DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN 39 Clues.
Author's note: THIS CHAPTER IS FULL OF STALKERFANS, NERD FIGHTS AND DAN VS. NATALIE FIGHTS. HOPE U LIKE IT!
Jonah wanted to read first.
Amy Cahill liked to be the first one up in the morning. But not if it was because of someone was screaming outside her hotel-room door.
Everyone was staring at her.
"I-I-t was annoying." Amy said in defense.
"Telegram for Mr. Cahill"
The words were accompanied by thunderous knocking. Amy bolted upright in a panic, a terrifying thought racing through her mind. Madrigals!
"Really Ames, did it scare you?" Dan mocked her.
Amy cheeks started to burn it was like everybody was against her or something.
"W-We didn't know we were M-Madrigals before Africa remember?" Amy replied.
"Oh yeah." remembered Dan "and before Kurt." he said then quietly.
"Kurt?" Hamilton who apparently heard Dan asked "Who the heck is Kurt?"
Amy buried her face in her hands.
"Kurt?" asked the others.
"Calm down people, there is no need to start a riot." Dan announced "To make a long story, short. Kurt is this guy from Africa who has a crush on Amy, Amy thinks he's really hot, and the next thing I knew he started becoming our crazed stalkerfan.
"Stalkerfan?" sputtered out Natalie "Only Kabras have stalkerfans! Right, Ian?"
"Right you are Natalie." smirked Ian "but Amy? Has a hot stalkerfan?" he began to mumble.
"Not just hot Cobra." teased Dan "Really hot."
"Bloody hell," Ian wheezed then he said arrogantly "Who cares?"
"Yo, I have a ton stalkerfans to you know." Jonah said indignantly.
"We know." said almost everybody.
"D-Dan" Amy said meekly "H-He wasn't a st-stalkerfan."
"HALLELUIHA SHE SPEAKS" Dan said half-talking, half singing.
Amy, her brother, Dan, and their au pair, Nellie, had fled to a different Cairo hotel in the night,
"Isn't au pair a fancy name for nanny?" Madison said.
"Yes, also another term for baby-sitter." said Sinead.
Madison nodded.
"Oh so your nanny's name is Nellie!" Natalie suddenly remarked.
Ian poked her.
"It's not nanny, Cobra, its Au Pair." Dan said.
"It's just the same Daniel!"
"No, it's not."
"Yes it is."
"Ok seriously, cut it out both of you!" shouted Hamilton.
The two became silent. Jonah continued reading.
Afraid they might be attacked by the mysterious sect that they knew so little about. The Madrigals couldn't know where we are, could they?
"Amy you were really paranoid weren't you?" Sinead stared at her.
Amy blushed furiously.
Dan rolled off the fuzzy gold couch he was sleeping on and landed on the floor with a thud.
"No, Irina! Not the Catfish Hunter!" he yelled. Amy sighed. Once again, her brother was locked in a dream in which their beloved cousin Irina Spasky was shredding a beloved baseball card with her fingernails.
Almost every one of them laughed.
"Hey! Irina freaks me out ok?" Dan began to turn red.
"Really Daniel, how mature" commented Ian superiorly.
"And wearing pink silk boxers with dollar signs is mature how?" Dan replied sarcastically.
Everyone started to laugh harder.
"Wake up, Dan. You're dreaming"
Amy had never felt so tired in her entire life, and her brother was, as usual, was acting like an idiot.
"Well Amy, Daniel always acts like an idiot, like what do you Americans call it? 24/7" Natalie said in a bored tone.
"Natalie, do shut up" Dan mimicked Natalie's British accent.
"No, you shut up Daniel" Natalie retorted.
"No, you"
"Both of you shut up" Hamilton butted in.
"Why are you always fighting?" Reagan asked Natalie and Dan.
Both of them shrugged.
"Jonah, please continue" said Sinead. Jonah continued reading.
"Telegram!"
The knock on the door came again.
"It's really getting annoying" said Ned.
"Agreed" added Ted and they started high five-ing each other then cringed.
"Dan! Get…the…door!"
Amy stuffed her face in a pillow and screamed. She was awake for good and she knew it. Peering past her pillow, she saw that Nellie was still totally dead to the world.
