Chapter Seven: No, But Yer, But No.

A/N: I don't own any of the characters from the Harry Potter novels. I just play with them, and then return them when I'm bored.

Please review, I can't offer you anything if you do. But if you don't you will meet an untimely death. Probably at my hands. :)

"Must have been born on a highway, that's where most accidents happen" Hermione muttered as she placed a reference book back on the shelf. The library was empty but for her and a sleeping student sitting by the fire, who in fifteen minutes time she would have to steer out the door. Again, as per usual, she was complaining and whining about Malfoy, if only to herself. Though today had passed without major incident, Hermione still had annoyance to vent. Somehow, Malfoy had weaseled himself into the circle of her friends. "Oh Ginerva, blab la bla" she muttered to herself, doing her best imitation of Malfoy's charming voice. Even Harry was being abnormally cordial, doing what he thought was right for Hermione's sake. Still, there was always Ron to count on; he would never bend to Malfoy. She smiled in satisfaction knowing this much, and then her smile quickly slipped.

After the talk down she had gotten yesterday, Hermione needed to put a cap on her rampant thoughts. They weren't helping in the least, and sadly enough, it took Malfoy to show her that. As much as Hermione despised to admit it, it did seem that all of the negativity she released in the world came back at her tenfold, especially when she vented to Ron about anything. For Ron was always prepared to complain himself.

After a full week of hell, today had been a pretty tolerable day. She had even sat with Malfoy and picked linens, for the wedding their mothers were planning without them, during dinner. While Ginny had no problem giving her input on the passé colour of lilac, and Harry and Ron ignored them pointedly. Now, Hermione was finishing her day by volunteering in the library as honorary librarian. Madame Pince had never been found after the final battle, and since nobody was aware of her whereabouts, the library had fallen to disregard. Hermione had gladly taken on the role of librarian, she practically knew every book in the library, and was one of the few students who could work through the obscure and mathematics free cataloguing system. Hermione placed a tattered Confronting the Faceless between Don't Turn Around and Secrets to Surviving Sinister Sorcerer's. She had completed the nights work; all she had left to do was a sweep of the premises to make sure no students were left in the library, and no books lying around on the ground and tables.

"Up, up, go to your dorm before Filch get his manacles on you" Hermione said prodding the third year Hufflepuff awake. Filch was miserable due to Madame Pince's disappearance, as if he wasn't miserable enough already, but he had no problem using corporal punishment. Groggily the Hufflepuff stood and began to pack, the very real threat of Filch lighting a fire under his arse. Hermione looked around the common area, everything looked neat and clean. She watched the student walk out of the library, and then Hermione began to amble between the rows. She smiled remembering how as much younger versions of themselves she, Harry, and Ron would sneak into the library after close and borrow books from the restricted section. There were no students who did that now. Hermione barely ever saw students in the library lately. Back in her fifth year, it had always been packed. Students even sitting on the floors in-between cases studying for their O.W.L's or N.E.W.T.'s, or generally worrying over their latest paper returned with a bright green 'T' stamped on it. Even with Madame Pince's constant "Shhhhs" there was always a buzz of hushed whispers, quill scratches, and pages being turned. Now, there was complete silence.

Hermione walked back to the main desk, she placed all the sign-out books back into their drawers, and with a wave of her wand turned off all the candle lights but a few. The door closed behind her with a familiar and solid thud. Hermione did not bother to lock it. It would have made her happier to know that somebody could enter the library whenever they wanted, though it had not happened yet.

She decided to take another sweep of the castle and make sure all of the younger students were in bed now. The eleven o'clock curfew had long since passed, and whoever was still out was in for a world of pain should Filch find them.

It wasn't technically part of Hermione's duties to make sure that there were no students in the halls, but she took it upon herself to help where she could. There were so few professors left at Hogwarts that simply up keeping the castle, and making sure certain tasks were completed was beginning to fall to disregard. So Hermione retained her head-girl status and did her best to keep Hogwarts the respectable academy it was.

She headed downstairs to the main floor, picking up a fallen quill from the stairs as she went. There were no ghosts roaming the halls, but she could hear Peeves singing from a distance...

"Oh when I see you, you give me a face-ache,

But it's your phizog I'd like to break.

Some come on over, I'll give you a trip,

Shuffle you features, and give it a fix!"

