Hello people who read this story! I'd like to mention that for this story, as it's earlier written chapters were written before I had further read into the books, that there are some plot holes! For one, the girlfriend situation will have happened… earlier, and also Simon can deal with speaking of and being in holy places. Like the Institute. Any other ones I apologize for, but just take it as kind of a different reality.
Love. Love is wonderful, beautiful and otherwise glorious. Those who have fallen under it's spell tend to find this, unless the situation of the attraction is inhospitable or otherwise difficult. There are one-sided loves, two-sided loves and sometimes even three-sided loves! There are times where the victims may fall in love at first sight, or other times it takes years for it to develop. Love is endless. It comes in any shape or size. If you wanted to look at it from a scientific view you would see that it's a drive in animals and humans. It has three stages: lust, attraction, and attachment. The chemical drive behind these forces is immense, and mixed with pheromones tends to be an irresistible part of life. Always haunting the back of people's brains, taking over in the least likely and logical scenarios; love is always there. A driving force.
Now, our beloved Simon. Yes, yes, him. What seemed like a simple, logical sound thing like love now haunts him devotedly. So what is the answer to these problems that make his life a living hell? Denial, of course!
Upon the result of Simon's conversation with Jace Lightwood at Clary Fray's birthday party the young vampire stormed from Institute, heading with violent speed to a nearby park to cool down. While sitting on a cold swing he had a brilliant idea as to how to deal with the situation at hand: not deal with it at all, and pretend it never happened! Wonderful he thought to himself, I'll never mention it again and settle with hating the guy! My mind is probably just going through a faze, trying to replace Clary, and so it randomly picked Jace! No problem.
Denial. A sensual idea, and an amusing one at that. In the days that followed he encountered a high ranking vampire, met a boy, messed with his mother's head and moved in with the boy (name being Kyle).
It was upon walking home one night, and being viciously attacked by men in hoods, that the great Jace Lightwood appeared in Simon's life once again. If vampires could tell temperatures, Simon would have known that it was a mildly cold night, but as it was he could not feel anything besides the feeling that something was wrong. Suddenly, a white van pulled up behind him, and two thugs in gray hoodies carrying weapons stumbled out. They resembled the mugger that had attacked him to a tee (which had happened not all that long ago, if you haven't bothered to read the books). Before he could do much else two things happened. One, Jace jumped from presumably a roof, landing on one of the offenders, and the other attacked Simon. This proved to be an unfortunate choice of actions, seeing as he was torn to pieces then turned to salt as a result of Simon's curse.
The next thing Simon could remember was Jace standing above him, shock and worry clouding his voice. "What was that? Simon!" Words fell from the vampire's mouth, but he couldn't hear them. The shock of what had happened was still biting at Simon's mind.
Simon was pulled from his state by the feeling of having a warm body beside him. The vampire looked over, and it finally clicked that the person who had aided him was his Jace. No, not my Jace. A Jace. The Jace. Why is it always the Jace? His mind mumbled to itself. "Are you okay? You don't look so good…" Jace put his hands on Simon's shoulders. The feel of his strong hands was like a slap in the face. Simon bolted to his feet. "I- it wasn't my fault!" Jace stared at him. "Can I crash at your place?" The words echoed about Simon's head before he could absorb them. "What?" Simon heard his voice crack a little and cursed himself for it. "I think I need to watch you. You seem to be being hunted." Jace pointed at the pile of salt as he stood up. "What? No I'm not!" Simon's panic was growing. Jace raised his eyebrow. Simon sighed, trying to calm hiself down. "So you want to look after me, like a bodyguard or something?" Simon laughed a bit at the thought. But Jace was staring at him, completely serious. "Well, yeah." Like it was something completely normal. He does realize I kissed him, right? No, that doesn't matter anymore. Simon shook his head to clear the thought. "Fine."
