First, while I am laughing over it... 'That's like being the smartest kid with Down Syndrome!' Just saw Waiting... because I have been doing this OCD thing since X-Men Origins where I look for King (Ryan Reynolds) in movies...

Anyway, here is chappie five, Still Counting by Volbeat... go Norway!

By the way, I know there will be confusion at the end... Harry is still virgin! Keep that in mind! I dunno how he managed maybe I'll find a way to explain it and put it in the story. So, read on!

Wanted Dead or Alive

HP Yaoi

by:

Kiyoshi Michi

Still Counting

Lucius could feel his eye twitching slightly at the scene before him. Now, when Lucius returned from a rather tiring day of string pulling in the Ministry, he had hoped Harry would be around and maybe singing... or dancing. However, what he saw when he stepped from the fireplace had jealousy boiling deep in his veins.

Severus had Harry pushed to a wall, apparently snogging the hell out of the younger male.

Lucius waited for only a few moments before coughing to try and get their attention. However... that did not work... at all. The blonde glared at the back of his friend's head as he coughed a little louder to get them away from each other. Still, they continued on, blissfully unaware of the audience. Rolling his eyes, Lucius took a deep breath and leaned a little closer to Severus, not far from his ear.

"SEVERUS!"

The Potions Master literally jumped and turned to glare at Lucius, who only smirked smugly.

"What...is so important?"

"I thought you would like to know that I did manage to find a way that Harry could take over as Minister until he felt his plans had... come to fruition."

Harry beamed at Lucius over Severus' shoulder and reached his hands up to clap over his head. Severus glared while Lucius appeared awfully proud of himself. Feeling something deep within himself he had not felt in a long time, Severus simply decided to ignore Lucius and turned to Harry, intent on continuing the kiss until Harry raised a hand.

"What?"

"Just a question... what do you two think if I get a tongue piercing?"

Both men paused and simply stared at the younger man who gave them a questioning look.

"What?"

"Do it," they both answered in unison. Harry rubbed a hand over his face and sighed before laughing. "Really, what is with a male's obsession with their lover getting a tongue piercing?"

"I honestly haven't a clue."

Harry raised a brow at Severus, who was trying to act oddly innocent while Lucius laughed behind him.

"Uh huh..."

Harry looked up when he felt something, trying not to wake Severus as he moved around. With a quick kiss to Severus' head, Harry was up and out of the bed, shivering when cold air hit his legs. While a giant T-shirt was comfortable, Harry forgot how cold it could be at times. He shivered and rubbed his arms as he made his way to the door, pressing his hand against the door and pulled back with a gasp before he shouted with joy, likely waking Severus.

Harry threw open the door open and tackled the person on the other side, who squeaked - in a very manly way of course as this was Sirius.

"Holy hell, Sirius! What are you doing here! Not that I'm not happy to see you but still."

Sirius made a face before recognization dawned.

"Harry? Wow... you've changed so much. Ho... why the fuck is Snape mostly naked?"

"Because, mutt, I was not exactly expecting to be woken by Potter screeching like a little girl because his Godfather was here. Blame him, not me."

"Were you two...?"

Severus smirked at Sirius' expression, turning around without an answer. He could hear the man sputtering then berating Harry for losing his innocence to the creepy dungeon dwelling psychopath. That was a new one. Severus made himself comfortable on a chair, not bothering to get a shirt as he believed his pants to be enough in his own rooms. In a few minutes, after the Potions Master had gotten himself some tea, Harry led Sirius to a seat.

"Oh, Sev, did you make extra?"

"Of course not. You're a grown man."

Harry fixed Severus with a look, something akin to a pout but much more effective. Severus sighed.

"Fine you damned brat."

Harry smiled innocently as Severus stood to make more, far too tired to try any magic at the moment. While Severus was busy, Harry turned to Sirius who was making a face as he watched Severus walk off.

"Yes, we are together but no, I have not lost my 'innocence' yet. I am waiting."

"For what?"

"Lucius."

"... what?"

Severus came back and handed Harry a cup before taking a seat and pulling the younger male into his lap. To be entirely honest, Severus was only doing this because of how it irked Sirius to no end. This was his Godson, no matter how much older, in the lap of the enemy. Supposedly, of course. Only Severus and Sirius had yet to make amends.

"Potter here seems to have fallen in love with two men - Lucius and I. Draco told him about a triad and Potter, being the ever beloved Gryffindor he is, decided to rush headfirst into that decision and we are both having immense amounts of purely evil... fun... watching Lucius practically seethe over it. However, Potter has deemed it necessary to have Lucius be the first to say anything as he wants both of us and I agreed long ago."

Sirius stared blankly at Harry, who was curled up in Severus' lap and nursing the cup of tea with his mind only on that little cup at the moment. Said man rubbed a hand over his face and blew a few strands of stray hair from his face before he finally smiled at them.

"Ya know what... looking at Harry right now, I have to say I really don't mind this. But... uh... it wasn't Harry that pulled me here."

"It was your mate."

Both men looked to Harry as he continued to sip that tea as if he had said nothing. When the silence became almost stiffling, Harry looked up and blinked a few times. "What?"

"How did you know?"