"Niceee… frustrated Amy" Hamilton joked "It's so very Un-Amy-ish".
"Coming!" cried Amy "Hold your horses!"
"Weird." said Reagan.
When she reached the door, she hesitated, a familiar fear gripping her insides. What if she let's someone dangerous in?
Come on, Amy, get a grip.
"Who could that be?" Natalie's sickening sweet voice asked sarcastically.
Amy stomach churned like she was going to puke from the humiliation.
Amy opened the door, her eyes settling on an Egyptian bellboy standing in the hall. He was shorter that she was by a mile, wearing a spiffy red uniform with gold buttons up the front that was at least two sizes too big. In his hands was a sealed envelope.
"Amy is scared of an itty-bitty bellboy" scoffed Natalie in a baby-ish tone she said bellboy as if it was a curse.
"Ok that's it Cobra" announced Dan annoyed "There's only one person who could make fun of my sister and that's me!"
Amy smiled it was sweet at the same time insulting.
"What are you going to do? Punch me?" Natalie rolled her eyes.
"No" grinned Dan "That would be against the boy code. This is what I'm going to do" he moved toward Natalie as if he was going to hug her then with his sharpest fingernail scuffed Natalie's shoes.
Natalie gasped "MY NEW CHRISTIAN LOUBOUTIN HEELS!" she howled "I WILL SUE! I WILL SUE YOU, YOUR FINGER AND THE ENTIRE BOSTON AREA" and tried to scratch Dan with her perfectly manicured hands but Ian held her back.
"For you, madam, from the desk. Someone has leaved it"
"Why did he use leaved?" Ned asked.
"Why what's wrong with leaved?" Ted replied.
"I think it should be left." said Ned "What do you think Sinead?"
"Let me think about it." Sinead said.
Then they started squabbling about which was right.
"Quit it with the nerd fight" Dan suddenly said.
Amy took the envelope, and the bellboy stepped a tiny bit closer, beaming at her expectantly.
"I bring message from the desk," said the bellboy. "For you, madam."
"Seriously, why does he have bad grammar?" whispered Sinead to Amy.
Amy shrugged.
His feet were halfway in and halfway out of the room which made Amy nervous.
"Is there something else you have for me?" asked Amy.
"Someone has leaved it for you," he said, pointing at envelope with a happy grin.
"Amy, you never heard of tips?" Natalie said in mock surprise.
Amy looked as if she was going to cry.
"Cut it out Natalie." growled Hamilton.
"Give him this," said Dan "Then I can go back to sleep".
Dan's voice was muffled, and when Amy turned around, she saw that he was talking into the carpeted floor, too lazy to lift his head. He was holding up a five pound Egyptian note, worth about one dollar
"American bum" Ian muttered.
Amy shut the door. Curiosity killed any hope of going back to bed. The envelope had been addressed on an old-style typewriter that appeared to be missing the capital A. The underline was also randomly stuck on some of the letters.
DaN aND aMY CaHILL
Reagan clucked her tongue in disgust like using a typewriter was a huge insult.
She tore it open and sat on the couch, her face whitening as she scanned the note. Saladin meowed hungrily and raised his back, claws bared on the gold bedspread.
"Dan, you better get up here."
Dan didn't move, so she yelled.
"TELEGRAM FOR DAN!"
Dan lifted his head as if mustering the energy for a comeback, but Amy could tell her brother was still clawing his way out of dreamland. He stood up from the floor and dropped heavily on the couch.
"Like I said before, American bum" murmured Ian.
Nellie was stilled curled up under the covers on one of the two beds in the room, the thin white cord of her iPod ear buds snaking out from under a pile of seven pillows covering her head.
"The girl can sleep through a demolition derby" said Dan.
Amy sighed for once she agreed with her brother Dan the dweeb.
"Dan! Listen!" Amy said, holding the telegram as she began to read."'Cairo International Airport, Locker number 328. 56-12-29. NRR.'"
"Maybe it's a trap?" Hamilton suggested.
"Sounds like a lame trap set by one of our competitors. Let's order room service and go back to bed."
Everyone looked at him in amazement.
"I and Dan-o have connected brains." he grinned giving Dan a high-five.
"I don't think so," said Amy. She held out the message so Dan could examine it. What he found on the paper took his breath away.