Hermione rolled her eyes and continued past the great hall, walking at a good distance from the suits of armour, which had on occasion proved to be frisky. Peeve's lyrical styling's continued on behind her, growing quieter. Yeats had nothing on his ability to emote. A breeze flew past her ankles, causing her robes to ruffle. Hermione turned around and noticed that the front door was open a crack. She walked over to it and placed her hand on the door to shut it, wondering if a student had left the building after hours. But Hermione didn't close the door, she stood there hand on the door listening...'elp...' Hermione swallowed. 'elp me...omody...' The wind was raging outside. Hermione was imagining things. Or so she hoped. If some first year had been foolish enough to head outside at this time...into the forest...no, only she Harry and Ron had been foolish enough to do such things.

"HELP ME!"

When she heard the obvious cry, Hermione just about went arse over kettle. She grabbed the door and pulled it open, looking out onto the grounds. This, she had not imagined. Hermione could see no dark shapes anywhere. The wind continued to blow, pulling her further outside.

"Please..."

Her flesh rippled, Hermione couldn't mistake that voice even with the distortion of the wind. She walked further away from the door, taking a good look around. She began to walk down the path past the Herbology buildings, and towards the Whomping Willow, from where she thought the cries originated. She heard a yell again, to her right. The surface of the water was rippling, he was in the lake.

"Toss-pot" she muttered running down the steps three at a time towards the lake. "What are you doing, get out of the water!" she yelled as she came right to the edge of the lake.

Malfoy was bobbing at least fifteen meters out in the water. "-an't...immm"

"What?" Hermione cried furiously, stomping her left foot on the ground.

"I can't, -wim" he gurgled, swallowing water. His arms were flailing above his head frantically.

"Yes, but of course. Why don't you pull the other one?" she screeched in disbelief. How could he not swim? Wasn't that a skill all people should have succeeded by now? A wizard who couldn't swim, it seemed absurd, where was his wand?

He went under. Hermione waited for him to resurface, but he didn't. She couldn't wait much longer. He didn't have any time left, there wasn't any time to think about what Malfoy was doing in the water at this time, or how she would get him out; her only instinct was to jump in there. Hermione ripped off her cloak, tucked her wand into her skirt waistband and jumped. The water was very cold, even though it was already May. She choked out a "Lumos" and her wand lit brightly. Thankfully it didn't seem as though Malfoy had been out too deep. Hermione wouldn't have been able to fight off any water dwellers while dragging him back to the surface. There was nothing but darkness around her, the lake floor too deep down for the light from her wand to penetrate. She broke the surface and looked around. She was well into the lake, but Malfoy hadn't surfaced. Hermione dived back down, wishing now she could remember that stupid bubble head spell, but the words escaped her. A few meters ahead she saw a dark shape, suspended in the water, neither sinking nor floating. Hermione grabbed Malfoy's shirt with her other hand and kicked up. Suddenly, all she was holding was the shirt. It had slipped off over his head. Hermione looked down to see him sinking again.

She was running out of air and energy. This had to be a onetime possibility, if she let him go a second time; they were both as good as dead. Hermione swam deeper; she hooked her arm around Malfoy's neck in the same way she had been taught as a nine year old during swimming lessons and kicked up. Her muscles and lungs burned with the exertion. Hermione was not an overly physical girl, she did not consider herself strong, and this was more than she had even handled physically. If it was at all believable. Malfoy was heavy, combined with the layers of wet clothing they were both wearing; it felt as though Hermione was dragging a sleeping Fang behind her.

Finally she gasped and inhaled fresh air. Hermione flipped over on her back and dragged Malfoy up, facing him towards the surface. It only took a total of eleven strokes to reach the bank. Not as far away as Hermione had suspected the edge to be. She dragged Malfoy shirtless up the bank by the arms and dropped him on the grass. She could hear the Crups chained by Hagrid's cottage barking loudly, she felt relieved for the moment. "Just what were you thinking" Hermione gasped down at him.

She dropped to her knees beside him and hovered her cheek over his face. He wasn't breathing. "Eneverate" she muttered pointing her wand at his chest. His body lurched, but his eyes did not open.

