumped me.
'Sakura, I don't like you anymore. I'm going out with Karin now.' He said.
Why, diary? Why did he do that?
I thought about that a lot. And I found out why.
I just so ugly. It's no wonder. I'm so fat, my forehead is too big, and my hair is so annoyingly bright.
That whole day, I cried. And cried. But, now, I am doing something about it.
Today, everything was almost normal. I forgot my lunch. I sat down with Ino and Tenten and Hinata. Shion and Karin were over with Naruto and him. I can't look at them. Well, maybe Shion and Naruto. Hinata was crushed when they started going out. Now, I think she's over it. We told her over and over that he was just too dense to see her.
Now she started hanging out with Kiba. He comes and sits with us everyday.
Now was when he arrived. He strolled up casually and plopped down to Hinata.
' Hey guys! Do you mind if he sits with us?' He jabbed the new kid in the arm to punctuate his question. The other kid glared at him playfully.
'I've known him for, like, ever.' We all smiled at the new guy obediently. Normally.
My smile felt weird. Like those neighborhood toddlers plastered it on with their school glue and tape.
Fake.
Looking at each of us in turn, he finally caught me eyes. I looked away first.
His red gaze was too much for my watery green one. Did he know?
'Hey. I'm Hideo. Nice you meet you guys…' Hideo was a common name. Just like mine.
I'm a nondescript person, really. Awkward, fat, and nerdy. Oh, and my clothes are vastly out- shined by Karin. Ino, too. But Ino isn't his girlfriend. Karin is. I'm not, either. Karin is.
Karin is everything else I'm not.
'Hey Sak, where's your lunch? You haven't had one for a week…' Ino said, frowning at my empty space on the cafeteria table. I looked up with my dull green eyes and smiled my fake smile.
'Oh, it's fine. I forgot it again… I've been really weird lately…' I replied. Ino nodded, and then offered me half of her sandwich. I refused on the excuse that she needed to eat more than I did.
Which is so true. Ino is a beautiful blonde with slim curves and a good head on her pale shoulders. Her boyfriend, Chouji, is so very lucky. In fact, he used to be an outcast until he met Ino. She ended up with a huge crush on the large, kindhearted boy.
Hideo noticed that I sneaked a hungry look at Tenten's lunch. I looked over and immediately regretted it.
He looked like him, a bit. Spiky black hair that hid the left side of his tanned face, crimson eyes bright. He had a big, long scar over his visible eye.
He and Kiba started arguing and I wished they would stop. They sounded so much like him and Naruto. The playful banter that I used to laugh and try to stop.
At the end of school, I always wait on the roof for my mom to come for me. So there I was, wind blowing my too-short, annoyingly pink hair around. Mom was usually late.
So I was stuck here with all the smokers and couples.
Then he and Karin came up. When they started to kiss and whisper things, I turned around to face the balcony. The school was tall, and I contemplated if it would kill me if I jumped.
'Hey, look. It's Sakura. How's it going, Sakura? Get a boyfriend yet? Oh, wait… you can't…' the female voice behind me sang out. I whipped around to see Karin. She smirked at the pained expression on my face.
I want to slap her so bad.
I guessed that Itachi came to pick him up.
'Oi, leave her alone, you ugly bitch.' A new voice came, sleek and dark from behind the redhead. I sucked in a breath.
Karin? Ugly? … well, she is a bitch, but, ugly? Never.
She turned around to, looking like someone had slapped her in the face. Speechless, she muffled a nasty curse and stalked off.
It was Hideo. He blew a raspberry at her as she walked away, childishly. When he turned back to me, he had a exaggerated disgusted look on his face.
'What did she do, cut the uniform even shorter?!' he muttered, referring to her very, very short skirt. I snorted in laughter.
Probably, I replied. He wrinkled his nose and walked over to the edge. I turned around too, and as soon as I looked at the long drop, I again wondered if I could…
'Don't look over the edge like that. I know what you must be thinking. Life's not that bad.' He interrupted my thoughts, and I choked on my spit. I sat down, legs dangling off under the railing. He looked down at me.
'Sakura, right?'
I just nodded.
We didn't say anything else. That was that. I decided that he was cool. But I wondered why anyone would try and be my friend. The others were probably in it for pity.
I stood up abruptly. I don't need their pity. All I had to do was eat as little as possible. It would be easy. I'd be beautiful, and he would ask me out again. I looked around to see my mom coming towards me. I ran up, and stifled my heavy breathing from the short run. She smiled and we walked through the school to the parking lot.
As we drove away, I saw Hideo walking to a car with a beautiful girl about Itachi's age. Her hair was long and she had her bangs tamed on the left side with a black barrette. The other side was hanging freely, reaching only to the bottom of her stunning aqua eyes.
It was a soft, pastel blue. Unlike my loud pink. I guessed that she must be a relative. She was too old to be his girlfriend and she was ruffling his already- messy hair playfully as the walked.
It's been a whole school year now. It's the same thing every day, after school he'd show up and we'd talk about things. He never mentioned the edge again.
I kept my grades up.
I got thin again, diary.
