My life finally starts to make sense. The love I have for Edward, makes me blindly rush into a relationship that I don't control but also that I don't need to control. The only one who needs to control something is Edward, as he always says. I'm maybe a little careless. But it doesn't matter. I believe that if my life must end, then it will end anyway. The only thing that I wish now is that Edward would be a little more enthusiastic about "changing" me. Then we could, both of us, be in no need of control.

It's Monday. And as always, I woke up feeling tired. The sound of the rain falling on the roof is lasting. I know I should be used to it till now, but it is still keeping me awake at night for hours. Edward would arrive soon and I disliked being in the bathroom at his arrival, so I rushed myself to the bathroom. As I came back to the room, I turned on the computer, quickly cleaning the few clothes on the floor.

Edward arrived not long after the computer finally started being finally usable. I jumped on him, hugging him as he hugged me back and smelled my hair as he so likes to do. We then went down to the kitchen, where I grabbed a bowl of cereals. I looked at him staring at the fridge while eating silently.

"So do we do anything special today?" I said.

"I thought I could take you out tonight. In Port Angeles. In our restaurant." He smiled as he stated his idea.

I grinned showing him I was happy to agree to such a beautiful night with him. As I finished my breakfast, he grabbed me fast into his arms, like he was cradling me, and brought me directly into the car, in the passenger seat.

"I was almost expecting you to put me in a car-seat in the back." I joked.

Edward didn't make any comment besides a huge grin that showed me he only wanted my own safety. We parked in the nearest place of the school. We were early as usual. But I didn't dislike that, it was allowing me to spend time with him in his shiny Volvo. It was raining a lot today. The good thing is that I was now sure that Edward wouldn't disappear of school today. Every now and then, when the sun appeared, he and his family were going hunting, letting me alone, having to endure Jessica and Mike all day.

Edward was playing with my hair, and I was asking him questions about him and his family. I had still never gone to his house. I had met Carlisle at the hospital one or two times due to my clumsiness, and I never had met Esmee, though Edward told me a lot about her. The only questions coming to my mind, was about his past. He told me he didn't have anything special in his childhood besides a loving mother and father who had died of Spanish flue in 1918. He had only survived because Carlisle had saved him. He didn't like speaking about it. Anything that could relate to him changing me was out of discussions. He then asked me about my mother. Renée. I only told him the truth… That I probably was the most adult one in the family, and that my mother used to let me do pretty much what I wanted. I was a very responsible child. Both of my parents trusted me.

"We should hurry to class now Bella. The bell will ring in a few minutes." He smiled.

He brought me to my English class, stroked my cheek, and kissed my forehead softly and then disappeared. I went to my seat next to Jessica. As I opened my English notes, I found a little piece of paper.

I'll pick you up after your English class. Don't move.

E.

I smiled at this note, hoping the class will go fast. Jessica was pretty silent today. It was surprising me, but I didn't want to get into a conversation right now, so I just ignored her back.

When the bell rang, I waited patiently in my seat. When I saw Edward at the door, the classroom was already empty; I grinned at him and put my things in my bag. I stumbled on my feet and before my face could touch the floor, Edward had already caught me, and put me on my feet again. I blushed.

"Sorry… "I grumbled.

"Bella. Look at me. I drove my eyes to his". He smiled." Be careful. Please. For my sake."

I smiled and promised him to be more careful. He then took me to our second class. Biology. We had agreed that I could miss PE, thanks to his talents to charm the woman at the school desk. In biology, Edward and me were sitting next to each other. That's why it was my favorite class though every time we were chatting, the teacher was always asking me a question about what he just said. Edward always gave me the answer speaking low for me to hear.

At the end of this class, it was lunch break. Edward and me were heading to our table, when Alice grabbed Edward's arm and told him something in his ear.

"Alice! That's not fair! Come on!" I screeched.

Alice chuckled, as Edward smiled at me, and stroked my hand while Alice was finishing telling him something in his ear. Edward then smiled at me, took my hand and pulled me up again. He also took my tray. Only him could do so much with his hands without making a fool out of himself in front of the whole school. He pulled me down to the "family" table, next to him. I was now sitting with Emmett and Rosalie, and Jasper and Alice. Edward stroked my hair and whispered me that he'll be right back. I stared at him going away and then looked at the table, being really uncomfortable. Alice moved to my side, and putted her arm around me.