'Oh no' Hermione thought 'no way in hell am I going to do that'. "Come on Malfoy" she muttered opening his mouth and looking inside. Hermione frowned; she began to compress his chest, forcing his lungs to move. After fifteen, Hermione realized it wasn't going to do any good. She needed to about this the old fashioned way. She sighed and pinched his nose. Hermione took a deep breath and blew deep into his mouth; as few of these as she had to do, the better. "Come on" she muttered, another deep breath. How long had it been since he'd been in the water? Hermione had no idea of the time.

"One more" she said, more to herself than him. Hermione breathed deeply into Malfoy again, the sudden rush of water that flew into her mouth startled her. She spluttered and turned away coughing. Disgusting Malfoy backwash. Malfoy had turned to his side and was heaving, probably vomiting. She sat back on the grass patiently and waited for him to regain his senses.

"What...why" he gasped trying to speak.

"You tell me" Hermione muttered. Angry, but strangely relieved he wasn't dead.

"I was just going to my room...and, I put down my wand for a moment...Then I was in the water, I don't know" he whispered hoarsely. And Hermione believed him. Malfoy had really been through the ringer. He was paler than usual, and his eyes were rimmed with red.

"You can't swim?" Hermione asked him.

He just shook his head.

"Come on" she said standing; she pulled his arm, helping him up.

"What happened to my shirt?" he mused looking down at his bare chest.

"Yeah, that's gone" Hermione sighed tiredly.

"You didn't let me die" he continued, apparently bemused with his current situation.

"Why would I?" Hermione asked frowning.

"I don't know...maybe because then you could cross off number one on Granger's list of '10 things to accomplish before I'm thirty' "he concluded looking towards the friendly lights of the castle. Longing as much as Hermione seemed to be for some warmth and maybe soup from the kitchens house elves.

"Sound as a pound" Hermione retorted, still supporting his weight as he feebly shuffled beside her.

"So why did you, jump in after me?"

Hermione rolled her eyes and sighed, "It was the right thing to do. I'm not an awful person, and there's a difference between killing you and letting you die. If I just let you die, I won't have the personal satisfaction of knowing I did it all my own" she explained sarcastically.

Malfoy didn't reply. Hermione chanced a look at him, he looked weary, but he was smiling. Perhaps the lack of oxygen to his brain had affected him. Should she take him to Madame Pomfrey, was there anything she could give him besides a Pepper-up-Potion? Hermione faced forward again.

"Stop giving me the evils" Malfoy said in his poor attempt at a Vicky Pollard imitation. Hermione gawped at him.

"Awful, just awful" she frowned shaking her head, "And since when do purebloods own televisions, and watch comedies?"

"They can, as long as their all-things-muggle-hating father's never find out" he smiled half-heartedly.

Hermione scowled, he was being awfully chipper for someone who almost died. "I've never been to the Slytherin common room, you'll have to explain to me how to get there" she said as she pulled open the entrance door and they shuffled in.

"Can't you magic me a cot, I'll just sleep here" he suggested seriously.

"Yes, and terrify the first years so early in the morning. I think not" Hermione turned towards the staircase heading down to the potion labs.

"How do you know you're going the right way?"

"Am I wrong?"

"No" Malfoy admitted.

The continued down the long hallway, and down another set of stairs. Coming to a long dark hallway with green enchanted candles, that made Hermione feel as though they were back underwater. Malfoy suddenly lurched to a stop, Hermione looked around for the portrait guardian. "Wolfsbane" Malfoy muttered to the wall. And it swung back to reveal a large room. No portrait then.

The Slytherin common room was much larger than the Gryffindor common room, and was mostly circular. Intricate columns surrounded all the doors around the room, the ceiling a large carved dome. The floor looked hard, polished stone or marble. And the overall effect was very cold. The fireplace was not lit, and the black couches and green lighting cast an icy shadow over the area. She walked carefully down the steps and dropped Malfoy on one of the leather couches. "Incendio" Hermione said pointing her wand at the fireplace. A strong red fire immediately burst to life, giving the room a warmer feel. "Why is everything so green here?" she muttered.

"We're under the lake" Malfoy replied quietly.

Hermione's eyes widened in shock. That would explain why the common room was so deep under the ground. They went down at least five flights of stairs to get here. Hermione shivered violently, she didn't want to be anywhere near the lake, let alone under the damned thing.

