Stage 6: Working Through, Reconstruction and Reliving History.
So we had been living here for almost a year by this point. We were doing well in our jobs, our house was decorated exactly how we wanted and life was pretty much perfect. We were getting on brilliantly and we loved the weather and just life in this country. It was brilliant. I had nearly done my seven stages. These ones are ones where life gets better though so I don't really notice when I go to the next stage.
Soon things took a bit of a turn though, not necessarily a bad turn, but it did create a bit of a hiccup. I started noticing that I felt as if I was putting weight on so I weighed myself and it turned out I had put on 2lbs, which didn't seem to much so I wasn't really that bothered so I just carried on, then I started being sick, I couldn't help it. I wasn't ill it was just every now and then I would be sick. Carlise said I should go to the doctor but I said I was fine, and that I would get over it soon; but it wasn't until on of my work colleagues said I could be pregnant. Then I thought that is why I was being sick all the time! That is why I have put on some weight, not a lot I will say that but still!
In my brake I drove as fast as I could to the nearest superstore and bought 3 pregnancy tests, best of three right?
When I got to work I went to the loo and did one. I waited 3 minutes and I was reading the result. Positive. Oh my god I was pregnant, no that must be wrong, I will do another one. So I waited an hour and I went and did another one. Waited three minutes. Positive. There was no point in doing another one, I had already got the best of 3 in two go's.
How was I going to tell Carlise? I couldn't I was so scared. What if what happened before happened this time. What if it wasn't meant to be this time either?? When I was driving home I decided that I wasn't going to tell him now, I would tell him a bit later, once I had been to the doctors.
I got home and straight away Carlise knew something was wrong but I was not going to back down. I wasn't going to tell him. So I just went straight upstairs and into the spare bedroom. I stayed there all that night. The next day he tried to talk to me again, but all I could think about was the baby, and because I was so stressed about telling him I just freaked out and went to work almost an hour early.
Things gradually got worse and worse; I knew what was happening, I was reliving history, I was isolating myself, sleeping in the spare room, and before I knew it we started to argue. It only went on for a few days but it seemed like forever. Carlise would get up in the morning go straight in the shower through to the kitchen have breakfast shout bye as he was going out the door and go. It was exactly like it was with Emmett. We had started off like me and Emmett aswell, trying to spend every waking moment together, doing everything for each other. Eventually once again living together became unbearable. We needed to sort things out, especially as I was beginning to show, but I managed o hide it for a little bit longer by wearing baggy tops and trousers.
I eventually plucked up the courage to go and ask him if we can sort things out. He luckily agreed. He said we could go out for a meal, but I said no as I thought that it would be too much like how me and Emmett were and I definitely don't want to go through that again. So we decided we would go shopping.
The next weekend we got ready and we went into the city centre. We walked past all these baby shops and I had the perfect idea of how to tell him. We went for a coffee and we talked things over and sorted them, after an hour or so of shopping we were walking back to the car and I saw that the last shop before the car park was a baby shop.
"Do you mind if we just go in the last shop along here before we go?" I asked knowing that he wouldn't realise it was a baby shop. When we got there he said.
"Why do you want to go in here Rosalie it's a baby shop?" I didn't answer all I did was look down and stretched my top over my little bump.
"Rose you're not. Are you?" he asked with a confused look on his face. Again I didn't say anything all I did was smile, and he knew the answer. He gave me the biggest hug I have ever known him to give me, and a smile I have never seen him do before. He was delighted but I was scared; scared that things would turn out how they did before. I told him so aswell. He reassured me that they wouldn't that they wouldn't be the same that we wouldn't have the same problems that he wouldn't put me through the same things that Emmett had, that we would be together forever.
When I was close to my due date was when I was most scared, this is when my waters broke and everything last time, but when I went past that point still pregnant was when the worry started to ease a little. Soon all this anxiety would be over and I would have a baby.
We decided that we wanted to know what sex the baby was, so when we went for our 20 week scan we found out that we was having a baby boy. We spent days trying to think of a name, looking in books on websites anything, but we couldn't find one that really struck us. Then we found it, we was looking through a book that my mother had sent over from England, of baby boys names. We was looking through it when we saw Edward, we thought it was perfect. I don't know what it was but we just fell in love with that specific name.