"So Bella, you both have a romantic night planned tonight, uh?" She grinned.

"I guess so…" I said. "He wants to take me to the restaurant we went to on our first date… if we can call it a date." I frowned.

"Oh you should wear that green dress you have! Or.. let me lend you something of mine! "

I frowned even more now. Alice was always using me as one of her dolls, saying my taste for clothes wasn't good enough, and that I needed to go out shopping with her soon. Edward came back at this moment, and tapped on his chair so that Alice moved back to the one next to Jasper. He sat next to me, and grinned. He watched Alice.

"Bella doesn't need a dress for tonight Alice!" He rolled his eyes." Let her. I love her just the way she is. I don't need clothes to make her pretty. She's already the prettiest one in here."

Alice just groaned, and started playing with Jasper's jacket. Jasper was always the quiet one. Rosalie and Emmett were keeping to themselves, talking with each other. Probably about the hot night they had last weekend or some other hot subject they could find. Rosalie was the one hating me the most, and she was the one I was the most shy with. Emmett is pretty easy to talk to though.

Edward played with a lock of my hair while I was eating the food he had putted on my tray. There was still an apple on the tray, and Edward made a sign to eat it. I frowned. He then joked about my little stomach and took the apple into his pocket. We got up and he brought me to my history class. Like a ritual, he stroked my cheek , kissed my neck and started going away. I ran back to him, and kissed his cheek. I saw a flash of anger in his eyes which was instantly replaced by a happy look. I frowned a little. He kissed me back, and told me to wait for him again after this class. And he disappeared again.

The end of the school day went by fast enough. As I was going back to my truck, Mike ran after me and started talking to me about making a trip to La Push this weekend. I frowned as he was telling me about his plan. I wanted to let him down easy. Mike had always been too much into me. He didn't understand that Edward and I could be more than just friends. Of course he couldn't find that out since Edward was often distant with me.

"You know, I'm sorry, but I'm not there this weekend. I need to go to Seattle. Family reunion." I apologized. He was disappointed, but he would just get over it.

I went to my truck and threw my bag on the passenger seat. Edward arrived and parked his shiny Volvo in the free space next to my truck. I hoped people weren't looking. The comparison between my old red truck and his shiny Volvo was really degrading for me. He came out of his car, like a star coming out of a limo on a premiere. I looked around, most of the girls on the parking, were staring at him. I chuckled.

"You should be banned from the school parking lot. You could create accidents with such a perfectness." he chuckled.

"You too should be banned then. For being that clumsy." he laughed. I narrowed my eyes at him.

I started opening the door of my truck, but in a second, Edward was already closing it again.

"You're coming with me, remember?" he grinned.

"What about my truck?" "Alice will bring it back to your house. I promise." I frowned but agreed to the terms of the deal. He scooped me in his arm, and carried me back to his car, opening the passenger door and sitting me delicately in the front seat. He's probably the only one able to carry me that easily. He's not even looking like it's taking him strength to do that. At the moment he grabbed the seat-belt I gave him a look. He chuckled and dropped it to let me do it myself. In less than one second, he was in the driver seat, all ready to go.

While driving to Port Angeles, I stared at him driving. I tempted putting my hand on his thigh. He smiled. The coldness of his body wasn't scaring me. It was different, but in a good way. He was cold but at the same time so warm with me. Knowing that I knew the whole truth was making him happy and freer. He took his hand put it on my thigh too. I frowned.

"Both hands on the wheel mister!" i chuckled and pushed his hand away.

"Bella don't be childish. I can drive with one hand without problems" He laughed, trying to put back his hand on my thigh.

"If you keep your hand there, I'll drive back after eating." I stood firm on my demands.

"Bella, I have better reflexes than you. I don't want you to drive. You go too slowly, and I'm sure we won't have an accident if I'm driving!" he scowled.

I sighed and pushed his hand back to the wheel. "Please, keep both of your hand on the wheel. " I smiled. He gave up and kept both of his hands on the wheel as I kept my hand on his thigh.

When we arrived at the restaurant, too early thanks to his frantic driving, he opened me the door as a gentleman. The rain was pouring and he had grabbed an umbrella in the back of the car for me. I came out of the car, and leaned myself against Edward to walk to the restaurant. Only such a city as Forks could endure rain the whole day. I sighed at the view of the heavy rain falling from the angry clouds. Edward whispered in my ear "don't worry, it will stop." I smiled at his comforting words. We went in and sat in the same place, we sat the last time. I prayed god that the waitress would be a different one. Last time we went here, the waitress had spent her time checking out Edward, hoping he would talk to her or even let her his phone number. Edward had told me all about her thoughts.

