Author's Notes: Because I'm just so evil. But, luckily, the reader knows something more than Squall here so they aren't as shocked, right?

Chapter 1

Think of the sun and the sand and the beaches Squall. That was exactly how the other man had put it. It will be fun Squall. That was the ploy. Come on Squall, don't you want to meet my family? The persistence had been annoying. You haven't had a vacation in years Squall. Logic backed up all of the other man's arguments, but Squall refused to see it that way. You need to get away from here Squall, away from the memories and the pain. A part of him wholly agreed with that idea, but refused to admit it. I knew him too Squall. That was where he caved.

For all the persistence and the logic and the worry in the other man, Squall had only abandoned his stubbornness when another person was hinted at. He'd always known Irvine was from the west coast. He had noticed the fact that Irvine had taken his revelation that he'd known Nida a little hard. And the sudden interest in learning about the man Squall had known, had loved, was something he should have noticed. But how was he really to know that Irvine had gone to the same school and Nomura and Yamamoto? That they had been friends…

And so he was here now, lying stretched out on a beach towel under an umbrella. Several yards away was Irvine, playing in the ocean and repeatedly dunking a very unhappy blond over and over in the salt water. While he'd assented to coming to LA, Squall was pretty sure he'd gotten it through to his lover that the beach was out of the question. They were here anyway, and despite his best efforts, Squall couldn't remember how or why. In fact, he wasn't even sure he had packed swim trunks for their week long vacation, but he had them on anyway. There was, of course, nothing he could do about any of this except enjoy it and watch Irvine continue to torment his step-brother.

After a few moments, as if sensing the attention he was now getting, Irvine ran from the water, leaving the tattooed blond behind, and flopped down next to Squall on the beach towel. A voice in the back of his mind told Squall that were this Seifer the older man would have that demonic little smirk, and Nida would just smile softly at him, the way he always had. Irvine was neither Seifer nor Nida, and when he smiled it was a smile full of laughter. At least, as full of laughter as the laid back man ever got. It was all Squall wanted though.

"Did you enjoy trying to drown him?" the brunet asked in an offhand manner, adjusting the sunglasses he wore.

"He's springy. He'll bounce right back," Irvine assured him, still smiling.

Sure enough Zell popped out of the water and came storming towards them. Well, not them as much as Irvine, but the cowboy had deserved it. He'd been teasing and taunting his brother for the whole of their vacation, which was only two days old at this point, but that was still a lot of teasing. Zell did seem like the sort to handle teasing well of course, as long as it was all good natured fun. Good thing Irvine was about as good natured as they came.

When first Squall had laid eyes upon Zell, seen the way the blond had embraced Irvine, he had assumed they had formerly been involved. Cousins he could have accepted, but brothers had caused him much mystery. His mind hadn't leapt to the logical step-brother tag that suited them, but the more he watched the two the more he was sure of it. In appearances they could not be more different. Zell was blond, tan, and amazingly vibrant with a tribal style tattoo reaching up the side of his face. Irvine had auburn hair, fair skin, and was exceedingly long and lean. Zell was hyper-active and constantly talking and he never stopped moving. Irvine was laid back, contemplative, and was always up to just sit around quietly with Squall. And yet, somehow, neither of them found the happy blond irritating.

"See what I mean?" Irvine said as Zell sat down in front of them in the sand. The young businessman grinned, and Squall couldn't help but chuckle. There was sand visible in his TEETH.

"Did you give him a sand-wich?" the historian couldn't help but ask. When Irvine and Zell gave him an odd look he gestured towards the blond's mouth, and Irvine proceeded to crack up.

"I suppose I did…"

Zell began to frantically attempt to scrub the sand from his teeth with the back of his hand, which did little good as the hand too was covered with sand.

"The chicken will figure it out soon enough," Irvine said through the snickers. Then, once he had himself under control he slowly turned to regard Squall. The look far beneath that fake violet was lined with concern.

"So, you doing alright up here all alone?"

