Chapter Two
"These are the reflections of the first days; but when the lapse of time proves the reality of evil, then the actual bitterness of grief commences." 'Frankenstein' by Mary Shelley
or
Solicitude – the state of being anxiety or concern, causes for care, an attitude expressing excessive attentiveness; worry, care, unease, disquietude, apprehension.
The teleprompter scrolled as the sounds were heard. Laughter, "What was that," and then screams that became muffled as the audio feed cut out. "That was the last radio transmission for a helicopter taking burn patients from Port Charles to New York City two days ago. The authorities are continuing to search… But after the crash with no food and water for days now the likelihood of finding any survivors are dwindling," spoke the talking head.
Dante threw the remote at the face speaking of his wife and mother. Everywhere he looked he saw reminders of how empty his apartment was when she was supposed to be with him. There were pictures around the loft with her face, the gifts that were saved from their reception and purchased after in condolence of the disaster, and his mother's cooking clogging up their fridge. What was left over her burnt and torn wedding dress was still hanging on the bathroom door, and the shards of his tux were left in the bag of personal belongings from the hospital. A knot pulled at this throat.
"Mr. Spencer, what can I do for you?" the nurse asked politely.
"I'm here to see the newest member of my family. Which is Dante Falconeri's room?" He was astute.
"Mr. Falconeri has managed to take off against medical advice after having a major organ transplant. Here I was thinking you helped him escape."
"I don't know why you'd think that, Epiphany," his attempt at being aloof didn't suit him and in response she scoffed. "Seriously, things are hard enough on my daughter right now without her husband going and dying on her when she ain't even here."
"Well, if you happen to see your new son-in-law can you drag him back here. He's putting himself at risk for infection…"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got it." He tried to blow her off and was startled by a tap on the shoulder.
"Hello, sir. I'm…" And Luke didn't hear his name through the sounds of his blood boiling. "from Channel 8 news. I understand you're the father of one of the victims. Care to make a statement about the loss of your daughter?"
"I haven't lost my daughter!" he yelled and his hands grabbed for the camera. He took the video recorder from the man and threw it across the room where it splattered on the wall. It left behind a sizeable indention and mark where pieces scattered to lay across before it.
"Mr. Spencer!" He could hear the nurse yell.
"Why don't you stop being so useless and help!" he raved.
"I am trying to help. Their story needs to be told. They deserve that."
"No! They deserve to be found! They're out there. So how about instead of wasting space in the hospital you go join the volunteer search party rather than looking for a stupid story!"
Every time a new person entered the room there was less air. She was beginning to believe that they thought being surrounded by a bunch of people would make her forget that her body was deformed and her mother wasn't there to help her through it. First it started with her sisters just being there, then her brothers, and Nikolas showed up with Spencer and Emma, and Carly came in to check on her. There wasn't even enough space for everyone to sit so they crowded around her bed. It was like suffocating.
Each pair of eyes would drill into Kristina's skin and their mouths would open like they wanted to speak. Apologize weren't going to heal her scars or bring her mother back. So the kids played on the floor and the door opened and closed. The only consistent noise was the sound of Molly sobbing into Sam's arms.
The door opened again. She let out a deep breath when she saw it was her doctor and not another person coming and never going. "I hope they treated you well at Mercy?" Robin asked. "I'm glad they transferred you promptly. Your first skin graft will be later this evening." The way she spoke was all business. She didn't even acknowledge her child who was looking up at her from her place on the floor with open arms.
"Have you heard any news about the crash?" Her friend who had taken charge of watching her daughter spoke up. Nikolas reached down and pulled his son into his lap while images of sister crossed his mind.
"There is no news to get. They crashed. They've had no food and water, and with the heat outside if the crash didn't kill them the dehydration did." She didn't look up from the medical chart as she spoke so she missed the astonished faces gawking at her. "Kristina, a nurse will be in here to prep you in a few hours. Let us know if you need anything." She swiftly turned around and bolted out the door completely unaware of a person following her until she was completely pulled back by her shoulder.
