Sorry for the long delay school and rping kicked my ass, anyway thank you to my new Beta, Pisces317 for looking over my work to see if I made any errors. Read her stuff it's pretty good if you love Shep Whump. Anyway without further ado….the next chapter.

C'est La Vie?

Do not always expect good to happen, but do not let evil take you by surprise-Czech Proverb

He was trapped, not in a cell, not in a hole but in the ocean in a midst of a violent storm. The wind blew violently, the rain fell as if the angels in the heavens were sobbing. Stranded in the middle of the endless ocean with not even a strip of land in sight, he struggled to stay above water. The waters were rough and even if he tried to swim he was often submerged in the icy depths of the unforgiving waves.

There was no hope. He was absolutely certain he was going to die here, in the cold abyss in the ocean.

"JOOOOHHNNN!" He heard a familiar voice call out to him before the waves pulled him under again.

He felt himself floating to the surface again. He knew that voice. It was the voice he heard on the Atlantis intercom when the morale of her inhabitants was low. It was the same voice that often held such conviction when the time called for it. It was the voice that sent delightful shivers down his spine when it uttered his name. The voice of the woman who would be his rock as he embarked on his journey of healing.

"JOHN! DON'T GIVE UP!"It called again. "Just think about swimming."

As he let himself be submerged under water one last time, he suddenly gained the strength to carry on. He began pushing through the rough waters, not caring about the fact that his body was quickly becoming tired from navigating through this storm. Soon Atlantis, the city that became his home appeared before his eyes and there waiting for him was the woman that he cared deeply about. She was on her knees reaching her hand out to him to grab.

"John, you are almost there don't give up!" She cried as he was now inches away from her. His hand now reached for hers.

"ELIZABETH!"

"Wow I have been mistaken for many things," A familiar voice said, "but being mistaken for a red headed, curly haired, woman, I am kind of flattered though. I mean Elizabeth is beautiful in her own unique way and I would be honored to-"

With his eyes still closed, a smile ghosted upon the Colonel's lips.

"Rodney," he said, "you talk about my Elizabeth like that again I will kick your ass!"

Rodney laughed and placed his hand on his friend's shoulder.

"I was only kidding Colonel," He replied as John began sitting up in his infirmary bed, "I am just satisfied with Laura…so sleeping beauty how did you sleep."

The colonel lifted his hands to rub his eyes. But he immediately paused, there was something wrong. Right before his escape from Kolya's brutal clutches, he sat in his cell running his fingers over the newly formed wrinkles. He knew he was going to have to get used to them. They were a part of him now. He knew he had to be grateful for the fact he was only fed off of once and only aged a couple years.

But when he felt around the corners of his eyes…the wrinkles were gone.

"That's strange," John mumbled.

Rodney raised an eyebrow.

"What's strange?" He replied.

John continued to move his fingers around the landscape of his face.

"Last time I checked," he said again his fingers exploring the places he mapped where wrinkles had formed, "unless I had Botox like some rich ol' hag, I had wrinkles."

Rodney frowned.

"Yeah about that," he said solemnly, "I don't know how to tell you this but…Carson tried to figure out how to get rid of your aged appearance….well he was successful in removing your wrinkles but…..unfortunately the process….I can't explain it…here let me get a mirror."

John's eyes widened in disbelief as Rodney walked to the side and picked up a handheld mirror. Not that he cared what he looked like; but, he would have rather looked like a man in his fifties at the age of 38 than have a process to bring his appearance back to his normal age deform him in some way. In alarm he began frantically feeling his face again seeing what new abnormality.

"Alright I warn you John," Rodney said coming closer with the handheld mirror, "what you are about to see will be shocking. But it's better that I show you now rather than hide it from you."

Slowly and hesitantly the Canadian Scientist handed John the handheld mirror. The colonel ripped it from his friend's hands.

"Is it that bad?" John asked.

Rodney shook his head. John took a deep breath and brought the mirror to the level of his eyes. He expected to see some deformity, but instead….he saw something different. It was him alright in the mirror, but he looked as normal as he did before the day's ordeal. His face was full of youth and wrinkle free. And his infamous thick head of hair had not even a speck of gray. It was as if he wasn't fed off of by a wraith. It was silent for a moment as John ran his fingers over the crevices of his face assuring himself it was real before Rodney's snort and laughter filled the room.

John placed the mirror on his lap, while trying his best to give his friend a glare. But happiness, amusement and relief made it impossible to keep a straight face.

"You're an asshole McKay," He said with a grin.

"You should have seen your face," Rodney said between giggles, "it was priceless!"

