So, so, so sorry! This is short but I think it is very satisfying. This is not a long chapter story but I figure it will have a lot of chapters. I love the feedback I am getting! I wish I could spend more time on this but I have so much summer homework. My school is intense. But I will get started on the next chapter as soon as possible. Love you all for being so forgiving!

Say it Again

It was a Wednesday. And every Wednesday Bianca went to the lake and wrote her letter to her parents. No matter what the weather, that is where she went. But that Wednesday she didn't quite make it. Once she made it on to the grounds a familiar, large hand gripped her upper arm and pulled her to the wall.

She dropped her rucksack. He towered over here and they just stared. Green meeting brown. His jaw was tight and she was scared. Scared he wouldn't understand. Scared he'd never forgive her. She didn't know what to say so she held her breath. She tilted her cheek into his palm when he brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. His eyes grew warmer but his demeanor was tight.

"Do you want him?" James asked her. She shook her head and a warm tear streamed down her face, hitting the heel of his hand. "Why do you do this to me? Do you want me to lay awake at night? Do you want me to be distracted and just a wretched mess?"

"No James. No…"

"Because that's what you're doing to me." He flushed his body to hers. "Why? I never thought you to be cruel. Yet, you torture me so."

She buried her face into his shirt so it would soak up her tears "James, this isn't like the other times. This isn't for my personal gain or to make you jealous. I have to do this. I…"

"No Bianca," he touched her lifted her head with his hand "Don't do this. It's killing us both."

"I have to do this or my family James. We'll lose everything if I don't. You'd do anything for your family James. Don't deny it. It's what I've learned from you."

"Don't you dare make me the cause, Bianca, I love you. You know I love you. I fought it. I failed. No one compares. No one will ever compare. Don't do this," he growled. He let his other hand reach up to cup her face to hold her still. To make sure she was looking into his eyes. "We've been wretched. We've fought endlessly. But I will never regret us. I will never regret this pain because it proves I love you. It gives me the strongest conviction. It also makes me hate him. More than it is healthy to hate anyone. When I sleep," he let out a haggard breath "when I sleep all I can dream about is his lips on your skin, your smell on his clothes, his words in your mind," he choked.

"I love you."

It was the first time she had ever said the words aloud.

Yet, the silence was deafening.

He dropped his hands from her face and his forehead rolled on her shoulder in defeat, letting out a loud groan. His nose would graze from her shoulder to her neck. His lips pantomimed the kiss he craved to give her. "You're someone elses…"

Her hand reached up to the top of his neck where his hear met the skin. "No. Just to the public eye. Let me love you James. I'm ready. I need you. I know this isn't how we want it but I have to protect my family but it will drive me absolutely mad. Keep me sane. Let me love you."

James body pressed harder into hers and his fingers flashed to her sides. He squeezed there. Her whimper was so faint that no lover other than James would ever hear it. He was so attuned to everything about her, it was useless to ignore. He finally kissed her neck and whispered against her skin, "Say it again."

"I love you."

The pressure in his chest lessened. Like a layer of cloud just stripped from his rib cage. His kissed under her jaw. "Say it again."

"I love you." The words were like butter bear on her tongue. So warm, so filling.

His lips traveled to the corner of her lip as he whispered, "Say it again,"

New tears sprouted from her eyes. Happy ones. "I love you."

"I love you too." And he kissed, pulling the familiar taste of her tongue into his mouth. Her hands slipped with her weak knees but he caught her with one arm around her waist and the other in its favorite spot weaved in her hair. When her hands were useful they went to his face, feeling his stubble on her palm. She arched into his body trying to get as close as possible in their layers of clothing. His mouth pressed hard on hers as they worked. When he tried to travel to her neck she shook her head and ducked down to catch his lips once more. Biting and pulling on his bottom lip.

The way he moved against her was too reminiscent of their time in the Gryffindor Tower dormitory beds. It filled them both with thoughts and yearnings of privacy. Privacy they did not have at the moment. They pulled apart. He couldn't let his hands wander on public grounds was not the place to do such things. He didn't untangle his limbs but he cooled h breathing down. When he could properly speak he again he whispered "I'll always remind you. Your thoughts will never be of him." He pushed a strand of hair from her face. "I won't allow it."

"I'll write to you; every day if you'd like." It was the first time she had ever promised a correspondence. It was bitter sweet, the first time she was ever really trying but she had to be torn. Seen by Jack and loved by James.

He nodded. "I'll visit. I'll meet you where ever I can. We'll be together Bianca. We will. You won't betray your family. You just need the society boost not a…marriage proposal." Even though there was still a question in his voice.

"No," she confirmed. "No wedding proposals from Jack."

I can't write without reveiws.