Disclaimer

I am not the owner of the persons of this story met with in the movie and I never will be, I am not making any money whatsoever from this little story and I will never expect to do it either. If anyone feel like building further stories on persons, localities and events here created then they can feel free to do it – provided only that they try to stay in the given pre-histories, given personalities etc., and keep from turning their stories into adult stories. R&R's are welcome.

Egghead of Eggheads

Max and Norm took a glance at the calendar up at the wall. They had checked day after day until a day marked with red ink was drawing close. They both knew what the marking meant.

"It is time." Max said.

"It sure is. We better remind Jake about it. He is living without calendar after all, he is getting used to measure time in seasons not days now." Norm concurred.

So Jake was notified in the afternoon the same day. When he saw the message he gave a sigh, knowing fully well what it meant. He walked over to Neytiri who was sitting and mending her baby sling that little Thomas had bitten a big tear in. Mo'at had just three days before been told that he would one day in the not so distant future get a new brother or sister. And now Jake said: "Day has come for a new ISV arrival. Would you like to join me with receiving it?"

Neytiri gave a little hiss of exasperation but he was never in doubt that she would never allow him to face that little risk of facing a new Valkyrie space ferry all alone. It would hardly be much of a risk but there still was a small risk that RDA marines would burst out of the cargo door with guns ablazing. So a strong kumpongu of na'vi warriors were always present at those dates, few of them visible but hiding in the grass and trees, and warriors riding on ikrans with machine gun armed passengers were waiting in the trees. And all defensive systems at the Augustine Research Station would be at red alert and ready to give fire if the order went out. Angie at the radio alert watch would now double as flight controller and she always made the ISV crews perfectly well aware of that fundamental facts down at Pandora had changed during their flight time from Earth.

So at the designated time the message was displayed at the monitor:

"ISV Super Nova is calling flight controller on watch at Hell's Gate. Come in please."

Angie now started playing the pre-recorded information announcement:

"As You may know if You picked up the declaration we broadcasted, Pandora is sovereign territory at which no ISV is allowed to call with intention to establish any mining operation. This means that no technical or military landing will be tolerated, only scientists bringing their own avatars will be allowed down, we will then interview them to see whether they will be able to work and thrive under the regimen the Namana Land Confederation will impose on them. Give reply if You intend to land in peace to disembark your payload and passengers, and not risk being shot down by our defence systems. We the staff at the Augustine Research Station – mark the new name, please – are willing to purchase spare parts and other supplies You have brought for running the station, we offer to pay for these supplies with refined unobtanium ore we have stored. Reply Your acceptance of these demands if You wish to unload Your cargo and recharge the fuel of Your ISV."

None of the three ISVs that had come calling earlier had made any attempt at violating the strictures imposed on them, neither did ISV Super Nova – indeed the commander obeyed flight instructions with so exceeding zeal that Jake started suspecting foul play. The Valkyrie landed in the dusk, only a single scientist disembarked and walked to the barrack building. It was a small but very stout woman, she named herself Mathilda Cummings and gave her research field as astronomy. "I intend to do some close-up observations of the three stars Alpha Centauri A, B and C. But now I am tired after my voyage, I intend to retire for the night if I may." And she did, leaving Norm to postpone the interview for tomorrow.

Towards the evening Trudy stood in the courtyard of the station and watched the space ferry crew offload the supplies they had brought and load the ore they had received as payment for them. Trudy remarked the haste the crew worked with, far into the dark. When finally the loading job was done the time was something like three AM and the crew boarded the space ferry – why, estimated time of departure wasn't until one PM tomorrow?

The skipper came over to her and handed her an envelope he asked her to give to Max when he woke in the morning. And then he boarded the space ferry too – no, he RAN aboard! Leaving a perplexed Trudy behind in the night.