Ino and the others said so.
'Sak, you're so slim! What did you do?' Hinata had exclaimed when we went shopping. Tenten nodded, and Ino hugged my thin frame. All three waiting for my answer.
I ate right, I replied. Isn't it great?
Then I noticed their solemn faces. I looked at them, bewildered. Ino looked away while Hinata and Tenten told me that I needed to eat more.
I'm confused. Why? Why would I be fat again after losing so much weight? I glanced at Ino, who was the only one who didn't seem too concerned.
'Hey, guys. What's up?' It was Kiba and Hideo. Tenten turned to the two, frowning. I grabbed her arm and told her I was fine, really. She shook her head and, despite my protests, continued.
'Guys, is it just us or is Sak getting really thin?' She asked hurriedly, brown eyes wide. Kiba frowned, and Hideo was turned sideways away from us. I saw him watching out of the corner of his eye.
Kiba looked me over and nodded. 'Yeah,' he said, 'She is thin. Are you okay, Sakura?'
I smiled my fake smile and nodded vigorously. He looked a bit bewildered. Hideo growled under his breath.
'Damn it, don't lie Sakura. We can see through you.' He said, crimson eye narrowed. The white scar glistened. Tenten met my shaky green gaze with her bold brown one. Hinata nodded. Ino was still looking away.
'You too.'
She whipped around to look at Hideo, blue eyes wide.
'W-what?'
'Your reaction gives you away, Ino.'
A new voice came from behind the two boys, 'Indeed.'
It was the pretty blue- haired girl, Shiro. She was Hideo's older half- sister. They were apparently really close. She was in college for Psychology.
Wait… psychology? Like, therapy… and stuff.
No, therapy was for crazies. I am not crazy.
'I'm sorryto intrude on you two girls, but I couldn't help but notice…'
She continued, looking us gently in the eye, 'You both seem to have certain… symptoms. Come with me?' She asked. We nodded dumbly. She led us off with Hideo following.
She took us to a rather secluded place out back of the mall. Curious workers snuck glances at us.
Finally, she turned to us. Hideo leaned against a little tree nearby.
'Iam qualified to be a therapist. As I said earlier, I don't want to intrude… but, I just noticed some… things. Sakura, you never seem to eat… and, Ino, you escape to the bathroom after eating anything… You'll hurt yourselves if you don't stop. Please, if you want to talk to someone, both myself, Itachi, and Hideo are here. Itachi and I are professionals, and Hideo seems to be a bit of a natural. It's your choice.'
Ino and I were silent. But, but I was so close to breaking down there, diary.
I was surprised when she hugged us. Both at once. Ino choked, and I knew she lost.
'I… I don't know why. Don't blame me; I'm not crazy! I am fine…' she rasped out.
'We never said you were, Ino, Sakura. Do we look crazy?' Hideo asked. I twisted to look at him. He crossed his arms across his chest.
What? I said, the word falling from my lips involuntarily. Was he implying…?
He glanced at his sister, who nodded and let us go.
'You think that therapy is for crazy people, huh? Well, I won't tell you it's not. Maybe we are crazy.' He laughed bitterly, 'Right, sis?'
She smiled a gentle smile, 'Yeah. But it helps us crazies, doesn't it?'
'Yeah. Well, ever notice?' Shiro pulled a pillbox from her purse, and her pointed to the thick wristbands on his wrists.
We gaped. No, I said. What… what do you mean?
She continued for him, 'We have had our own share of problems…
Don't label it, don't label it, please please don't label yourself or me…!
'I was a suicidal schizophrenic. I fell in love with the sky and tried to jump off a skyscraper. Itachi noticed and got me off in time. We've known each other for a while. That was years ago… In fact, he left his family with Sasuke because their father was abusive. That's why.' She looked pointedly at me. Why he is… is…
A player.
Hideo picked up after his sister, 'Me? Well, I used to be a cutter… and I have depression. If sis hadn't found me I'd be dead.'
Shiro now focused her clear gaze on us, 'I can tell you straight- up what is happening to you girls.'
We looked away, afraid to hear the answer we knew.
'Anorexia and bulimia. We got medicated, but you girls have to just use the best medicine there is… willpower. Can you do that, for yourselves?'
Tears slipped down my pale cheeks. It smeared my make-up. I had started to put more on after… after… he…
No. Sasuke, dumped me. Now, I am angry. The tears speed up.
We were startled by Shiro's cell phone ring. She flipped it open and frowned at the screen sadly.
'Yes? Yes, he's with me. Here.' She handed the phone to her brother, who kept a blank look on his face.
'Yeah? Mmm'kay … What? Yeah, I feel fine. No. No. Oh. Okay. I'm… fine. Ok, here she is.' He said, keeping all emotions from his voice and face. But I noticed. When he handed the phone to Shiro, his arm twitched. Or shook. I couldn't tell. She took it back.
'What is that?' Ino asked. Hideo flinched visibly.
'Nothing, it's fine.' He replied and stalked away. Shiro cut her conversation off and shouted after him. He stopped but didn't turn around. Ino and I decided silently not to follow. We just looked at each others' tearstained face.