He chuckled as he understood where my thoughts were going. "She's there. I hear her thoughts again. Nothing about me though…" he grinned. "So what do you wish for dinner? "He asked.

"I guess I'll take those raviolis again" I felt like the last time. The atmosphere was warm and I was happy to be with Edward alone.

The waitress arrived, and to my big disappointment it was the same one. She smiled to Edward, not even looking at me and took the order that Edward was telling her. He gently putted his hand on mine in the middle of the table while she was still there. He grinned when she finally went to the kitchen to deliver the order.

"What are the others doing tonight?" I asked Edward curious about the way the family is living.

He smiled. "I guess they will go hunt soon. And then when they're back at home, they just do what normal people do… you know…reading, playing, watching TV…" he laughed. "We're quite the same you know… we just ... Don't eat the same thing." He laughed again.

The waitress arrived and putted the plate in front of me. She proposed again something to eat to Edward, but he kindly declined the offer. When she was finally away, he hinted me to eat the hot raviolis. I picked one with my fork and put it in my mouth. He watched me eat, playing with my finger ring, thinking. He seemed obsessed with that finger. I asked myself why. But the thought quickly went away when the waitress came back another time to ask if everything was going alright. Edward sighed a little and told everything was fine.

As she left again, I asked Edward what she was thinking. "She is thinking about having me as her boyfriend…" Edward playfully answered. My eyes narrowed. He grinned and shaked his head.

When I was done with my plate, Edward asked me what I want to do, and I said I want to go for a walk. He frowned his perfect eyebrows, and smiled my favorite crooked smile. "It's still raining you know?" he asked.

"I know. I just want to breathe some fresh air right now. "I explained. "But let me some human time right now…" I smiled. As I was going up, he grabbed my arm.

"Bella… you think I'm a fool? Stay there. You can have your human time when I'm back." He went up and directly went to the front desk to pay. I sighed. I didn't want him to pay for MY food. That wasn't fair. I grabbed two 20s out of my bag, and ran after Edward. When the receptionist told him the price, I jumped in and putted my two 20s on the desk, smiling so that the receptionist takes my money and not Edwards. Edward looked at me, a flash of anger in his eyes. He took my money, and put his black credit card on the table as fast as he can for the receptionist to not see. I sighed.

"Stay there." He smiled. "Or do you still need some human time?" I shook my head while being silent. He went to take his jacket, and mine on the chairs of our table. As a gentleman he helped me in my jacket, and took me out of the door. "Come on Bella. I can't let you pay. It was my idea. Plus I need to thank you for even coming with me here." He stroked my cheek, and gave me a kiss on the forehead. Edward is always so protective of me. He doesn't want to hurt me, and always tries to stay to a safe distant of me. I do think he loves me more than he thinks. He tried to stay away from me for so long, that it made him tired, of hoping I will forget him. Now he just goes with what I want. And he tries to make me safe. I smiled as he kissed my forehead again.

"Alright alright… I just don't like that you always pay everything you know…" I smiled. He opened the umbrella for me to go under, but I wasn't in the mood for that. I started running through the parking lot. Edward frowned and checked around if there was any danger. I was already dripping. The rain was falling heavily on the floor and on the cars. The sound was the same one that was keeping me awake at night, only right now it was nice to hear it.

I ran a few meters, thinking Edward would catch me by now, but he was still staying under the umbrella near the restaurant. He was smiling at me. I kept running a few meters. I tripped on my feet, and fell on the wet floor. The pain in my hand made me scream. The tears were coming to my eyes faster than I wanted them to come.

I tried to move my hand a little but the pain overran my body. I watched the blood dripping from my fingers. It's then that I realized that Edward shouldn't even be near me right now. "Don't come! Stay over there! "I yelled.

But Edward was already next to me, attending my arm. He ripped a small part of his shirt and rolled it on my wrist, the blood was still flowing out of my arm. That couldn't be good. He then scooped me in his arms. "It's ok. I'll be fine. I just have to get you to the hospital fast." He said anxious.