The cargo door was closed and suddenly the engines ignited. Trudy screamed her protest and fired a warning shot but the shuttle crew took no notice. Inside the flight control room Angie yelled into the mic: "Valkyrie 2, You are NOT, I repeat NOT cleared for take off! Back to launch pad dammit! You read me, bastards! Put 'er back down NOW!" But the crew ignored her protests and the Valkyrie took off and was airborne. Max and Norm came running but they couldn't engage the anti-aircraft rockets in time – they had been switched off as soon as it was clear that the Valkyrie had no hostile intentions. Everybody had been fearing a Valkyrie arriving with evil intentions, nobody had thought about stopping an escaping space ferry. When the rockets had been engaged a deafening sonic boom was heard as the Valkyrie left, the space ferry was out of range for the rockets.

A flabbergasted station crew stood at the station launchpad. Trudy picked up the letter she had dropped during the mayhem and gave it to Max like the skipper had told her. Max opened it and he read:

"To mr. Max Patel and His Excellency Jacob Anderson Sully, chieftain of the Omatikaya clan!

We the crew at ISV Super Nova have had the very dubious joy of bringing miss Mathilda Cummings from Earth to Pandora. Actually she has been a royal pain in the neck every moment she has been out of hibernation!

She has social IQ closer to zero than I ever imagined possible. They say that women use to have a social intelligence above most men – here is a glaring exception! She is a hog at the meal servings, only grudgingly accepting that she can't exceed her rations without starving the rest of us. She has drowned us with boasting about her powerful relations, impressingly successful study, her meritorious sponsors at the college… She seems to think that academic funds are bottomless wells of cash for her studies…

She insisted on astronomic measurements even when we needed to calibrate navigation instruments for the approach to Pandora, putting us all at risk for a navigation error that would have sent us all hurtling down into the atmosphere of Polyphemus.

She has stridently insisted on 19th century gentlemanlike manners even in the cramped and mostly male environment aboard an ISV. By Jove, this has been a space flight by a space navy crew, not a picnic at a nobleman's manor! But – she has never made any attempt at behaving ladylike herself towards us in the crew!

I hope with all my sincerity that You will forgive us our haste with taking off from this space port, we had a secret council aboard ISV Super Nova and we decided to get rid of her any way we could – and we simply couldn't 'space walk' her. So if You will do us a favour then please do to this hyper-spoiled brat what her parents ought to have done long ago! You will earn the eternal gratitude of this little ISV commander, I will certainly plead in Your favour should the company come up with some sleazy trick!

Your most grateful,
Captain Percy Robbins
Commander of ISV Super Nova"

"What on all of Pandora are we going to do with this?" Max asked in bewilderment.

Norm responded: "We need to tell Jake as soon as he is awake in the morning. He and the other Omatikaya leaders are good at jacking down overblown egos, do you remember how Mo'at blew away the hubris of the Gehrken couple? Granted, this is a more serious case but we have to try."

Jake had returned to New Hometree in the evening after the Valkyrie had landed. He had seen that short, fat scientist who walked into the barrack, and he had pointed her out to Neytiri: "I don't think you have ever before seen a really fat person, my dear. Kim Chae Tai is stout but that woman over there is in a league of her own! If she is as thick-headed as she looks like she will probably be sent right back to the ISV tomorrow, Max and Norm will see to that."

Neytiri commented: "You are right, I never before saw any human like her! She certainly looks odd and unhealthy."

Back at New Hometree there were many things to do. Hunting parties gave reports, gatherers told him about a patch of knolls discovered, etc. Life returned to normal affairs quickly.

But in the early morning day after, shortly after Jake had awakened, Max called him through the radio with news: "We have a new case of goofy scientist who is in serious need of a wake-up call. This Mathilda Cummings was simply dumped here by the ISV crew, they simply took off and fled from Pandora rather than giving us a chance with sending her back up, and the ISV have not responded to our calls for coming down to bring her back up either. Seems like they want us to simply bring her up like a child."

Norm came in: "We have seen her and my goodness, she is among the most befuddled scientists I ever saw, Jake. Think about some scientist as pigheaded as Quaritch, multiply this with a brain as blindly idealistic and out of touch with reality as the Gehrken couple you may remember, to the power of a childish spoiled brat. And add to this a simply repellent look, and you have miss Cummings. We will give her our standard crash course given to all new avatar drivers, and in the strong likelihood that this will fail to convince her to the superiority of the way of the People we'll hope you will be able to startle her into her right mind, could you come to take care of her in the afternoon? PLEASE!"

