Sorry it took so long guys... I'm lazy, but extraordinarily busy! Thanks for reading :D

For a second, all I could do was stare at the egotistical boy pinning me against the car, any possible words gone from my brain completely. Then, as if I were waking up from a weird dream, I started shoving at him, trying desperately to push him off of me before someone noticed me pressed up against Alfred's Mustang. But just as I thought Gilbert was going to move, out of the corner of my eye I saw that my brother was racing up to me. Helplessly, I released my hold on the clothes of my "attacker" and tried to make my position look as natural as possible. But the first words out of Alfred's mouth made me realize that I'd failed at my attempt at nonchalance.

"Dude, what are you doing to my car?"

Gilbert snickered as I hurriedly tried to come up with a sane reason for being in that position. "U-uh… s-stretching?" It came out of my mouth as a question, and I mentally smacked myself for the uncertainty.

Alfred's eyebrows furrowed, whether in disbelief or concern, I couldn't really tell, but he said, "You're really acting weird today. Maybe we should, like, go home now or something. I mean, it's really crazy scary!"

I threw an involuntary glance at Gilbert, who hadn't moved a muscle and was still pinning me, and told him, a little breathless, "Yeah, maybe we should."

He made a noise of displeasure and whined, "Aw, but we just got here and everything!"

Feeling sympathy, I decided that I would be a good person, even if it meant having to put up with… 5MetersofAwesomesauce. "I can just wait in the car if you give me the keys."

His eyes lit up again and he tossed me the keys, saying, "Thanks dude! I was worried about losing those anyway! Try not to drive off in my car though, kay?"

The he raced off, not giving me a chance to answer him, even if I had wanted to. Keys in one hand, I tried to push Gilbert away again, still unsuccessful. "Please," I begged, wishing I was at home. "Please let go of me."

He seemed to consider it before he finally pulled back, giving me room to slide into the car and turn it on, heaters on full blast. Then I pulled myself over to the passenger seat and huddled down in my jacket, closing my eyes and telling myself none of this was really happening and that it was all just an awful dream. When I opened my eyes, I would be at home in my bed, and there would be no Gilbert or skate park or ghosts that only I could see. I would just be warm and comfy, maybe even with a cup of maple coffee sitting on my nightstand, with chocolate and whipped cream on the top. I sighed gently with contentment at the thought, even risked a peek out of one eye.

I was met with a dark red, strong gaze and cocky smile. So it really had happened. He was a ghost, one only I could see, and my brother had dragged me to a skate park when it was freezing and snowy. There was no coffee. And Gilbert could get into my dreams. I pulled my knees up to my chest, feeling like crying again, and looked out the window drearily. I didn't want to be involved with him at all, much less have his babies. He knew as well as I did that two boys couldn't have babies.

"Hey," Gilbert's rough voice cut into the silence.

I turned back to him but said nothing.

"Let's steal the car!" he suggested, sitting in the driver's seat and twisting the keys to start the car.

My eyes went impossibly wide and my heart started pounding heavily as he started to back out. "Gilbert!" I cried in shock, moving to try and stop him. "Don't!"

He gave a short laugh and asked, "Why not? Let's just take it for a little spin! Go to Starbuck's and get some coffee to warm you up!"

Frantic, I told him, "Gilbert, you can't drive the car! You're dead! No one can see you!"

"The awesome me doesn't need to be alive to drive this car!" he replied.

I really didn't want to do this to him, but it was the only thing I could think to say to stop him from leaving. "You died driving a car, Gilbert! Do you want to kill me too?"

Just as I had hoped, this caused him to slam down on the breaks, just in time to not end up on the actual road. I hated how offended he looked, how hurt he seemed, but I exhaled heavily, relieved that I had figured out how to make him stop. I could already see Alfred's face from where we were as he watched "me" drive off with his car, the one he had just specifically told me not to steal. That and I didn't have my license, so it would be illegal for me to drive any car. Quieter than usual, Gilbert backed up, back to the spot where it had been parked earlier. The minute we were back, Alfred, flanked by his two friends, threw open the driver's door, and, finding me on the complete other side of the car, took a shocked step backwards.

I had no choice… I had to pretend like I had done it. They wouldn't believe me if I told them Gilbert was a ghost, just have me admitted into the nearest mental ward. I tried to make my expression guilty instead of terrified. Judging by the way the three boys were looking at me, I hadn't succeeded in that. For a long moment, nobody could say anything. We just stared at each other, our faces masks of shock.

