Song: That's When I'll Stop Loving You by *NSYNC. Uh… no comments on this one. At all. Stupid MP3 Player! *kills it*

The Playlist – That's When I'll Stop Loving You (Riku's POV)

"Hey… is this thing on? Hey! This is Sora! You've missed me so... uh… leave me a thing! Bye!"

That's the same message he's had since he got a cell phone a couple years ago. He either doesn't know how stupid it sounds or he doesn't know how to change it. Knowing Sora, it's probably both. And it's perfect. Just so Sora.

"Hey Sora. It's Riku again. Haven't heard from you since you ran out on me. Getting ready to leave for school now… so I guess I'll just see you at lunch." I'm sort of worried about him but not really. That's just Sora. He stayed over Friday night but something unnerved him enough when he woke up Saturday morning that he went running home. Haven't heard from him since then.

I pull the phone from my ear, flip it shut, and slip it in my pocket. Okay, so it wasn't something that flustered him. It was me. Waking up in my bed with my arms around him was probably too much for him. But I couldn't help myself. Yes, I know. I think I've known longer than him. But I know for sure that I've loved him longer. Since before all that shit happened. Oh sure, I'd tease him about Kairi and we'd compete over her but… deep inside I always hopped I was wrong about his attachment to her. And clearly, I was.

I grab my book bag and head out the front door. I can hear dad in the other room but I don't stop to say goodbye. I never do. We don't exactly see eye to eye and all. I throw my book bag in the backseat and climb in the front of my jeep. As I start it and pull out of the driveway, Sora flits to my mind again.

I've spent years trying to figure out the reason I love him, the exact moment I fell for him. And I've yet to come up with either. I just do and I feel like I always have… like… even when we were kids, I knew in the back of my head that we were meant to be together. No matter how many times I was told boys are supposed to like girls and grow up and marry girls and have babies with girls. It didn't matter, because I was going to be with Sora. I've just always known.

Which, yes, begs the question of my sexuality, with my job and all. No, I'm not a slut or whore or any other derogatory term that insinuates I'm easy and sleep around with everyone. Because I'm not and I don't. I do what I do for two reasons. One is money. I get better tips when I do what I do and I need money. Saving up to move out of my father's house. I mean… we don't have the worst relationship in the world. Yes, he's a drunk who spends more time unemployed than working. Yes, he can be strict and demanding and has slapped me around a few times when I back talk. But mostly he leaves me alone. Sometimes weeks can pass without either of us speaking to each other. So yeah… not the worst but I still want to get out of there. I'm calling a moving van the day after graduation.

I pull into the parking lot and turn the key. I'm slightly surprised to see the blue car in the assigned spot beside mine. Belongs to Sora and Roxas and since Sora's usually the one to drive, more often than not they arrive seconds before the first bell, very close cutters.

"Hey Riku!"

I turn and spy Kairi and I wave and head over. She's walking with Selphie and Tidus and they all slow until I catch up. "Hey guys. Have you seen Sora yet?"

Kairi shakes her head and smiles as she runs a hand through her reddish hair. She's really not bad to look at. She's pretty enough. She's nice enough as well. Smart and kind and a really good friend. Whoever steals her heart will be lucky, just as long as she keeps her hands off my Sora. "We just got here."

"Isn't it too early for them?" Tidus' comment elicits laughs from them and I smile. I don't exaggerate when it comes to Sora. I'm not the only one who notices the brunette's ability to show up right before the bell rings. Just like magic.

Kairi tilts her head to the side, as if thinking. "Come to think of it… I haven't heard from him since class on Friday morning."

"Saturday morning." I say, pointing to myself. "He spent the night then hightailed it out early."

"You don't suppose anything's wrong, do you?" Selphie chips in, worry lacing her voice. She's not bad to look at either but her voice does tend to take on that extremely high, squeaky tone that only dogs can hear. And she can get pretty annoying.

I shake my head and shrug slightly. "I'm sure he's fine. He had a big paper due today that he didn't start on." That's the truth even though I know it's not the reason he disappeared and won't return my phone calls.

Kairi rolls her eyes and smiles. "So he pulled a Sora, procrastinated until last minute, and blew us off."

I laugh and shrug. "Probably." It's a very Sora thing to do after all. I'm always amazed he can pass his classes. But then again, he always has me and Kairi and the rest of the gang around to help him when he needs it.

"Riku!"

Her voice fills me with dread. And I roll my eyes before I turn around. I force a smile at her as she nears. "Hey Cyndi." She smiles and bats her eyes and shit. I'm gay. I am so gay. I am completely, totally, and utterly gay. I really am. I've known forever. Cyndi does nothing for me and I've tried countless times to turn her down easily. I really have. But she just won't take the hints. "We'll have to catch up later, Cyndi. I have to meet with a teacher before class. Don't want to be late."