"I will see what WE can do about this." Jake turned to Neytiri: "That fat scientist we saw yesterday, do you remember her?"

"Yes I do."

"Turns out that she is a narrow-minded, stubborn and human blinded one, and she must have been spoiled rotten by too indulging parents. The ISV crew must have been so seriously pissed with her that they dumped her down to us and fled rather than taking her up again. It will be up to us to teach her the manners of behaving, the wisdom of seeing, the patience of knowing when it is time and when not. I think I have an idea how it can be done. Do you remember Bill and Celia Gehrken?"

Neytiri closed her eyes and they sprang out from her memory: A good-looking and athletic man and his equally sporty looking wife – who were totally immune to understanding Na'vi sensibilities. They could never accept that even though their sciences – archaeology and paleontology – needed lots of digging it was still not OK to just hack into any other hillside. A tree shouldn't be felled just because there MIGHT be something interesting in the ground below it. After a dig into an old graveyard they were brought to the presence of Mo'at who gave them a flaying speech, the day after Max gave Jake the news that they had decided to return back to Earth with the ISV due in a month or so. Everyone were relieved, a crisis had been averted.

"I am off to explain this to mother and listen to her advices. May be we can make her teach herself to see like I did." Jake said. And he added: "And then I will assemble a team to demonstrate for her some things the efficient way."

Neytiri mused: "A team? Are you going to play her some jokes and tricks, ma'Jake?"

Jake gave a curt answer: "I do have plans. In case the crash course of Norm and Max doesn't work I have thought about not one but two ways of getting through to her. You'll see, I think "

The A star had risen and a new day had started. The breakfast signal had been sounded and the station crew had eaten their fill and had gone to their tasks or studies. Then only, when most of the others had left, came a rotund woman waddling down at the mess hall and demanded her breakfast with a high-pitched voice.

Cook Vytautas came to the counter and informed her that breakfast time was out. "But I came down from space yesterday and out of hibernation just two days ago, I am hungry! So get me some – straight away!" The cook gave her an exasperated shrug and put a tray with a standard breakfast meal in front of her and she gobbled it down – to the last crumb of the second serving!

Max and Norm had then been standing in the door to the mess hall for some time. When she chewed the last of the crumbs they took action. Norm took the word: "Good morning, miss Cummings! We have made ready Your avatar, when we have checked that this is working all right You will be given a crash course in conditions at Pandora. For the success of Your study program there are certain rules You will need to know and follow."

"Can't say I think I need any lecture on that, I read a whole book of them back at the avatar course at Earth. And I learned what I think I will need to know about the nature, flora, fauna, culture etc. of Pandora. I can remember those lessons well."

"Miss Cummings, now it is getting serious. Things have changed radically while You were on Your way here. RDA isn't in charge of a single thing any longer here at Pandora. You could say that we are like an embassy from Earth here, this isn't Hell's Gate any more but the Augustine Research Station, named after the late Grace Augustine, the author of those manuals you read. The reason for our existence is to do research not mining. Being so few as we are now after the eviction of the RDA staff, we all have to do our chores with the maintenance of our living here at the station. Since You are a newcomer You will have to earn Your grades in the daily chores. You are an astronomer right? We will see if Angie at the radio lab would need an assistant."

Max continued: "Working with Your chores may be a drudge to You but there is one even more important fact to life here at the Augustine Research Station. We live here at the grace and with the benevolence of the na'vi clans, when for any reason they want us out then we are off, all and everyone of us, with first ISV calling. It is an important item in the syllabus of Your crash course why this is so. We have sent back to Earth scientists who failed to abide with the rules before, that is far better than letting Your blood taste the neurotoxins of a na'vi arrow! And believe me, we here at the Augustine Research Station will NEVER allow a scientist who doesn't respect the rules set for his or her activity to jeopardize all the projects of those researchers who fit in well! We are simply unbelievably lucky that one former avatar driver is the mightiest of all the clan chieftains!"

Mathilda interrupted: "Are you telling me that serious science here at Pandora is working at the whim of monkeys in the forest? Are you quite in your right mind? And a human is bossing over a bunch of wild, fleabitten aliens? How could that be remotely possible?"