"Are you going to be alright? You should go and change into some clean cloths and get some sleep. It wouldn't hurt to go up to the hospital wing tomorrow either" Hermione said sniffling, wrapping her arms around herself. Malfoy groaned and sat up.

"I'll be fine...thanks" he added uncertainly.

"Yeah, sure" Hermione muttered. She turned and walked sharpish out of the common room.

Hermione collapsed on her bed tiredly. Her whole body ached. It was now nearing one, and she had class at nine tomorrow...if she wasn't Hermione Granger, she would have played hooky. Perhaps if she was sick in the morning, she would just stay in bed, even if it was wrong. Hermione pulled the sheets up to her chin and exhaled deeply. Reaching over to turn off her lamp, Hermione only then realized that there was an envelope on top of her book. She sat up in bed, taking the envelope into both of her hands. It said nothing but her name. Gently she opened it and pulled out the letter,

Congratulations Ms Granger,

I would like to inform you that you have completed the first task to your ministry marriage training before the deadline of May the ninth.

"Which is tomorrow, how incredibly lucky of me" Hermione muttered bitterly.

The next assignment begins tomorrow, and you have five days to complete it. If you succeed in the allotted time the third assignment will be an optional matter. We at the Marriage Law and Contract Law Department in the Ministry of Magic sincerely wish you the best, and hope that you continue to take this training seriously. It is for the benefit of our society and well-being and will ultimately benefit you as well. We ask for your continued support in this ministry endeavour, and that if you have any questions or concerns, they can be mailed to your bookkeeper Nancy McKinnon.

Sincerely,

Oliver Keaton (Of the Marriage Law and Contract Law Department in the Ministry of Magic)

Hermione read the owl three times over before coming to the conclusion that Mr. Keaton never once alluded to what the first assignment was, nor what the second one entailed. This was preposterous, how could she possibly be expected to complete tasks without knowing what they were. It was like walking blindly in the dungeons, hoping you could find the correct door leading upstairs, but never knowing when you'd find yourself somewhere dangerous. Hermione set the letter back on her nightstand. First thing tomorrow she would send Nancy and owl, demanding to know what the next assignment was.

For now, Hermione was wondering about what the first assignment had been. Had it simply been to save Malfoy from drowning? It seemed obvious that that little excursion had been ministry orchestrated. But it was also obvious that Hermione would save him, she wouldn't have let him drown. The only person she would have let that happen to would have been Voldemort, and he hadn't actually been a person. Hermione imagined Voldemort floundering in the water, unable to swim, and it brought a smile to her face. Still, the whole ordeal worried her. There was something else there that she had or hadn't done, that didn't have anything to do with Malfoy's drowning. It couldn't have been that easy, if it was, then there was no point to any of these tests. It bothered her beyond sanities capacity to not know what was actually occurring.

First thing tomorrow, that owl needed to go out.

"Mate, a letter for you" Blaise said waving an envelope in front of Draco.

"What is it?" Draco muttered waving Blaise's hand away. He wasn't in the mood for games; he was in the mood for sleep, and now. "Why are you still awake anyway, it's after one" he grumbled.

"Just made my way back from the Ravenclaw prefect's room" Blaise grinned sheepishly.

"I'm sure Millicent will love that" Draco laughed.

"She doesn't need to know about my extracurricular activities. Beside, don't act as though you don't have a bit on the side" Blaise smiled lying down on his bunk.

"I'm a one woman kind of man" Draco shrugged as he opened his letter.

"Blimey, I know Granger's a dish. But she has you on a leash; does she feed you kibbles and bits too?" Blaise laughed clutching his sides.

Draco didn't respond, he was reading his letter. When he had completed it, he placed it back into the envelope and dropped it in his bedside table drawer. "No, she feeds me on other things, nourishment you'll never take willingly from Millicent. Shame, she's so giving that girl" Draco smirked.

"Oh please" Blaise said offhandedly, "I don't believe you're getting anything from Granger but beatings...unless that's your new thing. Because, I won't judge"

Draco grimaced, "Hardly, we were wrapped around each other earlier, real wet moment" he suggested fixing his sheets around him. It hadn't been a total lie.

"I'll believe it when I see it" Blaise grinned turning off the light.

"You and the whole world" Draco sighed, turning to his side and thinking about the contents of the letter, and what a fantastic clusterfuck he now found himself in.