"Well, well, well, looks like my experimental treatment was a success," A thick Scottish accent bellowed through the room. John smiled as Dr. Carson Beckett walked over with his clipboard. "How are you feeling lad?"

"Pretty good considering the circumstances," He replied shrugging his shoulders, "I am wondering Carson how were you able to you know….make me look like a normal 38 year old…."

"Well lad," Carson replied as he sat on the end of John's cot with his hands folded on his lap, "I ran some tests after I sedated you and I found that your organs functioned normally as they should as a man for your age."

"I see," John replied raising his eyebrow in intrigue, "so I didn't age at all?"

"Aye Colonel," Carson replied, "The wraith did not take years away from you at all. I concluded that what appears as physical ageing is actually a by-product of a complex process we barely understand. However what happened today may have given me a better understanding on how the number and the length of feedings affects the body's recovery. Since you were fed off of only once and for only a short amount of time and you are young and healthy, I am hypothesizing that you were already on your way to recovery within an hour after your first feeding."

John closed his eyes and took a deep breath, laying his head against the propped up pillows of the bed. He really dodged a bullet today. It sounded almost unbelievable considering those he knew that were not so lucky after being fed upon by a wraith.

"How is this even possible?" He asked with the information that Carson gave him sinking in slowly.

"I ran a blood test after I checked your vitals and found you were injected with the Wraith enzyme," The Scottish doctor replied, "and I believe with the proper amount of the enzyme can be used as a healing agent."

The wraith enzyme had actually been a benefit for the Colonel's health? How could that be? Ford had his fill with the enzyme and look what happened to him?

"Okay now I have a question," Rodney said with his infamous deer in headlights look, "why is it that when Ford and I were injected with the enzyme it had a negative effect on us, yet when Sheppard is injected with the enzyme it has a positive effect on him?"

Carson turned his head to the Canadian scientist and gave him a glare.

"I don't know Rodney," the Scottish doctor rambled on, "I have to find that out, but I was able to-"

"Ahem," a proper British accent filled the room.

The three men turned their heads to see Thomas Moore standing by the doorway with his arms folded across his chest. John felt something was wrong. He was smiling but it wasn't his true comforting smile he usually had. The man had to be agitated about something. Well it could be from being shot today and then watching his teammate suffering the way he did.

"I am glad to see you are in one piece Moore," John said with a geeky smile. He remembered he was more worried about whether or not his comrade survived the bullet that unexpectedly struck him than the fact that Kolya had caught him. He guessed it was his mind's way to focus on something else rather than his impending doom.

Considering the mess he was in, he was pretty relieved when he heard Moore's voice on the radio during the transmission….but the relief would soon turn to terror as he faced a nightmare he could not bear to describe.

"I am glad as well to see you as you say it, in one piece as well," Moore replied, "I hate to be rude, but I would like to speak with Colonel Sheppard alone, if I am not interrupting any important duties and procedures Doctor Beckett. Also Rodney, Doctor Weir wishes to speak with you."

"Not at all," Carson said rising to his feet, "I still need to run some tests on the Colonel before I can release him, but since he has no life threatening injuries it could wait, if you need anything just call."

And as the Scottish doctor left the room Rodney also got to his feet, but stopped for a moment to whisper something in the other man's ear. John leaned forward to try to hear what Rodney was saying. But the conversation had ended too quickly for the Colonel to decipher the other man's words.

What he could sense though, was that something was terribly wrong. The tense expression from the older man, and the way the room after McKay's departure became quiet…..eerily quiet.

"How are you feeling?" Moore finally asked breaking the long eerie silence as he walked to John's bedside.

"Good….Glad to be alive," John replied, there was another pause between the two of them. From the usually verbal Moore's silence and hesitation, it was becoming more and more clear to the Atlantis military commander that something was rather….off.

John furrowed his brow. He was usually a patient man, but when he was treated like a child and everyone hid something from him for the mere act of protecting him, it annoyed him. He was a grown man and soldier, he was prepared for anything; hence why he managed to somewhat relatively calm when Kolya released his hungry Wraith on him.

With that thought it hit him. Maybe Moore was trying to tell him that Kolya was still on the loose. Alright, John Sheppard could deal with it. Besides it would be fun to hunt his nemesis down like an animal before eventually giving what was long coming to him.

"Look I don't want to play any games," John said calmly "so let's get on with it…if Kolya got away once again c'est la vie, we'll eventually catch him."

"John it's more than that…." Moore said before there was another bout of silence between the two men. Sheppard's features had tensed, thousands of thoughts and possibilities ran through his mind of what was about to be told to him. He expected the worst, but hoped there was some silver lining in the situation. And then a set of words made his world quickly come crashing down:

"Ladon Radim is dead."

