As promised, here's the next chapter. I hope you all enjoy it. Here it is; Alice and Jasper's first time meeting Emmet and Edward, but mostly just Edward. I'm afraid Rosalie and Emmet are sorely underrepresented in this story, sorry.
Enjoy.
~Allora
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Esme had been only too willing to accompany me on my shopping trip the next day - she thought it was a little funny that I had decided to commandeer what I now knew was Edward's room - and Jasper seemed terrified to leave my side. I had hoped that perhaps Carlisle and Rosalie would come too, but Carlisle was due at the hospital and Rosalie was being a bit standoffish. I didn't explicitly know why, but I figured Jasper's presence had something to do with it. I don't think she liked him.
Not that Jasper had been particularly warm to any of them either. I realized it wasn't really in his nature to like people. It was more in his nature to size people up and deem how much of a threat they were. And for the moment, Rosalie seemed like the biggest threat. I thanked my lucky stars that I was small enough to not pose a significant threat to him. Would he ever have come with me if I looked as imposing as Rosalie? It seemed unlikely.
I paused in the furniture store we were shopping at in Prince George. There wasn't a whole lot of choice, but the bedroom set before me appealed to me; a light varnished oak four post bed that was a little blockier and more rustic than I had imagined, but it still seemed to fit. I ran my hand over the matching dresser and frowned.
Now would be a good time to ask him. Esme had left us alone for a few minutes to pick up some things she wanted to buy and there was no one else within listening distance, not that I cared what the humans thought anyway. I was making such a big deal over something so small. It's not like sharing a room with Jasper had any of the same connotations as it did for humans. It wasn't as though we had to sleep next to each other night after night, we didn't sleep. It simply meant that his things and my things would be kept together. That we would share a sanctuary. And I wanted him to share the sanctuary I was creating with me. I liked the idea of his things next to mine, it made it seem like we really belonged together. But what if he didn't want to?
"What's wrong?" Jasper asked, arms immediately around me in a sheltering hug as he warily surveyed our surroundings. His eyes fell on a grinning salesman who promptly turned and hurried away when he caught Jasper glaring at him. "Why are you nervous? What did you see?"
I looked up at him and kissed the bottom of his chin softly. "Jasper, I want to ask you something."
He looked at me suspiciously and raised an eyebrow. "Okay."
I hesitated and he frowned. The longer I waited, the more anxious I would get, making him more anxious in turn. It was best to just get it over with. "Well, I know Esme offered you one of the rooms on the second floor, but I wanted to know if maybe you'd . . . like to share my room with me instead?" The last part came out so fast if almost sounded like a single word.
His frown deepened and he let me go, taking a wide step away. "I don't think that's such a good idea, Alice."
"Please, Jasper." I pleaded.
"No." He said firmly.
I winced and couldn't help the hurt I felt. This rejection stung so much more than any other had because there was no silver lining to it. It wasn't that he didn't love me yet, but he would still follow me blindly across the continent. It wasn't that he didn't want me physically, but rather that he wanted to protect my virtue. This time it was simply that he didn't want to share a room with me. Period. No gentle let down.
Was I simply a means to an end? The means that had brought him to the Cullen's where he could learn a new way of life, and now that he was here he no longer needed me? I didn't want to believe that. I didn't want to feel used, so I forced myself to remember the way he had sheltered me as soon as he had felt I was nervous. Surely that counted for something, or did he merely think of me as breakable and weak? Someone that needs protecting because she's unable to take care of herself, even in a furniture shop?
I turned away from him, feigning memorizing the model number of the dressers, before I began walking away, eyes burning with my inability to shed tears. He groaned and a wave of soothing peace and serenity enveloped me.
"Don't, Jasper." I said as irritably as I could manage under the influence of his ability.
He sighed in annoyance and shadowed me broodingly, withdrawing his tranquility, as I took a piece of paper off one of the sales people's desks and scribbled down all the model numbers I wanted. The bed set, a desk, a vanity, a book case, a mirror and two dressers; not the three I had imagined and hoped for. I handed it to the lady behind the desk, scarcely looking at it. "I want these. And I'll need them delivered tonight." I ordered somewhat brusquely.
The woman behind the desk, her name tag labeled her as Maggie, began meticulously filling out the my order. "Now where was it you wanted it all delivered, hon?" She asked after several minutes had passed.