The question was really meant to test the waters and Squall knew it. Irvine often concerned himself with how often thoughts would turn to Nida, or at least he did so now that he knew just who Squall was in relation to the man. The concern would most likely die down a bit as they got further away from the anniversary of the death, but then they'd be approaching Nida's birthday, and if Irvine knew that he'd get worried all over again. Times like these Squall almost regretted telling Irvine about the man.

"I'm fine," Squall insisted, keeping his voice firm and calm. No one questioned him when he took that tone.

"You sure?"

Okay, apparently Zell questioned that tone. Then again, Zell questioned a lot of things.

"I'm very sure. But if you continue to question me, you will not be so fine."

The blond just grinned and stood up to brush sand from his rapidly drying body. "So, you two going to come to the club tonight?"

Zell, Squall had learned mere minutes after meeting the man, had come to own a very popular club that was within walking distance of where they now sat. The place was a hotspot for teens and young adults, and Zell had been determined to drag Irvine and Squall along to admire his new found source of income and amusement. Currently Squall was doing his best to decline, but Irvine seemed to want to go more and more every time his brother mentioned it. And Squall couldn't play the 'what would your parents think if I didn't have dinner with them' card because apparently Martine and his wife (Ma Dincht as she insisted upon being called) frequented the place. Squall really couldn't get a handle on that fact because he couldn't, for the life of him, imagine his mother allowing his father to drag them off to some club. Laguna would be all for it, but Raine was the one in charge of the family really.

"I don't know Zell, I wanted to…"

"Of course we'll come," Irvine said, cutting into Squall's attempt at refusing in the politest way possible. "Squall could use a little taste of the real Californian life!"

The brunet just rolled his eyes. This was not going to be fun. At this rate Irvine or Zell was going to suggest going out to buy something for him to wear, and Squall hated buying clothes.

"Well then, we've got to go out and get you something to wear!" Zell insisted, bouncing around on the balls of his feet. A part of Squall, maybe some instinct he had never before listened to in his life, wanted to punch the other man for being so impulsive and proving his thoughts right.

"I don't see why not," Irvine agreed, standing to take down the umbrella. "Squall could use some real clothes after all."

"Hey!" the man in question protested, jumping to his own feet, "I do have real clothes!"

"Dude, you're a historian," Zell said, stressing the word, "All you've got is that stuffy nerd stuff."

"It's not nerd stuff!"

"Did you bring even one set of t-shirt and jeans with you?"

"Nope, he didn't," Irvine happily provided. "And don't worry baby, I've got you covered money wise."

Squall sighed and started to fold up the towel. This was going to be a very interesting afternoon. Irvine out with money was bad enough as it was. He was, after all, doing rather well with his psychology practice. Already he had been taken in to work with a leading private practice, who had him handle some of the couples therapy and such. One day the man intended to have his own practice, but for now he was quite happy spending the money he made on Squall rather than saving up for that day. Sometimes, it was good having a wealthy boyfriend. This was not one of those times.

"And, if he behaves, we could totally take him to this great little Japanese café, store place I told you about Irvine."

Instantly Squall perked up. That would be worth the pain of shopping with the brothers. More than worth it.

--------

By the time the trio made it to the place Zell had spoken of it was already getting to be early evening. Irvine's arms were laden with bags, but they were mostly for himself and Zell than really for Squall. The brunet was rather proud that he'd been able to dissuade Irvine from buying him those leather pants that they had insisted he try on, but that hadn't stopped Irvine from buying him more than he wanted. All he had desired was a single pair of pants and a shirt fitting for their night at the club he really didn't want to go to. Was that too much to ask?

Still, upon entering the place, Squall couldn't help but be instantly cheered. To one side it seemed to be a place focused upon the selling of imported Japanese furniture, art, clothing and other odds and ends, while another side was designed like a little tea parlor. There weren't places like this back home, nothing like them. It was beautiful and very simplistic in the complexity. Traditional and modern all in one fell swoop.

"I'm moving in here," Squall announced to the brothers before leaving them behind so that he might inspect a painted screen.