John felt his head abruptly hit the pillow. He knew this was Kolya's doing, it had to be! Had his order not to give into Kolya's demands fallen on deaf ears?

"I gave you an order not hand over Ladon to that bastard," John growled as his eyes remained fixated on the ceiling. He felt Moore's hand gently touch his shoulder to comfort him but John quickly flicked it off, "don't touch me! I don't need comfort, especially from people who don't listen to me!"

Unexpectedly a growl left Moore's lips. From what the Colonel perceived the day took quite the emotional toll on the man as well.

"We fucking didn't hand over Ladon's head on a silver plate over to that spawn of Satan!" Moore roared, "He couldn't bear to know that he was the reason you were being subject to such agony! So he decided to give himself up to ease his conscience!"

"Well why didn't you stop him?" The Colonel replied.

"We did!" Moore fired back, "Do you think we didn't know the ramifications of his actions? Now we have the replicators, the Wraith and the Genii-"

"WHAT?" John said sitting up in his cot, "Are you trying to tell me that that lunatic that almost killed my team and I on numerous occasions is now leader of the Genii!"

Again there was silence between the two of them. Moore turned his head away trying to figure out the words to say. With a deep breath he sat down on the edge of his comrade's bed again placing his hand gently on the Colonel's shoulder. This time John remained frozen.

"And I was supposed to tell you the dreadful news calmly," Moore said now feeling the Atlantis military commander's body tensing beneath it. He gave the other man's shoulder a light squeeze hoping he could calm him. It was to no avail. "While Carson was tending to your injuries, Ronon, Teyla and Lorne lead a manhunt to hopefully catch the bastard before he accomplished his task of achieving leadership over the Genii, but we were too late. By the time they got there, the people had willingly accepted him as their leader."

A wince involuntarily left John's lips as he turned his head away. The reaction was partly out of fear but mostly in concern for Ronon and Teyla who were like siblings to him. There would be no hope in a silver lining for this terror if they both perished in the possible violent celebrations hailing the rise of their new leader.

"Don't worry we lost a few soldiers in the Genii riots but Teyla and Ronon made it in one piece," Moore replied as if he was reading the other man's mind, "they are on their way back."

"Lorne?" John added. He may not have been close with Evan Lorne as he was the rest of his team, but he was still a friend and an asset to his team.

"Got a little cut up but he's okay," He heard Moore reply.

He turned his head back to the other man, trying his best to keep on a brave face. But deep inside he was terrified; just as terrified as he was a few mere hours earlier. He knew he couldn't hide it then, there was no way he was going to be able to hide it now. Not with this threat looming over his head. While he was safe inside the strong fortress of Atlantis, amongst friends, the truth was he wasn't safe. He would never be safe with Kolya alive.

Before it would have been easy, but now that the man was more powerful than he would ever be, it would be more…difficult. Usually in these situations John would embrace it with no doubt or hesitation, but the situation was different. Since he was teetering on the verge of death to only find it had all along been a waste, his inner defenses had crumbled. He was left vulnerable.

"What's going to happen now?" He finally spoke, again fighting to hide the terror that rushed through his veins.

"We don't know," Moore replied squeezing his shoulder tighter hoping to give him more reassurance, "but no matter what lies ahead of us, just remember you are a fighter, a soldier. No matter how much you were hurt, in these troubled times you must remain strong. I know you must have been through storms just as bad as this, you survived them then you can survive this."

John didn't know whether to take in the other man's words or not. But for the moment he felt…numb. He went to open his mouth to respond, but he heard a voice coming from Moore's ear piece. For him it was a relief.

"Alright I'll be there in a minute," Moore said before turning his head back to John, "look I got to meet Dr. Weir as well. I know this was definitely not the outcome you wanted but I know you can pull through you this. If you need anything….you know who to call."

With that he stood up and began to walk towards the door. As he began to leave a thought popped into John's head, he needed one thing that could now distract him from the horror that was brewing outside Atlantis' walls.

"Moore," John said causing the other man to turn his body fully around, "tell Elizabeth…when she has a moment I want to see her…you know…so she's knows I am okay."

Moore bowed his head in acknowledgement and was gone. John made a deep shuddering sigh and fell backwards onto the pillow. An arm draped over his head hiding the tears escaping from his eyes. Moore was right; he had survived many things no matter how painful and devastating it was to him.

But John wondered, considering the circumstances surrounding this new roadblock, if it would be easy for him to pull himself together as he did in the past.

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