Once they arrived at the apartment it was like Simon was floating in a dream. Why is this happening now? Jeez. He knew it didn't do him any good to find bliss in the situation, but it was so hard to turn off. Jace inspected the place, and concluding it was satisfactory he slumped onto the couch. Simon looked the boy over. He was still as beautiful as ever, and he mentally slapped himself for noticing. But he also picked up that Jace's eyes were dark, and he looked overall unhealthy.
"Are you alright? You look… sick. When was the last time you ate?"
"Uh, yesterday I think."
"Oh, brilliant. This doesn't have anything to do with you and Clary, does it? If you don't mind me asking." Simon turned away from the boy and walked to the kitchen.
"No, you're right. I do mind you asking."
Simon pulled open the fridge, inspecting for any food that might be lurking in its depths. When he closed the door Jace had moved to inspect the plants Kyle was growing. "Hey, there's no food in here, so let's go shopping. What do you want?" He called over to the angel. "I don't know… soup and a mango?" The boy called back. "Soup and a mango... alrighty then! Let's go."
The store was fairly empty, due to the time of night, but there were still enough people to eye the two boys that it felt uncomfortable. At one point Simon turned to find two girls giggling about Jace. One went up to him and gave him her number. Simon had never wanted to punch a girl so hard. Once they had gone the vampire went back to the cart, soup in hand. "What did they want?" Simon said, staring down at the cart. "I think she said she wanted to touch my mango." Jace was now inspecting the soup. Simon flushed. "Time to go." Simon pushed the cart with such force that Jace, who was leaning on it, nearly fell over.
The city was calmer at night, for the most part, and as the boys walked through deserted streets, Simon reviewed his situation. The vampire knew being around Jace made him jumpy with glee, and Simon contented with telling himself that it was only because he was… a good friend. Or someone who made him feel powerful to be around. There had to be a good reason somewhere in his mind. He sighed. The orange lamplight's romantic feel wasn't helping anything. A woman's laugh filled the silent void of the street, and suddenly Jace sighed. "Simon, I've been meaning to ask, but why are you attracted to me?" Simon nearly fell over. "I- I- What? What are you talking about?" Jace stopped. Simon turned around slowly, holding his tongue. Jace breathed in, closing his eyes. When he spoke, it was on the breath out, and with careful choice of words. "You kissed me. You said it started on the boat. Why?" Simon took a step back, hoping to coax the boy into walking. It wasn't working. "I was, um, dealing with some things back then. Don't worry, I'm not… there anymore." Jace still wasn't moving. "Simon, don't lie, it doesn't suit you." Panic flooded over the vampire, feeling as if a chain had fallen over his neck. "Jace, um… did I mention I have a flatmate? Cause I do. His name is Kyle! You should meet him, c'mon." Simon turned and began stalking towards his building.
Jace moved with such speed even Simon didn't hear him move. Suddenly Simon was against the brick wall, two strong hands holding back his shoulders. "Jace, what-" but his complaint was never voiced, as Jace's lips covered his. Shock was the first emotion that shot through the vampire. Then joy and the urge to faint pooled through. Now, Simon was no expert on kissing, but he knew for a fact that Jace was holding quite a bit back, his lips gentle on his own. Simon resisted the urge to pull him closer once more. The passion Simon had to contain was immense, but luckily he managed to keep some sense about him. He knew Jace was only testing him, teasing him probably. Mocking him and any sort of pride he had left. Oh, what the hell. Simon felt a mental snap, and suddenly he was grabbing Jace. His hands glided to the back of his head, snaring countless locks of golden hair. Their mouths were gliding together flawlessly, a state of perfection. Jace hands moved to hold either side of Simon's face, finally pulling them apart. Both of them breathed heavily, Simon doing it mostly to regain sanity, before Jace gave a little snort of laughter. "Liar."