"I have known who your mate is since practically the first day of the school year."

"Are... are you serious?"

"No, you are."

Severus groaned and tilted his head back while Sirius furrowed his brows, ignoring Harry's too innocent look. The younger male shrugged and finished off the tea before stretching with a yawn. Without looking, Severus responded knowing how the male could be. "Harry, go to bed. It is the middle of the night and you become irritable and unstable if you do not sleep." Severus held up a finger before Harry could protest. "I will be there shortly." With an exaggerated sigh, Harry reached up to kiss Severus' cheek before he got up and disappeared into the bedroom, leaving Sirius and Severus alone.

"What happened to him?"

"I believe that is something Potter must tell you himself. However, know that Lucius and I, and Draco as well, are loyal to him until the end."

"Does this have anything to do with the puppet thing?"

"Damn it! First, do not mention that around Potter. I have never been so afraid of his wrath as when he thought I left those bodies in the room. Second, how do you know about that?"

"Well... stuff like that doesn't stay quiet long. Did you really have a premonition?"

Severus sighed and ran a hand over his face. He certainly did that quite often anymore. "Yes, I did. The one I gave the public is slightly different than the one I had before. By the way..." Sirius glared at Severus' smirk. "I know who your mate is as well and let me just say... I wish you the best of luck. You are going to need it."

"...why?"

"High-maintenance."

"Oh shit."

Draco stared uninterestedly at his hands, nails manicured to what he considered perfection. For some reason, Leonius - though now known as Harry - was laughing every time he and Draco locked eyes. So, Draco had stopped looking up. As it was, he was chewing on the end of a quill, feeling oddly restless.

There was something stirring in Draco and he could not figure out what. It was two conflicting feelings - giddiness and terror - that from what he could tell, had nothing to do with each other. It was then the trap door was slammed open and everyone jumped, including Harry who fell off his desk.

"Hey, Leo, ya in here?"

Draco blinked a few times. Was that Sirius Black? The blonde could not help but stare - the man had a rugged handsomeness about him that Draco could not believe he did not see before. He snapped out of it when he realized Harry was smirking at him and turned back around.

"Ugh... of course I am in here... teaching. Because you know... it's my job. You'd know that if you had one."

"What the... I hate you."

"No you don't."

"ARGH! Fine, whatever! We gotta talk."

"Alright. My rooms are back here. Draco... you're in charge."

The blonde let a smug smirk tug at his lips, leaning back in the seat he had been allowed to change. However, he blinked when Sirius, who had started to walk by, stopped abruptly near Draco. He could hear the older male taking deep breaths, sniffing the air, and Draco was confused until he remembered something Harry told him not too long ago.

Sirius' Animagus was a Grim.

"Oh SHIT!"

Harry leaned back out the door to stare at Draco as he blushed brightly after his outburst. Harry gave him that all-knowing smirk as Sirius slowly made his way around Draco and disappeared with the blonde's friend into the private rooms.

Draco was left there to brood over his discovery but could not bring himself to hate Harry for not telling him.

Sirius had been sniffing around the castle at night for days now. His padded feet hardly made a sound on the floor and he blended well with the shadows with his dark coat. There had been an intoxicating smell and he had been trying to follow it for days, but had been doing so in vain as he never got any closer to the source.

However, maybe he should have paid more attention.

He had been sniffing along the ground, trying to track the smell, and did not realize he had come to feet and was sniffing up someone's leg until he heard a stiffled laugh. Stiffening as he had been caught, Sirius managed to peek up and recognized the face of one Draco Malfoy. After looking around, Sirius deemed it safe to just sit there in front of the blonde who stared in surprise.

"Uh... you realize I know who you are, right?"

Oh, that certainly made things easier. With barely a thought, Sirius shifted back into his natural form, still sitting casually on the floor with a playful smirk.

"I suppose Harry has been spilling secrets again, hmm?"

"Pretty much."

"Gotcha. Anyway, why were you laughing?"

"Um... you were tickling me."

Sirius paused, a strange look on his face that Draco could not decipher. The blonde started to worry when a mischeivous smirk took place of the look. Draco barely had time to think, let alone move, when Sirius suddenly lunged at him and pinned him to the floor. The blonde tried so desperately, but could not keep in his peals of laughter as the older male attacked his sides with his fingers.

"Black, what the hell are you doing with my Godson?"

Draco tilted his head back to see Severus standing there with an exasperated expression, like he expected this.

"Well... I just found out your Godson is ticklish."

"So you attack him?"

"No. I pinned him against his will to the floor to then torture him."

"That sounds oddly like an attack."

"Says you."

"... really Black? I have to say I am astounded at the leaps and bounds you have come in maturity. It does not suit you. In fact, I am a little terrified."

"Oh shut up. It's not like I raped him."

There was an awkward silence in which Severus only raised a brow and Draco flushed a bright red at the implications. Sirius laughed as Severus slowly started to smirk and pointed at Draco. "If you look at him, I highly doubt it will be rape. You have to be unwilling for that to happen."

Leaving a sputtering Draco and confused Sirius, Severus walked off to return to Harry, who had been strangely sick lately.

So, there it is... we will, soon, be getting to the 'I am the Dark Lord, bow to me!' part