Dear Diary,
I am the most annoyed elf in the universe. Stupid Thranduil and stupid Legolas are coming with some other stupid elves to Caras Galadhon next week. Stupid Galadriel for letting them! I would say stupid Celeborn for letting her let them, but we all know that she wears the pants in that relationship. I'm not even saying that to be mean like I usually do, as Celeborn has been unusually nice to me. He's been like that ever since Galadriel gave away his cloaks. I'm still not sure if I like the change: ask again next week when I'll have made up my mind. By the way, I did tell him about the bird incident: We laughed at my brother's expense, even though he was standing right there.
Which reminds me, Poopie stole my favorite pair of socks before I got dressed today. They're really long and especially fluffy, and I miss them since I still haven't broken in the boots I'm wearing today. Which, by the way, I "borrowed" from Haldir's closet, as he won't be needing them, and I look better in them anyways.
Oh, and I told him that he needed to shave his legs if he wanted to get girls(or guys) and he threw an empty quiver at me. Now I have a bruise on the side of my face, although even with it I'm still twice as attractive as him. I told him so too, and he just said to be glad there weren't any arrows in the quiver, and of course I had to say something back. I suggested that after he shaved his legs he could stick his arrows in Legolas' quiver, then promptly explained my theory that since Legolas liked pretty guys, that meant he liked shaved legs because they were pretty. Haldir gave me a black eye to go with the bruise, but I'm still more attractive, just not twice as attractive.
I am most relieved that Poopie got all of the bird crap washed off, as nobody wants to see his face on a good day, let alone covered in bird crap, which I told him. He took it really well, all things considered, and even complimented me on my lovely bruises. I wholeheartedly agreed with him, needless to say.
And so now everyone but me is counting down the days until those stupid pointy-eared elves arrive(Not that I'm racist or anything). Whoopee doo. Then again, I may begin planning tortures for Legolas as they will require time and preparation.