A/N:Holy crap I'm so dead tired after writing this…Few so glad I got it down at…Two in the morning! *passes out*

Okay so first things first Ichi's ring tone I fucking love that song, its called Ignition by Tobymac, hee hee get it ignition, Ichi's a car junkie? I thought it fit well lol and if your interested go to YouTube they have a pretty sick Bleach AMV that goes along with the song it's called Bleach AMV – Ignition V2 =3 It's probably one of my fav AMV's! Go watch it now! Go now before you even read this do it and tell me if you like it or else *shakes fist* lmao

Please Review or I'll sick an angry Grimmy on you =D

Warnings: A little bit of Grimm/Ichi… Nothing to big but none the less boyXboy lol

It was probably the third time I had pulled out my phone to check the time, five minuets. It had been five minuets since I had gotten to Shiro's and stood at his door trying to find the damn courage to knock on it. I had no fucking idea what was going to happen or what was going to be said all I knew was that I felt like my stomach was doing back flips and I felt nauseous as hell.

'Fuck Grimmjow since when where you such a fucking pussy just fucking walk in already! Fuck since when did you knock for fuck sakes?'My inner voice screamed at me and I couldn't help but cringe. It was right but still it didn't help the screeching bats that flew around my stomach. Fuck I wanted to punch those damn bats in the face.

I finally shook my head of such stupid thoughts, took a deep breath and opened the door. My eye's flicked over to where Shiro and Ichigo sat on the couch, both not saying a word and neither of them where looking at each other. Oh fuck, what the hell's going on?

"Hey."I announced gruffly as I walked in, kicking my boots off before I hung my coat up on the rack along with Shiro's. Just before I left it had started raining, is someone trying to tell me something? Fuckin eh.

"Hey Grimmjow."Ichigo greeted me with a soft smile that had my heart soaring but Shiro on the other hand didn't even budge or move to acknowledge me, oh just fucking great.

"Yo whitey, what's up?"I announced as I nudged his shoulder before I took a seat on the other couch. I watched as his eye's flickered over to me and he gave me a quick nod and then got up and went into the kitchen. I sat staring at his retreating form with slight anger. Okay this bastard was the one who had lied to Ichigo to keep him from me, I should be the one pissed which I was of course but I was keeping my anger pulled down for the sake of Ichigo and here this fucker is giving me the cold shoulder? Ya fuck no!

"What th-"Before I could even finish my sentence though he had come back with three beers in his hands.

"Ya I know we could all use somethin stronger but dis is all I got, surprisin I know."He explained as he handed us each a beer and took his seat once more. I watched as Ichigo practically chugged his back along with Shiro following not far behind and I sat and stared down at my beer, okay I was missing something I had to have been.

"What the fuck is going on?"I asked and I watched both of them stop mid chug and look at each other, okay at this point I was ready to fucking toss the damn beer at both of them, this was wearing very thin on my nerves.

"Do you wanna or should I?"Ichigo asked as he raked a shaky hand through his hair and I watched as Shiro let out a large sigh before shaking his head.

"Okay I don't care who the fuck tells me but one of ya better start talkin or else I'm about to get really pissed off."I announced and I heard Shiro snort.

"Yer about ta get really pissed of either way man."Shiro announced and I just started at him in confusion until Ichigo finally spoke up.

"Grimmjow….Things have gotten really, really fucking complicated and in any other case I wouldn't really feel the need to tell this to you because well…It's personal and between me and Shiro but now that I know your feelings I believe you deserve to know considering your now involved."Ichigo explained and I felt my hand clench around my beer bottle as I listened to his words, something that involves him and Shrio eh? Geez let me fuckin guess.

"You've been fuckin each other?"I asked with a raised brow and I watched as both Shiro and Ichigo's heads shot up with wide shocked eyes.

"H-How did you?"Ichigo stuttered out and I waved him off with my hand.

"Just a guess."I lied, well half lied I really had no solid proof but it was pretty fuckin obvious.

"Well here's a question for ya, how long?"I asked and I watched as Shiro quickly looked away and I watched as Ichigo bit his lip.