Cairo International Airport, Locker number 328. 56-12-29. NRR.
Under the birch tree
Six inches deep
Lies a treasure of bottle caps
A child did keep
"Bottle caps as treasure?" Natalie said snootily "I think not,"
Lazy Dan left the building and was replaced by Alarmed Dan.
"Did American bum Dan ever leave the building?" hissed Ian.
"Cobra, you have serious issues. What's up with you and bums?" said Dan who actually heard Ian the first two times.
"No one knows about this, not even Nellie."
"Grace knew," said Amy. "You, me, and Grace. Whoever sent this must have known Grace well enough to get this out of her."
"Shush everybody there's a secret" said Natalie.
If there's one thing Natalie is interested more than shopping, it's secrets.
Dan was still to dumbstruck to respond, but Amy knew what he was thinking. Just last year he'd brought his prized collection of bottle caps to Grace's mansion-everything from Dr. Pepper to vintage Coca-Cola-and all sixty-three caps in a super-cool old school cigar box. Grace had given him a spade and told him he could bury it in the property if he wanted. He'd told Amy and Grave where the treasure was hidden, even how deep he buried the box, just in case he died unexpectedly, snowboarding or skydiving. As he said at the time, it paid to be safe with a bottle cap collection.
"Some secret," Natalie mumbled under her breath.
"So you're the kid that uses bottle caps as treasure," Sinead said.
Dan nodded.
Dan looked at his sister, his green eyes brimming with hope.
"Do you think Grace is helping us again?"
"Whoa, whoa Grace helps you?" Hamilton said "How can she help you if she's dead?"
Dan and Amy looked at one another.
"She 'coincidently' has friends in clue locations" explained Dan making air quotes.
Amy and Dan both used Grace's name as if their grandmother was still alive, and for a moment it felt like she was. Their beloved old Grace, who'd given her heirs a choice: a million dollars or one of the 39 clues leading to immense power. Amy still couldn't believe where the chase a led them in such a short time. They'd traversed four continents and been nearly killed more than once by their own relatives. If there was even a chance Grace Cahill was still offering help from the grave
Everyone looked sorry including the Kabras.
"Come on. We're getting out of here."
"A page break," Jonah said "Should I continue?"
"Yup," Dan replied.
Ten minutes later, Dan and Amy made their way down to bustling hotel lobby with nothing but a backpack between them. Dan insisted on bringing his precious laptop, and Amy had grabbed Nellie's cell phone, just in case.
"I left Nellie a note saying we went looking for doughnuts. Let's just hope this doesn't take all morning. What we need right now is a way to the airport," said Amy.
"No worries, I got it covered."
Dan opened their backpack and removed a wad of money, stuffing the rumpled bills into his pocket. It didn't amount much, about fifty American dollars' worth of Egyptian pound notes.
"Daniel is rich, for once." Natalie whispered to herself.
Dan glared.
"Yo! Cabby! Yo!"
Jonah stopped "Trying to imitate me?"
"Nope,"
Dan held out a few bills and waited.
"We're not in New York," Amy hissed. "Try to act like you have a clue".
"Money is the universal language," Dan grinned.
The Kabras raised their eyebrows though as if they agree.
"Point," Natalie said.
"FOR ONCE YOU TWO AGREE ON SOMETHING," blurted out Hamilton.
As if by magic, a black-and-white car with monstrous luggage rack pulled up and skidded to a stop. An Egyptian man jumped out and waved to Dan and Amy over.
"Oh it's the cabby we hired sister," whispered Ian.
Natalie nodded.
"AHA!" Dan exclaimed like he discovered something.
Amy looked at him quizzically.
"Told you, the Kabras hired the epic taxi dude to plant the tracking device,"
"You didn't tell me anything," Amy whispered.
"In case you haven't noticed Daniel, everyone can hear you." Ian said scornfully.
Dan gritted his teeth "I bet you even followed us".
Natalie squeaked and looked at Ian like how does he know?
"Come, come I have nice car for you"
Dan tossed Amy an I-told-you-so look and marched for the car. The cabdriver hopped out and opened the door, then quick as a rabbit, snatched the backpack from Dan and headed for the trunk.
"No thanks, amigo. I'll keep the bag on me if you don't mind."