I panicked. "Oh my god.. Edward… no please! No hospitals. I don't want to go to the hospital!" I stared at him. "Please…" I was almost begging him.

"Let me at least get you to Carlisle Bella, that cut is really bad. And I know you're feeling pain otherwise your eyes wouldn't be teary right now." He sighed.

"Ok. Take me to Carlisle. But at your house please. Not the hospital." I started feeling dizzy.

"Just don't be scared. I'll run to my house, it will go faster, than taking the car." He stated. "I won't let you fall, so don't be scared."

He started running really fast. It was like being in a train with your head outside. The air rushing through your face and your hair, making your ears ring was making me dizzy, even more than I already was after seeing my own blood dripping from my hand. The run from Port Angeles to his house didn't last very long. He must have indeed run really fast. As he slowed down, and carried me through the house, I caught a sight of Esmee, who was reading on the couch peacefully. She panicked when she saw Edward and me. But Edward didn't stop. He just walked fast upstairs and directly into Carlisle's office.

"Carlisle, please help me! Help her!" he yelled. He tried to put me on my feet, but I was too dizzy to even stand up on my own. Edward caught me again before I fell on the floor, and helped me to a chair in front of Carlisle's desk. Carlisle grabbed his first-aid kit in the cupboard and pulled a rolling table to me.

"Edward, it's ok now. Go out of the room. Trust me. She'll be fine." He stared at Edward intensely like he was talking to him in his head. I frowned even though I couldn't really concentrate on anything besides my nausea feeling right now. Edward went out of the room. And Carlisle took my hand delicately to put it on the little table.

I opened my eyes a little and he smiled at me. "It's going to be ok Bella. We both know how clumsy you are. You were lucky Edward was there, though." He ripped off the piece of tissue around my wrist, and the blood came out a little more. I closed my eyes again. But I could still smell the blood, and it was bothering me. "Let me just wash this fast, yes?" I groaned. He chuckled. He went to look for a towel, and put some fresh water on it. He then cleaned my arm, and hand.

"I think you might need some stitches Bella." He said.

"oh god. No." I groaned, feeling dizzy again just thinking about a needle. Carlisle smiled compassionately. He prepared his set to do the stitches, but as he started grabbing the needle, I panicked and a small scream let itself out of my body. I frowned. But in the seconds following that scream, Edward ran back to the room, grabbed my whole body, carried me in the corner, and put himself in front of me in a protective way. I was shocked. "Carlisle…" he said in an angry tone.

"Edward. I wasn't going to hurt her. "Carlisle answered. "Bella needs stitches." He showed him the needle. Edward started to relax a little, and turned himself to me.

"Bella... why did you scream?" he asked looking into my eyes with his deep stare. I blushed.

"I'm sorry. I just don't like needles. I'm scared of them. "I sighed. Edward chuckled. He carried me back to the chair.

"I'll stay with you." He said as he grabbed a chair for himself, and put his arm around my shoulders. "It will be fine. Carlisle is very good, you won't feel anything." He looked at Carlisle with a meaningful stare. Carlisle nodded.

"Ready Bella?" Carlisle asked. I nodded to him.

I didn't know why Edward was putting himself in such a position. It was probably the worst place he could be right now, smelling my blood and resisting his nature to not hurt me. I think he mostly stayed to be sure nothing would happen to me again. His protective being was coming out right now. He did even think Carlisle would hurt me. So I just enjoyed the fact that Edward was staying for me. I putted my head on his shoulder, and closed my eyes as Carlisle was doing his work on my hand. Edward kindly stroked my cheek. I could almost believe nothing had happened. But I knew that when I will open my eyes again, I'll see Edward's face torn with guilt. It was my entire fault. My clumsiness was often ruining my day, but tonight it mostly showed Edward I was a danger to myself. And I didn't want him to think that he was putting me in more danger than I was before.

Carlisle cleared his voice. "There. It's over Bella. You can open your eyes." He said. Edward watched me open my eyes. I smiled at him.

"I'm sorry." He stopped me.

"You have nothing to apologize for Bella." He stroked my cheek. "I know you're clumsy. I'll just be more careful with you in the future. "I sighed happy. He didn't think it was his fault. He just knew I was clumsy, and that nothing could have stopped this from happening.

Carlisle finished by putting a bandage around my wrist and made me promise to be more careful. "No more running in the rain for you" he laughed. I smiled, and thanked him profusely.