"Oh yes! We both do. On that project." Kairi says quickly, grabbing my hand and pulling me down the hall.

"Sorry Cyndi." I call over my shoulder at her. I catch the look of jealousy on her face and I roll my eyes. Kairi's just a friend. Nothing to be jealous over. Plus the fact that I don't like Cyndi is another reason for her to not be jealous. I'll be really glad when I graduate and can move out. She will not know where I live.

"No, you're not." Kairi giggles as we turn the corner out of sight. She lets go of me as we slow.

"You're right, I'm not." I smile and laugh and bat at her shoulder playfully. I really do enjoy having Kairi around. "She just won't take no for an answer."

Kairi glances around quickly before dropping her tone and stepping closer to me. "Maybe you should tell her you're gay."

I shrug as I stop walking and she stops and turns. "Yeah, I could." I nod slowly. "But then she'd either try harder to convert me or go blab it around." I just can't imagine her coming after me any harder than she already does. Seriously! She can't throw herself at me any harder.

"So what if she did tell?" Kairi's closer again and crossing her arms. I know what she's getting at. It's a favorite topic of hers.

I cross my own arms and look away. "So… everyone should mind their own fucking business." My tone's a little harsher than I mean it to be and I feel myself flinch slightly.

But if Kairi's noticed my tone, she doesn't react. She simply smiles smugly and continues in her berating. "In other words… the female half of your groupies might vanish."

The comment forces me to laugh and look back at her. "The ones that aren't into some good boy on boy action would."

She looks at me and wrinkles her nose. "Pervert."

My smile widens and I shake my head slowly. "Seriously. You should see some of the…"

She raises her hand to stop me. "I don't want to hear it."

She can really be a prude sometimes. But I love her for it. "Then you shouldn't have brought it up."

"You should just put the moves on Sora already."

That's the second reason I act the way I do when I'm at work. Sora. Because I know he's there, watching me. Yes, I'm pure evil. But I'm trying to make him jealous and get him to come to me on his own terms. I'm afraid of scaring him off. He can be so weird about things sometimes. He hasn't told anyone yet, like he's ashamed he might be gay or something. I was the one to tell Kairi. She was pissed he didn't tell her. I had to spend hours convincing her to say nothing.

"Kairi…" I start slowly with a sigh. This is a conversation we've had a million times before, I swear. It's her favorite subject. She's certain that I'm the one who should make the first move. "I'm letting him figure things out on his own."

"I know." She rolls her eyes. "You don't want to scare him off."

"Exactly."

"Don't you ever think that your actions now might be scaring him off?"

I smile knowingly and shake my head. "Not at all. He wouldn't be following me to work and acting like he wants to rip everyone around me apart."

She rolls her eyes again and pulls me aside. "Do you love him?" She whispers.

"Until lies become the truth." I say, quoting a particularly disgusting and sappy song that popped on the radio on my way here.

She looks confused and tilts her head. "Huh?"

"Yes, Kairi. He's the only one I'd give my heart to."

"Tell him that."

"I can't."

She pushes me against a row of lockers and raises her eyebrows. "Are you really that afraid of him, Riku? Do you really think he'll break your heart? After everything you two have been through… what he did to find you and what you did to help him and keep him safe along the way… do you really honestly think things will change if you admit it?"

Why does she have to be so damned perceptive? I really, really wish she wasn't. That is something I don't want her knowing. Seriously! It's like… just because I'm me, I can't have the tiniest doubt? True, I'm probably the last one to admit to weakness, but I'm as human and flawed as everyone else. I'm not perfect.

I cross my arms and lean back against the lockers. "Kairi… I will wait for him forever."

"But you don't have to wait." She's grabbing my arm and a couple kids gives us odd looks as they walk by. I so don't need this. Not now.

"His own terms, Kairi." I say prying her hand off and pushing her away playfully. "Now drop it, please! Someone might overhear, if they haven't already."

She crosses her arms and shakes her head. "You, Riku, are impossible."

"Yeah, I know. Now… go away."

She glares at me one last time before stomping off down the hall. "See you at lunch." She calls back to me and I smile.

"So you're after Sora…"

I know that voice. It's been a few years but I know that voice. And he's in the hall and he's clearly overheard at least part of my conversation with Kairi. I turn slightly, grab his arm, and pull him towards the boy's bathroom. It's usually empty this time in the morning, since class starts any minute. And as I thought, it is empty. "Axel… what are you doing here?"

