Okay! So here's the next chapter! I'm not sure it's my very best but I'm hoping it'll get better after all the angst. It may take me a while to get the next one up but be patient! It will be here! :0)

Disclaimer: I own nailpolish that is Seddie Purple and Nickelodeon Orange but I do not own iCarly

XXX
SAM

It felt like years since I had last seen Carly. She still looked exactly the same. Clean hair, perfect skin... girly as usual. She stared at me like I was some sort of lost moose...

"S...Sam?" she rasped.

I gave a forced smile, hoping she wouldn't be able to tell that I was crying. "Hiya, Carly..."

We stood there for a while, in awkward silence. Neither of us knew what to say to each other. Do we hug? Do we catch up and tell each other the riveting tales of our new lives? I didn't expect her to welcome me back with open arms, but she was the only one I could turn to. Mel and Jules would be too apt to help me the instant I showed up at their door. I didn't need that right now. No pity. Just help for me and my baby.

After a while, Carly spoke. "So... What are you doing here?"

For some reason, the way she said it and the way she was leaning against the door frame menacingly caused the floodgates to open. I was suddenly there in the hall, sobbing with abandon. Blame it on the hormones.

"I... I need help Carly!" I cried. "Chandler is a jerk! He threatened to kill the baby if I don't get an abortion! But I can't do that because it's what me and Freddie have wanted for the longest! And I'm not ready to face him yet! I can't! I can't I CAN'T! He'll hate me, Carly!" I was pouring my heart out. Everything I had kept hidden came to the surface. Somethings I didn't even know I kept hidden were flowing out of my mouth like vomit. "I still love him... I still love him more than anything and if Chandler hadn't been so damn... CHARMING I for sure would have killed myself. Freddie was everything I wanted... and needed. And I threw that away..."

I hadn't even noticed that Carly had pulled me into her arms and patted my back comfortingly. It was like we had never stopped being friends. "It's alright, Sam..." she whispered. "Everything's fine. Your safe now."

"But I'm not safe..." I sniffed. "Chandler is gonna find me. And when he does, the baby..." I gave another sob. "I can't let anything happen to my baby..."

Carly pulled me in to her apartment and forced me to lay on the couch while she left for a moment. The room was quiet as I lay there crying. When she returned seconds later, she had a glass of water, some blankets, a change of clothes, and a hairbrush. She set the water down on the coffee table near my head so I could reach it if needed.

"I hate seeing you like this..." she whispered. From the way I was lying down I couldn't see her face but I knew from her shaky tone I knew she was crying with me. Like a true friend. "Here..." she pushed the clothes into my face. "Change into these. There fresh from the dryer so they'll warm you up. Then come back here and you can tell me everything. And I'll brush your hair like I used to. I hope it still calms you down."

I sat up slowly, holding my spinning head until it stopped then looked up at a Carly who gave me a small smile. "Thanks, Carls..." I whispered, taking the clothes from her and going into Spencer old bathroom.

"Hey!" she called.

I turned slowly. "Yeah...?"

She rushed towards me with her arms open and grabbed me in a comforting hug like she always used to when I was at my worst. "Stay, Blond..."

I half chuckled and squeezed her back. "Stay, Brune..."

XXX

Carly and I sat there, on her couch talking all night. I laid on her lap as she brushed my hair until it was static-y and I explained everything while eating a bucket of fried chicken from Cockeyes. It was just like old times when we were teenagers and life got rough.

"So here I am... a pitiful lump of in denial depression..." I took another bite of the chicken.

"Hey... You're not entirely pitiful..." Carly replied, braiding and unbraiding my hair. "You dealt with you and Freddie's break up much better than he did..."

I scoffed. "I sat around for a month letting a control-freak-psycho-path run my life like a show..."

Carly sighed. "Well yeah but... Freddie lost his job..."

I sat up quickly. "What? But Freddie loved working at the new station!"

She shrugged. "I'm pretty sure he loved you more."

My heart sank. I was the reason Freddie lost a job doing the thing he loves most? "I hate myself..." I whispered.

Carly shook her head. "There's more..."

I started to feel sick. "Y-Yeah..."

"...He drinks to escape the pain."

I collapsed back onto the couch. "He drinks..." I swallowed hard.

Carly patted my shoulder. "I think you should go talk to him..."

I groaned. "He probably hates me..."

"No! He doesn't hate you at all! He's still hoping that you come home! He talks about you all the time. When he's drunk the only thing that comes out of his mouth is: 'I miss, Sam...' or 'Do ya think she still loves me, Carly?'" She said in a mock Freddie voice.

"Of course I still love him..."

"Then go talk to him!" Carly urged. "Go and tell him that you love him!" she suddenly broke out into a beaming smile. "And don't forget to mention that you're carrying his baby..." she gently patted my stomach.

I smiled. "Yeah... I guess I can't leave that out."

"How far along are you?"

I looked down at my still virtually flat belly and placed my hands against that little baby bump. "The doctor says almost five months and that I should start showing more soon."

Carly pulled me into another hug. "I'm so happy for you..."

"Thanks. And I guess you're right... I do need to talk to Freddie."

"Atta girl Sam!" Carly lightly pushed my shoulder. "Tomorrow then! Right now you and my little niece or nephew needs some sleep. You can take my bed if you'd like."

"Aw, Carls, I can't take your bed!"

"But you're sleeping for two now!" she giggled. "I insist. If you sleep on the couch I'll feel awful."

I sighed. "Fine... If you really want to..."

"Go to sleep, Sam!" Carly pushed me towards the stairs. "You know where it is. Goodnight. Love you, Sam..."

"Love you too Carly..." I smiled and turned off the lights downstairs. Why did I ever run away from friends like this. Friends that treated me like family, and opened their arms to me even after and hurt them. Running away from the good things.

The song!

I rushed upstairs and fumbled through my coat pockets to find my PearPod. I turned it onto the song I was listening to for the performance in Russia. "Running Away" by AM. It was me and Freddie's song.

The song we listened to when we shared our first kiss under the stars.

I keep running away
Even from the good things

"Freddie..." I whispered.

Suddenly I felt something strange in the pit of my stomach. Like butterflies except it was more physical. I placed my hand on the baby bump and knew what it was.

The baby was missing Daddy too...

XXX
SAM

"Here we are..." Carly murmured as she put the car in park. We had pulled up into a parking space across the street from Freddie and my old apartment building. "You ready?"

I took a deep breath before looking up at her. "Honestly? No..."

Carly touched my shoulder sympathetically. "There's no need to be scared, Sam."

"I'm not scared for me," I rasped, my voice breaking with emotion (damn hormones). "I'm scared to see what he's done to himself." We were silent for a moment while I tried to gather my thoughts and keep those stupid tears in. I refused to cry again.

"Well," Carly spoke softly after a while. "Go on, Sam. I'll be here if you need me."

"Carls, you don't have to-"

"I know... But I will."

I smiled gratefully at her and leaned in for a hug. "You're an awesome friend, Carly."

She chuckled. "So I've been told..."