Esme appeared then and rattled off the address of the Cullen house just outside of Fort Nelson. The woman's eyebrows shot up into her hairline. "But that's almost ten hours away. There's no way we can get a driver to go that far tonight. It's already three in the afternoon."
I nodded. "I will give the driver an extra fifty dollars on top of all the delivery fees if they'll drive it tonight." I said, fishing a stack of bills out of my purse.
Maggie's jaw dropped a little, then she nodded curtly. "Let me talk to the drivers." She muttered distractedly as she got up from her desk and hurried away.
"How do you have so much money?" Esme asked suspiciously.
"I wasn't always as honest as I'm being now." I said evasively, then relented. "Human banks are only too easy to break into. Especially in 1923."
Esme shook her head disapprovingly but couldn't help the small smile that played on her lips. I laughed. I didn't look at Jasper; I wouldn't have been able to look at his face without feeling the sting of rejection again.
Money can move mountains. Maggie returned, told me there would be no problem with the delivery and that the truck was being loaded as we spoke. I paid for my goods with my own money, for the first time in decades, and we left the store, racing back home in Esme's car.
The delivery truck arrived at the house only two hours after we did.
"Alice." Jasper stopped me after we'd dragged all the boxes up to my new room and put all of Edward's thing into the garage. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt your feelings."
"I'm fine." I lied as I viciously tore into the first box. He raised his eyebrow and looked pointedly at me. "I will be fine." I amended. "Just go read a book or something downstairs. Your hovering is making me uncomfortable."
He frowned, I thought I saw a little hurt in his eyes, but he nodded and disappeared. I felt horrible, but I just wanted to suffer alone for a bit. I wanted time to be alone with my emotions. He hadn't moved more than three feet from my side all day. I didn't know how far his gift ranged, but I hope the two stories that now separated us would be enough of a buffer zone.
Pulling pieces of my furniture out of their boxes. I constructed the pieces mindlessly as I lost myself in my feelings. I wondered if I was overreacting, it wasn't that he didn't want to be with me, just that he didn't want to share a room with me. But I shook the thought away. No, even just now he had said he didn't want to hurt my feelings, not that he didn't mean to.
But if that was the case, then why was he still being so protective? Was I really so pathetic in his eyes that I needed constant supervision? Really, even if I couldn't take care of myself, what harm would come to me here, in the safety of our own home? But I could take care of myself, I reminded myself petulantly. It had been me, not Jasper, who had finished off the crazed newborn that had attacked us before. I had saved him, protected him. Not the other way around.
And, of course, I didn't regret it at all. I quelled that vindictive thought before it could fully form. I didn't want Jasper to ever be in pain. Ever. My mind flickered to that tiniest trace of hurt on his face when I'd sent him away. Did I regret that? . . . I would make it up to him. Later. After. I needed space to think and feel first. Then I would apologize. Then I would do what I could to make him feel better. After I felt better.
But would I feel better? Were there any answers in his gestures? In his words? How did he feel?All I wanted was his heart. Not even that. All I wanted was for him to take my heart. I just wanted him to hold onto it and keep it safe. That was all I was asking for. I could endure if he didn't love me, just so long as he let me love him. That wasn't so hard, was it? Relatively effortless. He just had to put up with me.
Or was that the problem? He didn't want to put up with me? That thought hurt more than all the others combined. Maybe if I acted more like him, maybe if I was more reserved, he could tolerate my company better. I could try. I could be demure, distant, soft-spoken. I could be, if I tried.
I would have to try very hard. It wasn't my nature at all, but I would do it. Because Jasper Whitlock was worth fighting for. And then, when he saw what I could be for him - I could be anything he wanted - then he wouldn't mind my company so much. Maybe he would enjoy it even. Maybe then he'd even grow to like me too, to love me. Yes, I would try.
The bedroom set didn't take nearly enough time to put together. My mind had been made up, but I was reluctant to go downstairs and put it into action. Not because the prize wasn't worth it, but rather because it meant leaving pieces of myself behind. I sat down in the middle of the bed and frowned. Once, he had said he liked me, the real me, hadn't he? But no, he just liked my emotional climate. So if I could act serious while I felt happy, then he should doubly like me, shouldn't he?
The front door opened and I heard unfamiliar footsteps enter. Edward and Emmet? Then I heard a cacophony of low, angry snarls.