"What the hell were you thinking!" screeched the person who was arguably the last person Robin needed to see. "Sam, Molly, Kristina just lost their mother! Kristina has wounds that will never be healed and no matter how beautiful we thinks she is she'll never look or feel the same. Nikolas just lost his only remotely sane relative, and now he's worried that he'll never see his sister again. Why on Earth would you say something so awful to them?"
"Because it's true, Carly. There's no point in lying."
"I understand that everything that has been going on since the wedding reception must have been very hard on you, and now you're mourning for your husband. That doesn't excuse anything. If you're going to just give up on Patrick then you don't deserve him or Emma. She certainly deserves better from her mother when her father isn't even here. You really just stood there and said in front of your child that her father is dead."
"This is so useless," said one man.
"I've forgotten why we're even here," remarked another.
"Maybe it's not the search that's useless," Sonny said. He was the one man who showed up to the search site wearing an all black suit. Like every other person who had showed up he was covered in sweat and dirt. "Maybe it's the people doing it."
"Agreed, my friend," Luke climbed the scaling hill next to him. "I've called in a few favors though."
"All you favors," his youngest son corrected him. Ethan had been trailing behind father the best he could.
"Right. There are a couple of dozen guys on their way, and these dumb bastards can hightail it home."
"I've got every one of my men here. They'll search tirelessly without complaint. We'll find them."
"Do you really think that?" asked Ethan.
"Are you already giving up on your sister, Dodge?"
"Of course, I don't want to give up on Lulu. They say that if you don't find someone after the first 24 hours that it gets less and less likely…"
"They say a lot of things. Didn't they once say there was Pluto was a planet…and now it's a star or a moon…or something other than a planet."
"The world was flat," Sonny contributed.
"How does this apply to Lulu?"
"The fact is that anyone can be wrong, and those idiots on TV are wrong to. We'll find your sister. She can survive anything."
"Already has," his friend chimed in again.
"Exactly. So we'll find her and we'll bring her home. Plus, her wedding reception was ruined by an explosion so it's almost as if the universe owes her one."
Carly waltzed in the room carefully closing the door behind her. "I got your text. What's wrong? Are you worried about the skin graft?" She hadn't meant to hit a nerve, but Kristina still flinched.
"No, we're worried about Sam," answered the youngest sister. "We don't think she's coping."
"Where's Sam now?"
"We told her you were coming back to visit so she went to go get you a coffee."
Carly's eyes widened. "She went to get me a coffee? Are you sure? Maybe she was getting herself a coffee?"
"No. It's for you. She's been doing it since the transfer," Kristina told her. "She's been running around trying not to be here for too long. Getting Molly a blanket, getting us food, taking Emma to get her diaper changed, walking Nikolas out, and constantly getting us water. She hardly sits down."
"And she won't talk about Mom," Molly piped up. Her voice began to trail off when she continued, "or Jason."
The older woman took a sharp inhale. "Sam… There's a lot going on for her right now. For all of you, and now that you're mom isn't here, its Sam's job to take care of you. It's not like your father's are going to become more active participants in your lives… Sam's what you have. She knows that, and that is a lot for a person to take on by themselves on top of mourning your mother and worrying about Jason."
"What if Jason doesn't come back? Will she always be his way?" A question from one young sister was followed by the other.
"Jason is coming back! He'll come back and Sam won't be on her own. Neither will you guys. There is a ton of family who loves you and will always be there for you. That includes me, so if you ever need anything at all call me. Until then, you're just going to have to let Sam… do what she's doing."
Robin didn't say anything as she did her best not to just drop her daughter in her bed. Luckily playing around the hospital had worn her out or else it could be reliving a traumatic time for them both. She wasn't actively trying to not care about her daughter or anything else. Her body just caved into a natural numbness that she embraced with open arms.
There were moments when everything would subside and she'd remember and feel against her will. The look on her husband's face the last time he saw her, the way he was numb, and she could read his guilt and hatred across his face. He had pulled the plug on his own brother, who he believed he failed long before that. The worst part was she had been there for him the entire time when he'd let her. She stood next to him as he took the life support off his brother and watched with him as Matt took his last breath. Forever in his mind and his heart that memory would burn on his soul and he'd always associate it with her.
