Raising Kids

Me: *speaking in British accent* Bonjour my little sunflowers
Matthew: This is just creepy now…
Ivan: *nods*
Me: *still in British accent* Shush! Who doesn't love an American, English/Russian/Somewhat French speaking writer?
The Real Me: SEALAND! GET AWAY FROM MY COMPUTER! *knocks him back to UK area* BTW Russian soup is like a bowl of fat with condiments! I'm serious but its SOOOOOOO good …Anyway here's Chapter Three!

Chapter Three

Many people knew that you shouldn't laugh at Ivan. He had the scary Russian vibe which is a very large stereotype on Russians. The only people who was allowed to somewhat laugh at him were his sisters and Matthew…but none of them knew how Ivan liked to clean the house. The first people that will learn this are…his kids.

Today Ivan was staying home since it was Matthew's turn to go to his job. Ivan finally got a chance to cook some Russian food. From the beginning of their marriage Alfred would come over every day so the couple wouldn't really have a chance to be newlyweds. Curse that American! Ivan would always think. After that he never got a chance to make any Russian food, and he rarely ate it now, well unless he was visiting his sisters. Katyusha would over feed anybody who came over like a grandmother. Natalia would make sure Ivan still had his figure and would freak out if he ate too much, especially with soup…

Anyway Ivan decided that he'd make pelmini, also known as Siberian dumplings. It would be a long process because he makes them from scratch. He would have to make the dough, and mix the meat, and still clean the house…

"Maybe I should have asked Katya to buy the pelmini that you just boil…ugh…" Ivan mumbled an hour in on making the food. Also just letting you know, Ivan wasn't the best cook…and he still had to clean the house. Ivan rolled his neck and went over to the iPod dock and turned up the sound. Russian pop filled the house. He knew he could do everything now.

Ivan was cleaning the floor and singing along to Tina Karol's Pupsik. He wouldn't get all of the chores finished and still make dinner, but he knew he could rely on the kids. But at the moment he didn't care because this song was amazing. Nobody could resist dancing to it either, so he ended up dancing to the song as well. The song was over and it switched to А Может Да by Света. This was a good song as well. Of course Ivan had to sing and dance to this song as well.

Unity was walking with her younger brother up the block to their house. Jamie was kicking the dirt as he walked and Unity was getting irritated with him.

"Can you stop?" she asked.

"It's fun though!" Jamie protested.

"It's annoying Jamie" Unity replied. Jamie pouted and stopped. Thank goodness Unity thought. She grabbed the house key out of her back pocket and unlocked the front door.

"Папа we're home!" she shouted. There wasn't a response but she heard music faintly playing. Jamie shrugged and went into the kitchen. Unity then followed her brother and saw something shocking. Ivan was singing and dancing to Russian music while making dinner.

"What are you doing?" Jamie asked their father out of random. Ivan stopped and looked at the two.

"You didn't see that да?" Ivan questioned.

"No we did…so why were you dancing?" Unity asked.

"Don't tell anyone that you saw me doing this да" their father replied.

"Why, it's not that embarrassing" his daughter told him.

"Yes it is!" Ivan whined.

"Does Papa know?" Jamie questioned. Ivan shook his head 'no'.

"He'd think it's cute" Unity said taking an apple, "and you might get some action".

"Excuse me?" Ivan asked. Unity just laughed and took a bite of the apple. Jamie was confused. He didn't know why his father was stern at this moment and why his big sister was ignoring their father.

"I don't get it!" Jamie yelled. Ivan and Unity looked at him and laughed. Jamie didn't think this was funny. It got him mad and he stormed off to watch television.

"That thing is going to rot his brain" Unity mumbled. Ivan nodded and went back to making dinner.

"So Papa do you like to dance?" Unity asked Matthew towards the end of dinner.

"Not really, why'd you ask?" Matthew questioned. Ivan was making sure he didn't blush.

"I just think you would since Папа obviously does"

"Ivan doesn't dance, he would at a party maybe, Natalia is into dancing…she did ballet for how long Ivan?" Matthew spoke. Ivan was ready to murder his daughter (not that he'd want to!).

"Since she was six да"

"Papa, Daddy was dancing to music today when we came home" Jamie blurted out. Never mind, he was ready to murder his son.

"Oh is that so?" Matthew asked raising an eyebrow as he looked at Ivan who was blushing like crazy. Unity mouthed the words "you're welcome" and then put her plate in the sink and told Jamie that she'll help him with his math homework. She knew that Jamie would make her do it for him but she wanted to give her fathers some alone time. Thank you Unity Ivan thought and let one thing lead to another.

So that was chapter three! What'd you guys think?
Matthew: I'm finally acting like a man?
Me: Uh sure…I enjoyed writing the whole Ivan part
Ivan: Why?
Me: Because it's fun
Alfred: HA! Even the writer thinks you're a commie bastard!
Me: No I don't idiot.
Alfred: How could you say that? You're one of my citizens!
Me: Yes but I do plan on becoming Canadian when I'm older (FREE HEALTH CARE!) and visiting Russia at one point.
Alfred: WHY?
Me: Because I don't like you Alfred…and because I want to see my culture, and I love Ivan! *dodges a couple knives from Natalia and a maple syrup bottle from Matthew* NOT THAT WAY! Wait a minute…Alfred why are you in the Author's Notes?
Alfred: Idk…Mattie and the commie are why can't I be here?
Me: It's a RussiaxCanada story dumbass… (BTW: The reason why Unity call's Ivan Dad in Russian is because in French and in Russian Dad is pronounced the same way… so the Russian word for dad is pronounced Papa)

Translations:
А Может Да-Maybe Yes (Russian)(Song Title)
Света-Sveta (Russian)(Russian Singer)
Папа- Dad/Daddy/Papa (Russian)
да- Yes (Russian)