Norm concluded: "The essence of the crash course is stated by this good, old proverb: When in Rome, do as the Romans. Anything else is to risk your very life – and our too! The details of the rules – oh yes, it might be a good idea to call them laws – might seem arcane and cumbersome, the reasoning behind them is often crammed with funny superstitions and obscure traditions, and they are enforced with a strict and ruthless hand. But the result of them is absolutely undeniable: They, and the na'vi ability to connect with all of Pandoran nature, are what have always kept Pandora from turning into an ecosystem gone haywire like Earth. And hopefully they always will."

Max sat down right beside her and stared her right into her eyes, and he said with a stern voice: "You asked whether scientists here nowadays are working by the goodwill of the local na'vis. And the answer to that question is a clear and unequivocal YES, that is exactly what we are saying, ma'am! Only that the na'vi people are neither wild nor are they monkeys and they are not very fleabitten either. They are smart people, I do sometimes think that they are smarter than us humans since they have avoided ruining their ecosystem. In the afternoon You will come to discover so yourself! You will meet him in person in the afternoon, after the end of Your crash course."

Mathilda sat and watched a gruesome movie, showing massacres and other awful depredations, narrated by Norm. After the movie had been switched off and light had been turned on again, Normed turned towards her.

"Having seen what you have seen I guess that you are not wondering why we live under a regimen where the Na'vi always have the right of the way. I was the driver of one of those avatars battling the RDA goons to get them off this moon and you saw us marching them off the moon of Pandora. Believe me, I have seen events far worse than what you just have seen now, only that no camera was present at the time."

"But still it is too bad that scientific research is kept back just because a tree is blocking the way. Why not just move the graveyard that hindered Gehrken, for instance?"

"You are simply not getting it, I see? Local sensibilities must always recede in front of the all-conquering progress of science, huh? There is no use in explaining you rules if you don't accept the basic idea behind them. But I have an idea that Jake is going to pull a rabbit up from his top hat this afternoon… He is a creative mind when it comes to creating surprises."

It was lunchtime and all the avatar drivers present sat and ogled that woman who looked like she was trying to find out if she alone could manage to eat the whole lunch table served. In the end, when everyone had left the mess hall and she was just starting to eye the serving table to get herself yet another serving, Max interrupted her. "Now is time for second part of your crash course. Get into your avatar body and fill that one up with food too. Jake Sully will soon be here to take over and you had better be ready for it by then!"

Soon after she rose from the gurney and watched her new and blue body – an impressing sight to behold! She had never been so slim since she was a little girl! But Max was right, she was hungry still and she got herself a good serving from the fruits and the leaf wraps on the table – "nikt'chey" Norm called them. She heard him in the background murmuring something into the throat mic and then he came to her, cleared his throat and announced: "Jake will be here in a few minutes. Mind you, treat him like he will be expecting – he is after all a king of sorts now…"

Mathilda could see a flock of flying beasts above the tree tops in the distance. Coming closer she saw that they were banshees – and they appeared far larger than she had had the impression of reading the syllabus book at the avatar course. Coming even closer she could see that there were na'vi persons riding them. They landed and Mathilda saw that they were all females. One of them approached Norm. "Oel ngati kameie! Good to see you Neytiri!" Norm said, took a bow and touched his brow.

The na'vi female named Neytiri returned the greeting and turned to Mathilda. "You must be miss Ma'tilta Kummings. Welcome to our moon! Your name means in Na'vi 'My manners' – we hope you live up to that name! I have brought Peyral, Walala, Ninat and Maltalt, we shall have an all-girls chit-chat to give you tips about important things at Pandora – about wildlife, plants, history and traditions, while I will tell you the most important things about politics. He should be here soon – yes there he is!"

Mathilda looked up to the sky and saw a huge orange coloured flying beast, obviously a leonopteryx, or a "T-rex with wings" as a frightened soldier had once said. When it landed she saw a male riding it – was it possible? He dismounted and the awesome beast lunged for her and shrieked. That male then walked to her and said: "I am Jake Sully, formerly corporal of the US Marine Corps, now olo'eytkan of the Omatikaya clan. I have come here to direct Your education, miss Cummings, in what it takes to live and study here, and to help me I have brought my mate Neytiri and some friends of her – I presume that Norm and Max have educated You a little about things too."