It's been a long time. Years. I went through college for a Ph. D. I'm a doctor, just like my Aunt Tsunade. She's an expert, known around the world. She says I'm a natural.
I got back to a healthy weight. It's amazing, really. It did take a while.
I've gone out with a couple of guys. I never really feel strongly that way for them. I let them go gently, saving as much of them as possible.
Shiro and Itachi got married. It was so predictable, and I told them so. They laughed, and when their children, Takeo and Makura were born I was named godmother. I wondered why Deidara was named godfather instead of Hideo. He shrugged when I asked him. Hana, Shiro's best girl friend, is married to Deidara, who is Itachi's college roommate and friend.
Hideo fades in and out. But…
He came crashing through the secure roof of my world when I got that phone call from a hysterical Shiro. She was completely unintelligible, until Itachi snatched the phone from her and informed me to come to the hospital.
As I drove there, I nearly went crazy trying to figure out what could be wrong. I sped up. What if it was one of the kids?
Well, it wasn't. It was him. Hideo.
I got there and ran up the room. She was standing there, by the side of the bed. A slow beeping noise greeted me. I passed two nurses as I walked in.
'Too far gone…' was all I caught.
Too far gone…?
The first thing I noticed was that the left side of his face was visible. The raven- black hair had slid off his face. He was pale.
That wasn't right.
Let me tell you something, old diary. Hideo is one of my best friends, along with Ino and Naruto. But unlike Naruto, he's not like a brother to me.
The machines beep, unyielding. I hate those things now. My doctor's mind noticed that the heart monitor was slower than good. I finally managed to make my feet move over next to Shiro.
Hideo? I whispered. The brilliant crimson eyes opened slightly.
'Hey Sakura… don't look so sad.'
How can I not?! I said painfully. The words scratched against the lump that was growing in my throat.
'Don't be sad. I haven't been sad for a long time. I knew, Sak. It's no use to be scared.'
You… knew?
'Yeah. 'Member the day sis told you and Ino that you had eating disorders?'
I nodded, not trusting my vocal chords.
'I found out that day. Hey, I'm 29. I'm old enough.'
You ass, I said, no one is old enough. Never. Stupid tear ducts, I added to myself silently afterwards.
'I guess you could think that. But at least I got to do what I wanted, Sakura. Well, most of it, at least.'
You can't leave! My voice rose above common courtesy in a hospital. I didn't care.
'I can and I will, Sakura' His voice has never been that quiet. Or weak. He wasn't weak.
But… but why didn't you tell me?!
'Why do you think, Sakura?' Then he coughed, and I just knew that blood was starting to well up in his mouth. I was right. The red started to flow out of the corners of his mouth.
I don't know. You're crazy.
'Heh. Maybe we all are.'
The tears flowed freefall. I grabbed his hand. The wristbands were gone, and I saw the crisscrossed scars on his wrist.
'Sis… what will you tell them?' Shiro looked despondent. Takeo and Makura…
'The truth.' She choked out.
That's why. He's not their godfather because what's the purpose when he won't live?
'I don't think I'll see you guys again. There is no heaven or hell, I think. Just an end. Don't try and follow the end; it's bad for you…'
Then, he lapsed into unconsciousness. The nurses and doctors ushered us out. I walked out dumbly. The scuffling of the nurses who were attempting to move Shiro came from behind me.
Takeo and Makura stood with their father outside. Shiro walked over and Itachi took her into his arms. I stood in front of the two boys, Takeo eight and Makura three.
They stared up at me, with blue and red eyes. My eye lingered on the youngest, Makura. He looked just like his uncle and had the same kind of stare.
I hugged them. Tight.
What else could I do?
We put a black marble maker underneath this big, old tree up on hill on Shiro and Itachi's big property.
At the service, Shiro and I told each other this was where we wanted to be put.
In actuality, he was cremated. Shiro let him go on the cliff overlooking the grey, cold sea. The gravestone had his name on the top instead of the front.
I didn't cry. In fact, I don't think I ever did after that.
Sasuke asked my out again.
'Sakura, I was wrong before. I'm… so sorry.'
I smiled at him, a real smile. Sasuke, I said carefully, I can't.
'Why not, Sakura?'
Because I love someone else. But I did love you, a long time ago. Please don't hate me, I pleaded. He understood. He never did get married.
He didn't know that you were dead, of course. You idiot.
I loved you.
But you left me, too. You're just as bad.
Sakura Haruno died at age 34, single, in a tragic shooting while walking to a gravesite at a close friend's property.
The cheerful, outgoing and beautiful woman lived a very successful life as a world- renowned doctor who worked hard to find cures for rare, fatal diseases. She was the proud godmother of Takeo and Makura Uchiha.
The whole world will miss her dearly for her bravery and effort.
She was buried on the hill she was walking to by her own earlier request under the old cherry blossom tree.
Shiro and Itachi Uchiha named their first daughter after her. The green-eyed, raven-haired little girl was born just minutes after the shooting.
:( Now I'm depressed. Review and make the crazy writer happy again... she may update the Umbrella Girl then...