"Uhhh…" I finally said. "Sorry."

That probably would have convinced them it was me if Gilbert hadn't chosen that exact moment to slam the car door shut, his normal smile in place. Like he was trying to play with their minds, he kept opening and closing it repeatedly. Next, he started playing with the windshield wipers and the radio volume, not to mention lowering and raising the heat and pressing the car horn. Then, just as if the car had had a mental breakdown, he stopped everything at once and sat still, giving me a bad boy smile and settling in to watch the show play out before him.

"Dude, my car is like Herbie the Love Bug!" Alfred shouted in excitement. "High five!"

Him and his Spanish friend, Toni, slapped hands with big, goofy grins stretching across their faces. "Now if only it made hot chocolate…" he added, looking at the Mustang curiously, like he expected it to.

Gilbert scoffed at them and turned to me, saying, "They have no idea! But what if the awesome me does this?" He reached out toward the radio, which he had turned on earlier, and all of a sudden, it became static instead of music, startling us all. His eyes bright with amusement, he leaned toward it and breathed, "The awesome me will have your souls!"

It was a little unclear playing out on the radio, full of crackling, but it was quite obvious that the message had come through loud and clear. The three of them froze. Alfred gave an awkward laugh of terror, looking mortified.

Francis, having been quiet this whole time, mumbled, "That was G-Gilbert, non?"

Toni looked puzzled, his phone in his hand, like he was ready to call for help if he needed it. "S-Si…"

"So… I'll see you guys later!" Alfred said, his voice higher than usual. He threw his board into the car and sat down quickly, not realizing that at the moment he was right inside of Gilbert's body. With a shiver, he waved good-bye to his friends and took off, refusing to make eye contact with me.

In fact, he didn't say anything to me until we were back inside the house and he had pulled me into his room. I'd never seen him look so pale, his eyes like bright sapphires in contrast. I tried to stay near the doorway, ready to bolt whenever I possibly could. Anxiously, Alfred started pacing in front of me before he finally spoke frantically.

"Mattie, did you really try to take my car?"

I watched Gilbert, who had gone to lie lazily down on my brother's bed, finding out what it was I could say and what I couldn't. When he waved his hand, I took it as a go ahead. "No."

He paled further, if it was even possible, and sat down, again unaware that he was next to the ghost of his former friend. "C-cool. See ya later!" he said cheerfully, though I could tell he was about to have a freak out, one that most likely involved him crying for his Mommy shrilly and clutching pillows.

I left before he could start and practically ran for my room, relief filling me when I was again surrounded by the familiarity of everything I owned. I had almost forgotten about Gilbert when he spoke again, causing me to jump and whirl around to face him, my heart pounding from surprise.

"You know, once upon a time you and the awesome me were married."

He sounded less cheery than usual, his enthusiastic attitude replaced with a more somber tone. I thought he was trying to trick me again, mess with me in some way, so I ignored him, getting on the computer to see who was on the IMing site. After waiting for it to load, it came up. Nobody was. With a grievous sigh, I spun around in my wheeled chair to face Gilbert again, deciding to let him entertain me with his… tales. "What do you mean?" I asked, prompting him.

"A really long time ago, you were a maple-coated, yummy Canadian princess. I was a sexy, beastial dragon tamer prince from a foreign country, one known as Prussia. Your name was Maddie Williams the Beautiful. I was quite obviously still Gilbert the Great Supreme Overlord of all the Awesome Places and People in the World! One day, you were traveling to my awesome country, and the awesome me to yours. We met along the way and I saw your beautiful big blue eyes, silky hair, pretty dress, and big boobies and fell in love. You saw my sexy outfit, perfect hair, superspecialawesome Gilbird, magnificent rapier, and big dick and fell in love. So we got married, had sex, made some little Gil babies, had some more sex, had some Mattie babies, and lived happily ever after in our new country, which we declared PruCan!"

I felt my face heat up for some reason at his ridiculous tale of our "past". Was this his way of telling he loved me? Trying not to dwell too much on the big boobies and dick comments, I spun away from him and opened up Microsoft Word. Without turning back I asked him, "Can you write down what really happened?"

He laughed, right in my ear, and said, "No, the awesome me is too lazy for that! But I can show you instead!"

The world went black.