"It started back in second year of high school, I had figured I needed to confirm my feelings and Shiro….It had first started out as fuck buddies and then-"My anger had snapped like a brittle twig and I couldn't even let Ichigo finish his explanation. I already had Shiro in my grasp as Ichigo's words came to a dead halt and my fist connected with his face.

"You son of a bitch I trusted you! You knew how much I liked him, for years you knew and yet you go and do that shit!"I screamed out as my fist came down once again into his mouth.

"Not only that but you lied to him to keep him away from me so I didn't have a chance, what the fuck is wrong with you?"I growled out but before my fist could come down once again Ichigo grabbed my arm to stall it.

"Grimmjow stop! He has his reason's, they may not be the best and what he has done might have been wrong but you need to listen to why before you go beating the shit out of your best friend!"He shouted and I found myself loosening my grip on his shirt. Now that I thought about it Shiro wasn't even trying to fight back, what the fuck?

Ichigo quickly pulled me off of him and sat me back down on the couch. My murdering gaze was still fixed on Shiro until I felt soft warm hands cup my face and pull so I was looking at him. I felt like I was going to melt into those chocolate brown orbs as my heart picked up when his thumb ran down my cheek.

"Please as much as you're hurt, please listen to him first before you make any rash decisions that you'll regret later."He asked softly and all I could do was nod. His eyes looked so sad and confused and it made me want to reach out and comfort him so bad but before I could the warmth of his hands disappeared and he was back sitting next to Shiro. Those warm hands where now on my best friend checking to make sure he was alright and I felt the brutal jealousy rage within me and it took all my strength to push it down. That is until I saw his eyes flicker up to Ichi's and the smile that pulled at his lips allowing his true feelings to poor on through, oh you have got to be fucking kidding me.

"Shiro."My voice was threatening and I watched as Ichigo quickly pulled away from checking his left eye and sat back down.

"I'm gonna give you to the count of six to start explaining, I don't think I have to tell you what's gonna happen if you don't." I watched as Shiro's eyes went wide as I began to count down. Not one of my friends ever took that threat any way but seriously, they new the moment I started counting down if I got to six they better hope they can run fast. Of course by the time I got to five he was sputtering out a reply.

"F-Fuck o-okay!"I watched as Shiro took a deep breath before he continued.

About fifteen minuets later of sitting and listening to Shiro go on about his feelings for Ichigo and how by time he had wanted to tell us both he had dug him self in so deep that he was to scared to get out, I was ready to throw myself out the nearest window. I felt so sick to my stomach and so pissed off that I didn't know what to do with myself, not to mention Ichigo hadn't said a single word since he started and refused to look at me, well isn't this about as fun as shootin your self in the face!

"I'm so fuckin sorry man, I never meant for this to happen."Those words right there snapped me out of my daze.

"Are you fucking kidding me right now? Of course you meant for this to happen! You had fucking planned for it to happen for god sakes, don't go backing out of your great master plan now Shiro, fuck the only reason why where sitting here right now is because you got caught!"I shouted as I banged my fist into the couch.

"I know that! What I meant was I never meant fer ya or Ichi ta get hurt! I never wanted ta lose ya as a friend!"He screamed back at me and I watched as Ichigo finally moved to look at Shiro.

"Then why'd ya do it man? Why risk our fuckin friendship!"I asked calmly but I already knew the answer before he even said it.

"If our positions where reversed don't tell me ya wouldn't have done tha same thing….Maybe differently but not to far off."I let out a long hard sigh as I scrubbed my hands over my face, for the love of fucking god this had gone from complicated to just fucked in a matter of days.

* So don't blink if you wanna come cross the border, Take a look around or come test the water, We won't stop 'till we see the morning, So welcome to the quiet before the storm hits…Turn on, turn on the ignition, Everybody, Come on, come on and turn on the ignition*

Both me and Shiro turned to Ichigo as his phone went off, we watched as he cursed and he grabbed for his phone and checking the caller ID before answering it.

"Tosh?" My mind reeled as I heard the name come from the strawberry, Tosh, Tosh, why the fuck did that name sound so familiar but I couldn't fucking put a face to it.

"Holy shit man you serious! Fuck dude I'm sorry but….Now's not really a good time, I'm kinda dealin-"I watched as Ichigo pulled the phone away from his ear as the guy on the other end fumed.

