Title: Far Away

Author: LogicBomb.32

Ships: This is a weird one because it is partly Maura/OC and Jane/Maura

Summary: "So you'd rather sit here, in so much pain, rather than risk it all?"

Authors Note: Here it is, the slightly anticipated third section. The response to the last chapter was amazing, so much more than I expected. This chapter was hard to write for multiple factors but in the end I think I got it to work out all right.

Thanks to: Seriesfreak AND BuildAnEmpire AND Spikesagitta AND Kai-chan14.

To Name: You're review was just about the most profound thing that I have ever heard in my life, no lie (and just to prove it I'm going to post it here: Of course Maura came back. Epic love is like that. It takes people away across oceans and continents. Tears are shed. Blood is spilled. It breaks down the human soul until there's almost nothing left. But then, the dust settles and the skies clear, and those who are truly meant to be together always find their way back to each other. Always) Anyway, that epic statement about love was a major inspiration for this chapter and for that I thank you.

To Antonne: Your review was also quite epic, another driving force behind this chapter and I hope that this can fulfill part, if not all, of what you asked me to do.

To Swishla: I didn't have a chance to reply to your review via PM so I figured I add it here, I have to agree that it is amazing how much pain we humans can put ourselves through and Jane, as you said, is a good example of that. She puts herself through the wringer just so someone else can be happy.

Anyway, enough, read, enjoy. Be happy.

I open my eyes and I meet your gaze "What I wouldn't, couldn't tell you four months ago Maura was that-that"

I can't do this.

I've never said can't before in my life, except when I couldn't handle Hoyt anymore, you were there for that as well.

I'm in the corner, gun clenched tightly in my hand and the barrel pressing into my temple. I'm willing myself to pull the trigger but the only thing stopping is Frankie, he's sitting right outside my door and I couldn't do that do him. I couldn't let him be the one to find my body, still warm to the touch.

It would destroy him, and I'm not going to let Hoyt destroy two Rizzoli's.

But the barrel is so tempting, the sweet relief it would bring, the abyss I would descend into, I want it. I want to escape Hoyt and all the terror he has instilled in me, but I can't.

Footsteps.

I hear footsteps.

"Jane?"

It's you.

I can't speak, I can't say a word, and my fear has paralyzed every part of me.

"Jane?" you repeat and I can hear the fear creep into your voice as you begin to worry, begin to wonder if I've gone off the deep end.

The barrel of the gun is still pressed into my temple but I'm looking at the door, the tears beginning to fall down face once again. I hear you pause in front of my door and I know your mustering the courage to open it.

I know you're wondering that if behind this door is your best friends body.

You open the door.

You scan the dark room and you almost miss me, I can tell because your eyes skate over me, and then double back and they soften.

"Oh Jane." You say and you take a step into the room "Jane, please put it down."

I shake my head slowly.

You take another step forward "Please."

"I-I can't." I choke out "Maura, I can't do this anymore."

You're less than a foot from me now "You can." You say, sitting down next to be but not making a motion to take the gun from my hand "You are so much stronger than he is Jane, I know you are."

"I'm not." I say, "Look at me."

"This isn't defeat." You say "This just means you've been strong for far too long. Don't pull the trigger without knowing that you'll never be alone in this Jane. I don't care what time it is, where I am or where you are, you never have to be alone. I promise you that."

The tears are racing down my face, each one faster than the next and I look over at you. Not that I needed to see it, but the sincerity in your eyes and the complete fear that you're going to watch me pull the trigger. And I let the gun go, setting it gentle on the floor before kicking it away.

It's the last thing I do before I loose all control and I fall into your arms.

You seem to recognize the moral dilemma that I'm having with this and you place one hand gently on top of mine "I'm already here Jane, I'm not going anywhere. I came from California to help you, nothing you say will change how I feel about you, about us."

I'm not so sure about that.

"You want to know what happened to me Maura? I fell into a movie." You're confused and you're about to voice it but I press on, seizing the momentary courage I've found "I-I fell in love with my best friend. I fell in love with you Maura and I couldn't do a goddamn thing about it. It wasn't supposed to happen, I didn't plan it but, but then it did and then you found Aaron and, and you were so happy. I couldn't ruin that for you."

You're looking at me and I'm wondering how long it is before you walk out the door, again, but at least this time I know it won't be my fault.

But you're still here, holding my hand, looking at me.

It's unnerving to say the least.

"Say something." I say, I need to know what you're feeling because right now your face is unreadable.

"I-I don't know what to say Jane."

Great. Fucking fantastic.

"I just told you that I'm in love with you Maura, love, like get married and fuck like bunnies love. And that doesn't leave you with something to say?"