The rest of the walk back to Simon's house was in dead silence, Jace looking smug, Simon completely defeated. Upon entering the house Simon quickly heated up the bowl of soup, and put it in front of the boy who was already seated at the table. Simon stared out the window as Jace spooned the liquid into his mouth. About halfway through the meal Kyle walked through the door. He walked into the kitchen, and stopped dead once he spotted Jace. "Well, well Simon. You didn't mention your roommate was a werewolf." The rest of the night flew by, Kyle and Jace fighting over who should be Simon's bodyguard with heated conversation.
"I'm going to sleep." Simon called to them over their bickering, and he stepped into his barren room. Turning to shut the door he found Jace already stepping through the opening. "Quite a space you've got here. Minimalist. I like it." Jace said in a friendly way, smiling at the walls. "What are you doing?" Fright was clouded Simon's voice to his horror. "Thought you might want some company." Jace winked at him. "I hate you so much. Please get out." Simon turned away. "You don't really get this whole bodyguard thing, do you?" Jace shut the door behind him. There was a silence, then Simon turned back to face him. "Why are you doing this? I don't understand what you get out of torturing me. Oh wait, let me guess. You have something going on with Clary and need to take it out on someone. Namely, me." Simon scoffed, crossing his arms angrily.
Jace glanced at Simon with something that he swore was desperation, and then he looked down. "In your own words 'I am not doing this because of Clary'. You're not really a dick though, so I'll leave that part out." Jace smiled at his floor, raising his head slightly. Simon breathed in, a habit he had yet to rid himself of. "Well then, why are you doing it? I'd love to pretend that everything never happened, but you seem determined to make that impossible." At that Jace looked up, his face solemn. "Do you think it's possible for someone to be in love with two people? At once?" It was said meekly, but the tone was solemn and deep.
Simon thought about it. He had had two relationships at once, and though he wasn't in love with either of the women, he'd still been attracted to them. And attraction eventually led to love, as it had with Clary. "Yeah, I'd say so. But what do I know? And that has nothing to do with why you're being so cruel."
"Actually, yeah. It does. Sadly, it really, really does." Frustration was leaking into Jace's voice. It scared Simon a bit. "Now, Simon, I don't fall for people easily. At least, I never had before I met Clary. So many people wanted me, none would do. I was sure that once I met Clary that I had met my soul mate." Simon felt his spirit drop a bit, but his curiosity was still riotous. "And I still am, believe me, but… just not exactly soul as in sole." Jace's eyes now fixed Simon's, waiting for a response. Simon wasn't sure he was hearing right. His heart would have been in overdrive if it had had any drive at all. Simon opened his mouth, willing himself to say something, anything. Nothing came out but a kind of whimper. They stared at each other, and Jace began to step forwards, raising his arm to the vampire's shoulder. The moment he touched his skin, Simon felt his head clear. The vampire jumped back, and slammed against the wall. "W-what?" He yelled, voice cracking. Jace sighed.
"You, you moron. I'm in love with you." Simon's legs gave out, and he slid to the floor. "No you're not. You hate me. You hate me so much, and you love Clary to the ends of the earth." He was aware his voice was shaking. Jace sank to his knees, shaking his head. "I thought I hated you. I hated you and Clary, and you for being with her, but later, looking back at it, I realize that I despised her for being with you as well." Jace moved his hand to rest on Simon's knee. "Simon, I-" Simon could no longer stand the situation. Without fully understanding what he was doing he backhanded Jace across the face. He obviously wasn't expecting it, or he would have stopped the attack. The angel fell back, and Simon jumped up to stand above him. "Jace, you're not in your right mind. I can see that, and I don't want you to do anything you'll regret, so I want you to leave." Jace stared up in disbelief, opening his mouth to voice an objection. "Now." Simon growled, feeling his rage building. As stubborn as Jace was, he knew better then to try to convince the boy anymore.
After Jace had left, Kyle stuck his head through the now-open door. "Hey, what was that about? I thought he was set on being your bodyguard." Simon just stared at him, then shook his head. "I'm going to sleep now." Kyle slowly nodded, and pulled the door closed with a little creak.