"You sure that you're allowed to come with us, Hokage-sama?"

Naruto pouted, crossing his arms firmly over his new robes. "Y'know, technically I could have you thrown off a cliff or something for questioning me, Shikamaru."

Sasuke exhaled loudly, shaking his head as he followed behind his Kage. "Can we not turn this outing into another circus? I've had more than enough of your ridiculous 'orders'."

"Hey HEY! What ridiculous orders?!"

"Naruto, really? You wouldn't call the-" Sasuke took a moment to open a small scroll he had been carrying in his kunai-case. "- 70 cups of instant ramen you had delivered to your quarters this morning ridiculous?"

"I call them necessary, Sasuke."

"And the 3 meetings you called before lunch?!"

"Also necessary. Weren't you listening?"

Sasuke wasn't looking at the scroll, anymore. "....and the.......things you had me do during those meetings?"

Chouji almost choked on his sake.

"Why do you think I called the meetings in the first place?"

Sasuke immediately motioned for the bartender to send him a drink - anything would be fine, so long as it would get him good and drunk. Fast.

---

Shikamaru, Kiba, Chouji, and Neji had all found refuge from the chaos at the far end of the bar, where Chouji was already three drinks from gone.

"And then I was all, HEY! YOU! Who are you.....are you gonna finish that, Shika?"

Shikamaru shook his head, not an answer - more like frustration, and slid the half empty bottle toward his team mate. "How am I going to explain this to your father, Chouji?"

"Easy." He took a long drink from the bottle of moonshine, wiping his mouth dry with the back of his hand."

"Yeah Shika - just be too drunk to explain." Kiba laughed, taking the bottle from Chouji with a smile. "That's how I get outta' shit."

"Why does that not surprise me, Inuzuka?"

"Because, Nej - you're a Hyuuga. Hyuuga are stuck up, and think they know everything about everybody."

Kiba wasn't going to be able to smile his way out of that one. Neji just about snatched the bottle from away, taking a loooong swig for himself.

Nobody else spoke.

"No Kiba, what you fail to grasp is that we DO know everything about everyone. It's what makes us superior."

Chouji laughed, Kiba sneered, and Shika kept to shaking his head. "Y'know, sometimes I wonder what would happen if we stuck Neji and Sasuke in a room together."

Neji didn't seem to hear him, but Kiba was practically on his back laughing. "They'd either kill each other, or swap conditioner. I'd buy tickets, that's for damned sure."

------

It was after midnight now - about the time when everyone started to get too damned drunk to stand.

This was the time of night Genma, Kotetsu, and Izumo always headed toward their favorite bar. Unfortunately, it was the only bar in Konoha; unless you counted the Nara house (as if nobody knew about the moonshine they kept there).

But they walked into a very different bar that night.

Konohagakure's great Hokage, the stability of their village - the very root of their power,

was passed out cold under a bar stool, lying half-naked next to an almost fully naked Sasuke.

Just a few bar-stools down, Chouji was (somehow) still conscious, but had possibly grown gills - as his head was mostly submerged in a pitcher of rice-sake.

Shikamaru and Kiba seemed almost completely sober, if you ignored the color in their cheeks.

And Hyuuga Neji?

Was trying like hell to get between Kiba's legs - his eyes out of focus, and his face flushed a deep burgundy.

"Inuzuka Kiba, you lem'me in this instant!"

How he was still able to stand, Genma couldn't tell - but it was obvious that Kiba needed another set of hands.

"Nej c'mon - I fucking told you it was too strong! Shika, a little help?"

"You're on your own, Kiba - he's your Hyuuga."

"Lem'me in!"

Suddenly, Neji's weight shifted changed. He smiled drunkenly, letting his legs give out from beneath him.

And if Kiba's reflexes weren't above average, Neji's plan might not have worked. But as soon as Kiba caught him, Neji's arms began to explore beneath the Inuzuka's jacket. Shikamaru was laughing, now.

"Serves you right, y'know."

"Shika! He's trying to- !"

"Inuzuka Kiba, you have - this is a nice chest, did you know?"

Kotetsu and Izumo had already made quick work of the Hokage and his consort, and took off at a run out of the bar. They seemed to be under the impression that they were protecting Konoha's integrity.

Genma wrapped both arms tightly around Neji, trying to pry him away from Kiba.

Unfortunately, his aim (even drunk) seemed to be pretty good. Genma stumbled away from the bar, cupping his right eye and cursing vividly.

Neji, on the other hand, had gone back to exploring Kiba's very flushed,

very bare,

chest.

And Kiba didn't seem to mind, anymore.

"Shikamaru! Help me get them out of here before they get all of us thrown out!"

"...But then, who's going to save Chouji if he drowns?"

"Get over here!"

Shika sighed, realizing how very stuck he was to the task at hand. "This is such a drag."

It took them almost half an hour to finally drag the two outside.

Kiba seemed sober enough to bring Neji back to the Inuzuka compound with him (which was just fine with Genma, who was well above his usual level of patience - and without a single drink); while Shikamaru escorted an unconscious (finally) Chouji back home.

While pretending to be drunk, so that he couldn't explain himself.

---------------------

The next morning was too fucking bright.

Neji could barely block out the sun streaming through the window, and he couldn't find the damned sheet.

Where were his sheets? He always wrapped them and set them right.....

The feeling of skin against skin jolted Neji, almost right out of a bed that was, in fact, not his.

Beside him, completely naked and reeking of stale sake, was Inuzuka Kiba.

At any other moment in time, under any other circumstances (and devoid of influential substances) Neji might have found lying in the arms of an Inuzuka repulsive.

But for one reason or another (he may even blame the hang over later), Neji stayed.