Jasper!
I was out the door and down the first flight of stairs without another thought. As I cleared the landing, I was able to see the scene unfolding below. Edward and Emmet were crouched low in the doorway, ready to attack. Jasper was standing very erect next to the couch, an opened book on the floor next to him. He was eying the newcomer's with a challenging sneer, as though daring them to make a move.
I leaped over the railing, dropping from the loft to the first floor, and landed at Jasper's side. He grabbed my arm instantly and pushed me behind him, not taking his eyes away from Edward and Emmet. I laid my hand calmly on his arm and stepped out from behind him.
Edward straightened up first, followed more reluctantly by Emmet, who kept eying Jasper like a human might have to a rabid dog. Carlisle and Esme were in the doorway leading to the kitchen and Rosalie had suddenly appeared at Emmet's shoulder.
"Edward. Emmet." I said as cheerfully as my new, reserved character would allow. "So nice to finally meet you." I said as I left Jasper's side to give each of my new brother's a hug. Jasper growled almost inaudibly. "I'm Alice. This is Jasper. We've joined your family."
The tension in the room was almost tangible. I stepped back to Jasper's side and looked at him pointedly. "You could help a little, you know." I whispered low enough so the other's wouldn't hear.
Very light, subtle pulses of calm began drifting around the room. I took a deep breath and Emmet smiled sheepishly at us. "Sorry, got a bit carried away, I guess."
"I take it that you're the reason all my things are in the garage?" Edward asked.
"My fault, Edward." Esme piped up as she and Carlisle came further into the room. "I told Alice she could have any room she wanted."
"Hmph." He said awkwardly.
Now that it became apparent there wasn't going to be a fight, Rosalie dragged Emmet off to have some together time. I was a little jealous that they could have together time, while Jasper and I couldn't, because Jasper didn't want to. I pushed those thoughts forcefully away.
"I didn't see your piano, Edward. I expected it to be in your room." I said conversationally as Carlisle and Esme slipped back into the kitchen.
He looked perturbed for a moment and I realized I'd gotten ahead of myself again. He didn't know that I knew he played. Didn't know that I'd sat for hours listening to his music. "Right. You see the future." He said with an awkward click of his tongue.
Jasper tensed beside me again but I smiled. "And you do . . what? I've seen that you can do something, but I'm not sure what. Can you do the same as me?" I asked.
He paused, eying me up, then watching Jasper carefully for a moment. "I read minds." He finally admitted. Jasper growled.
Oh. Well that made some thing's I'd seen make a lot more sense. It gave some of the half conversations I'd been an invisible witness to make a lot more sense. "Huh." I managed to say. I wondered how that must feel. Did he hear everyone's voices all at once or could he target it? I imagined for a moment what it would have been like it I saw everyone's futures simultaneously. It would have been maddening.
Edward chuckled. "It is sometimes."
My jaw dropped a little. "Are you? Did you just?" I spluttered.
"Yes. Sorry." He confirmed.
How did the rest of the Cullen's stand it? Was there no privacy while Edward was around? How could they have private thoughts and secrets with Edward around? And I'd thought Jasper's ability to know what I was feeling was difficult to work around. Imagine the trouble being around Edward was going to be, when my brother could read all my thoughts.
Then I stopped lamenting the loss of privacy as I thought of what it must be like for him. The poor guy. Could he block it all out? He must have some way of managing it. Ugh, being able to hear the thoughts of all his family members must not always be a treat for him either. Especially with all the couples he lived with. I remembered my brief visit to Rosalie and Emmet's futures and the sheer awkwardness of intruding on their intimacy. Imagine someone's thoughts shouting that at him.
Edward laughed. "Alright, Alice. I suppose we'll keep you. Your thoughts are very refreshing. Very humorous." He said. The way he said it made it sound like I was a stray puppy that had wandered in and needed to prove itself worthy of being kept. I guess, in some ways, it was true. It wasn't so far off the mark. Just a couple of strays, Jasper and I, looking for a place to call home.
"Why so curious about my piano?" Edward asked as he closed the wide-open front door behind him and took off his jacket.
I shrugged. "It's just that, almost every time I've seen you, you've been sitting at the piano. I was beginning to think you were attached to the thing." I laughed.