"I don't care what kind of shit your dealing with Kurosaki you get your fat ass down here now!"A deep voice called out as he commanded the strawberry to do as he was told. Damn guy sounded pushy as hell and I noticed how Shiro chuckled at the guys tone.

"Yo I'll get there when I can, like I tried to tell you before I'm dealing with some stuff…I never said I wouldn't get there sometime, fuck it's not like your going any where now right?" I watched as Ichigo rolled his eyes but I'm assuming the man agreed because with that he said a swift, cya, and hung up.

"Who the fuck was that?"I asked and I watched as Ichigo put the phone back into his pocket and then brought his hand up to rub the back of his neck.

"That was my friend Toshiro, he used to go to our school but he left last year to go over seas and now he's back and he was just callin to get me to come over to Renji's."Ichigo explained as he picked up his empty beer bottle to throw it in the recycling. Ya I know out of all the fuckin people that recycled, Shiro was the last one on my list that I thought would ever do that shit. I actually laughed at him when he explained he was just doin his part to help the environment, ahh good times.

"Well why don't you go?"I asked and I watched as he flicked a confused gaze at me.

"Umm….Hello…"He said as he waved his arm around the room to explain himself and I just shrugged my shoulders and stood letting myself have a good stretch.

"Right now…I don't really have anything to say….Or rather I don't really know what ta say so I'm just gonna go home eat, drink and go to sleep and then in the morning go to the gym to pound out some of my anger and then maybe we can talk more."I announced as I began to place my boots back on and when I did I turned to see both Ichigo and Shiro standing and nodding, not that I thought they would disagree with me.

"Then….We'll all talk more later?"Ichigo asked as he scrunched his work shirt in his hands and I watched as Shiro nodded, not being able to reach my gaze. I quickly pulled on my leather jacket and opened the door and waited for Ichigo to walk out before I did the same.

"I'll text you tomorrow Shiro."And with that I closed the door not allowing either Ichigo or Shiro to say anymore. As I turned and looked at Ichigo I noticed he was biting his lip and had his head bent down well he fiddled with that damn shirt. I quickly grabbed his arm and pulled him over to the elevators and pressed for them to come. Thankfully they where there within a second and we both hopped in.

It was a silent trip down to the first floor and I couldn't help but be reminded of the car ride that we had today. As we both stepped off of the elevator Ichigo cursed as he finally realized how heavy the rain really was. I let out along sigh as I craned my neck back.

"Why the fuck out of all the days does it have to rain like this when I have my motorcycle."I cursed as I began the short walk to the double doors that lead to our doom with Ichigo quickly following step. We both walked the short distance to our vehicles not bothering to run because the rain was that hard. By the time we got there we where both drenched and I watched as Ichigo turned to me, dripping wet. His shirt was now a second skin as where his pants well his spiky hair now laid hanging over his black head band, dear sweet baby Jesus.

"Do you want a ride? I mean I know where already drenched and you probably don't want to deal with me right now but it's dangerous to ride your bike in this kind of weather, it'll be fine if you leave it here for the night, I've done it before with my car."Ichigo announced over the hard rain and all I could do was eye his lips, watching the water trickle down from his eye lashes to the tip of his nose and then to those sexy lips. The lips I had been dieing to kiss the moment I met him, the lips that Shiro had kissed at least a thousand times. Suddenly a burst of jealousy raked through my body at the thought of how Shiro had stolen Ichigo's first kiss, well his first gay one any way not to mention his virginity. I could have had all that if it wasn't for him.

"G-Grimmjow?"He stuttered out and I watched as a soft blush lit up his cheeks and I couldn't help myself. Within a second I had him pinned against his car with my hands on either side of him as he watched me with wide eyes.

"Gr-Grimmjow what are you-"

"You have feelings for me right? You said it your self that you've had feelings for me the moment you laid eyes on me."I announced and I saw him nod his head almost sheepishly and I swallowed the thick thump in my throat.

"Then I deserve a kiss, I deserve at least one consider all the shit that's been pulled and everything that's happened. It's not fair that Shiro's had you all this time."My voice trailed off near the end as I watched him for an answer. Deep cyan eyes searched his honey brown eyes for some sort of answer and I was rewarded for my patients when he wrapped his arms around my neck and pulling me down just before our lips could me.