They walked in under the awning that had been the na'vi school building of Grace's school. The six females sat down in a ring and started a talk, viewing it from the outside Jake thought that they only needed a jug of hot coffee, some bisquit or a gatto may be, and some handicrafts to make a human knitting club of girl friends… Jake had betted that female solidarity might be a good way of sugar-coating the bitter pill of unwelcome strictures to her activities.

Jake kept mostly in the background and only broke in from time to time to serve them some fruit and some water to drink. He could see that the friendly atmosphere caught the initially sceptical Mathilda in, she really got some food for thoughts. But as the day wore on they looked like getting stuck. Jake tapped Neytiri softly on her shoulder to catch her attention, she looked up, nodded and rose from the circle. They drew a little apart and then Jake inquired with a soft-spoken voice: "Is she finally understanding some important facts?"

Neytiri replied: "She is on her way but our arguments are obviously crashing with her fundamentally human mindset. As I expected, it took you three months and a love story for you to overcome this block, we don't have that luxury."

Jake countered: "You had something more too, my Neytiri, you had the Tree of Voices that night we mated too… I have had a talk with mother and she gave me her go ahead – it is a little risky but I think it should work well…"

Neytiri gave him a horrified look: "You are not thinking to… are you? It would risk her whole sanity!"

"I can't say that I can see any other way to break down that human mindset block quickly, we can't expect any na'vi male to romance her either. We will now pass to phase three in the Operation Mathilda Turnaround."

Mathilda was sitting and eating a nikt'chey right then. Jake caught her attention and told her: "Now you should eat to your belly's satisfaction, for the high point of your Pandora course is still ahead. You have heard some rules that apply here and why, I will now explain you why they are for the best no matter the necessity of science progress."

Mathilda ate yet another nikt'chey, drank a cup of water more and rose up. Jake decided to get going now. "All of you follow me please, Mathilda you can take place at my back on my toruk." She grudgingly did as she was told. Soon after they were airborne.

Neytiri knew where they were going but not the others, but the na'vi among them soon understood: the Tree of Souls. They landed and walked to the old tree. "An old friend of mine is right now sitting and waiting for us among these leaves, we can go in to meet her. Just walk in among the branches, Mathilda!" Jake said.

As they now walked in among the branches, Jake manouvered himself behind Mathilda. He took a branch and then quickly grabbed her queue and brought the small tendrils to the branch. The effect was immediate: Mathilda stopped cold in her tracks, glared with wide open eyes and gasped, and after some seconds she fell down on her knees.

Minutes passed, they could hear how her breath became laboured, they could see how sweat started to drip from her brow, how she started to sway and how her gaze became empty, finally tears started to run. Then she looked like coming out of her trance, her eyes fixed on her followers again and with a shivering movement she took her queue and broke the connection with the tree branch. And then she sank to the ground, completely exhausted. Her six followers then took her and brought her out and into the free.

About an hour later she had rested enough to start talking, and she sat up to look them into their eyes. "That is the beyond slightest doubt most awesome experience I ever had in my whole life time, and believe it or not but I have been through some events in my time – discovering a super nova in the Proximate Magellanic Cloud, being awarded my PhD degree, holding my little newborn brother in my arms when I was a little girl… But this experience got to take the prize!"

Jake and Neytiri spoke, almost in choir: "Tell us what you have seen!"

"When you Jake took my braid I felt irritated but I had no time to protest because then a lightning bolt struck my head! All of a sudden I was bathed in light and a mighty voice called at me, sounding like a wise old LADY: 'Mathilda Simona Cummings! Why have you come here?' I looked up but I couldn't see anyone."

"You have met with Eywa, Matilta!" Neytiri explained.

"I was astonished that this someone even knew my middle name I never told anyone of you! I had only one thing to do, I was down on my knees. 'I want to study those three stars up close, ma'am!' I stuttered.