"I heard you were big on Japanese history from Irvine, so when I found this place, I knew I was going to have to show you it someday. It's owned by this really nice couple…"

"Mister Dincht," a voice came from towards the back of the shop. Following it was a tall, dark man, who was as lean as he was long. There was grace in his movements, perhaps enhanced by the rather tighter fitting clothes he wore. The body said twenties, but the eyes suggested older, and Squall couldn't help but stare. Well, he stared until Irvine elbowed him in the ribs.

"It is a pleasure to see you back so soon. And with friends," the man said, coming up to them and bowing his head the slightest bit.

"Yo Kiros. You know I couldn't stay away for long. Have to get that sandalwood carving I was looking at last time. Oh… Yeah… This is my brother Irvine. And this guy is Squall. Hands off of course, he's Irvine's."

The older man smiled softly, "You know I would not do so, Mister Dincht. I have my eyes elsewhere."

To this the blond smiled, "Great. Uh, can we get some tea before we start browsing?"

Kiros nodded and gestured for the group to proceed him into the tea area. "You are quite lucky. I just took out the good green tea for myself."

"Is the boss in today?" Zell asked, sitting down awkwardly at the table. Irvine sat with more grace, used to low tables because of several being present in Squall's home. One of which Irvine didn't know belonged to Nida. Squall sat with a sigh, upset that his mind had wandered to the asian yet again. Maybe it was the atmosphere that did it. The place did, after all, have the asian touch, and almost looked like how Nida had suggested they decorate the apartment were they to ever live together.

"You're in luck. He's due in soon. Had to go pick up a new shipment of those handmade katanas you are so fond of."

"More katanas? Awesome!" Zell said, his ever present grin widening.

"I'm sure he'll be happy to know some won't even have a chance to be set out on display. He's been worried about where we are going to put them all, as if they all do not eventually go home with you or him."

Kiros and Zell shared a chuckle there before a sharp whistling cut in and the older man quickly excused himself to a back room to fetch the teapot. While he was gone Zell shifted several times, all while explaining the appearance of the last five swords he had bought. Irvine, of course, did his best to silence the blond, knowing just how much thoughts of such weapons turned the mind of Squall to his former lover. And the blond, oblivious to the attempts, just continued talking.

The older man soon returned with the teapot and the four sat together, enjoying the hot drink as Kiros explained much of the business that his partner had set up. Things would have continued for quite a while were it not for a set of chimes calling out that someone had entered the store. Kiros smiled and stood to meet his partner, and Zell bounced to his feet to help the man with the boxes and the man hidden behind them. Irvine was about to get up and help his brother when Squall's hand alighted upon his knee, stilling him.

In an instant he had come to recognize Kiros's business, and probably bed, partner for who and what he was. It didn't matter that the eyes were emerald green instead of coffee brown. There was nothing taken away by the fact that the man wore a green shirt with a high collar to hide burn marks that just barely peeked over the edge. Even the sheer length of the raven black hair that was used to hide part of the delicate face didn't stop him from knowing. No matter how it was changed he knew that shape, that face, that man too well for any changes to hide him.

Slowly Squall rose from his seat, and with the biggest sound he could manage, which was barely above a whisper, cleared his throat.

The eyes of the store owner instantly moved to where Squall stood, and after a second the brunet could see the shock, the fear, the worry, and the love in that gaze.

"Squall."

His name was barely more than a breath from the other man, and yet his heart raced at the sound. Four years without those eyes on him. Four years without that voice in his ears. Four years without the man he had so loved… Four years that he'd know just what he'd say if he ever saw him again…

"You bastard," Squall hissed in Japanese. Kiros and the man flinched back, understanding the insult. Zell and Irvine looked from Squall to the owner and back in shock.

Squall didn't hesitate to flee the place, pushing past Zell and Kiros to get to the door.

He didn't stop running, even when he was utterly lost. He didn't want to be found. He didn't want to go back.

Nida Nomura, the love of his life, his best friend, a serial killer, had been buried in the ground four years and three days ago.

Nida Nomura…

Was alive.