"Just one?"He asked softly and I watched as his heavy lidded eyes went from my eyes to my lips and I nodded.

My mind nearly exploded when he brought his lips to mine, so soft and so sweet and so much better then I thought it could ever be. I felt as he ran his hands into my hair, tangling his fingers into the damp strands as I pushed closer to him. The fire this kiss was creating was getting sent straight to my groin and I moaned out when he gently tugged on my hair. I let my tongue flick out over his bottom lip and instantly getting permission as his tongue dove out to tangle with mine. I think my ears started bleeding when his sweet moans hit them as I bucked my hips and our erections rubbed together. I quickly slid my hands down his wet body to his ass and relished in the soft whimper I got as I squeezed his surprisingly tight ass, oh god I can only imagine that's not the only thing that's tight down there.

After what seemed like forever we finally pulled away, our foreheads resting together as we struggled to catch our breath. I let a low chuckle out when I watched him moan out as I ground my hips into him and then letting a low growl out as he ran his hands down to my butt to give it a nice squeeze.

"Damn Ichi…"I mumbled out as I brought my head to the side and felt him shiver as my warm breath danced across his ear.

"You have no idea how long I've dreamed of doing that."I purred out and I smirked when I felt his hands grip me tighter. Some where deep, deep, deep, very fucking deep down inside of me I knew what I was doing right now was wrong and that with the situation at hand I shouldn't be doing this but right now my mind was giving Shiro a giant middle finger and telling him he could go fuck himself.

"Grimm."Oh god yes I wanted to hear him scream that.

"How badly I've wanted to do this."I mumbled as my tongue flicked out to run down his already soaked neck.

"And this."I then began to place butterfly kisses along his neck and shoulder and I quickly pulled away the strap of his muscle shirt to give me more to work with. I bit down onto his shoulder earning a long low moan from him as I began to suck on the abused skin.

"O-Oh god Grimm, w-we can't d-do this…S-Shiro."I quickly brought my hand down to cup his growing arousal to get him to stop speaking. Less speaking and more moaning that's what I wanted to hear.

"Just stop thinking Ichi and enjoy it, I know you want this too."My husky voice fell to his ear as I continued to massage his erection earning soft moans and mewls of pleasure from my sweet berry. Oh fuck he sounded so damn hot, I wanted more.

My hand quickly flew up to the buttons on his pants and within a second I had them undone and was shoving my hands into his pants and pulling out his erection.

"O-Oh fuck Grimm, n-no….T-This isn't what I wan-Ahh!"I listened as he moaned as I slid my nail along his slit and his hand quickly came up to fist my jacket.

"If you don't want it so bad then why aren't cha fighting me?"I chuckled out as I listened to him whimper as he tried to stop his hips from jerking forward and he pressed a week hand to my chest.

"Your mouth is saying no but yer bodies saying yes Ichi, just let it go."I murmured into his ear and I watched him shake his head as he panted.

"P-please sto-mmm Grimmjow…."He quickly moaned out as I squeezed him tight and not long after I quickly picked up the pace and he was well on his way to the end.

"S-St-Stop o-or I-I'm gon-"I cut him off once more as I smashed our lips together. I felt as his hand came up to try and push me away but I just grabbed it and held it away. He finally let one last moan out into our kiss as he came, thankfully it shot out and not on either of us so nothing got messy. I quickly placed him back into his pants and zipped him back up as he caught his breath. As soon as I was done though a fist connected with the side of my mouth knocking me off balance, luckily I caught my footing before I landed on my ass.

"Ow what the fuc-"

"What the fuck do you not understand about no and stop?"Ichigo shouted and I watched in shock as he stood there fuming.

"Huh?"I said dumbly as I rubbed my face.

"You couldn't have just left it at a kiss, you had to take it to the next level!"He shouted and I instantly fumed.

"Whoa don't blame all this shit on me you where just as into it as I was!"I shouted back and I saw as his eyes went from anger to hurt.

