Chapter 3 No One To Blame But Yourself

Why can't I keep my fucking mouth shut? He coursed himself. He couldn't stop the scene from replaying in his mind like a broken record.

"Put it out. I can't reach it, Elena," he pleaded. Elena grabbed the arrow sticking out of his back hesitantly. He'd actually be surprised if a week passed by and neither fire nor wood had threatened his life. It was getting tedious. "Just put the damn thing out. It hurts." She finally gathered the courage to remove it and he shook off the momentary pain. "That bitch is dead!" he singsonged turning around.

"No! You're not gonna kill her!" she protested with that judgy tone of hers.

"Why?" he asked confused. "Don't you see how dangerous her Buffy complex is? The world will be a safer place without her," he reasoned, improvising some big-picture perspective. Elena narrowed her eyes at him, her jaw clenched. Thank God she didn't have Bonnie's powers or he would've probably experienced what instantaneous combustion felt like. "Oh, come on! She tried to kill you! And my back's gonna feel sore the rest of the evening!"

"Damon, don't. Please."

Doing his best not to let her get to him he walked towards the door but she blocked him. He stepped to the side and she mirrored him immediately. She tried to stare him down, using her most incriminating glare, but clearly she didn't know him very well. Damon forgot about Teresa or whatever-her-name-was and narrowed his eyes at her. He stepped to the right once again and got the same reaction from her as before. She could really go on for hours with that little game knowing the depths of her stubbornness. It was time for it to stop. He took her hand and twirled her around a few times, her hair spread into the air, giving it a floral scent. After a moment he pulled her back to him and they swayed from side to side.

"What are you doing?" she laughed, just slightly irritated.

"I thought you wanted to dance!" he shrugged and admired the smile he had put on her face. She was really beautiful. Sure, she shared Katherine's gentle features but that hardly reminded him of her anymore. Elena lived up to the meaning of her name. She was pure light. And he liked it.

"Thank you," she said shyly, looking up at him with those Disney-like chocolate eyes.

"Always a pleasure to dance with you," he smirked.

"Not about that. You saved my life."

"Well, if I don't get you back home unharmed, someone might set me on fire in my sleep," he replied. "Didn't want to risk it."

"Stop doing that!" she punched his arm. "You keep pretending you don't care about anyone but yourself. That's not true!"

"What if I do care?" he replied invading her private space as usual, smirk in place. Only this time she didn't step back. That caught him by surprise. Her proximity started affecting his trail of thought. "You don't even realize the power you have over people, do you? I still can't figure out how you convinced Bonnie, probably one of my top haters, to help Stefan get me out of that burning basement. And… I didn't get the chance to thank you for that, by the way. Not the real you."

Sheer surprise was written all over Elena's face. That wasn't the kind of conversations they usually had. "Was that what you told Katherine when… you thought it was me?" she quietly asked and Damon nodded. "You're welcome," she whispered and a small smile illuminated her face, but there was something in her eyes, a glimpse of… melancholy? For a moment he thought she wished she had been the one on the porch that night. Stop seeing what you want to see, he thought. But wait… why was she leaning closer? His eyes drifted immediately to her half-open lips and he moved closer too. The sweet scent of her breath hit him.

But something inside him snapped and he closed his eyes fiercely. "I slept with Katherine," he breathed out. She didn't react for a few moments and he thought hopefully that she hadn't heard him. But…

"What?" she whispered, still painfully close, a reminder of what he just ruined. If he could go back he would've stoned himself to death before he could fuck up a moment like that.

Once the words sunk in she stepped back. "What?" she yelled this time. He opened his eyes just in time to receive the most rage-charged slap in world history. He had to admit he had seen that one coming.

"Ouch," he stroked his jaw and prepared for the upcoming outburst of hatred and betrayal. Why, Damon? He got her right where he wanted her. Willingly! Why, he kept asking himself. He tried to shut out the annoying little voice inside his head telling him that she deserved to know the truth. Nope, that didn't sound like him at all.

He watched Elena as her cheeks went through every color of the rainbow until finally a furious bright crimson set in. "You fucking manipulative, self-centered, psychopathic son of a bitch," she spit out, her little hands slamming furiously against his chest. "And I thought you had changed. What am I? Your new plaything?"

"You're not," was all he was capable of saying.

She laughed hysterically. "And you actually expect me to believe that… What? You two had a fight or something and decided to get some temporarily replacement?" she snapped, deep disgust slipping through her words. "What was this? Your way of making your bitchy girlfriend jealous and pissing off Stefan at the same time? A win-win, right?"

He had run out of comebacks.

"You were never a game, Elena. She can't compare to you," he managed to say. His voice sounded aloof even to himself. His face was broken, reflecting what he truly felt for the first time in a very long time. Elena turned away, unable to either believe or watch his pain.

"How could you? She almost killed John!"

"Well, I did kill him." Something between a laugh and a shriek escaped her lips. Great comeback, Einstein!

"You're defending her now?" she got even more upset, if possible. "All this time, you were plotting with her against us?" she asked, her voice shaking. He could barely resist the urge to wipe away the tears rolling down her cheeks. "Caroline? How could you do that?"

"Elena it's not-"

"Don't you dare say one word. I can't believe you're with her! Don't you remember opening that nasty tomb?" her tone softened but her empathy vanished as quickly as it had appeared. "You know what? I hope she rips your heart out again. You two deserve each other," she spit out and stormed out of the room.

He caught Alaric with his peripheral vision shifting uncomfortably in the driver seat. During the hour and a half trip neither Elena nor Damon had said a word. The tension in the atmosphere was so dense you could choke on it.

"What happened with you two?" he finally asked although Damon was sure he had heard at least part of their fight.

"A little disagreement, that's all. By tomorrow all that frowning will be gone, right Elena?"

"You wish," she seethed, her eyes never leaving the landscape they were passing through.

What could he say to get out of that mess? It wasn't just Elena discovering new levels of hatred towards him. The moment they stepped foot in Mystic Falls, she would go running to Stefan. And Bonnie…

Shit. He was a dead man.