"You do know you're not in Spain right?" Sinead said.
"I know I have limited Egyptian vocabulary," said Dan.
The driver didn't seem to understand, so Dan grabbed the backpack, handed the cabby a ten-pound note, and dove into the backseat, commando style.
Amy turned bright red and stammered an apology. She had a feeling Dan was warming up for a long morning of humiliating her sister.
"Ames, Ames" said Dan sympathetically "You know me so well,"
"Dweeb, I've known you since you existed" Amy whispered back.
"We're in a hurry, my man." said Dan, confirming Amy suspicions. "The airport, double time".
"Fast is middle name!" The man laughed, slamming the door just shy of Amy's foot and racing for the front seat.
"What's with Egyptians and their lack of pronouns?" Sinead mumbled.
"Pro-what's?" Dan said confused.
"Blithering idiot" Natalie muttered to herself. If Hamilton or worse- Dan heard her she might as well say goodbye to Christian Louboutin.
"You see there, sis? Everything is fine. This guy is perfect. Just sit back and re-laaaaaaah-!"
The cab (and Dan) screamed into the traffic, weaving and dodging like an amusement park ride gone haywire. Amy tossed into Dan, then against the door then back into Dan as they dodged honking buses and irate pedestrians.
"Did the cab driver ever heard of-" said Ted.
"Traffic safety rules?" Ned finished.
When they hit a slow patch, Amy caught sight of a big problem behind them. She turned to her brother, wide-eyed and worried.
"Typical Amy," murmured Dan.
"He does leave a little to be desired in the safety department, doesn't he? I'll ask him to take 'er down a notch".
"Typical Dan," muttered Amy under her breath.
"N-N-No! Tell him to speed up! Speed up!"
Dan glanced past his sister's stricken face to the bright yellow Vespa zigzagging between cars behind them. Someone in a purple sweat suit was riding it, and that someone was huge.
"It's Hamilton isn't it?" guessed Sinead.
"Hamilton Holt!"
Hamilton beamed.
"Your size riding a Vespa?" said Ian with disgust "You should drive a hummer instead".
Dan and Hamilton looked at one another like it was some sort of private joke and laughed.
It was Hamilton Holt of the Holt clan, a family of nitwits also in search for the 39 Clues. The Last time Amy had seen him, Hamilton had left for her dead in a Tokyo train tunnel.
"Ok Amy," said Hamilton "I left you for dead in Tokyo but it isn't a reason to call us nitwits, we take offense at this"
"I-I-It was b-before I knew you were smart, Ham" said Amy.
"Yeah dude," said Dan.
Hamilton shrugged like to say OK.
"Step on it!" yelled Amy, but the driver didn't seem to hear her. Dan pulled another precious ten-pound note and tossed it into the front seat.
"You're scared of Hamilton?" Natalie rolled her eyes.
"O-of course not!" stuttered Amy "W-We we're j-just worried about our lead that's all,"
"Besides Natalie you should've seen your face when we trampled you and Lord Neatness in the road of bones," covered Hamilton.
Amy smiled at Hamilton.
Ian glared silently at the little scene playing out; someday he is going to get that Hamilton Holt for calling him Lord Neatness.
That seemed to get the driver's attention. His foot came down on the gas pedal like a hammer and the cab swerved violently into high gear. For the next ten minutes, Dan threw more and more money into the front seat until, at last, they looked back and Hamilton Holt was gone. When the cab lurched to a stop outside the Cairo airport, Dan checked his pockets, they were empty.
"Is okay," said the driver, grinning from ear to ear. "You pay plenty already!"
"Nicely done, dweeb. Now we're stuck at the airport with no money. Nellie's going to love us when we wake her up and discovers we've stolen her phone, spent most of our cash, and need a ride from the airport. And we don't even have doughnuts yet! Could it get any worse?"
"I think it just did," said Dan.
Amy heart sank as a black stretch limo pulled up to the curb behind them, and a door opened.
Ian and Natalie Kabra, a Clue-hunting team infinitely more dangerous than the Holts, had arrived on the scene.
"At last" Natalie exclaimed "the dreaded story is finally getting better".
Ian smirked.
"Again, we take offense at this," Hamilton protested.
Jonah closed the book then he asked "Dudes, who wants to read next?"
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