"Of course I was but that doesn't mean I wanted this to happen, not like this! I told you to stop!"I couldn't help but scoff at him and later I would be punching myself for the next words that flew out of my mouth but at the moment I didn't care.

"Oh stop being such a fuckin girl Kurosaki, it's not like I fuckin raped you or something."I hissed out and I watched as his eyes went huge and his whole body began to vibrate with anger.

"Fuck you Grimmjow."His voice was absolute venom as he stomped over to his car opened the door and within seconds he was speeding away, leaving me in standing in the rain, completely soaked and feeling like I just fucked up my only chance I probably ever had of winning him over. The kiss was amazing, with out a doubt the best kiss I have ever had but I had been selfish and jealous and wanted more. But not even that amazing kiss can take back what I just did and said. I shook my head to clear my thoughts and as I glanced down at the ground I noticed that Ichigo had dropped his work shirt on the ground. It was now soaking wet just like me but as I brought it up it still had a subtle hint of his cologne on it and I closed my eyes as I fell on to my hunches and clenched the shirt.

"FUCK!"

XXX

His words wouldn't stop reeling in my mind, it was like a damn CD player playing the same damn tune over and over. The way his harsh voice cut through me like a knife, laced with such venom and anger the way my name rolled off his tongue like I meant nothing to him.

"Oh stop being such a fuckin girl Kurosaki, it's not like I fuckin raped you or something."

"Oh my god would you shut the fuck up!"I screamed as I clenched the steering wheel. I mean who the fuck says something like that? My god that was just so wrong and hurt so bad. I couldn't help but breathed a sigh of relief as I pulled up to Renji's house, it was the first place I thought of.

As I knocked on the door I could feel tears stinging at my eyes and I couldn't and didn't really want to fight them. I didn't fucking care if I was being a girl, this shit was so fucked up and I had no fucking clue what to do with all these damn emotions, I was so fucking confused.

"Oh Ichi its…Whoa man what the fuck happened?"I watched as Renji's eyes went wide at my drenched appearance, ya I looked like a fucking prize didn't I?

"The rain."I mumbled as I stepped in and I kicked of my shoes. The moment the warm air hit me though my body started to shiver, I would surely get sicker then hell for that stunt we pulled in the rain, fucking lovely.

"Oh shit dude you need to get dried off and war-"Renji's words fell silent as I just shook my head no.

"Ichi what happened man? Did it not go so well?"At his words I finally broke down everything came to the fore front and I couldn't hold back. Silent tear's spilled down my cheeks. At least if I cried I was going to be silent about it.

"Ah fuck, Tosh! Hisagi! Get down hear and bring some towels, dry clothes and booze well your at it!"Renji called as he went to take off my shirt and I shot him a confused look.

"Dude we gotta get you out of these wet clothes or else you're gonna track water all through out the damn house and that'll just be a big pain in the ass."He explained and I nodded my head and began to strip down until I was in nothing but my birthday suit. I didn't really care if the guys saw me naked, we had all seen each other naked a million times, even walked in on each other having sex a couple times, nothing was a secret among us guys.

"Holy shit what happened?"Toshiro's deep voice rang out as he quickly ran to me and handed me a towel to dry my body as he began to dry my hair, man team work ya gotta love it eh?

"How about we get him dried off and into some warm clothes and then after we get some alcohol into him he'll explain things. How does that sound man?"Renji asked and I just nodded, yes alcohol sounded great right about now.

After about five minuets I was finally dry and in warm clothes as I watched Hisagi come out with a blanket and wrapped it around my shoulders to keep me warm. I felt his warm arm come around me and gently rub my side and I let my head fall onto his shoulder.

Hisagi was the best for this kind of stuff because out of all four of us he was the most gentle and kind. Of course that didn't make him a push over by any means and we all knew you never got him angry because then the horns came out. But for the most part Hisagi was gentle, warm and loving, almost like the mother of the group, of course he'd probably murder me if I ever called him the mother of the group but still, that's how I felt he was.

"What happened Ichi, was it that bad?"His soft deep voice rang out and I could only nod.

"Okay so Renji filled me up to speed when we were making drinks, here Ichi."Toshiro announced as he handed me a tall glass filled with some form of blue alcohol. The color only reminded me of that blue haired bastard at I quickly chugged the drink back before I went into a full blown tale of what happened from the moment I got to Shrio's to the moment I drove away from Grimmjow.