Then I heard another female voice from just behind me: 'That is only partly true Mathilda, and all the truth is what is wanted. So carry on, my dear!' I turned around and I saw a middle aged human woman with long, curly red hair, wearing a lab coat."

"That can only be dr. Grace Augustine! She was killed by RDA bullets just before the Great Battle." Jake said.

"I simply watched her in numbed silence. She watched me with inquisitive eyes and said: 'If you can't talk for yourself I will have to do it for you. Mathilda, you are basically fleeing from your past life, admit it. And you are fleeing to a place as far away from your past life as possible, to put a clearest possible dividing line between the two lives. Isn't that correct? Think hard and speak up frankly now.'

I stared at her for a long time and finally nodded.

'Then do realize that what you are really fleeing from is the part of yourself you are secretly loathing – your big body, your boorish manners, your pampered background. But try as you might, you can never escape from yourself, not even in a new body. Your big shape will be back before you know it, your teammates at the Station will be shunning you like they did at Earth, and your research project will only stumble along like the project you finally had to give up at Earth because you couldn't get the funding you needed for it.

I'll tell you a secret you were not supposed to know, Mathilda. The reason that you were sent here to Pandora at all was very simply that scientists and administrators at your university decided to get rid of you by sending you here, and collected private money to sponsor your ticket. Your one-way ticket. They even bought you an avatar to make their offer even more tempting for you. That was how desperate they were at seeing your back for the last time.

What you really need is a fundamental change in your personality – starting today. Since there is a whole year until the next ISV arrival there is only one other realistically possible outcome. That one.'

And then she pointed behind her and I saw a na'vi looking person but with five fingered hands and dressed in shirt and trousers, lying face down on the ground with an arrow in the back. The mighty voice from above spoke: 'This might be You in some months time, Mathilda!'

I started crying and I SCREAMED in dismay: 'But how can I manage to turn myself around? What is the recipe – tell me please! PLEASE!'

Then the woman you named Grace put her hand on my shoulder and said: 'You should begin with heeding the rules given you by all people you meet along your way, ask whenever you are in the slightest doubt and take to heart all advices you get, whether clearly stated or implied. They are there for good reasons. You have now been given the most important lesson of your whole life. Your vital task for the coming time, by far more important to you than your research project, will be to learn to live and be happy with them. They will even make you a more sociable person among humans too. That is the end of this lesson, Mathilda. So you are now ready to leave this zone, you can now disconnect your braid from the tree branch. See you soon and hopefully under more benevolent auspices!'

I reached back into my neck, found my braid and loosened it from the branch – and here am I!"

Vytautas the cook could easily see that the headstrong avatar driver that had walked out together with Max and Norm after lunch had turned to a downcast and cowed one when she in the evening came back for supper. She took a seat along with Ella van Laare, the gardener at the hydroponic garden where parts of the proteins in the human nutrition at the station were produced. Van Laare was a confirmed, hardened and committed spinster, in her human body she even looked like an old-style prude. She had agreed to put Mathilda to work in the garden as her assistant and let her be her protégé otherwise. When she ventured outside Ella was her chaperone, and Matilda eagerly absorbed her advices. Jake was notified when she after some time started venturing outside on her own and had her shadowed, he could with satisfaction note that van Laare wasn't lying when she reported that Mathilda made good progress in her respect for the nature and traditions of Pandora. She finally made her successful body switch. In the limbo she briefly saw Grace Augustine with a broad grin of satisfaction.

And the day would come in the future when Mathilda would become a valiant defender of Pandora, when the Second Human – Na'vi War broke out. She really did end up with an arrow in her back, fired by a hostile clansman in the service of RDA. The difference was that the arrow wasn't a punishment for some serious crime, it was a heroic death she was remembered for. Am'tey, her mate, was left with two years old Tanya to care for, luckily for him there were many females who volunteered to lend him a hand with his motherless daughter.

Ella van Laare had shed her spinster lifestyle once she met a dashing Kilvan clansman during the war, the daughter she one day gave birth to was given the name Ma'tilta in honour of a woman who came to Pandora with a totally skewed way of life and thinking, but turned her life totally around for the infinitely better.