You shake your head "That's what you couldn't tell me?"

"No, I lied just to make you feel awkward." I spat, irritated "Yes Maura, I wasn't going to make you pick between me and Aaron so I picked for you. I thought I could get over you, but apparently it's a hell of a lot harder getting over your best friend than I you would think."

"I know." You say.

"What, what do you mean you know. Maura I'm not just talking about losing your best friend but losing the best friend you were in love with."

"I know." You repeat and now I'm just confused

"Wait, Maura, what are you saying?"

You take a breath and this time it's my turn to wait, with baited breath for her to talk.

"What I'm saying is, is that, I know how you feel."

Still not making any sense "Maura, I'm really confused right now. What are you telling me?"

Another deep breath "I'm trying to tell you that I know how it feels to fall in love with your best friend and then lose that person."

Is she talking about me?

My head is spinning, although that could be the lack of sleep finally kicking in, after four months "Maura, are you saying that you had" I search my mind for the right word "feelings for me?"

You nod "Yes." You admit

"But, Aaron? What was that?"

God I don't know if I should be confused or excited or stupid or something else entirely.

You sigh, looking around you, then you speak "I'm a hypocrite."

Why?

"I asked you, four months ago, if you would rather sit here in pain rather than risk it all and the thing is, that's what I've been doing Jane. I've been too afraid to admit to anyone, not even myself, that I was in love with you. I thought that if I got involved with somebody else, someone like Aaron that maybe, just maybe I would be able to get over you. Or at least get over this, these, feelings I have for you. I've never felt anything like it before. It's like, it's like" you're struggling to find the right words.

"It's okay. Take a breath Maur-" I say slowly, not sure what's going inside my own body.

"It feels like my intestines are twisting and turning inside of me and even thought I know it's not actually happening, whenever you walk in, whenever I'm around you, my pulse races and it scared me. I've never felt like that about anyone and it scared me that I would be feeling like that for my best friend, for you."

We lapse into silence for a moment, you catching my breath and me, well I'm trying to figure out what the hell is going on. I do know:

Maura is here, in my apartment from Los Angeles.

I admitted my feelings for her, my romantic feelings.

She admitted having (or had) similar feelings for me.

Where do we go from here?

"So, what now?" I ask, not entirely sure if you're going to have an answer "I mean Maura you're married, married to a great guy. A guy who deserves you, so much more than I do. "

You need to go back to him, it's the only way that this will work.

"No, Jane, I'm not going back to him."

I look up at you, in shock, plain and simple shock to see you holding up your ring finger, empty "Maura, why, why did you do that?"

"I told him the truth." You say

"Of course you did." I mutter

You ignore me "He told me that he knew, he said that he could tell by the way our fighting and, and everything else, tore me apart. He could tell that I was dealing with something else besides losing my best friend. He get's it."

Like I said, a good guy. Not many men would 'get' their wife leaving him to come back to their hometown to check on a friend that has, in the words of my mother 'spiraled out of control'.

"So" I repeat "Now what?"

"This." You say and take the step towards me and then we're kissing.

I push back, away from you. It's not that I didn't enjoy because I did but "Maura" I say, once again running my hands through my hair "Maura, sweetheart, I can't. Not right now."

You're so confused and, oh shit, no, no, "Don't cry Maura."

"I thought?" you say "I thought that's what you wanted."

I take your hands in mine "It is, but Maura, not like this. I want us to be friends first, I want to make sure things work like that and then, and then we can go down that road. But right now, right I just want you, Maura, my friend, here, with me."

You push back the tears and nod "I'm sorry." I say "I'm so sorry, but I do want to get to that point. I want to call you my girlfriend and buy you drinks and have sex with you, but not, not yet."

"No" you say "You're right. Let's start over?" you ask, looking up at me.

I nod "As friends and, and then we can see where that takes us."

You nod and smile, and then we're hugging.

And for the first time in, in god knows how long, it seems like things might just turn out okay. Because you're back, but "Where are you going to work?" I ask

You look up at me "At the precinct." You state, as if that should have been obvious "I already got my job lined up, they were more than happy to reaccept me."

"You were planning on staying on Boston?" I question, taking a step back and looking at you.

"I was willing to risk it all." You reply and I smile "And I'm glad I did."

"Me to Maura, me too."

Well? I hope that you got some of the happy ending that you wanted, it just didn't feel right to have them jump right into the making out due to what they have each gone through.

My question, as I am considering this is:

Do you want me to continue this story?

There are certain factors that you are going to have to remember:

I am in college, so updates will be sporadic

And that's it really, any interest?

Thanks,

LogicBomb.32