He sighed shakily before getting up from his bed. Today was the first day back to Degrassi after spring break and he was scared shitless. He could admit that since he had that conversation with Liberty at the cementery he felt better. Much better actually, he threw some stuff out from his room, and even though it was only 2 or 3 things, he felt proud of himself. He even suggested to CeCe and Bullfrog he get a therapist to which they both quickly agreed.

But he was still scared of how things would be between him and Clare because even though part of him hated Clare for leaving him like that another part of him wanted Clare in his life even if it was only as friends. But it didn't matter what he wanted, it's what she wanted and that's what he was scared to know.

He walked down the stairs and into his kitchen all dressed up and ready to go when he saw his parents in each other's arms smiling and gazing lovingly at each other. He smiled. That's what he wanted one day, what his parents had. They had been married for 20 years yet every time they see each other it's like the first time.

He cleared his throat which caused his parents to pull apart and look at him. His mom blushed and walked over to him. "How are you feeling baby boy? Are you sure you want to go to school today?"

"Mom I have to go sooner or later and I just want to get this over with." He replied honestly while grabbing an apple. He kissed his moms cheek and nodded at his dad before heading to the bus stop.

Once at Degrassi Eli felt sick. He felt as though he might throw up or something. He needed to calm down he kept telling himself but it wasn't working. Taking a deep breath he walked up the steps and into Degrassi silently hoping Clare had already went to her locker. He sighed and lost all hope of today being a good day when he saw Clare, Alli and Adam standing by Clare's locker laughing. He slowly made his way to his locker muttering a quiet 'excuse me' to Alli who was standing in his way. They all grew quiet and stared at him shocked.

Adam was the first to break the silence by yelling "DUDE" before attacking Eli in a hug. Eli chuckled and smiled slightly. He took his things out of his locker and headed to class when a hand clasped on his shoulder. He turned around and his heart dropped.

"Clare?"

"I wanted to apologize. For breaking my promises I just didn't know what to do." She said all while staring at the ground.

"Its fine. I love you enough to let you go, so as long as your happy I'm happy" He said smiling a small smile.

At lunch Eli sat by a memorial who he had just noticed, belonged the same guy that Liberty went to visit a few days ago. That must mean she went to Degrassi. So lost in his thoughts Eli didn't notice some walk by and stop in front of him.

"What are you doing here?"

Eli jumped slightly and relaxed when he saw it was just Fiona.

"I um I didn't want to go to lunch." He whispered shyly.

"Oh. Well would you mind company? Holly J has a student council meeting." She said already sitting next to Eli.

"I heard about the whole rehab thing, I'm glad you're better. "Eli said looking at her and smirking slightly.

"Yeah. I heard about the car accident. I'm glad you're better." She said teasingly which caused Eli's smirk to turn bigger.

"Yea well, I'm crazy haven't you heard?" Eli said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. It was true; there was new rumor spreading through Degrassi. Supposedly the schools emo boy tried to commit suicide by purposely crashing his hearse and they had locked him up in the loony bin. Even worst then that they were saying he came back to Degrassi just to kill Clare.

"Yea well I never trust rumors. Besides I know what it's like to be called crazy." Fiona said smiling at Eli.

"If you ever need someone to talk to about anything, look for me. I know what it's like to feel crazy so just know you're not alone. Only a crazy person understands another crazy person eh?" She said before hugging Eli slightly and walking away.

There it was again. That warm feeling that he got Liberty gave him advice. That feeling you get when you realize that you're aren't alone. Eli smiled and decided that one day in the near future he would take her up on that offer because for once In his life since Julia died he knew everything was going to be alright because he wasn't alone and someone out there understood how he felt.

He wasn't alone and just that thought made him smile his first real smile in days.