He crosses his arms and smiles that cocky smile of his. I really have the urge to punch him. "Not happy to see me?"

Yeah, a really big urge. "Depends on why you're here." I step closer to him and my eyes narrow in a glare. "If you've come to mess with Sora again, I'll make you wish you couldn't be reborn." He better get the point. Because I'm not kidding. He lays a finger on Sora and I will kill him. And then I will wait for him to be reborn and kill him again.

He's smiling as he holds up his hands. "Easy there, princess. I'm not here for Sora. I came to see Roxas…"

"Stay away from him too." I snap, stepping closer and getting in his face. "Sora's gotten attached and he'd be devastated if something happened."

"Dude… you have me pegged all wrong." His face hardens a bit and pushes me. Not hard but enough to force me back. "I swear." He continues. "The Organization is dead. Well… we're alive, or as alive as we can be." He chuckles softly and I roll my eyes. I don't find his attempt at humor humorous. "But the Org itself is history. Just like Roxas, I left to have a life, not destroy others. Seriously! I was never good at being a bad guy."

That's an understatement. "No, you defiantly weren't." I roll my eyes and shake my head.

"I have no connection to the heartless anymore." He sounds sincere. "And I'm not here for Sora. He's all yours." He sounds really sincere.

"Don't say anything about that to anyone!" But I think I'll still keep an eye on him.

Axel smiles slyly and crosses his arms. "You play nice and I'll return the favor."

Nice? With him? I hardly know the guy. And my only grudge against him has to do with Sora. If he stays away, there will be no problem. "With you?"

"And Roxas."

Roxas? Okay… that catches me a bit off guard. Sure, when the blonde first showed up, I was a little suspicious. But almost instantly I realized the kid was harmless. Plus, like I said, Sora got really attached really quickly. So did his mother. One big, happy family. "I'm always nice to Roxas." Even I can hear the slight pout in my voice.

He puts his hand on his hip and smiles. "Keep it that way."

"Uh huh. Play nice and keep each other's secrets."

"Ah! He has a brain." He wraps an arm around my shoulders and ruffles my hair.

"Oh no! No touching my hair!" I push him away and turn to the mirror. Shit. He fucked it up.

"You're such a girl."

After running my hand through my hair a few times, I turn and smirk at him. "Oh yeah? Let me play with that mop of yours." I jump at him and he dodges me.

"My hair is off limits."

I laugh and push him slightly. I think I like him. Maybe, just maybe… we could be something that ordinary people might call friends. "So why are you here?"

He rolls his eyes and shakes his head. "I told you. I came to see Roxas."

I shake my head. "At the school, I mean."

"Work here." He says with a shrug.

"You? Work here?" Who the hell would hire a guy like him? Shit… he's not exactly a real person and all.

"Yeah."

Okay… the part about him not being real is probably a step too far. Of course he's real. Sort of at least. But still… "Shit… you're already in full on stalker mode."

He's laughing and smiling. "Believe me, he doesn't mind."

The tardy bell rings and I head for the door. Somehow, I can believe that. Despite my berating of Axel for messing with Roxas, I know he would honestly never hurt the kid. I know they're friends. Or something more that borders, or probably passes, the line between friends and inappropriate behavior between an adult and a teenager. Though which is which is up for debate.

I steal a sideways glance at Axel, who's walking beside me down the hall with his hands clasped behind his head. He looks like he's deep in thought about something. Or someone. "You know, he talks about you." I say slowly. "A lot."

He drops his arms and shrugs slightly. "We… he was my best friend before he left."

"Yeah… friend." There's a mocking tone to my voice as I say it. Because I know Roxas isn't simply a friend. Frankly, though, I couldn't care less about what the two nobodies do to each other as long as they leave Sora to me.

He inclines his head towards me and cocks an eyebrow. "How about I go find your spiky haired twit and scare him off?"

"Oh gee, look at the time." I say, pointing to my wrist. "Need to get to class."

"Maybe I'll see you later."

I wave Axel off as I duck into class. Man… won't Sora be surprised when I tell him Axel's on the island. As I recall, Sora rather liked the guy in the end and was upset when he thought Axel had died. Though I guess if Roxas knows… I'm sure Sora does too.

I slip into my seat and try to pay attention to whatever the teacher is yammering on about. But, once again for some reason, I'm distracted. I really wish Sora would just get over this stigma or whatever it is he has about being gay. Because despite Kairi's comments about this tiny, little, nagging fear I may have, I would still jump him the moment he gives me permission. I'd give him my heart, soul, body… everything if he asked me.

I've loved him forever. And that won't ever change.

Notes: Rather like this chapter I think. Hope you did too!