About twenty minuets later all three men where sitting with there mouths hanging open and eyes wide as I finished my story, by now I was near tears once again but I held them back. I watched as Renji shook his head and downed the rest of his drink and stuck out his hand for my glass, quickly Tosh and Hisagi both downed there's and handed them to Renji as well and he went back into the kitchen to make more.

"Wow…What an asshole…"Hisagi mumbled and I assumed he was talking about Grimmjow.

"I mean I just can't believe he would even bring up the idea of raping you! That's just wrong!"Yup he was talking about Grimmjow.

"Pfft, asshole? More like prick, the guy couldn't just be happy with a first kiss could he? No he had to go and ruin it with that shit."Toshiro scoffed out and I couldn't help but smile, it was so good to have Toshiro back, I missed him a fuck of a lot.

"Tosh is right, I mean don't get me wrong I understand it must be fucking hard and all to wait for that long and then to finally get it your like holy shit but if someone tells you to stop then ya need to fucking stop. Not to even mention what he said to you was utter bullshit man, fucking prick move…..Lets go kick his ass!"Renji declared as he passed around our drinks making me snort into mine, oh ya because that will fix things.

"Oh ya because that will fix things idiot."Tosh grumbled out making Renji stick his tongue out at him like a child and then causing Tosh to roll his eyes at him and announce how much of a child he was but before things could get out of hand I spoke up.

"Okay children enough….I know how much of a prick Girmmjow is but at the end of the day I still have feelings for him and for Shiro….What the fuck do I do?"I asked and with that they all fell silent as they each took a nice long sip of there drinks.

"Fuck them both then take the one whose better in the sack."

"Renji!"The three of us called out causing him to jump.

"What geez, just trying to lighten the mood, shit my fuckin bad!"See this is why I went to either Toshiro or Hisagi for advice.

"I think you should just forget about both of them."Hisagi mumbled and all of our eyes landed on him and I watched as his eyes shot up to me and mumbled a soft sorry.

"I'm sorry man I just don't see there being a happy ending for anyone in this, in the end someone's going to get hurt, now unless you know that Grimmjow or Shiro is the one for you I personally don't think you should take either of them….I mean you've gone this far with out really having them maybe you can still do it."He explained and I couldn't even believe he was saying this.

"I mean there's only five more months of school left and then were done and off to university and most likely will never see or here from them again….Now lets say you do keep in contact well at least with this choice you know that maybe you can still be friend's with them and not loose them completely….I dunno this is just my thoughts."My mind slowly wrapped it self around HIsagi's words and the more I listened to them and replayed them in my mind the more they began to ring true.

"But what if I regret not going for him?"I asked and the three of them just shook there heads.

"Go for who?"They all asked and my eyes went large at there question.

"I dunno."I mumbled and I watched as Toshiro came over and sat next to me.

"It's okay that you don't know Ichi, where only in high school for fuck sakes. I mean the only thing really on our minds right now is sex. Where immature, restless people moving from person to person not really caring or understanding what the word love really means. This isn't the end Ichi at least this way you get to try and stay friends with them and they get to keep there friendship. Yah in the beginning it's gonna hurt but after time the wounds will heal and in no time all three of you will be on your feet all over again."Toshiro explained as he rubbed my back.

"Ya it just sucks you know."I announced and I watched as they all nodded there heads.

"Well if that's that then I might as well drown what sorrows I have in the rest of the alcohol."I said with as bright a smile I could muster and I watched as my three best friends brought there glasses up to mine and cheered and with that I spent the rest of the night drowning my broken heart in my new found friend, tequila.

A/N: First things first so I know it sounds bad right now but what did you really expect for it to go all smoothly and everyone would be all happy dappy? Lol not by a long shot! I mean I really like how I made Toshiro explain things, they are only highschool students after all, so young and naive.

And just so you know there's gonna be at least a year jump from this chappy to the next okay? Because that's how I roll people! But don't worry your pretty head's everything will be explained to you at some point or another! Hope you like and as always please review! *runs off to bed to catch some Z's*

XoXoXo-Caitie X3