A/N: Wow, I don't even remember writing this story.

"Maid of honor! You're a fucking pussy."

I looked over at Adam and tried my hardest to glare at him, but the knowing smile on his face just made me stare at the wall. "I hate you."

"Stop being a little bitch." He slapped my wrist. "Grow some balls so we can play hockey."

I leaned on the stick, sighing. "I have to go with her tomorrow."

"Where?"

"Shopping. For her dress. And the bridesmaids' dresses."

Adam stopped flipping the puck and just leaned against his bent knees. "Are you kidding me?"

I threw my stick. "Oh, fuck, I'm such a girl for saying yes to her."

"Why did you?"

I looked down at him, trying to tell him with my eyes, but Adam wasn't exactly three-dimensional like that.

He blinked awkwardly. "Why are you staring at me like that?"

"Because I think I'm in love."

He sneered a little. "With who?"

"I—Not you!" I flapped my hands. "Jesus, you're obtuse."

His eyes snapped slightly. "Steph? You're in love with Steph?"

"Shhh! Don't say it too loud!"

"Say what too loud?"

I looked over at Jay, who had just come through the sliding glass doors with a case of Molson under his arm. "Nothing."

"No, you have to tell me."

"I don't have to do anything, Reso."

"Canadian Code of Honor."

"Speaking of honor," Adam started, grinning up at me. "Why don't you tell Jay what your latest occupation is?"

"It's not going to beat the Sea World Trainer."

"Oh, it is." Adam nodded at Jay. "By a long shot."

"Really?" Jay's face lit up as he looked at me. "What is it? Astronaut?"

I shook my head.

"Jazz Club singer."

"No."

He grimaced slightly. "Prostitute?"

"No!" I glared at him. "What goes on in your head? Honestly."

"Come on, man, don't change the subject. What is it?"

I sighed impatiently, jumping with Adam nudged my leg with his elbow. "Stephanie asked me to be her maid of honor. And I—"

Jay exploded with obnoxious laughter, folding in on himself to keep the beer safe as he fell to his knees. "No! No! Please tell me it isn't true!"

"It's true!" Adam squealed, falling back to laugh heartily.

"You're a bunch of fucking assholes."

Jay frowned up at me, tears in his eyes. "Oh, God. I'm sorry. That's just... that's just sad. Even for you."

"Thanks." I bent down and ripped open the case. "I hope you know I'll be drinking all of these."

"How did she badger you into that one?" Jay asked.

I shook my head as I drank.

"He's in love with her!" Adam yelled.

I spat directly at his face, wiping my mouth. "You fucking dick!"

"You're in love with Steph?"

I snapped my head back at Jay. "Don't fucking judge me, Reso!"

"I'm not judging you! She's hot." Jay snorted. "I just need to say one more thing and then I'll never speak about it again."

My grip tightened. "What?"

"Make sure your dress isn't purple. It makes you look hippy."

"Oh, Chris, I'm so glad you agreed to doing this."

If she wasn't so beautiful, I would've Codebreakered her face. But if I had, she'd end up looking like Paul, and then I wouldn't love her anymore.

Okay, I lied. I just wouldn't want to fuck her.

"Yeah. Me too."

"You're going to love who I chose. They're probably my closest friends."

I nodded, sitting down on the couch in the little bridal shop we were in. Everything was white. Was white the fucking wedding color, or something?

That was a joke. I make jokes.

I'm Chris Jericho, remember? Laugh, minions.

"Oh, here they are!" She grabbed my hands. "Be nice, okay? I don't know if they know you."

"Anything for you, Steph."

She wanted me to be nice? I can be nice.

But when the door opened, I knew I couldn't be.

Because I already knew her bridesmaids.

The blonde one stopped dead in her tracks, causing the other two to bump into her back.

Because I already slept with all of them.

Steph smiled at them warmly. "Oh, guys! Isn't this exciting?"

Blondie sneered at me. "What's he doing here?"

"Oh!" Steph wound her arm around mine. "Chris is standing up for the wedding, too."

"Shouldn't he be with Paul then?"

"No, no. For... For me."

Blondie scoffed. "You're joking, right?"

Steph shook her head. "No, I'm completely serious. Chris is my maid of honor."

I smiled as best as I could. "It's nice to... see you all. Again."

The dark-haired one put her hands on her hips. "Do you even remember my name, jerk off?"

I nodded. "Oh, yeah. I remember you."

"Uh huh. And my name?"

"You... you..." I winked at her, pointing my finger like a gun. "Gail Kim."

She pursed her lips. "Try again."

"Lena Yada."

"Once more."

"Melina."

Her eyes sizzled. "Lucky guess."

The redhead pushed her way to the front. "You have one guess, Jericho."

As if luck would have it, something snapped in my brain. "Natalya. I know you."

She smiled slightly. "You remember me?"

"No one can forget a mug like that."

Her mouth dropped and her fists clenched.

I held up my hands. "No, no, I meant... your face! You have a very beautiful face!"

"And what about me?" Blondie cocked a brow.

I blinked at her, mouth tight, but then I smiled, opening my arms. "Jillian."

And then this bitch full on just punched me in the chest! It was unbelievable! If I hadn't gotten the wind knocked out of me, I would've shaken her hand.

"Beth," I hissed, holding my ribs. "How could I forget you?"

"Yeah, yeah." She went past me, pushing my face away, and hugged Steph. "Oh, Steph, I'm so happy for you! Paul is such a great guy."

"He really is," Melina gushed.

"I know, right?" Steph sighed dreamily. "He's absolutely perfect."

"Does he treat you right?" Natalya asked.

"Like a queen."

I scoffed. She wanted to be treated like a queen?

Wait until she got with the King of the World.

A/N: Haha, I enjoy writing this. Review.