"Piano's in the basement. I never spent much time in my room anyway." Edward said with a shrug. I realized then that Jasper hadn't said a word since the Cullen boys had returned home. I squeezed his hand but he was staring darkly at Edward. "He's saying plenty to me, Alice." Edward said sharply.
"Nice things, I hope." I said, knowing that he wasn't.
"Right." Edward said awkwardly. "Well, welcome to the family anyway. I'll be in the basement."
Edward disappeared down the hall and down a flight of stairs, leaving Jasper and I standing in the living room, hands joined. "Jasper." I said disappointedly. "You are very easy to be around, when you want to be. Can be charming even. I wish you would let other people see that."
"I don't like him in my head." He said darkly.
"I'm sure he doesn't like it any more than you do." I said softly.
Jasper grunted in response as a muted stream of music filtered up from the basement. It was a very beautiful, slow song with long, haunting pauses. It was a sad song that brought to mind all too clearly those day's when my future had been blinded from me. I closed my eyes as I listened to the melody. It wasn't an unwelcome kind of sadness that it brought to mind. That chapter of my life was, after all, over now. I had my future. Jasper was with me, unwillingly as he may be, and we had found the Cullen's who had welcomed us with open arms. All that remained was settling in, getting to know my family, and winning Jasper's heart.
Jasper dropped back down onto the sofa and pulled the book back into his lap, quickly finding his page. "Do you want to be alone?" I asked tentatively. Everything about his posture was dismissive and deflective.
"Just go down there and listen, Alice. Don't worry about me." He said wearily.
"Okay. I'll leave you alone for a bit." I whispered, hiding my hurt. I suppose his dismissal was just revenge for me sending him away earlier.
Sighing heavily, I followed the path Edward had taken downstairs. The song changed into something quicker. I recognized it immediately, he played this one often.
"Thank you, Edward." Esme called from somewhere above.
"This one's Esme's favorite." Edward explained as he gestured for me to sit on the bench next to him.
I sat and he continued playing without pause. I didn't know how to play, had never actually lain a hand on a piano before, but I liked it. Not just the music, but the instrument itself too. It was a work of art in and of itself; a beautiful contraption built to emit beautiful sounds. I liked the permanence of the thing. I had never had a piano because I'd never had anywhere to put it. I think, if I had had somewhere to put one, I would have bought one just to admire, even without being able to play it. This was the kind of thing one only found in a home. Well, a home or a concert hall. A permanent thing in a permanent home. It was comforting.
"It's very nice." I said. I was, by no means, a music expert. Over the years, fashion was basically the only human thing I'd payed attention to. Music had changed. Buildings. Cars. Ideals. These things held little interest to me at all. But for the sake of not drawing undue attention to myself, I had kept up with the times on the issue of clothing. But music, this music, soft and enchanting as it flowed from it's ebony maker, made me regret my lack of interest. It was nothing like, completely incomparable to, the scratchy songs that had clawed their way out of countless jukeboxes in diners across the states.
"Thank you." Edward said as the song morphed into another slow, sad sounding song.
I frowned. It was very odd to think that he had just heard my whole reasoning, my whole interpretation of his music. How much more he must glean from people. How much better his judge of character must be, being able to look in and see all the tiny facets of their brain's inner workings. Even now he was listening to me muse. I laughed. "Are you always . . . Or can you turn it off?"
He smiled. "I try not to listen, for the most part. Some voices are harder for me to block out than others. Yours, for example. And your friend upstairs' 'voice' is also incredibly loud."
"Jasper." I corrected automatically, then grimaced. My friend. Only a friend. "I'm sorry about Jasper. He doesn't really like people, I don't think."
"Yes, I gathered as much." Edward said with a wry smile, fingers still dancing over the piano keys. "He seems to like you well enough though. He's very protective of you, isn't he?"
I sighed. Yes, Jasper was very protective of me. Why? I wasn't quite sure. The same question that had plagued me all evening came clawing back into my consciousness. Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why couldn't he love me back when I loved him so so so much? Why couldn't he just be content with letting me love him? He couldn't even stand my company at the moment.
That wasn't fair. I was the one who had banished him earlier that afternoon. I'm sure he needed alone time sometimes just as much as I did.
"Ah. I see."
"I hope he didn't think anything too . . . mean." I said, wincing.
"You don't need to apologize for anything. Let Jasper think what he wants. I'll pretend I didn't hear any of it." Edward
replied, his fingers never pausing over the piano keys.
