We flew back to the island and dropped Scott of in the lab, then started back downstairs. My dread was growing as my feet hit each step. "Victor?"

"Yes?"

"Please don't tell me that we have to go hunt down Fred and John now."

"We don't."

"Good."

"We already know where they are."

The blood drained from my face. "Damn," I breathed.

"You're not going to chicken out, are you?"

"It's one thing hunting down little brats I've never met before. I don't give a shit. It's a whole different can of beans when it comes to people I know and care for."

"A whole different can of beans?" he asked with a smirk.

"Shut up! This is serious! I refuse to lay a finger to either one!"

"Who said you had to? Just come with me and be intimidating."

"And stand by and watch while you murder them? I can't…"

"Elena, please don't do this!" he cried, spinning around. I had been following him closely and hadn't predicted his abrupt stop, so I collided into him. He lost his footing and slipped off the edge of a step. I tried to grab his coat and hold him up, but the momentum was throwing me off balance. His falling and my grip on his coat pulled me as well. Before I could even gasp, we were tumbling down the stairwell, crashing into the walls, he metal stairs digging into our flesh. Finally, we landed with a bone cracking thud on the cement floor at the base of the steps. It took me a moment to realize that I was smooshed under him, his bulky torso on top of mine, restricting my air flow. I groaned and shoved him off. He made an attempt to roll off to help in my effort. He landed on his back with a mix of a groan and a huff. I laid there and allowed my bruises to heal. "I think I cracked my shin bone," Victor said.

"Only us. We are the only two people capable of causing each other to fall down the steps." Distantly, I could hear Nesha chortling in her cage. She had apparently seen and/or heard the entire ordeal.

"SHUT UP, NESHA!" Victor hollered. She just laughed all the harder.

Stryker came tentatively walking down the steps. "Um, are you two ok?"

"We're fine," I growled, struggling to stand.

"Are you sure?"

I starred daggers at him. He just held up his hands and retreated back up the stairs. I finally got myself hoisted to my feet and offered a hand to Victor. He took it and stood up as well. My will power had long since left me. "Where is Fred and John?"

"Las Vegas," Victor said, still slightly in pain.

I sighed and rubbed the bridge of my nose. "Alright."

"You're so gullible!"

"No I'm not! I'm just tired of fighting with you about this! I'm tired of trying to change you even when I know I can't!"

"That sounds like a personal problem." I reached out and punched him as hard I could. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath to keep calm. "Do you have to hit me every time you get mad?" he asked through clenched teeth.

"You hit me when you get mad! And you get mad a lot!"

"I only hit you when I'm mad AT YOU!"

"Well, I am mad at you!! I'm mad as hell! Not just at you…I…I just…" I couldn't form any lucid thoughts, I was so mad and conflicted. I stalked away from him and burst out the door into the cool evening air. Every fiber of my body was quivering with anger and regret and hate and, shockingly, fear. I was afraid of myself, I hated what I was doing, I regretted ever getting involved, and I was angry with Victor for pulling me into it. He knew…KNEW I wouldn't be able to resist him. Everything busted loose. I looked up at the sky and screamed at the rising moon. I grabbed up some of the gravel and threw it as far and hard as my arm would allow, screaming and yelling incomprehensible cusses as I did it. I kicked a huge rock at the building. It hit off the wall, shattering into a million pieces. It only made me feel more hopeless. Those walls were impermeable. I screamed at the walls, I screamed at the nuclear hubs, I screamed at the NYC lights, I screamed at all the lucky people who had no idea what horrors were going on around them, and above all, I screamed at everything within me that was fighting it out in my head. I wanted it to stop. I wanted to be free of the confliction. No more bouncing between the animal and my morals. But, no matter how much I wanted it, I knew it wouldn't come. As long as Victor was in the picture, I would have no peace, but just imagining him gone was like running myself through with red hot pokers. And just imagining him gone made me burst into tears. I wrapped my arms around my torso and slowly lowered to my knees, attempting to hold myself together. Tears were pouring down my face and my entire body was shaking from the sobs. The gravel was making painful indentions in my knees and shins, but I ignored them. I moaned and leaned forward until my forehead was pressed to the ground. Usually, I would have been ashamed of my tears, but I let my sobs ring out for all to hear. I had held them in for too long. I though of Fred, and John, and Logan and I cried all the more. I cried for Wade, and Nesha, and Bradley. It felt like my heart was being torn out of my chest, still beating. Everything hurt. I abruptly realized that I missed Logan. I wanted one of his comforting hugs. I wanted to hear him say it would be ok. I wanted to hear him say 'I forgive you.' "LOGAN!!!" I screamed into the stones. The emptiness and silence that answered me wasn't surprising, but it stung. I finally just completely laid down and stayed there, in a fetal position.

I don't know how long I laid there. The moon had risen high overhead before Victor came looking for me. He saw me and sighed, pained. He came over and laid down beside me. I scooted closer to take advantage of his warmth. I could see my breath by that time. "I would ask what you're doing," he said, "but I get the feeling that I wouldn't get an answer."

"I don't have an answer," I responded hoarsely.

"That's ok. I don't need one." He easily grabbed me up and put me atop his chest. I started quietly crying again, and I buried my face in his shirt to his the tears. He stroked my hair, quietly purring, "Shh. It's going to be ok."

"No, it's not!" I cried into his chest. "You have motivation! A cause! A reason! What do I have? There's Nesha, but I can fight for her. I don't have to protect her by killing people."

"If you fight, you know they'll kill you, and once they have they'll kill her!"

"I'd rather die than kill!" He didn't answer. I made myself stop crying and look up at him. "What's happening to me? I used to be just like you. A killer and proud of if."

"Who said I was proud of it? I may enjoy it, but you're not always proud of things you enjoy."

"True, but I really want to know. What's changing me? Why, all of a sudden, does the thought of killing make me sick? I fought in two wars without a single qualm. Sure, I didn't know the men I was killing, but…"

"You're just more human than me."

My face contorted into pure confusion. "Wait, what?"

"You're more human than beast. I'm more beast than human. Those 6 years away did you good. You learned what it's like to have feelings and morals beyond your instinct."

"What about you?"

"I fell more into instinct."

"Is that my fault?"

"I didn't say it was."

"But is it?"

He was quiet as he thought through his answer. Finally, "Partially, I suppose. If you hadn't left, I wouldn't have gone so crazy, but it's my fault for turning to the dark side. The beast instead of the human part."

"That's just the way you are, Victor. You've always been a little darker souled. I thought I was too."

"Apparently not."

"I'm darker than Nesha though. And Logan."

"You haven't met the new Jimmy."

"What do you mean?"

"Stryker wanted the animal in Jimmy, so he would do things he otherwise wouldn't. Making him believe Kayla was dead accomplished that."

"All this backstabbing and betrayal is getting old."

"What choice do we have?"

I groaned and laid my head back on his chest. "So here we are," I said quietly. "Beauty and the Beast under an enchanted moon." I giggled. "Yeah, right. A girl can dream though."

He purred contentedly. "That's not so far fetched. I don't think anyone had enchanted the moon, but the rest seems accurate."

"You know, it's things like that that keep me around. For all your not so subtle darker tendencies, those sweet, soft moments convince me to hang around and see what happens."

"Why do you think I say them?"

I chuckled, "Oh, you mean them somewhere deep in that heart of yours."

He put a finger under my chin and pulled my lips to his. "Are you quite certain?" he mumbled.

I looked him deep in the eyes and answered, "Yes."