When they went to say goodbye before the helicopter took off he wouldn't say much, but she insisted that she walk him up to the roof anyway. Other people got hugs and kisses. She had watched Lulu get the most loving farewell from her husband, but Patrick couldn't manage more than a single glace before stepping out of her line of sight for what could be forever. She doubted he cared if he saw her again, and if he was alive somewhere else he was probably happier without her face as a reminder.
She stomped her way through their empty house and made her way to the kitchen. The dishes from their breakfast the day of the wedding were still sitting in the sink. Possibly the last thing her husband touched. She almost let herself believe it could possibly be the last thing in her life her husband would ever touch again.
She pulled a glass from the cupboard and a bottle from the top of the fringe. She listened herself pour a caramel colored and unforgiving liquid into the bottom of the cup. It only took a beat before the glass hit her lips and she forced a large and hard swallow.
Sam walked as if her body was being weighted to the ground. Her legs buried farther and deeper into sand with every step she could. Throughout the day her tunnel vision kept her going from one place to the next and her fervor to get where she needed to go kept her from running on empty. The ending of the day, the hospital's visiting hours, brought the ghosts back to her, and her stolen supply of energy was spent.
It very well could have been attributed to that place if she let herself think about it hard enough. This hospital was where her baby was born and had died at the same time. Her brother, the only person she cared about for most of her life, got sick and died in this place. Both of which she blamed on her mother, the stranger that managed to benefit from all the disaster in her life. She couldn't count the amount of times she had been a patient herself. Alexis had been there for her the last few times, and now the hospital had taken her too. As it stood the hospital was the last place Jason had been seen. He and the other people going to get their burns treated were herded off to the roof and then they all disappeared. Jason and some of her friend potentially gone forever like the hospital had opened up its mouth and swallowed them whole.
Her eyelids were heavy and falling even as she walked. If it were possible she would have given anything to have them decide one way or another. Keep them open to shield away all her nightmares or stay closed and let her fall into a deep coma until it was all over. Something made her feel that things didn't work that way, and she would have to force her them open herself just to make it to the elevator.
A montage of people separated her and her escape rout. It could have been all in her head, but she could have sworn it was like everyone was hugging. Her friend completely attached to her adopted father who narrowly escaped death. That friend's boss sitting in the lap of a man who was so wrong for her that they made a perfect couple, and then her friend or ex huddled with his son's in the most comforting compassionate embrace she didn't even know he was capable of.
The relief and love stabbed at her hollow gut. Her legs that were once weighed down by invisible blocks made a sprint for the nearest door. Her back fell against it once the door slammed shut and she started grabbing at her chest. Sob by sob few out of her throat and her lungs searched for air.
Bodies shuffled in. They clogged the door, barricaded the top of the stairs, and in spite of the fact that there were chairs available there was no room for anybody to sit down. It was unconventional to say the least when usually a press conference would be called and aired at nauseum, but with so many loved one's in peril the families owed a face to face. The small yet well known diner was the center of town and the perfect place to unleash the news.
"What the hell did you call us all here for, Lucky?" screamed a nameless man in the crowd of many.
"We're wasting time. We could be out there looking," yelled another.
"Actually, the reason I wanted all the volunteers and all the families here is…" he cleared his throat. "Search and Rescue has banned volunteers from any on-going searches. The areas left to search are deemed to dangerous and for them to have to worry about your safety could compromise them doing their job. The fact that you're willing to sacrifice your time and put all your effort into looking for our loved ones is very much appreciated, but right now you can only hinder any progress they can make." The mob of people let out various cries of disapproval. "I understand. I want all of you out there looking for my sister, but... not if it… There's another thing…" He squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath. Against his will tears escaped him under the multitude of eyes facing him. "They no longer expect to find any…survivors. They're not calling this a… um… body recovery… mission."
Author's Note:
This chapter was based loosely off of episodes 4216, 4217, 4218, and 4219 of Home and Away. They can be found on YouTube, and they should be watched...because it's awesome.
I absolutely love reading everything you guys are saying about the story...and not just because it's positive. Your comments are the most important part of my experiment, and I'm thinking this may not be my last experiment. I hope you guys continue to like the story, and please keep leaving feedback.